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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22716091">I Wanna Be Yours</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kalyppso/pseuds/Kalyppso'>Kalyppso</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Anal Fingering, Anal Plug, Anal Sex, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Background Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Dedue Molinaro - Freeform, Background Dorothea Arnault/Petra Macneary - Freeform, Background Raphael Kirsten/Ignatz Victor, Background Relationships, Background Sylvain Jose Gautier/Felix Hugo Fraldarius - Freeform, Blow Jobs, Cunnilingus, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Foursome, M/M, Multi, My Unit is not Byleth, Nonbinary My Unit | Byleth, Other, Polyamory, Rimming, Romance, Smut, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Strap-Ons, Threesome, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Vibrators</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 03:55:52</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>33</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>128,869</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22716091</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kalyppso/pseuds/Kalyppso</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>A Soulmate AU in a modern setting for Claude x Lorenz x Hilda x Fae (an afab nonbinary My Unit).</p><p>Claude helps people find their soulmates, professionally, but that doesn't mean he wants to find his own. Tensions rise when Lorenz, his boyfriend, hires him to do just that. Meanwhile Hilda is frustrated with seeking her own soulmate and starts a budding relationship with Fae. They'll figure it out before the end.</p><p>Previously titled: "I'll Find You"</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hilda Valentine Goneril/Claude von Riegan, Hilda Valentine Goneril/My Unit | Byleth, Lorenz Hellman Gloucester/Claude von Riegan, Lorenz Hellman Gloucester/Hilda Valentine Goneril, Lorenz Hellman Gloucester/Hilda Valentine Goneril/Claude von Riegan, Lorenz Hellman Gloucester/Hilda Valentine Goneril/Claude von Riegan/My Unit | Byleth, Lorenz Hellman Gloucester/My Unit | Byleth, My Unit | Byleth/Claude von Riegan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>87</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>35</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. You're Not Looking At Me But That's Okay</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Soulmates aren't real and this AU does not explore aromanticism. Love yourself!</p><p>All Fire Emblem properties and characters have credit to Nintendo and their respective creators / owners. I'm just playing.</p><p>Everyone is their post timeskip ages.</p><p>Chapters which have smut will feature the relevant character names in parentheses for easy access.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Romantic love epitomized the fundamental needs of connection, camaraderie, and understanding built into a society that had come to associate these needs with soulmates. When one came of age at twenty, the possibility that your soulmark, a symbol present since birth, unique as a snowflake, would glow, or change color, or undergo another kind of change when you were in contact with your soulmate became a reality that the residents of Fodlan just had to deal with. Whether magical, divine, or an evolutionary sympathy, no one ever heard of these connections being untrue. The astronomical value placed upon finding your soulmate often left people crushed, and not everyone was destined to find theirs before the end of their life.</p><p>Desperate souls pursued all manner of options to discover their soulmates, including hiring private investigators to investigate their own lives, to help determine if there was something they were missing — someone they were missing, in their day to day activities, even in a society that promoted handshakes for almost all social interaction.</p><p>Claude von Riegan had his own such practice. He’d studied law, but a distaste for The System, had brought him down this path instead. If he had to guess, about eighty percent of his clients already knew their soulmate, so even when he compiled a list of likely candidates, evaluated compatible values like a glorified dating service, and scoured chat rooms and dance halls and grocery stores, he could rely on luck and time to weed out non viable candidates long before he had to worry about his clients getting impatient with his services. Only twice had he ever suggested the wrong person as being another’s soulmate, and he’d discovered that his clients were already so open to fate or chance or destiny or whatever, that they’d found their soulmates on their own — and he’d still been compensated.</p><p>All of his clients spoke of him with flowery praise, though he imagined that this was likely due to their ‘young love state of mind.’ Never one to turn down a compliment however, he accepted the accolades his small business was due. They were needed to balance debt, licensing and rental fees. Regardless, he’d been doing this for too long to think that he was good at his job. If any of his clients had a lick of sense or a week’s more patience, he suspected they would have found their soulmate without his interference, and saved themselves a couple grand while they were at it.</p><p>Maybe he wouldn’t have felt so jaded to the whole process if he knew who his own soulmate was. Facing daily reminders at work, and monthly inquiries from well-intentioned parents, that he’d yet to find his soulmate took the wind out of his sails, and made his achievements feel shallow and laughable.</p><p>He had no desire to find his soulmate. He would rather soulmates exist only as something he could work on, at a distance with a critical eye, and not be a hazard, a minefield, threatening the life he and his boyfriend had built together.</p><p>“I feel like I could’ve been searching forever. You’re such a lifesaver.”</p><p>Claude’s smile felt stiff on his face, but it was so practiced that he doubted his client would even have noticed if they were paying attention. Instead, their eyes were glassy, hardly looking at him, their love-struck mind up in the clouds, as they settled the last payment towards his services.</p><p>“It’s … it’s what I do,” Claude said lamely, stretching that same smile a little too far. <em>‘It’s what the universe does, I just take credit.’</em></p><p>Sylvain was taking to his feet across from Claude’s desk, extending a hand out towards him.</p><p>“I can’t even begin to—”</p><p>“I know,” Claude assured him, clasping his hand firmly. “It’s fine.” He released him. “Congratulations. I hope you have many happy years ahead of you.”</p><p>“Thank you,” Sylvain insisted. Those were the only words Claude had been able to wrench from his mouth for the first seven minutes of their meeting, at least now if he were going to continue repeating them, it might be elsewhere, as he was collecting his jacket. “I’ll be sure to recommend you to anyone feeling even a smidgeon as bad I did.”</p><p>“Thanks,” Claude answered informally, if only to keep from parrotting Sylvain with yet another ‘thank you’ uttered in his office space.</p><p>He hovered by the window from where he could see Felix leaning on the side of his old beat up Buick, enjoying the last of the good weather with autumn racing past. He was staring at the sky, whether in thought or at peace, it was hard to guess, but whichever it was hardly mattered when Sylvain caught his attention from the entrance of the building. Though Felix’s face brightened only with a half smile towards his soulmate, Claude was versed enough now with microexpressions to see that for what it was: joy, and relief, and excitement. Felix turned his attention down towards his feet as Sylvain stepped up in front of him, blocking Claude’s view of their reunion. He might’ve turned away then, if not for a cloud passing overhead, bringing attention to the unmistakable red glow of the soulmark on the back of Sylvain’s right hand as he brought it up to caress across Felix’s cheek and bent to meet his forehead in a kiss.</p><p>With a sigh, Claude leaned forward on his elbows, resting on the windowsill, willing away the two men affectionately. Sylvain was adjusting a scarf around Felix’s neck one moment, and then moving his hands back up to the sides of his face the next, until Felix wiggled out of his embrace and made his way to the driver’s seat. <em>‘Thank goodness. Go. Have fun.’</em></p><p>As they drove off, Claude opened the window to a fresh breeze, relieved by the chill air. He knew Hilda had yet at least one more client for him to meet with today and the brisk shock that came with the promise of winter steeled Claude for dealing with someone on the opposite end of that spectrum: depressed, desperate, lonely.</p><p>Rocking his head from side to side in a soft stretch, Claude was all smiles again as he walked from his office into the main reception area. Prepared to be more welcoming and comforting, cheerily he asked Hilda who was typing at something on her computer, “Who’s next, Hilda?”</p><p>With a little gasp, she stilled her hands and scrunched her brow at Claude, before wordlessly pointing across the room, where only one person sat in the waiting area.</p><p>Claude felt his smile slip from professional to relaxed as he strode over to where Lorenz stood, wrapping an arm around his shoulders before Lorenz could reach his full height as he laughed, “You know you don’t have to book my time.”</p><p>After the day he’d had, Claude felt his heart wrench at the sight of his boyfriend. Five years ago, so many of their mutual friends had started finding their soulmates. Lorenz had not, and the comfort Claude had offered then had quickly spiraled into affection, and dating, and now … if Claude could wash the soulmark from his body to trace Lorenz’s design on his wrist himself, he would have.</p><p>With a gentle tug Claude pulled them together to leave a casual kiss, an affectionate greeting, on Lorenz’s gentle mouth.</p><p>Lorenz licked his lips. He hadn’t anticipated starting this conversation until they were alone in Claude’s office, but still he admitted, “I <em>am</em> here on business.”</p><p>The confusion in Claude’s eyes was striking, and Lorenz had to close his eyes to shield himself from the worst of it.</p><p>“What?” Claude hissed, adjusting his stance so that he could grab Lorenz by the arm and pull him into his office, not sparing a glance at Hilda, who had gone back to trying to occupy herself with her computer.</p><p>When the door closed behind him, Lorenz sighed, willing himself to stand firm in the wake of … everything. He walked past Claude to his desk, pulling a manila folder from a tote bag and leaving it on the surface. His fingers were stiff on the paperwork as he declared, “I want to hire you.”</p><p>Claude swallowed as his confusion started to find itself wrought with anger. Lorenz would have told him if he’d wanted to find his soulmate. They’d been together too long, they were too honest with each other. He would have asked Claude if he was comfortable with hiring someone else because he would know that this would be asking too much. He wouldn’t do this.</p><p>“This is a joke,” Claude said, his tone less firm than he’d anticipated, his left hand jittering as he moved to wrap his stable, right hand around Lorenz’s wrist. “You’re joking.”</p><p>“I’m not—” Lorenz began, cutting himself off when Claude snapped away from him, rolling his rapidly blinking eyes, throwing his hands up in exasperation. “Claude,” Lorenz begged, though he knew he was hardly within his rights to demand a moment of discussion, a chance at explanation.</p><p>Still facing away from Lorenz, Claude gestured with his right hand again before wrapping his arms around himself.</p><p>“I need to know.”</p><p>“Get out.”</p><p>Whether or not Lorenz had finished his statement about what it was that he’d needed to know, Claude was finished listening. He stiffened as Lorenz walked up behind him, could feel where his hands hesitated inches from resting on his shoulder, touching his side.</p><p>“I’m going,” Lorenz agreed, small and broken, and Claude could only think, <em>‘How dare you.’</em></p><p>“I’m going home,” Lorenz repeated, clarified. At the closed door he squeezed the handle so that it rattled. “Come talk to me when you’re ready.”</p><p>Hearing the door click behind Lorenz, Claude waited three heartbreaking seconds before moving to lock it and moving to close the blinds. When he realized there was no way he would drop them in time if Lorenz just walked out the front door, Claude succumbed to the pit in his stomach and let it drag him to the floor. He sat curled up beneath the window frame, out of sight and cried, because … <em>‘What the fuck was that?’</em></p><p>He thought of Lorenz kissing him this morning, yesterday morning - for how many mornings had he been building himself up to do this? They hadn’t spoken about soulmates in so long, and maybe, in a relationship like theirs, that was unhealthy, but even without that … Lorenz hadn’t given him any signs that things had changed, that he was any less happy than they had been. They weren’t slow to laugh or to share, to whine about work or tease at each other, and they weren’t exactly lacking when it came to sexual satisfaction. Claude kicked at the chair at his desk, wracking his brain for some semblance of an explanation, of a motive, for Lorenz’s betrayal.</p><p>Four tiny raps at the door announced Hilda before she called out, “Claude? Are you alright? Do you need anything?”</p><p>He scoffed, standing, looking at his phone. He’d managed to spend a half hour on the floor.</p><p>“I’m fine, Hilda.”</p><p>“Lorenz seemed really upset. He wouldn’t tell me what was going on. You don’t have to either, but … feel free to call me, okay? No matter the time.” She waited a few seconds before bumping up against the door, Claude could picture her lounging, her pink hair bunching up around her head. “But if you tell me you’re fine, then I’m going to head out. Okay?”</p><p>“Good night, Hilda.”</p><p>“Good night.”</p><p>Claude stretched his arms, extending his crossed fingers out in front of himself. Moving now to make quick work of the blinds. The room still felt too loud, too familiar, like the work of the day, when Claude felt wrecked. His left eyelid fluttered and he rubbed at it to try and stave off more tears as he turned on the lamp on his desk.</p><p>With the overhead lights turned off, Claude sighed, feeling less exposed in the dim light, even alone.</p><p>He made his way to his desk, sitting at it twice, finding himself pulling the folder closer and sliding it away from himself, pacing the room. The third time he took his seat though, Claude had steeled himself at least enough to have to face his curiosity over his fear. He opened the folder, and promptly closed it again.</p><p>“Motherfuck—”</p><p>
<em>‘Of course — of fucking course — Lorenz included a title page.’</em>
</p><p>Claude gave his new clients a list of information he wanted from them when he gave them papers to sign giving him permission to inject himself into their personal affairs. The items that were mandatory were usually just in a crumpled pile of half folded papers stapled together, but there were a list of optional items that Hilda had tailored to try and make their lives easier. The last item on this list was included as a joke. A title page.</p><p>Claude couldn’t even imagine what else waited inside the folder, how obligated Lorenz felt to be thorough, even as familiar as Claude would be with the subject matter. The bold black lettering inside the folder taunted Claude after his abrupt reaction earlier. He held his forehead again, failing to suppress another sob as he let his hand slide down his face, holding himself across the mouth as he dared to open the folder a second time, and face those unfeeling words:</p><p>
  <b>Find the Soulmate of Claude von Riegan</b>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Comfort Me Too (Claude x Lorenz)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em> ‘Shit. Shit. Shit shit shit.’ </em>
</p><p>Claude scratched at his cheeks, mussing and straightening his beard. He realized that he really hadn’t let Lorenz say anything as soon as he’d heard those words. ‘I want to hire you.’</p><p>Lorenz wouldn’t blame him … but Claude could blame himself. This was a different sort of insult all its own, one that Lorenz had probably been ready to discuss.</p><p>
  <em> ‘Shit.’ </em>
</p><p>Despite all of the possible connotations that this request of Lorenz’s had, Claude at least felt satisfied that he had been right in assuming that the alternative had not been possible. Lorenz was not hiring him to look for his soulmate.</p><p>He flipped through the folder, but found that he wasn’t registering almost anything on the pages. Too occupied now with the truth: if he did know Lorenz as well as he thought he did, then he could figure out what his motivation had been.</p><p>When Claude came across a personal check from Lorenz, paperclipped to a consent to disclosure form, Claude clenched his fists in frustration.</p><p>
  <em> ‘Focus. Pick a task.’ </em>
</p><p>With a thoughtful twitch of his shoulder, Claude promptly shred the check into pieces. If he were going to extract payment from his boyfriend for this mental anguish, it would not be in the form of currency.</p><p>He opened a drawer on his desk and pulled out a fidget spinner. What had started as a joke had quickly turned into a habit, and he occupied his hands as he zoned in on reading through the information. He could come to conclusions once he had processed even the smallest hints left between these pages.</p><p>In the middle of the file was a list of names, three columns long. Impossible candidates to being Claude’s soulmate. Claude dripped a finger down the list, alphabetized by last name, wondering if he would find, what he knew he would find.</p><p>
  <b>Gloucester, Lorenz H.</b>
</p><p>
  <em> ‘Fucking asshole.’ </em>
</p><p>They knew they weren’t soulmates. They <b>knew</b> they weren’t soulmates. Claude swallowed, realizing how dry his mouth was, as he tried to reconcile why Lorenz would feel the need to include <em> this </em> in the documents. He found himself hurtling towards an uncomfortable conclusion, one that seemed unlikely, but, considering the strange nature of being faced with the problem of being hired to search for your own soulmate, it hardly seemed impossible.</p><p>Claude closed the folder, and rushed home.</p><p> </p><p>Though he swung the door to his and Lorenz’s apartment open, the silence inside was stifling, and Claude couldn’t bring himself to slam the door.</p><p>Looking into the living room, he could just barely see Lorenz at the dining room table. He found himself sluggish, and it was an effort to remove his shoes, as if lost in a miasma. He ducked into the open kitchen behind where Lorenz sat, surprised and unable to interpret the sight of dinner kept warm in closed pots on the stovetop. Reaching around a soft puff of steam, Claude turned the relevant dials from their lowest settings into off positions, before walking up behind Lorenz.</p><p>Purple hair fluttered as Lorenz’s head bounced as if he were going to turn to look at Claude, but the movement stopped short.</p><p>Claude moved to sit next to him, keeping his hands in his lap, ready to kick his chair from under him, to run, as he asked, “Was this your way of telling me you found your soulmate?”</p><p>Lorenz made a choked noise. He looked at Claude with such incredulity, his gaping mouth closed firm until he was clenching his jaw, squinting and looking aside as he insisted, transparent in his honesty, “No.”</p><p>Claude wanted to feel relieved, but guilt and frustration manifested instead. His face crumbled as he asked at a whisper, “Then why would you do this?”</p><p>Lanky and awkward, weary and emotionally exhausted, Lorenz leaned forward on his elbows on the table, crossing his arms at the wrists with an amused huff, holding the front of his shoulders. Relaxed, compared to his previous position, but still closed off as he answered, “You’re a romantic.”</p><p>He was trying for venomous, but Claude was certain there was too much amusement in his expression, too much fondness in his voice. “That’s rich, coming from you.”</p><p>Lorenz even had a small smile now, trailing the long fingers on his right hand up and down the upper part of his left arm, pretzeled around as he was.</p><p>“I wear it on my sleeve,” he agreed. “You wear it on your heart. I love that about you.” Lorenz could feel his heartbeat in his throat, suffocating him. “I would live and die for you … but that’s obviously not enough.”</p><p>Claude hated when the correct solution was the simplest one. “Shut up,” he warned, green eyes imploring Lorenz to abandon that line of thinking.</p><p>“There’s obviously something I’m not giving you.”</p><p>His words left Claude with only one conclusion, far different than earlier, and much more likely: Lorenz just wanted him to find his soulmate. He thought Claude must be unhappy or … not at peak happiness or whatever it was the soulmate propaganda entailed. They were supposed to be past this, from years ago. They knew they were happy, and that they may or may not find their soulmates. Claude squinted, raking his fingernails across the tops of his thighs, the material of his pants unyielding if he wanted something to crumple between his hands.</p><p>“That can’t be how it works,” Claude nearly sobbed, but managed to hold himself together as he reopened his eyes to Lorenz, who despite everything was maintaining the same patient, relatively calm expression. “I love you,” he insisted. “I can’t... Don’t make me do this.”</p><p>Claude’s broken declaration of love had pulled Lorenz from his seat. He was standing, moving to stand next to Claude on his side of the table, running gentle hands down the side of his face and back through his hair. He tried for praise, smiling even as his eyes started to shimmer with the threat of tears as he tried to justify his request by way of Claude’s very nature.</p><p>“I know you’re curious. You’re endlessly curious.”</p><p>“Lorenz,” Claude begged, turning sideways in his seat, bringing his hands up to Lorenz’s wrists, even as Lorenz slipped a hand under his chin and held his attention.</p><p>“I need you to look for them,” he’d decided, and no amount of begging would dissuade him, “and then we can decide what this is between us.”</p><p>Claude took to his feet, forcing Lorenz to take a step back because of simple proximity.</p><p>“What this is,” Claude started, confusion in his tone again making way for certainty, emphasis, “is <em> everything </em> to me.”</p><p>Despite being initially startled by Claude’s movements, Lorenz softened at his words, and having discovered that Claude wasn’t about to shy away, he brought his hands up to Claude’s waist, pulling him closer with one arm and then the other so that their hips rocked together softly. “And me,” he promised. “I love you.”</p><p>The assurance went straight through Claude like a lightning bolt. When he overcame his relief, he scrambled in gripping at Lorenz’s upper back, pulling him down to where they could share a kiss, open mouthed and angry. <em> ‘If you love me, then care for me.’ </em> Lorenz hissed as Claude bit unnecessarily hard on his lower lip, and Claude grunted in some sort of dismissal. <em> ‘If you love me, then don’t make me cry.’ </em> One of Lorenz’s hands had found the base of Claude’s scalp, and Claude wondered if Lorenz would yank him away, but found he was unsurprised when Lorenz crushed them closer, biting him too, if done with more care. <em> ‘If you love me, then let me love you.’ </em></p><p>Things continued to spiral from there. Layers shed, bodies bounced down the hallway as teeth and tongues found necks and jaws and soulmarks, as Claude wrestled them to the bedroom.</p><p>They were accustomed to comfort sex, bitter as they could be. It was how they’d started their relationship after all. However, never before had the comfort stemmed from hurting each other. Usually their barbs were directed elsewhere, and arguments (if they could even be called that) shared between the two of them were short, trivial things, easily forgotten long before ending up contorted in intimacy.</p><p>Lorenz was pinned to the doorframe of their bedroom, slouching as he gasped and sighed over Claude’s back; caring hands tracing beauty marks on brown skin. Claude was busy sucking a hickey just below his right clavicle, distorting his soulmark as much as physiology would allow. Lorenz was used to it, they were both always doing shit like this. When Claude was finished worrying at the skin, he was laving at the mark with his tongue, soothing in a way that wasn’t quite apologetic.</p><p>“Claude,” Lorenz whined, rocking his hard on into the firm hand sliding up between his thighs.</p><p>With a squeeze to that satisfying, solid warmth, Claude leaned away from Lorenz’s torso so that he could look him in the eyes. With a smirk and a scoff, Claude inched up to whisper across Lorenz’s lips, “I need you to fuck me now.”</p><p>Lorenz was tangling a hand in Claude’s curls, nodding into the kiss that followed. Claude’s right hand rested on the left side of Lorenz’s chest, and Lorenz moved his left hand up to tangle with Claude’s fingers, appreciating that his boyfriend still offered him this tender act despite all he’d been through this evening.</p><p>His heart hammered faster as he struggled to pull away from Claude, jerking his head towards the bed to direct him there. With a mournful swallow, Lorenz popped the button on his pants and stepped out of them as he followed. His mind racing even as he crawled over Claude, <em> ‘This isn’t helping him.’ </em> Even as he kissed him again, <em> ‘You don’t deserve his forgiveness.’ </em> Even as he ran his fingers through the hair on Claude’s chest, <em> ‘This isn’t for you. You’re stealing his life.’ </em> Even as he stripped him of the last of his clothing, <em> ‘You’re stealing his happiness. Someone else is worthy of him.’ </em></p><p>“Please,” Claude whimpered.</p><p>Lorenz opened his mouth to answer, and promptly closed it again, smiling instead as he nodded and reached over to the bedside table, retrieving the pump bottle of lubrication. He stiffened as Claude traced a single finger down the side of his ribs, shivering from surprise and pleasure. With a softer smile Lorenz took hold of Claude’s left hand in his right, extending his arm so that he could kiss the soulmark on the inside of his wrist, keeping eye contact with him as he did so. <em> ‘You’re not his soulmate.’ </em></p><p>Lorenz let Claude’s arm fold back in towards himself as he followed the movement to once again lay with his lover. He kissed the inside of Claude’s elbow, the side of his stomach, the edge of his hip, knowing that this wasn’t what Claude had asked for. He ran his teeth over the top of Claude’s thigh, and went back to busying his hands.</p><p>After swallowing, Claude reached out to take his legs in hand, but he barely had a moment to adjust his positioning before Lorenz was rubbing a slick thumb back and forth over his perineum, kissing and nipping at the inside of his thighs. At the stuttered breath Claude gasped out, Lorenz leaned away to pay more attentive attention, and massaged lube around Claude’s rim, before pressing in with one finger.</p><p>“Put your mouth on me again,” Claude gasped.</p><p>Lorenz hummed, relieved. He rocked his hand back and forth. “Anywhere in particular?”</p><p>“Lorenz.” A rebuke, but far less harsh or convincing than Claude’s earlier upset.</p><p>With some more adjustments, Lorenz wrapped his left arm around Claude’s right leg, and shifted so that he could lick slow and steady up the base of Claude’s cock while still fingering him. Claude was able to release his legs, sufficiently propped up by Lorenz’s pulsing grip, letting his left leg hang open while he sighed and leaned back into the pillows. Bracing one hand against the headboard, a series of metal bars, Claude rocked himself into the stimulation; the soft slide of Lorenz’s hair on his pelvis, the wet friction of his mouth on his balls, the oscillating pressure of two fingertips.</p><p>“Oh… Ah-ha!”</p><p>And Lorenz was groaning in time with Claude, a pleased and intimate rumble against delicate skin; deliberate in indulging his lover. He tightened his grip on Claude’s thigh and tried for a moment to capture his cock in his mouth, but the angle wasn’t quite right, and suction and strokes of his tongue weren’t accomplishing more than torturing both of them.</p><p>He let up on Claude as he asked, maybe a little desperately, “Help me with this.”</p><p>They ended up dislodging entirely, stacking more pillows under Claude, resettling, letting Claude angle himself into Lorenz’s waiting mouth. “Fuck.”</p><p>Claude’s back was arching, stomach flexing, caution and discipline holding his pelvis in place through Lorenz’s ministrations, and all Lorenz could think about was that the only thing that made it worth it to be unable to watch Claude come apart from ecstasy, was being the perpetrator of his pleasure. He relished the broken, babbling praise that Claude graced him with, satisfied that even if it were a result of habit rather than an intentional reward, that it stemmed from sensual bliss that he still had the honor of guiding.</p><p>Though Lorenz doubted that even if he were deaf that he could be ignorant to how Claude’s whole body expressed his desire. One hand thrown lazily across his forehead from where he’d abandoned the headboard, Claude was finally able to sway his pelvis into any particularly titillating curl of Lorenz’s fingers, as lube and practice made relatively quick work of their coordinated friction. A long keening noise reverberated from deep in Claude’s chest as Lorenz let his tongue flatten and swell in his mouth against the head of Claude’s dripping cock, and he smiled as the energy of the room started to build again.</p><p>Claude was pent up, taut, unable even to rut as he was when Lorenz swallowed him whole. Due to Claude’s size however, focusing on this suction without the use of his hands, meant that the pace was slow and not as stirring as Lorenz had intended. As such, he only bothered repeating the motion three times before abandoning depth for speed. Lorenz let himself bob with obscene wet noises along half of Claude’s cock, the adjustment allowing him to more mindlessly synchronize his mouth and fingers.</p><p>“Lorenz. Fuck, that’s good. <b> <em>Shit.</em> </b>”</p><p>As Claude groaned and reached out — with one hand to grab hold of the base of his cock for support and satisfaction, and with another to lock a fist in Lorenz’s hair — Lorenz stilled his hand but for his fingertips, vibrating a quick, firm pressure against Claude’s prostate.</p><p>Lorenz sucked only a second longer, not wanting to tip Claude over the edge in case that spoiled his mood, made him too uncomfortable, overstimulated. He kept up his ministrations otherwise, able to admire the scene in front of him without worry of Claude feeling one way or another about his hungry eyes and fucked-out appearance, because Claude was completely out of it, reduced to a whining state of need. His hair would surely have tangles, head tilted to his shoulder, the steady back and forth of his nodding and aftershocks knotting his curls into finer and finer twists. Only a single word fell from his lips.</p><p>“Oh, please. Please. Please-<em>pleasepleasepleaseplease</em>.”</p><p>The noise that followed was nothing short of a bark. A short, high-pitched grunt of disappointment that followed Lorenz removing his fingers. Even the bed objected loudly on Claude’s behalf as he threw himself back into it, lurching the pair of men closer together. Claude’s eyes flashed from frustration and turmoil to a different kind of desperation rather quickly as his senses returned to him. Lorenz looked much the same as he ever did in moments like this, and that was assuring in a way that extended beyond sexual.</p><p>Not that there wasn’t a sexual gratification to be stolen from the flush of his skin, the tight set of his neck that tensed with each shaking breath, the deep pink stain where his pale mouth was strained from use. Claude sat up to crash against Lorenz in more angry and urgent kisses. Combing his cloying hands frantically across Lorenz’s face, jaw, neck, chest, and then lower, pulsing a twisting grip around the head of Lorenz’s solid erection.</p><p>“Do you—?” Lorenz cut off in a moan as Claude rocked himself forward, hooking his elbow around the back of Lorenz’s neck and matching a squeeze on his shaft with a bite on his neck. “Do you want me to grab a condom?”</p><p>The question was a courtesy, an offer to simplify clean up, that Lorenz could have foreseen the answer to in this specific instance from a mile away, but he hadn’t anticipated the quiver in Claude’s voice.</p><p>“Not tonight.”</p><p>Lorenz rest his head against Claude’s as he nodded, his thumbs running small circles on Claude’s inner thighs, in what he hoped was a comforting way. Claude traced his tongue up the side of Lorenz’s neck until he felt the barest brush of his facial hair, and then bobbed back and forth so that he could slide his tongue back into Lorenz’s mouth for a little while longer.</p><p>“Lay back,” Lorenz whispered in the gasps between kisses. “Sweetheart.”</p><p>As Claude did so, he felt soft and pliant. He imagined it was ridiculous to feel soothed by the sight of Lorenz biting his lips as he coated his cock in lube, but his affection for the man combined with his earlier fears of ... abandonment, meant that the intimacy hit Claude in a deeply personal way. He started to orient himself as Lorenz leaned forward, and felt more of that deep aching warmth in his chest as Lorenz's hands slid up the back of his thighs, to just below his knees, folding him with care.</p><p>Then one of those guiding hands was being taken away, to instead steady Lorenz's glorious cock. Claude hummed pleased little noises, licking his lips, swallowing, as Lorenz slipped the head of his dick in and out in three shallow movements before reaching for the lube again.</p><p>"Oh, Claude ..." Lorenz groaned, measuring his breathing as he slowly allowed himself to sink into his lover more seriously this time, in a slow and measured act. Claude whined in agreement, and they both gave themselves over to the sensations for a few blissful little moments.</p><p>"Alright," Lorenz said finally, snapping his hips in one sharp, eager motion, before rolling back and angling himself up towards Claude's prostate. Claude's expression changed near instantly, jaw tight, eyebrows knit, lips slack, and Lorenz failed to fight off a smile as he canted into Claude faster, and <em> faster</em>, and <b>harder</b>.</p><p>Claude's eyes followed the drops of sweat curling down the mottled expanse of Lorenz's pale skin until his eyes were fluttering closed and he was unable to focus on anything other than being railed into the mattress. Claude knew his voice was pouring out of him, filling the room, and distantly, he could hear Lorenz answering him, cursing out broken bits of praise as he panted and adjusted their tempo.</p><p>"This is suuuuuuch a good angle," Claude purred, at a volume far lower than his previous moaning, opening his eyes, now brimmed with tears, but whether from pleasure or simply because everything started to crash all over him again ... "Fuck."</p><p>"Claude?" Lorenz's face fell in concern, stopping his movements.</p><p>"I love you," and the admission was raw, and honest, even if the words were familiar.</p><p>Claude covered his mouth with a hand, readying himself to have to face a conversation for his emotional state, but instead his eyes blew wide as Lorenz shifted his hips again, forcing Claude’s knees back towards his chest, as he half laughed, "I love you too."</p><p>Claude moved his hand from his own face to reach out to Lorenz, finding his fingers on his thigh.</p><p>"I haven't stopped," Lorenz assured him, speeding them again, slowly, letting Claude roll into it. "I could never stop. How could I?"</p><p>And Lorenz found that angle again and Claude was keening, and Lorenz was humming his way into three little shocked exclamations. "<em>Ha</em>…” he ended up sighing. “That feels good, does it darling?"</p><p>He pulled his left hand from Claude's touch and ran his tongue over his palm, and Claude couldn't help a smile, knowing how Lorenz bristled at that sensation.</p><p>"I bet I can make it feel better," Lorenz promised, regardless, grasping Claude's erection with a slick hand. His own expression was wildly inconsistent, as he held fast against the waves of euphoria threatening to bring him to orgasm.</p><p>Claude whimpered happily, biting on his lower lip. With a few jerky nods at his partner, he ran his hands up and down the back of his calves, watching Lorenz’s pleasure overcome him.</p><p>Lorenz was still babbling, "There's no need for sadness. I'm still here with you. Come on."</p><p>Purple hair frizzy and body sweat-slicked and yearning, Lorenz surged forward, his hands finding the bed around Claude’s shoulders. Claude expressed his approval of the new angle with a moan and wrapped a leg up around that lean waistline, laying his hands open and loose along his lover’s upper back, caressing Lorenz as a result of friction.</p><p>Lorenz's last sentence, gasped into Claude's ear sounded enough like, 'Cum for me,' that this was all Claude could do ... but, even as Claude reached his peak, groaning and clenching around Lorenz so that his mind and body were lost in the sensation of white heat, he had to wonder if it hadn't also sounded exactly like, 'Comfort me too.'</p><p> </p><p>The indulgence of being full of his lover was short lived, even shorter than usual, and Claude gasped as he let Lorenz slip away from him, before they each took turns in the bathroom in clean up.</p><p>Claude was reaching out to Lorenz as he reseated himself on the bed. Lorenz smiled as he plucked a long purple hair from the shoulder of Claude's old tee shirt, when he opened his mouth to speak, Claude raced to interrupt him.</p><p>"Lorenz."</p><p>If there were an easier way to grant Claude the many little satisfactions of a soulmate, or at least to assure him that Lorenz had made peace with what he was asking (as much as he could), then Lorenz would have jumped at the chance. As it stood, it seemed he would have to suffer Claude's disquiet, at least as long as it might take him to succumb to curiosity and take up Lorenz on his offer. Claude shifted on the bed, enveloping his boyfriend in a careful embrace despite still lying on his side, his expression soft and covetous.</p><p>"You're deserving of love too," Claude said quietly, earnest in a way that set them both to blushing.</p><p>Lorenz smiled fondly, sliding a gentle hand along Claude's upper back. Unable to argue with Claude in the circumstances, Lorenz conceded as much as his mind would allow. "Maybe."</p><p>"Not maybe," Claude insisted, unable to keep from running his middle, ring and pinky fingers back and forth across the line of hair on Lorenz's stomach. "You are."</p><p>Tickled, Lorenz moved one hand to link with Claude's, while the other slipped from Claude's back to his mess of hair, which was going to be a nightmare in the morning. Lorenz wore a bittersweet smile as he clarified, "Maybe not the love I want."</p><p>Claude was eager to jump at the opportunity to agree to the depth of his own emotion, for a release from what Lorenz had asked of him. "I don't have to—"</p><p>"I want you to," Lorenz said again, firm, squeezing Claude's hand. "Start work on it tomorrow."</p><p>Claude huffed. Fighting any more about this felt stupid. <em> 'Maybe this is just something I'll have to do from now on? Search every few months to satisfy him.' </em></p><p>"I ..." Claude drawled, before allowed himself to snicker once, "destroyed your check ... but I'll still need to pay Hilda."</p><p>Lorenz smiled, and it felt genuine. Claude shifted away as Lorenz moved to slide into him, struggling with the blankets. "We'll figure it out."</p><p>Claude fit himself around Lorenz, sighing into the hair on the back of his neck. "We always do."</p><p> </p><p>While Claude probably spent too many of the following hours thinking about exactly that, moments of emotional weakness, financial insecurity, general illness. He couldn’t help but feel a little mollified. He could handle looking for his soulmate, he could handle finding his soulmate, so long as they could figure it out.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. It's Nothing</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Hilda arrived at work, Claude was already in his office. He hadn't called or texted, and though that should have meant that all was well ... she couldn't help worrying.</p><p>They exchanged a curt greeting, and she slowly sunk into her desk as she watched him shuffle away in his office, organizing tiny stacks of paper.</p><p>Claude valued reliability, she knew, and so resolved herself to stick to work, at least for a little while. Gathering a few little colored folders from her desk, she took one deep breath while bent over in her seated position before approaching her friend.</p><p>"Are any of these printouts for our next clients?"</p><p>"Oh."</p><p>Hilda raised an eyebrow, Claude looked legitimately lost. It was fairly obvious that whatever he was working on had nothing to do with the work of the day. She laid her folders on his desk and went to flip through the paperwork as she asked softly, trying to sound casual, "So ... what happened yesterday?"</p><p>She returned her attention to Claude before she could really make sense of what she was looking at, more interested in his reaction than the distraction on his desk.</p><p>Claude opened his mouth, took a breath, tried again. "Lorenz hired me."</p><p>Hilda froze for a moment too, the words sounding wrong to her ears. Claude could see when recognition hit, as her pupils dilated and shrunk, her brow furrowing as she said, incredulous, "Wait. Seriously? Did ... did you accept? Did you break up? What—?"</p><p>Silence filled the room again as Claude raised his hands, letting his limbs stutter on their way back down to his sides before he could reply, "I <em> did </em> accept. We <em> didn't </em> break up. And now I have to find <em> my </em> soulmate."</p><p>With a step forward, Hilda repeated, her tone flat, "<em>Your </em> soulmate?"</p><p>"That's what he hired me to do," Claude answered with a nod.</p><p>"That's ..." she frowned, "bold." Curling her sideburns back behind her ears, Hilda sighed and looked around the scattering of papers with new purpose before asking, "Do you want me to—?"</p><p>"No," Claude interrupted, his hands fidgeting again so that he shoved one in a pocket. "I ... I need to start this on my own." He smiled, relieved when Hilda seemed to understand. "If you could just ... work on the other clients?" It was obvious saying this made him somehow even more uncomfortable, but Hilda was picking up her empty folders, already organizing some mental checklists.</p><p>"We do have three," she confirmed. "Two are aware they're waiting, but Dorothea Arnault is not. I'll put in some requests to some security companies and, you know, get started."</p><p>"Thank you," Claude said softly, as he eased himself into his seat.</p><p>Hilda took another moment to look at the work scattered around Claude, his selective organization obvious in his habits. Trying to lighten the mood, she bat him on the head with her folders, teasing, "It's too bad I'm not your soulmate." She turned to leave, winking at him over her shoulder, "I'd let you fuck Lorenz on weekends."</p><p>"Ha ha," Claude called after her, rolling his eyes only once she'd closed the door.</p><p> </p><p>His eye roll was fond. Hilda had been a partner to him in almost all things since they were about twelve years old, and being best friends with your soulmate was something most people simply had to discover after meeting them. Claude was sure it would have been even more rough on Lorenz if a year after losing Hilda, he'd have felt as though he were losing both of them, but it could've been fine ... if they had been soulmates ...<em> 'Maybe.' </em></p><p>Claude chuckled as a memory of those days, unrelated to his current task, floated through his mind, of resting on bleachers in a loud gymnasium. He, Lorenz, Hilda and Ignatz were waiting for Raphael's wrestling match in a regional final. Some other students had started calling out taunts and more usual tournament jeering, and he and Hilda had retaliated by shouting out unnecessary compliments to the athletes, and referees, embarrassing and scandalizing their companions.</p><p>He hadn't felt for Lorenz then as Hilda had, or at least, not in a way that he would have recognized.</p><p>High school sweethearts finding out they weren't soulmates wasn't uncommon. High school sweethearts still dating at twenty wasn't exactly commonplace either though. Even now, it hurt to think of Lorenz and Hilda, young and hopeful, wrapped in each others arms, watching the moon and the clocks as they waited for midnight to pass into her twentieth birthday, only to be met with ... nothing.</p><p>Hilda had broken up with Lorenz sometime over the next few days. Her reasoning had been as sound as it could be. If she 'settled' for love, if they wed, if she had children, and then had to choose between Lorenz, or a whole family, and pursuing her soulmate one day, she didn't want to resent him or let him down, depending on her decision.</p><p>Lorenz had come to Claude for comfort, which they'd both taken a little too far. Claude had expected Hilda to rage, scream and hate him, but the worst emotion Claude had faced from her had been confusion, and she'd been as comforting and supportive as she'd ever been. That she was still so comforting and supportive going on five years later, told Claude that the universe was full of shit.</p><p>The idea that a perfect stranger was going to echo his soul back to him, or whatever it was that the soulmate schlock promised young lovers, was unfathomable.</p><p>In truth, five years past, Claude hadn't been surprised when his soulmark hadn't reacted when Lorenz touched him. At the time it had felt like a decision, to be with him, rather than something limited by the confines of fate. What Claude wouldn't give for those confines now.</p><p>He reached across the desk to the list of names of people who were not his soulmate, and traced Lorenz's with a finger, noticing now that Hilda's name rest just beneath his. "Fuck."</p><p>
  <em> 'Fine. It isn't Lorenz, and it isn't Hilda. Or anyone else you've learned to trust over the years. It's fine. It's going to be fine.' </em>
</p><p>However, even with everyone he'd shared handshakes with and exchanges of currency, and other little social niceties, Claude couldn't stop thinking of his friends. People with whom he'd held hands through dental appointments, scary movies, games of 'Red Rover,' and a million other excuses and assurances. There seemed no avoiding that his soulmate would be a stranger, someone he couldn't prepare for.</p><p>For once he was glad to feel out of control of his job. If his other clients had been open and ready to meet their soulmates, Claude was the opposite, searching out of obligation and loyalty, rather than desire.</p><p> </p><p>Hilda was doing her best to separate herself from Claude's turmoil as she worked, letting soft music play from her computer while clattering away at emails. She was so close with some of her contacts now that after three professional messages, the conversations continued afterwards, about their work environment, the weather, and other casual humdrum. It would be interesting to know whether Ferdinand could tell how distracted she was, as Hilda avoided getting into Claude's personal business despite trying to communicate the strangeness of the atmosphere at her workplace this morning.</p><p>Then her phone rang. Not the office phone, but her cellphone, its pink case clattering as it vibrated off the base of her monitor onto the desk.</p><p>Hilda released a breath through her nose as she picked it up, answering the name that flashed on her screen, "Lorenz." Her grip tightened as she held off the impulse to scold him and ask what he was doing. "What is it?"</p><p>Elsewhere, Lorenz could hear her irritation, and was surprised that Hilda, often loud and passionate, wasn't just laying into him. There'd been no question in his mind that Claude would have told her what he'd asked of him. He rubbed his forehead as he asked, "Did he do it?"</p><p>Hilda sighed, relaxing into her chair and looking over at Claude's closed door as she conceded, "As far as I know, yes. He's working on finding his soulmate."</p><p>Lorenz had time to lick his lips and nod before Hilda asked, more kindly than he'd expected, "Are you sure you made the right decision?"</p><p>It caused him to cough, laugh, sob — some singular revealing noise escaped him at any rate.</p><p>"No, but, when am I ever."</p><p>Hilda leaned forward again, resting on her elbows. <em> 'I know the feeling.' </em> She wanted to be compassionate, but he'd hurt Claude, and in this, he'd hurt her too. Their break up, though years past, had felt entirely one-sided in so far as matters of soulmates were concerned. He was younger then, but she couldn't help but wonder why he'd let her be the bad guy. There was a bitter taste in her mouth, one that she felt didn't suit her at all, as she wondered why Lorenz hadn't been more considerate about her finding her soulmate, so that things might have ended with less tears on both sides.</p><p>"I'm sorry if I upset your work environment," Lorenz said finally.</p><p>Hilda steadied her tone. "I'm okay."</p><p>"Are you?" Lorenz asked, gentle and concerned. "We don't talk as much as we should." While Claude saw her at least five times a week, Lorenz hadn't made the effort for more than the occasional chat these past few months. "How have you been?"</p><p>Hilda smiled. "You know me," the attempt to sound cheery made her throat itch. "I could always use a nap." With a darker attempt at humor, she confessed, "The novelty of different dance partners is wearing thin."</p><p>Dating and hooking up were all well and good, but most of the time when people gathered at clubs, it wasn't even to dance or have a good time. People were always reaching out, too grabby for Hilda's liking. It was emotionally taxing, but she'd caved and started going to events that were specifically advertised as Soulmate Socials, where everyone was straightforward about just wanting to highfive and see whether by simply engaging with as many people as possible, they could find their soulmate.</p><p>Lorenz shuddered. "I don't know how you can stomach it." He adjusted the phone from one ear to the other. "You're so much stronger than me, Hilda."</p><p>Hilda let her eyebrows furrow in curiosity. "Do you think you'll be joining me ... if Claude finds—?"</p><p>"I can't," Lorenz said, sharp and quick. "Please, I'm at work," and suddenly Hilda could hear all of his repressed tears, his restrained heartache. "I can't think about that right now."</p><p>Her heart should have melted, she should have felt compassion, but his self-inflicted sadness only frustrated her again, and Hilda found herself whispering, "Do you know how jealous I've been of you? Do you have any idea what it's been like dancing around greedy and tactless partners who just want to touch my breasts before they go off in search of their next fuck? While I watch you and Claude build happiness in spite of the expectations of others; that you're just willing to risk on ... nothing."</p><p>Lorenz was speechless, and for too long.</p><p>"I'm glad you'll have your happy memories."</p><p>"Hilda, I—" But he was met with a click. <em> 'Shit.' </em></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> 'Shit.' </em>
</p><p>Leaving her phone on her desk, Hilda scurried out the front door as tears started blurring her vision.</p><p> </p><p>Claude heard the distant sound of the front door opening and closing, and waited for the sound of voices to breach his door. When none came, curiosity and a need for distraction pulled him from his office.</p><p>Claude's sharp eyes dashed around the room before he called out, "Hilda?"</p><p>Stepping more soundly into the room, Claude was able to catch sight of Hilda's pink hair where it swayed into view outside the front window. He knew she wasn't smoking, and wondered for a moment if she'd gone in search of privacy, fairly confident that he'd heard her talking on the phone not long ago. Claude quickly reconciled that maybe she had, but when Hilda stepped back in front of the glass door, he caught sight of her red and tear stained face and quickly went to meet her.</p><p>"Hilda?" Claude swallowed, letting the door swing closed, watching in case she pressed further away. "What's wrong?"</p><p>Seeing Claude was enough to rekindle Hilda's distress and she found herself sobbing again as she reached out to grab Claude by the shirt, and then push him away, pivoting herself further on one foot. "It's not fair."</p><p>Claude reached out, guiding her back towards him with gentle hands on her shoulders.</p><p>Hilda rest the side of her face against his chest as she vibrated from more sobs, "It isn't fair."</p><p>"I know," Claude said absently, not needing to, running his hands down her hair and across her back. "I know. It isn't fair."</p><p>Whether his assurances helped or only prolonged Hilda's suffering was lost on both of them, but Claude's warmth and confidence were comforting. He patiently waited as she eased in his arms, rocking her a little as the minutes dragged on.</p><p>When Hilda finally leaned away, Claude dared to ask, "Now ... What isn't fair?"</p><p>"I—" Hilda hesitated and Claude caught of how she was holding her right hand, her left thumb rubbing up and over where her soulmark sat at the base of her palm.</p><p>He shook his head quickly and squeezed her shoulders. "Nevermind. Hilda, why don't you go wash up and we'll go get lunch?"</p><p>She sobbed once more, but it came out as mostly a laugh and so Claude counted that a victory. Hilda nodded, her smile coming more easily to her as she flitted back into the office, setting the work line with a lunch message, before checking herself in a mirror and collecting her cell phone, wallet and keys.</p><p>It would be a short walk to the end of the block where, across the street, there was a cafe. Whether Claude wanted to discuss her outburst, his relationship or their work, Hilda felt relieved by his company. Composed, she returned to Claude a little brighter, eager to clear her head.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. I'm Not Lost</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The sun was high while Fae rotated some bouquets around in the display out front. The Natural Choice was a well-to-do flower shop, one where Fae hadn't expected to have been employed for so long, but as far as day jobs went, it was busy, physically active, engaging and generally fun. There were greenhouses both in the basement and in the back stocked beyond what the morning deliveries provided, and the variety of the flora was always a fascinating experience. Many of these flowers came from seeds halfway around the world, and travelled more than their recipients.</p><p>The Church of Seiros two blocks over provided most of the business for the shop, but other places of worship occasionally did reach out for weddings, funerals and similar events. However it was the little purchases that stuck with Fae, and so many of those came from clients leaving the legal offices across the street.</p><p>Soulmate Investigator had sounded like a ridiculous job as far as they were concerned, but that was around three years ago, by now they were accustomed to Claude and Hilda passing by, stopping in from time to time. Their clients though, were always very sweet, picking up a flower or twelve when they'd found their soulmate. They were memorable, and it was nice to think that Fae, in turn, was remembered, on the occasion that they'd return when they needed wedding flowers.</p><p>"If it isn't my favorite business partners," Fae greeted, kind and cordial, as Claude and Hilda approached, but Fae’s eyebrows raised and settled when they saw the state of them: the whites of Hilda's eyes soft and glossy from recent tears, and Claude's composure betraying his stress and sadness.</p><p>"Hi Fae," Hilda greeted.</p><p>Claude nodded to either of them, and then to one of the small tables outside the cafe next to the flower shop. "I'll get us lunch."</p><p>"Are you sure?" Hilda called after him, but he was already stepping away, nodding again.</p><p>Fae frowned as they sat across from Hilda. "Troublesome client?"</p><p>"Heh," Hilda scoffed. "No. I imagine we're both looking a little rough?" She ran the backs of her index fingers beneath her eyes, as if to stay tears and accommodate make up. Fae pouted sympathetically. "Claude's boyfriend — you remember Lorenz?" Hilda supplied with a wave of her hand, and Fae nodded. "Well he's hired us to look for Claude's soulmate." Fae's eyes blew wide, green and glassy. Hilda felt her own lashes flutter as she groaned, "I know."</p><p>Looking away and licking their lips, Fae recomposed themselves before offering Hilda a half smile. "Some color might make you feel better?"</p><p>Hilda raised her hands as Fae stood, a token protest. "Oh, no. You don't have to do that."</p><p>"It's no trouble," Fae laughed, carefully sliding three flowers out of a bouquet, returning to offer Hilda two pink tulips and a sprig of baby's breath. "Besides, it's always a treat to give a pretty girl some flowers, right?"</p><p>Fae's words took Hilda by surprise more than the gift and she raised a crooked finger to her lips as her smile slowly grew in the wake of the compliment. She nodded as she accepted the flowers, amused that her face would feel so flush again so soon after crying, and for such a different reason. "Thank you."</p><p>Hilda made a point to touch Fae's hands as she accepted the flowers, though they'd come in contact many times before over the past few years, Hilda was curious to note if or how Fae reacted. Her discovery was that Fae's smile widened, a little toothy, and their cheeks blushed softly, a dusting of pink.</p><p>Claude returned with drinks and sandwiches, and they enjoyed a simple lunch while Fae lamented the cool weather and bright sunlight making short work of any of their flower displays. They could tell that Claude and Hilda were relieved to have a distraction, and so went through a few mental loops while deciding whether to offer Claude flowers also, but when they were preparing to be on their way back to work, Fae leaned into the impulse.</p><p>"Oh, Claude!" they said, standing with the other two. "I gave Hilda some flowers, and want to treat you also."</p><p>He gave Hilda a look of confusion as Fae plucked some flowers from two different bouquets. Hilda shrugged, smiling. Claude's eyebrows fell, as he accepted two bright yellow marigolds and two stunted sprigs of delphinium.</p><p>"You'll be alright," Fae promised, reaching out to shake his hand.</p><p>"Thank you," Claude had thought to answer at more of a regular volume, but it came out as mostly a whisper.</p><p>"Good luck," Fae said to both of them, stepping back to ensure them space as they went on their way.</p><p> </p><p>When they arrived back to the office Claude stopped in the doorway before suggesting, "Why don't you take the rest of the day?"</p><p>Hilda's expression levelled him with her incredulity. "I'm not leaving you here alone."</p><p>"I'd survive," Claude laughed, though he felt embarrassingly seen by those determined eyes.</p><p>"No," Hilda said firmly. "Let me change the phone messaging, and then I'm going to help you." She pointed to his office.</p><p>"I ..." Claude started, hesitant, smiling when she tilted her head lower so that she could look even less impressed with him. "Okay."</p><p> </p><p>With the day ending, the street was aglow in orange and purple. The exterior displays of The Natural Choice brought brought in to obstruct the front window and Fae's work of sweeping the floor, when the door opened with the sound of a bell.</p><p>"Lorenz?" Fae greeted in surprise.</p><p>He stilled, surprised, blushing as he answered, "Fae."</p><p>"Claude and Hilda were here earlier," Fae said instantly, setting the broom aside.</p><p>"Oh?" Lorenz peeped looking around the room, as if there might be signs of them.</p><p>Fae chuckled, "Just for the coffee next door, I mean." They gave him a moment to breathe before folding their arms and declaring more transparently, "I heard from Hilda what a mess you've gotten yourself into." Lorenz opened his mouth, clearly on the verge of a self-defense and explanation, but Fae pressed on, "I think it's honorable, if a bit misguided."</p><p>"I'll take that as a compliment," Lorenz sighed, rubbing the side of his forehead for a moment.</p><p>"You should," Fae agreed. "What can I get for you?"</p><p>Lorenz's mouth and eyebrows twisted as he confessed, "A bouquet. Something apologetic."</p><p>Fae quickly moved to step behind the counter as they offered, "You like roses, if I remember?"</p><p>They had no doubt that they remembered. Even if he hadn't been a regular patron, roses were all Lorenz had ever purchased on his visits.</p><p>"I don't mean to be predictable," Lorenz pouted as he moved to the counter, fishing for his wallet. "I would defer to your experience."</p><p>Fae shook their head, picking out blooms. "Roses are smart," they insisted. "Classy," Lorenz frowned. "<em>Classic</em>," Fae amended. "What if we do ten white and two red, and some heather?"</p><p>When they turned back to Lorenz, their face fell to see that he'd left his belongings on the counter and was holding all of one side of his face in trembling fingers. A shaking breath escaped the man and Fae abandoned their task.</p><p>"Hey, come sit down," they said gently, guiding Lorenz with a hand on his back to where three chairs sat along a wall.</p><p>"I'm sorry," he hissed, a repressed sob.</p><p>"Don't be," Fae insisted, taking a seat next to him, wondering about taking their hand away before pressing down in a soft sawing motion.</p><p>Lorenz squinted harder, as if this might help his predicament as he started to cry. He didn't want to cry, not in Claude's company and certainly not out of it, in public. He had to wonder if he didn't deserve it. <em> 'I've hurt the people closest to me so much...' </em></p><p>Fae stayed in place a little longer. They knew Lorenz, but not well enough to judge or console, not beyond a steady hand. Still, they felt they could understand what he had meant to do by providing Claude the opportunity to find his soulmate. This was the way of things. His tears told them that he was sacrificing of himself, but a little too deeply.</p><p>
  <em> 'I wish I could take away your pain.' </em>
</p><p>Fae pulled away from Lorenz then, wondering from where that thought had arisen. It was one thing to empathize, but this was ... an emphatic love.</p><p>He leaned away to look at them, and Fae realized that maybe they'd pulled away too sharply. They quickly moved to grab a box of tissues on the counter, to offer them to Lorenz's lap.</p><p>Quickly plucking three from the box, Lorenz used two in an attempt to save some face. "That's very kind of you."</p><p>Fae smiled from where they placed the tissues back on the counter and opened their mouth to speak just as Dedue walked up from the basement.</p><p>"I think those daisies aren't going to make it after all," he began. "Oh!" Dedue stroked a large hand over his chin as he took in the scene in front of him. "Is everything alright out here?"</p><p>"Yeah," Fae answered quickly, smiling again. "Just ... finishing up a sale. I think?"</p><p>Lorenz coughed into his remaining tissue, held delicately in one hand as he blushed, making one last effort to settle himself before nodding. With a shrug, Dedue abandoned them to the back of the shop, and Fae set up the debit machine for Lorenz before returning to wrapping his flowers.</p><p>"Thank you," Lorenz said, rushing to pocket his wallet and keep hold of the tissues while reaching out for the bouquet.</p><p>Fae moved deliberately slowly, trying to relay some calm into their customer. He wasn't near as distraught as some funeral clients, or even forgotten-anniversary clients, but they didn't need him to trip into traffic just crossing the street because of some misplaced embarrassment.</p><p>Lorenz's fingers stuttered on Fae's wrist as he made to collect the bouquet, but they maintained their soothing expression, holding onto the flowers a little longer than necessary.</p><p>"Goodnight, Lorenz."</p><p> </p><p>When Lorenz arrived at Claude and Hilda's place of work, it had been officially closed for the past half hour, but he knew well that they actually worked two hours past the closing hour. Still, the door was locked when he arrived, and he braced himself to face Hilda when he knocked upon it.</p><p>"Hey there," she greeted softly, leaning against the door in a way that entirely fit the weary atmosphere surrounding her, and completely obstructing the entrance. "I'm sorry about earlier."</p><p>Lorenz body shook once in a silent laugh as he looked down to the floor before seeking her eyes. "Me too. Can I come in?"</p><p>Hilda seemed brighter even with just this reconciliation, and Lorenz worried that she might never want to address their earlier conversation. He did not want to neglect her friendship, but he wouldn't press the matter unless he was sure she was ready.</p><p>"Of course," Hilda insisted, stepping inside.</p><p>The tulips on Hilda's desk brought a tight lipped smile to Lorenz's features.</p><p>"Should I start saving to have Claude look for your soulmate next?" Lorenz asked, meaning to joke, more at his own expense than hers. Although he was relieved when she rolled her eyes and chuckled.</p><p>"You think I can't do this job better than he can?" Hilda winked.</p><p>"I heard that," Claude called as he left his office, good humor clear in his tone even before Lorenz could see him. Lorenz had been concerned that chance or circumstance would have meant that Claude might already have found his soulmate, but he couldn't imagine Claude acting like this if he had.</p><p>Their faces crinkled in disbelief, Lorenz's a little less genuine, but no less fond, as Claude offered him a handful of gold and purple flowers. As Lorenz tucked them into the wrist holding the base of his gift, he felt Claude sliding a hand around his waist and let himself lean into the embrace, kissing Claude's lips once, slowly, and then again in three quick pecks before Hilda cleared her throat in an exaggerated way.</p><p>Worried, Lorenz looked to her, but she was simply rolling her eyes and shaking her head with a resigned smile.</p><p>He turned back to Claude to ask, if only to say something, "So no luck today then?"</p><p>With a soft laugh, Claude plucked at the tape concealing the contents of the package in Lorenz's arm. <em> 'As if I'm not feeling lucky right now.' </em></p><p>"None." </p><p>Claude felt his whole heart melt at the sight of the roses, not quite aligned, but neatly shuffled, white except the two at the center, which were a deep red. His gaze wavered back to Lorenz's meek expression. "Oh, Lorenz."</p><p>Sneaking Claude's flowers into the open package, Lorenz wondered about confessing that the configuration was not exactly his idea, and that he should not receive credit for it, but convinced himself that these details were negligible as Claude resealed the tape.</p><p>"Let's go home." Claude threw his head over his shoulder, suddenly cheerful. He ordered with half a laugh, "Hilda go home."</p><p>She stuck out her tongue at him as she collected her things, hurrying on her way so that Claude could lock up and drive himself and Lorenz to their apartment.</p><p> </p><p>As Fae was preparing to leave, they noticed a small ovular shape on the counter, and worried they'd maybe mishandled some coinage. Stepping back to the counter however, they realized it was a small ovular stone, grey and marbled, like agate, with a groove on either side, though one side was tailored with a carved design of a rose. Smirking, they pocketed the thing, sure they knew how to get it home.</p>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. You're Right</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The twilight of morning was beautiful, but it always made Fae feel a little inebriated. They much preferred the twilight of evening. Although, they wouldn't deny feeling some relief that the more physically demanding deliveries of the day would arrive while they felt half present. Dedue wasn't faring much better, yawning and stretching in preparation of the labour as they made casual conversation on the front porch.</p><p>Two hours had passed by the time other businesses had started to open. Meanwhile Fae and Dedue were catching their breath inside, taking turns in the washroom to retie their hair and change their shirts. The interior of the shop was packed full of white and blue flowers, with ribbons and cardboard messages of consolation and wire frames brought down from the second floor, all ready to be woven into funeral displays. They needed to start working now to clear up some space in front of the counter in case any customers arrived.</p><p>They experienced the most unexpected delay however, when the person coordinating the funeral, a family friend of the deceased, arrived to ensure that the flowers and other materials were as ordered. This wasn't what had been unexpected, as he'd asked to do so at the time of his order, and called ahead again this morning before arriving. What was surprising was that when tall-blond-and-handsome had gone to shake Dedue's hand and be on his way, and the soulmark just barely visible in the neck of Dedue's tank top shimmered like metal catching light. Although Fae was only vaguely watching them as they laced flowers through metal wiring, they blanched as they realized what was happening.</p><p>Carefully, Dedue smoothed a large hand over his soulmate's wrist, hiking up the sleeve to reveal the bright blue design on the jut of his wrist bone.</p><p>"I ..." Dedue fumbled, looking up to the equally nervous face. "I'm sorry."</p><p>Fae couldn't see Dedue's expression from where they stood, but they could picture the way his face fell as he looked down at his shoes and made to pull away, but the grip of the other man held him in place, wrist shaking with tension.</p><p>"Don't apologize."</p><p>Dedue looked up again, running his free hand up over his forehead. "Mr Blaiddyd—"</p><p>"Please," his sharp blue eye looked around the room and Fae turned their gaze back to their hands and the flowers, blushing on Dedue’s behalf. "Call me Dimitri."</p><p>Fae pulled their hands away from their work in an exaggerated way as they said loudly, "I'm going to give you guys twenty minutes."</p><p>"We don't have time for—" Dedue was protesting as Fae squeezed between the men and the racks of potted plants.</p><p>"I'll get it done," Fae promised. "I have something I can do anyway."</p><p>"Thank you," Dimitri said, kind and soft, and probably blind to Fae even if he hadn't worn a patch over his right eye.</p><p>"No problem," Fae called through the open door, giving Dedue a wink before it swung closed.</p><p> </p><p>Claude was just about to open the main door to his office when Fae called out a greeting and bounced up beside him. He let his expression betray his confusion, as he assumed they should have been working.</p><p>"Fae?" he answered balancing a bag, a travel mug and the open door. "What are you doing here?"</p><p>Reaching into their pocket, they produced the small grey stone they'd found on their counter the day prior and said with a bit of uncertainty, "I don't know if he'd really need this, but—"</p><p>"Lorenz's worry stone," Claude confirmed, adjusting himself to hold the door with his foot so that he could accept the item.</p><p>Fae nodded. "He forgot it at the shop yesterday."</p><p>"I'll get it to him. Thank you."</p><p>"You're welcome." They allowed their cheer to wilt slightly as they asked, "Um, can I talk to you for a moment?"</p><p>"Inside?" Whether Claude was asking or suggesting, Fae could only guess, but they quickly slipped past his open posture.</p><p>"Sure."</p><p>They exchanged good mornings with Hilda, Fae flashing a peace sign as they followed Claude to his office. Scattering his things on his desk, Claude turned back to Fae with a smile. "So, what's up?"</p><p>Fae took a careful step forward, trailing their fingertips on Claude's desk.</p><p>"Hilda told me about what Lorenz asked you to do," they gave Claude a moment to adjust to the topic, but not long enough for him to speak, "and I wanted to tell you," Fae laughed once, sardonic, "that my parents were soulmates."</p><p>Claude was trying to interpret what Fae could be getting at. His own parents were soulmates too, as were those of many. "Uh-huh."</p><p>Fae frowned, stepping away from his desk again as he made to sit down.</p><p>"But they were only together for ... a little under three years."</p><p>That sent a chill up Claude's spine, and he sat up a little straighter. Fae took the seat across from him, leaning forward on an elbow.</p><p>"My mother died soon after I was born," Fae explained, gesturing with a hand. "So, despite having yet to find my soulmate, I have always wondered about the worth of it — the practicality."</p><p>Claude had his own reservations on the subject, but was uncertain about sharing them when someone was revealing so much personal information. He shrugged, and nodded once, in understanding.</p><p>Leaning away, Fae crossed their arms and looked out towards the window behind him for a moment. They steeled themselves for the possibility of being thrown out, before overstepping.</p><p>"You've had many happy years with Lorenz." The sentence made him bristle, but he didn't object, so Fae pressed on. "I know it isn't my place, but I strongly recommend that you think long and hard before looking for your soulmate, and about what you'd do if you did." They smiled weakly. "The universe is cruel, but we — by which I mean people, we don't have to be."</p><p>This was the first time Claude wondered whether what he was doing was cruel, rather than Lorenz. He wrung his wrists and sighed, realizing it might be inappropriate to take this time to contemplate his ego. Claude simply steered the conversation back.</p><p>"You haven't met your soulmate either?"</p><p>Fae squinted, but acquiesced, "No."</p><p>"No," Claude repeated, a sharpness to his gaze that Fae couldn't quite place.</p><p>They stood as they said clearly, "I couldn't afford your services, even if I wanted them."</p><p>Claude's mouth fell open, guilt making the hair on the back of his neck stand on end. He was not pitching his business. <em> 'Especially not to a friend. Fuck. Close your big fucking mouth.' </em></p><p>"Sorry," Claude said quickly, standing and extending a hand. "I mean, thank you."</p><p>"You're welcome," Fae laughed, which released a tightness in Claude's chest. "Good luck."</p><p>"I'll need it," Claude agreed, nodding as he sunk back into his desk.</p><p> </p><p>Hilda was leaned beside the open doorframe, holding a few different folders, when Fae left, meeting them with a blush and a smile, ducking inside Claude's office afterwards.</p><p>The rest of the day went on mostly as usual, Hilda having obtained a number of permits and permissions so that Claude was pressed for time and had to focus his attention on Dorothea Arnault's file, rather than his own. Lorenz hadn't set him a deadline, and he knew that Claude had other clients, Claude had to assume there would be no ill will for continuing his regular work.</p><p>Dorothea was a special case. A child star from about the age of twelve, she'd been wearing gloves since she was sixteen. Even if her soulmark wouldn't have reacted to the touch of other people at that age, displaying that she did not approve of physical contact from strangers had been important for her mental health.</p><p>With the list of possible candidates for her soulmate a mile long, Claude and Hilda had been more thorough in determining Dorothea's core values, to help compare those with the opinions of others. These things would include how and whether to raise children, whether your fellow man was deserving of shelter, nothing to do with tastes or styles, because that would set you up for failure, opposites attracting and all that.</p><p>It wasn't easy to make these determinations of others by literal grocery lists, hobbies and dating profiles, but it was a fair place to start until Claude could head out the following day to review mountains of security footage, and look for near misses with anyone who matched up with any leads Hilda and he came up with.</p><p>Suddenly, Claude dreaded the idea of having to review security footage of The Natural Choice on his own behalf.</p><p>"I have a new list for you," Hilda sang, after they'd been separated for two hours, each scrolling away at their computers in something that resembled work.</p><p>"Of?" Claude asked, eagerly pulling his attention from the monotony in front of him.</p><p>She tapped his monitor. "Check your email," she insisted, leaning on his desk. "You're getting lost."</p><p>"Sorry, Hilda."</p><p>Bobbing her head back and forth, she continued to explain anyway. "It's a list of everyone who's ever repaired something in this building, and anyone else I can think of you coming into contact with while working here, excluding clients — so you can check them off of being your soulmate."</p><p>Claude raised an eyebrow, and chuckled. "You thought I might have been missing a romance with the AC repairman?"</p><p>"You never know," Hilda drawled. Then she perked up, as if something had just occurred to her, but she was so transparent in it that Claude had to suppress further laughter. "Is it okay if I go get a coffee?"</p><p>Claude's eyes darted to the corner of his screen reflexively; two o'clock.</p><p>"The answer <em> is </em> yes," he confirmed, crossing his arms behind his head and leaning back, "but I do have to make sure — nothing of ours is broken, right?"</p><p>Hilda blushed. "No, nothing's broken." She hopped to her feet, earrings jingling. "Would you like something?"</p><p>Claude smiled more casually, leaning forward again. "No, thank you. I'll make some tea in a bit."</p><p>"I'll be back soon," she promised, abandoning him to lists of pseudo-celebrities and general contractors.</p><p> </p><p>Hilda walked into The Natural Choice with a coffee in either hand, which she was feeling apprehensive about when she noticed the clutter; flowers, soil and ribbons littering the floor.</p><p>"Hey Fae," she called to the person on the far side of the room. They looked like quite the gardener, in their overalls and a white tee shirt, both obviously stained with earth and greenery, and their long green hair pulled back in a half ponytail. It made Hilda more conscious of her own appearance as she set the drinks on the counter; causing her to straightened her blouse and skirt, and touch her own hair, in a tight bun at the back of her head.</p><p>"Hi Hilda," Fae answered, turning away from their project to a sink behind themselves where they washed their hands.</p><p>"Do you want coffee?"</p><p>"Oh, yes, please. Thank you."</p><p>Hilda watched as they drank, relieved when Fae hummed happily around the hazelnut beverage, before drinking of her own raspberry concoction.</p><p>With a vague gesture, Hilda stated, "Busy in here."</p><p>Fae nodded, smiling until they realized maybe they shouldn't be, as they explained, "Funeral tomorrow."</p><p>"Someone was well loved," Hilda observed, leaning up against the counter.</p><p>Fae eased into another swallow of their warm beverage, more comfortable now after hearing Hilda's interpretation of their work. "That's the goal, right?"</p><p>Hilda frowned. "And you're here alone?"</p><p>"Dedue met his soulmate," Fae said excitedly, and Hilda's eyes blew wide. "He's been gone about forty-five minutes now? I'm hoping he comes back to help, but if he doesn't, it isn't the end of the world. I convinced him to go."</p><p>Hilda was obviously flustered, leaning up and away from the counter as she babbled, "Well, I mean good for him, but ... I shouldn't interrupt, you have a lot on your hands already."</p><p>"No, no," Fae insisted, standing straight too, "I can take a few minutes." They flexed their tired fingers before pointing to the chairs on the side of the room opposite the racks of flowers. "Sit with me."</p><p>After a deep breath, Hilda nodded and moved to take the center chair, watching the set of Fae's shoulders and the swell of their forearms as they melted back into their seat, clearly more comfortable than the stool they were working on previously. As they shared a smile again, Fae looked down at the front pocket of their overalls and pulled out the white chrysanthemum which sat there, and tucked it behind Hilda's ear as they asked, "So, how are you?"</p><p>Hilda helped twist the blossom into her hair so that it would keep its place, happy for something else to fidget with. "I'm fine," she answered, taking another swallow of her drink.</p><p>With a compassionate tilt of their head, Fae rolled their eyes. "No. That's not a real answer." They considered Hilda, an appraising hand on their chin. "How's the office today?"</p><p>Hilda chuckled before assuring her companion, "It's better. Claude's better. I'm ..." Hilda hesitated, cocking her head, "the same." She had spoken to Fae previously of parties and outings in attempts to find her soulmate and so it wasn't out of place to admit, "Being hopeful every other night, only to be met with ... disappointment, is wearing me out."</p><p>"I'm sorry, Hilda," Fae consoled.</p><p>"Would you want to go out with me sometime?" Hilda blurted, she wrapped both hands tightly around her coffee cup, to avoid clasping a hand over her own mouth. She hadn't asked someone out in ... ever. This was what she had come here to do, but ... not quite like this.</p><p>Fae blushed, but they were nowhere near the deep shade of pink Hilda had flushed into. Even so, they needed to be sure, and so they asked, "To one of these ... Soulmate Socials?"</p><p>"No," Hilda peeped, nearly dropping her coffee. Her heart was racing.<em> 'Maybe coffee was a bad idea. Why do people </em> <b> <em>go out for coffee?</em> </b> <em> ' </em></p><p>"Just ... with me," she finished softly.</p><p>Fae's smile came as agonizingly slow as a sunrise, but so too was it just as welcome to Hilda's shattered nerves.</p><p>"I'd really like that," they assured her, their voice deep and earnest.</p><p>"Yeah?" Hilda asked, unsure why she would be surprised as her confidence started pouring back into her.</p><p>"Yeah," Fae confirmed, nodding, their eyes dancing as they seemed to sketch a portrait of Hilda's delight in their mind. "How about dinner, tomorrow night?"</p><p>"Sure," Hilda said quickly, even before really thinking about it, as her mind and heart sang. <em> 'This is different. This is different. This is different.' </em></p><p>Fae stood and reached behind the counter to grab a pen and a pad of sticky notes. They scribbled down their number; tracing over a seven deliberately so that there would be no mistaking it for a one, before handing it to Hilda.</p><p>"Here. I hope you'll text me."</p><p>Hilda pulled out her phone and stuck the note to her screen. "Absolutely."</p><p>"Even," Fae pressed, pointing for emphasis, "if you find your soulmate in the meantime."</p><p>A laugh bubbled out of Hilda which didn't just bounce her shoulders, but her whole body in her seat. "Sure thing. That would be just my luck."</p><p>"Don't say that like it's a bad thing," Fae whined.</p><p>The door opened then, and a woman in a smart suit with a navy blue bob stepped inside. Fae's posture changed as they switched into customer service mode.</p><p>"Hello, welcome to The Natural Choice. You can call me Fae. How can I help you?"</p><p>"I was thinking I might get a bouquet," answered the customer in a curt tone, blushing a little. "How do you price those?"</p><p>"Oh! We have a catalogue," Fae answered, moving behind the counter to procure the item in question.</p><p>Hilda stood and moved to the door, calling her goodbye, "I'll see you later!"</p><p>"Bye Hilda." Fae nodded, letting themselves get washed back into the tide of work.</p><p> </p><p>Safe behind a closed door, even if it was supposed to pass for a workspace, Hilda let a little bit of her nervous energy out of her arms before stretching to compose herself and heading to Claude's office to confirm her return. She had intended just to wave at him from the doorway, but Claude raised a hand curiously, communicating that she should stay as he observed, "You look happy."</p><p>It wasn't quite a question, but Hilda was happy to skip into the room with an explanation, "I asked Fae out."</p><p>Claude's shock was plain on his face, as Hilda's admission came with so many implications. <em> 'Hilda has always been so adamant about finding her soulmate ... or ... maybe that was how she'd started her current pattern of going out and ... When did she grow out of that? She's trying to take back some control. She's doing the opposite of what you are. What are you doing?' </em></p><p>"Oh," he said aloud.</p><p>Persistent in her excitement, Hilda sat herself in the chair across from Claude's desk, as she continued.</p><p>"Yeah, I just ... I heard them telling you their views on soulmates earlier and so I ... I figured what the hell." Hilda leaned forward, clasping her hands together and holding them at an angle, resting her right cheek and then her chin on the back of her left palm. "And they said yes."</p><p>Claude smiled softly. "That's really wonderful Hilda."</p><p>However, she was tilting her head forward in disappointment, eyebrows lowering as she accused him with only his name, "Claude."</p><p>"What?" he asked innocently, raising his hands.</p><p>"Don't give me that fake smile," she whined. "I know you're happy for me without it." She sat back, "I'm not trying to rub anything in."</p><p>"I know," he said quickly, letting his expression shift to something more neutral, wondering if even <em> that </em> was practiced.</p><p>"Good," Hilda insisted, side-eyeing him. "Everything's going to turn out." She stood up and looked over his desk, at the work in front of him and an empty mug, before picking up the latter. "Keep working on Arnault's file, for the rest of the day — maybe even the rest of the week." She started walking away then. "Lorenz knows you have other work to get to."</p><p>Claude smiled again as Hilda echoed his own thoughts back to him.</p><p>"Yeah," he conceded. "You're right."</p><p>Hilda called over her shoulder as she left, "That's nothing new!"</p>
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<a name="section0006"><h2>6. You're a Comforting Presence</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The day over, the office locked, Claude was buckling his seatbelt with the intention of heading home, when his cellphone rang. He settled back into his seat, waving at Hilda as she drove away, and answered, "Lorenz. What's up?"</p><p>Claude could hear Lorenz hum on the other end of the line, and wondered how many nights he would have to face his boyfriend's relief that he hadn't found his soulmate.</p><p>"We're still out of pepper and aluminium foil,"  Lorenz said with a tone that wasn't quite casual.</p><p>Claude snickered, mirthless, thinking of how four days ago when they'd gone shopping, and forgotten these things, he had thought that he and Lorenz were content in their circumstances, free of being soulmates.</p><p>"I'll grab some," Claude confirmed, unbuckling himself. "Need anything else?"</p><p>"Ibuprofen?" Lorenz suggested. "And anything else you might want."</p><p>Claude nodded as he answered, "Alright." He took a breath. "I love you."</p><p>"I love you too. I'll see you soon."</p><p> </p><p>There was a grocery store less than three blocks over, and the walk was refreshing and more convenient than looking for parking. Claude felt relieved only as long as it took him to step inside however.</p><p>It wasn't as busy as it could be, but the crowds did set him on edge, far more than they would normally, to the point where he was needlessly pacing the same aisle, turning to avoid passing shoppers as he collected the few items he needed. Anyone could touch him and his search for his soulmate would be over. He didn't want that, the search had meaning, even if it hurt. Finding his soulmate by chance would feel like salt in an open wound.</p><p>He found himself completely paralyzed looking at the pain medication in the pharmaceutical section of the store, his mind spiraling. This was exactly the sort of scenario where people described their soulmates coming to them, as if the presence of his soulmate could ease him now.</p><p>"Claude?"</p><p>Although he felt that he was probably frozen for a second longer than would be polite, Claude turned to the call of his name. Fae stood at his side, holding a basket of groceries, looking up at him with concern threaded through their expression, their posture, holding out a hand carefully near his elbow.</p><p>"Do you need to find somewhere to sit down?" They asked politely. "Are you okay?"</p><p>Claude felt his whole body relax at the sight of them, familiar and safe to touch; free of being soulmates. He moved his arm about so that he could clasp their hand that had hovered near his elbow, squeezing once before letting go. "Yes. Thank you."</p><p>Fae's expression pursed more carefully, and they did not ask which question he was agreeing to as they nodded over to the waiting area of the pharmacy, following him close behind.</p><p>When Claude had sat, they placed their basket two chairs over. "Do you need anything else?"</p><p>Claude shook his head, and so Fae sat next to him, close enough that their shoulders brushed.</p><p>"This is how it works," Claude said quietly, rolling his shoulders uncomfortably, shaking his head. "This is ..." Fae gave him the time he needed to compose himself, reaching a hand up to his shoulder. "When people hire me to look for their soulmates, if they hadn't seen them before, they generally catch a glimpse of them by accident in public spaces ..." Claude explained. "Like parks, coffee shops, grocery stores ..."</p><p>Fae pouted sympathetically, pressing their thumb and forefinger into the muscles below his neck, meaning to ground him, and keep him from bolting.</p><p>"Anyone could touch me and change my life forever," Claude lamented, before feeling bashful. He laughed, raising a hand to scratch the back of his head, moving to pull away from his companion so that he could look at them in embarrassment. "I mean, that's always true. It just feels ... different now, like something I can't ignore."</p><p>Fae accepted that Claude pulled away, but they still cocked their arm to hit the underside of his elbow with their own as they assured him, "You're alright." Fae pulled their arms back in towards themselves as they continued, "Even if you did meet someone who could <em> change your life</em>," they air-quoted, "don't you think, if they were your soulmate, they'd be understanding of your circumstances?"</p><p>Claude looked a little stunned, but less panicked, as he let his arm fall back into his lap, and so Fae went on, "That's the point, isn't it? Someone who can be compassionate with you? I've never heard of a soulmate story where someone ended up hurt by a desire for control or other malicious intent."</p><p>Fae knew that otherwise people hurt each other all the time, but this was different, and a different conversation than the one they were having.</p><p>Claude took a hissing breath, steeling himself before he nodded, and agreed, "You're ... probably right."</p><p>Fae winked, and Claude felt himself relax a little more. He'd been living his life just fine until being faced with the idea that he could find his soulmate, and Fae was older than he was (he was pretty sure), and they were going about their business, accepting dates, without concern of interruption. He smiled.</p><p>"Better?" asked Fae.</p><p>"Yeah. I'll ..." Claude checked the time on his phone before standing, "I should go."</p><p>Fae chuckled as they stood too. "Well, don't be a stranger."</p><p>"I won't," Claude promised, waving as he strode off. "Be seeing you."</p><p> </p><p>The apartment smelled of home and Lorenz's cooking, and Claude was glad to breach the threshold when he finally did. In fact, he felt he could have melted into a puddle of satisfaction when Lorenz called to him from the kitchen.</p><p>"Welcome home."</p><p>Claude pulled himself out of his shoes and stepped up behind Lorenz, wrapping his arms loosely around his middle and sinking his face into a familiar curve in the back of a bony shoulder. Lorenz hummed sympathetically, "Long day?"</p><p>Turning his head, Claude let his voice rumble against the side of Lorenz's neck, the motion of the words like a mimicry of kisses as his lips moved against the sensitive skin. "You have no idea."</p><p>Lorenz rolled his shoulders to dislodge Claude a little, before reaching forward to adjust a dial.</p><p>"Dinner's almost ready." His inflection revealed that this was an offer and not a warning, as he struggled about in Claude's embrace, turning around so he could face him. Lorenz rolled his eyes fondly when Claude's face lit up in a smile, undoubtedly amused by the flush on his cheekbones. He let his hands meet somewhere behind Claude's shoulders, holding him too as he asked, "Are you hungry?"</p><p>Claude's face fell a little, but he was honest. "I'm not sure."</p><p>"That's alright," Lorenz assured him, shaking his head.</p><p>"Lorenz." Claude sounded troubled, plaintive, and so Lorenz started to pull away to look at him properly as Claude continued, "I almost broke down at the store."</p><p>Lorenz's eyes blew wide before he could mask his concern. <em> 'You sent him there. You sent him alone. You're still hurting him now.' </em></p><p>"I'm sorry—" Lorenz blurted.</p><p>"No, it's..." Claude interrupted, turning his head as he sighed in exasperation. "I'm fine."</p><p>With a nod, Lorenz extricated himself entirely from Claude's embrace. His mind still racing with guilt and worry, he plucked the grocery bag from Claude's wrist and moved to put away his purchases. Claude's aura was off, and he leaned against the counter on one elbow as he watched Lorenz work.</p><p>Recomposed, Claude said simply, "Fae was there."</p><p>That caused Lorenz to smile, and he raised an eyebrow as he looked over his shoulder as he fussed with the aluminium seal on the pepper. "Oh?"</p><p>In other circumstances, he might fuss and tease Claude about his crush, having been enamored with the florist since they'd caught him tripping over a sidewalk; kindness, timing and strength being enough to have Claude enchanted. However, with Claude having just admitted to a breakdown, it was hardly the time.</p><p>"They helped talk me down ..." Claude confessed, before crossing his arms and speaking more thoughtfully, "which is strange because I also saw them this morning."</p><p>"Really?" Lorenz peeped, leaning back against the oven. If Claude and Fae hadn't touched, such circumstance would almost feel like serendipity.</p><p>"Yeah," Claude laughed, patting his pockets, retrieving something. "They returned this."</p><p>"Is that my—?" Lorenz stopped himself, preferring not to state the obvious when he could help it, as he accepted his worry stone. "I ... I guess I've been distracted," he conceded, waving the little rock back and forth. "I thought I’d forgotten it by the bed this morning." He pocketed the thing. "I suppose I should thank them."</p><p>Claude was smiling now, more relaxed as he gossiped. "Hilda asked Fae out today too."</p><p>Lorenz let his brow furrow in surprise. "They had a busy day ... but ... Hilda?"</p><p>He was sure he should feel something about this. Hilda finally taking a step towards ... or was she taking steps away from ... Destiny and happiness were strange things. He didn't know how to feel about it.</p><p>"She seems really excited," Claude said casually, before swaying his head as he offered an explanation, some loose curl fluttering down over his face. "She's frustrated with searching. You know how people are." Lorenz and Claude each let their eyes widen in solidarity as Lorenz nodded.</p><p><em> 'We know so well, don't we?' </em> Lorenz thought as he stepped forward to coil his hands around Claude's shoulders, leaning in for a quick kiss.</p><p>Tired and worn, Claude only half opened his eyes afterwards. "Do I have time for a shower?"</p><p>"Not really," Lorenz admitted, leaning his head and torso away, but moving his hands up to cradle Claude's face, "but I can keep it warm?"</p><p>Claude let his eyes close as he shook his head, nuzzling the space between Lorenz's soft hands, a small noise of protest slipping past his lips. "No, I'll ... I'll just go change."</p><p>They both blushed when Claude opened his eyes again, catching Lorenz in his staring, regardless of how obvious it had been.</p><p>"Okay," Lorenz laughed softly, releasing Claude.</p><p>Claude brought a tee shirt and a pair of sweatpants into the bathroom to wash up and change, needing to unwind at least a little more from the stress of the day before feeling like he could face Lorenz again. He sighed.</p><p>
  <em> 'Maybe Lorenz will find his soulmate first? And free me from my searching.' </em>
</p><p>Dinner was simple — simple enough that Lorenz could still convince himself that he couldn't cook; rice from a cooker, samosas from the oven, steamed vegetables, and a black sticky sauce from a bottle that was all garlic and salt. The samosas were left on a plate on the coffee table, and the rest of the food was served in bowls.</p><p>Eating curled up on the couch next to each other while nonsense played on the television was more relaxing than either man thought it had any right to be.</p><p>When empty bowls were left on the table, Lorenz leaned over to wrap his arms around Claude at an awkward angle, putting an obvious kink in his neck. Claude quickly shifted and lifted his arm to let Lorenz shuffle closer, resting his head on Claude's ribs while Claude tucked himself around Lorenz's side. He felt himself warmed by more than food and proximity when Lorenz tangled their fingers together. After a soft squeeze, Claude gently shift his thumb back and forth, unable to focus on whatever programming was in front of them.</p><p>
  <em> 'I can hold him. And I can fall deeper in love. The risk of being heartbroken would be the same then, as now, if I were to find my soulmate.' </em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. It's a Date (Fae x Hilda)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The office was warm with the light of morning when Claude arrived, where Hilda was already in the thick of it. She held up a hand to request his silence as he entered, chittering politely in her customer service voice to someone on the phone. With an airy laugh, Claude mimed fainting before walking up behind Hilda to fidget around her, moving things on her desk, flicking her ear, and otherwise making a general nuisance of himself, as Hilda continued her strained conversation with what was clearly a potential customer.</p><p>When Hilda was finally able to finish the call, she whirled on Claude, insincere annoyance accompanying mock outrage as she chided, "This is our livelihood!"</p><p>Claude laughed before he answered with his own exaggerated assurance, "They clearly still want to come in. No one can resist your siren song, sweet Hilda."</p><p>Hilda rolled her eyes, before sticking out her chin in a prideful gesture as Claude stepped in and out of his office.</p><p>He returned and rapped his knuckles on her desk, announcing, "Besides, I won't be here to annoy you for the rest of the day."</p><p>"I figured," Hilda agreed with a nod. His work on Arnault's file was taking him out of office as most new investigations did. "I'll hold down the fort."</p><p>"Thanks," Claude said, hesitating at the door before calling back, "and if I'm not back, then, you know, good luck on your date! Not that you'll need it."</p><p>Hilda tossed back her head in a giddy gesture, her hands fisted up by her face in excitement. She accepted Claude's laughter at her enthusiasm, before kissing the index and middle fingers of her right hand and pointing them in his direction. "Thanks hon. Have a good day."</p><p> </p><p>The owner of The Natural Choice had come in to tend to the flower shop while Fae and Dedue made the drive to the cathedral across town. The funeral was grand, and the attendants obviously affluent. The social and financial chasm between Dedue and his soulmate resulting in him asking to take some time alone when they had finished with their deliveries.</p><p>This is what led Fae to walking down foreign streets, peering in book store windows, at pinned restaurant menus, at old gardens on a mostly residential street. Even if they hadn't been turning about, taking in the unfamiliar sights, they doubted they would have missed the shock of purple hair leaning on the edge of a grey stone building.</p><p>"Lorenz?"</p><p>Lorenz nearly dropped his phone, fumbling for a bit before looking up at the source of soft laughter.</p><p>"Fae," he greeted, pocketing his device. "Isn't this a coincidence?"</p><p>They moved up to speak with him more directly, initially uncertain if he might've only met them with a wave and silently encouraged them to be on their way, but it was welcoming to meet him casually and explain, "I was just delivering some flowers at the cathedral. Thought I'd take a quick walk to clear my head."</p><p>Lorenz smiled, and his eyes crinkled handsomely. He gestured to the building behind himself, "I was working too."</p><p>Fae pivoted away on one foot, balancing themselves with their hands in their pockets, as they looked again at the name on the side of the stonework. "The Doctor's Building?"</p><p>Adjusting his hair, Lorenz nodded. "I'm just a tech," he said with a voice that seemed smaller than his personality. <em> 'Sterile Processing Technician,' </em> his subconsciousness provided, but he hardly felt that would be useful or interesting.</p><p>Squinting at him, Fae pivoted back deeper into Lorenz's space, knocking him with a shoulder as they answered him mockingly, "I'm <em> just </em> a florist."</p><p>With a blush and a roll of his eyes, Lorenz clarified, "Most people generally assume I'm a doctor."</p><p>Fae tossed their head back in a short gesture of disbelief. "And you correct them?"</p><p>"Of course," Lorenz chuckled.</p><p>"Why?"</p><p>Lorenz found himself feeling choked, frozen in action when he saw how serious Fae was in their question. He took a moment to consider his answer, looking away before meeting their gaze.</p><p>"I dislike feeling dishonest," he pursed his lips, thinking of Claude and his father, and quickly added, "when I can help it." He smiled again, leaning back against the wall. "Besides, they might start asking me for medical advice if I don't feign ignorance."</p><p>“<em>Feign ignorance </em>? Did you just admit that you're qualified to give me medical advice?" Fae teased, with a laugh.</p><p>Lorenz scoffed. "I'm barely capable, and certainly not qualified." Fae's phone made a small chirping noise and as they answered a text, Lorenz added, "Oh! I meant to thank you for returning my worry stone."</p><p>"It was no trouble," Fae assured him. "I'm glad it found its way home, which I now also need to do." They pocketed their phone and beamed at him. "Date tonight."</p><p>"With Hilda?" Lorenz confirmed, needlessly, feeling his own face light up as they glowed a little brighter. "Claude said she was excited. Have a good time."</p><p>"Thank you," Fae said, clearly elated. They leaned in to capture Lorenz in a quick hug, that he had not been expecting, before turning away. They called back with a wave, "Later!"</p><p>Lorenz let the air rush back into his lungs, and waved, unable to call back loud enough for Fae to hear, "Bye."</p><p> </p><p>Fae was pacing outside the restaurant where they and Hilda had agreed to meet, checking and pocketing their phone as they passed the time, not quite concerned about being stood up, but maybe a little worried about Hilda's interest. They felt more prepared for a text asking if tonight's outing could just be a friendly meeting, or maybe a request from Hilda to invite others out with them.</p><p>All these thoughts evaporated when Fae finally did catch sight of Hilda walking down the sidewalk. It occurred to them that it had been a long time since they'd seen Hilda in anything other than her workplace attire, if they ever had. They felt smug about their own outfit as they admired Hilda's very pastel goth aesthetic.</p><p>She wore a little black dress, with a halter neckline, and a small window in the shape of a heart at the top of her cleavage. The skirt of the dress flared and pleated naturally, showing off diagonal lines of white and pink. Her legs were clad in nylons which gave an illusion of stopping mid thigh, where the material shifted from black to beige. For the chill of evening, Fae had to assume Hilda had also worn socks, as her feet were outfitted in black doc martens. She carried a pink jacket over one arm, which also held a ruffled pleather purse.</p><p>"Evening Hilda," Fae greeted, offering her a bouquet of pink carnations. Although Fae had snuck flowers for Hilda, and others, over the years, this was the first time they'd had a whole bouquet for the woman. They hoped it was noteworthy.</p><p>"Hi Fae," Hilda answered, her voice accompanied with all manner of little tinkling as chunky bracelets, dangling earrings and garish necklaces sang of Hilda's excitement. She accepted the flowers eagerly, breathing in the scent of the healthy blooms with a smile.</p><p>Fae blushed as they worried aloud, "I hope I don't come across as too one-note."</p><p>With a shake of her head Hilda was a melody as she assured them, "No, I've liked the flowers."</p><p>"Good," Fae conceded, moving to open the door.</p><p> </p><p>It was a Thursday, so the restaurant was relatively empty, and the hostess gave them a choice of a booth or table. A booth was quickly agreed upon, and as they sat, Fae removed their jacket. It was an oversized thing that they were happy to be rid of in the heat of the restaurant, decorated with a pattern of fish in white and shades of myrtle green, revealing a dark blue and green plaid button up underneath, which hung open over a black tee shirt with a white design of a spine and ribcage on the chest.</p><p>Conversation came easy, as they spoke of dating and soulmates, Claude and customers, dietary restrictions and the last time Hilda was at this restaurant.</p><p>Sometime after ordering Hilda was chewing at her lips, looping a finger in one of the chains about her neck, and Fae had to worry that perhaps they were being too friendly, or too boring, or otherwise not meeting some expectation that Hilda had, until she opened her mouth to say, "This is so refreshing. Being out and…” She shook her head, “You're good to talk to."</p><p>Fae frowned slightly, leaning forward on an elbow as they asked, "How do your dates usually go?"</p><p>"Oh, I haven't been on a proper date in ... ages," Hilda confessed. "People are usually rushed for one thing," she explained, reaching out to tap the back of the hand Fae wasn't leaning on, in mimicry of the amount of time Hilda felt she was worth to most others, looking for their soulmate. She rolled her eyes as she allowed for the alternative, "Or another."</p><p>"It's too bad so many people don't know the satisfaction of..." Fae agreed, tilting their hand to curl back around Hilda's, "...anticipation."</p><p>They turned beat red immediately afterwards and nearly cracked up laughing, embarrassed of themselves, but then Hilda was blushing too, and the whole interaction felt less silly, more intimate.</p><p> </p><p>Once they'd eaten dinner, Hilda turned the conversation to news of something she'd seen on her phone, and invited Fae to come sit next to her; despite the obvious solution of being able to hand her cell across the table. Fae indulged her easily, pressing up against Hilda's side as they listened to her talk about her jewellery crafting and asked attentive, thoughtful questions about the pieces she wore.</p><p>Almost every necklace got them sidetracked, Hilda having sentimental attachment and personal stories related to her time spent making them, even if those stories were only to say that something she wore was a side project while she finished earrings for a friend that was going to graduate from a master's program, and similar accounts.</p><p>Hilda brought a hand to her mouth for half a moment in surprise before curling her wrist to scratch at her neck. "Oh, but I've been rambling."</p><p>Fae chuckled. "We've been talking. You've not been rambling - and even if you had been, I'd be glad to listen. You’re so passionate."</p><p>Hilda laughed once, loud and sardonic. "I know a mountain of people who would not hesitate to call me the <em> least </em> passionate person they know."</p><p>"Would Claude?"</p><p>Their question took Hilda off guard, and she rubbed the back of her forearm. "Claude and Lorenz, they might be exceptions..."</p><p>"Because they know better — know <em> you </em> better," Fae pressed, nudging Hilda as they leaned forward on the table to give her a height advantage she did not have. "I would have called you passionate long before tonight."</p><p> </p><p>The waiter offered them the bill shortly afterwards, which saw them paying and parting a little too soon. It had started raining while they dined, and they wrapped themselves in their jackets in the open air of the awning as a strong wind blew sheets of water across the parking lot.</p><p>"Regretting the dress?" Fae teased.</p><p>"Maybe," Hilda sighed. "I'm going to wait a minute before going to my car."</p><p>"Say when and I'll make the dash with you," Fae promised. "Which one is yours?"</p><p>On Hilda's mark, they ran to her car, squealing and giggling as chill rain battered against insufficient clothing. Hilda hesitated when she realized that Fae was still by her side.</p><p>"You didn't drive?" she balked.</p><p>"Bussed," they confirmed with a nod.</p><p>"And now you're making me say goodbye in the rain?"</p><p>"I thought you'd like it," Fae confessed, bringing their hands up, first to Hilda's shoulders, and then to her neck as they worried and wondered. <em> 'Maybe the date wasn't good enough for a kiss. Maybe it was too similar to us just being together as friends.' </em></p><p>They leaned in slowly, pausing at what might have been the last moment to flit their gaze across Hilda's face, before pressing a kiss to her cheek — and Hilda was groaning.</p><p>"If you're going to kiss me," she insisted, some confusion and uncertainty in her expression, "then kiss me."</p><p>A single soft laugh escaped Fae before they dipped down again, guided this time by the rain and Hilda's hands on their elbows. They trailed cold wet fingers along the side of Hilda's jaw, warm and dry inside her hood, and met her mouth in a slow, easy kiss, and then another, and another, and maybe five more, as Hilda gasped and invited Fae’s tongue into her open mouth.</p><p>Fae wanted to hear that noise on a loop, wanted to bow in half as Hilda pulled their middles together, her hands finding the small of their back. They bit softly at her mouth as Hilda started to slip away, leaving an extra two quick kisses to the side of her lips as they accepted her retreat.</p><p>“Get in,” Hilda said, curt and straightforward, pink eyes flicking up and down as she watched her date’s expression. Fae nodded quickly and hovered a moment longer, admiring Hilda, her cheeks flush from kissing, her bangs wet from the rain, before scurrying around to the passenger side.</p><p>Before Fae got in, Hilda had time to <b>breathe</b>, lower her hood and smooth her hands over her hair. She watched them speed into the passenger seat, a failed attempt to outrun the rain, and laughed with them as they settled, green hair thick with water.</p><p>“Do you want me to drive you home?” Hilda asked when the laughter turned to humming and their breath caught up with them.</p><p>“If that’s where you want to take me,” Fae answered with a wide smile, blinking away the rain that matted their eyelashes, “but I’m not rushed to go home.”</p><p>Hilda bit her lips before smiling again, nodding as she agreed, “Alright.”</p><p> </p><p>Hilda’s apartment was cluttered, with pockets of organization hiding amongst the chaos, but Fae didn’t see most of it as they kicked off their shoes and were tugged along to a soft black futon in the living room, already lost in kissing Hilda before their back hit the plush, yielding surface. They pulled her closer to them with a hand around her shoulder and a gentle drag of fingernails down the side of her neck. Fae answered a whimper of Hilda’s with their own as they licked her clumsy mouth.</p><p>It was hard to tell if it had been minutes or just a moment, as the rain water started to dry on their skin, frizzing their hair beyond errant hands in sensuous kisses. Fae sucked at Hilda’s bottom lip as they moved to part from her, and gave her a moment to catch her breath.</p><p>“You’re good?” Fae asked, a quiver in their voice.</p><p>“I’m great,” Hilda assured them, her tone gentle and eager. She sucked her bottom lip into her mouth as she lifted herself up into Fae’s lap, spreading her stockinged legs across their thighs. “You’re good?”</p><p>“I’m perfect,” Fae purred, rolling their body forward, up against Hilda’s, holding their arms around her lower back to keep from thrusting her off the couch. “<em> You’re </em>perfect,” they promised as they leaned in to kiss her again, a tongue against parted lips. “You’re beautiful,” another kiss, and a stroke of a rain-wrinkled fingertip across the flush on her cheek. And then Fae was just too busy to speak or offer praise.</p><p>When they kissed, Hilda was all silent direction and guiding hands, curling her neck, tilting her head, swaying, pendulous and rhythmic, to steer Fae’s attention just so. When they parted, for Fae to drag tender, biting kisses across her jaw, Hilda was more vocal, humming pleased little whimpers and gasped words of encouragement as they both pulled her out of her jacket, jewelry jingling all the while.</p><p>Moving from Hilda’s mouth, to where her skin smelled of perfume and rain, Fae smiled into the crook of her jaw. They sucked sweetly on the delicate skin, sliding their right hand from the side of Hilda’s face around to the back of her neck, tightening the grip of their opposite arm around her lower back to offer some of their own direction, leaning her carefully as if in a dance, so they could follow the column of her neck with their lips and tongue. They nuzzled against the edge of Hilda’s dress when they found their path obstructed, kissing once more upon the fabric.</p><p>They wouldn’t be able to reach her shoulder comfortably with their lips, even if they leaned her back in towards themselves — which they didn’t want to do. Fae rocked their hips up against Hilda’s and shifted forward on the futon, so that Hilda could press her knees closer to the back of the couch and sit more snugly in their lap. Their eyes met, interested and dizzy with passion.</p><p><em> ‘I should have asked you out sooner,’ </em> Fae thought to themselves, mournful of any moments they could have been easing that lustful look from the sweet, soft, funny, caring, little woman in their arms.</p><p>Fae surged forward again, bolder, letting their hand on Hilda’s lower back slip lower, grabbing at her ass as they pulled her closer, ravishing Hilda’s neck, running their tongue along the curve of her ear with a chuckle as Hilda shivered.</p><p>“Please,” Hilda hissed, grappling with Fae’s shoulders.</p><p>“Please, what?” they asked instantly, pressing the length of their nose against the side Hilda’s throat, feeling the rise and fall of her breathing.</p><p>Hilda fisted a hand in Fae’s damp hair, any styling long lost to the weather, and pulled their head back and away with an eager tug. Fae followed easily, gratified that it wasn’t to get them away from Hilda, as this was obvious even before she was leaning in to reciprocate, licking and sucking at the expanse of their throat.</p><p>Hunched over as Hilda was, Fae felt secure in releasing one arm and then the other from their hold, in two rocking movements, to slip out of their jacket, draping it over the side of the futon.</p><p>Fae squeezed their hands around Hilda’s waist as they bounced her up and down with a flex of their thighs, groaning as her mouth latched on harder, scratching across their scalp and clinging to the plaid on Fae’s shoulder.</p><p>Fae curled their right hand over the swell of Hilda’s hip and down over her thigh until their fingertips felt the scratch of the nylons on her inner thighs. They laughed softly, panting as they spoke. “I don’t think I’ve had a hickey since I was sixteen.”</p><p>“Oh,” Hilda gasped, pulling away, “sorry.”</p><p>Fae slid their left hand up around Hilda’s shoulder, pulling her back down into the slouched position they were trying to maintain. “I wasn’t complaining.”</p><p>With a smirk, Hilda met Fae’s lips again, which now needed next to no coaxing to open under her kisses. When she felt their arm clutch more securely around her, Hilda slipped her hand down between them as if in a caress, limited by the angle of their proximity, but not blocked from squeezing their breast.</p><p>"I ..." Hilda whispered, feeling hot and flush.</p><p>“Talk to me,” Fae begged, pressing a chaste kiss to Hilda’s nose, rolling their shoulders until their overshirt rumpled back around their elbows. “You?”</p><p>“I’m in my own head,” Hilda said regretfully, a quiet laugh trailing the end of her sentence. “Are my kisses too out of practice?”</p><p>“Hilda,” Fae growled in a tone that sent a shiver down Hilda’s spine. “You’re wonderful. Relax.” Hilda nodded enthusiastically, her eyes blowing wide when Fae squeezed the hand on her thigh. They ran their thumb in a small circle as they asked, “Do you want to take these off?”</p><p>Hilda’s head jerked to one side, considering, calculating, thinking too hard. Fae leaned up to kiss her again before insisting, “You don’t have to.”</p><p>“No,” she said quickly, sitting up, “no, I want to.”</p><p>Fae kept their hands on Hilda’s hips when she stood, but released her when she sat next to their right side, and rolled the thick nylons down over her calves.</p><p>When she was done Fae brought their left hand around Hilda to hold her far hip, pinning her in place as they repositioned their right arm along the back of the futon behind her neck. Hilda took Fae’s face in her hands and kissed them again, on the mouth, on the neck, on the chest when Hilda pulled at the material of their tee shirt to find the jut of their collarbone. Hilda was moving more slowly now, less nervous energy rattling her even as Fae slipped their left hand down her leg until they found the hem of her dress and then back up beneath it, kneading the supple muscles of her thigh.</p><p>Leisurely, Fae was able to pull Hilda up across their lap, in a cradle of sorts. They caressed their fingers across her skin, sliding up over her panties, rolling their thumb in a firm motion, up and down. In time with the gesture, they kissed her temple, pleased, as Hilda jittered and clung with one arm around their neck, the other sliding down over her skirt until she was grasping at their wrist.</p><p>“Too much?” asked Fae.</p><p>“Mm-mm,” Hilda disagreed, biting her bottom lip again, and letting her head loll against Fae’s as they repeated the motion. “I want…”</p><p>“Then you shall have,” Fae chuckled and moved their hand away to reach for their jacket again, pulling a packet out of an inside pocket.</p><p>“Oh?” Hilda asked, curious. “What do you have for me?”</p><p>Fae unpackaged a single nitrile glove and fit it over their left hand, wiggling their fingers at Hilda. “Just me.”</p><p>Hilda hummed thoughtfully, eyelashes fluttering as she watched their hand find its way back down to her thigh. “Just what I wanted.”</p><p>Draping themselves back around Hilda, kissing her cheek and the crook of her jaw, Fae repeated the same motion again, this time letting the solid pressure of their thumb descend lower, finding the soft forgiving dip of her pussy. Hilda cooed and her brow knit softly, and Fae cradled her with their right arm, and kissed her, laughing and nodding against her mouth, swallowing and answering her moans as they continued to fondle her through her clothing.</p><p>It took only a few moments for Fae to feel confident enough to lay their hand back atop Hilda’s thigh, up under the boundary of her panties, and then splay their hand so their thumb slowly curled over her sex, extending a gentle caress over her clit.</p><p>“Yes,” Hilda gasped, surprised with herself, panting into Fae’s neck as she spread her thighs and felt the warm glide of the glove on the edge of her wet lips.</p><p>“Lean away from me,” Fae chuckled, pinching and prodding with careful fingers. “Or lay back. Give me room to work with,” they purred.</p><p>Though Hilda bemoaned the idea of putting distance between them, she leaned away and bowed her back, and drew in a sharp breath that left her in a full body shiver as the pads of two of Fae’s fingers teased at her entrance, not penetrating, just touching, teasing.</p><p>“You’re so pretty,” Fae insisted, adjusting their hand again to pinch Hilda’s clit between the curled sides of their fore and middle fingers, then sliding their fingertips down between her lips. “As delicate as a flower.”</p><p>“Mmm … yeah?” Hilda whimpered, rolling her hips down to meet Fae’s hand in three rhythmic motions.</p><p>Fae swallowed, because the words in their mind were actually far less respectable. They ran their hand back up over Hilda’s mound, feeling the soft bristling of her public hair through the pliant texture of the glove, tilting their hand upwards to stretch at the waistband of Hilda’s panties as they asked, “These cool to come off?”</p><p>Her expression tense, Hilda nodded. “But maybe in the bedroom?”</p><p>“Fuck,” Fae gasped, nodding in turn, “yeah. Yeah, lead the way.”</p><p> </p><p>Fae held their gloved hand aloft and their jacket under the opposite arm as Hilda lead them to the bedroom. There were signs of clutter creeping from under the bed, and dresser drawers that didn’t completely close, but Fae blushed as they realized that the room was obviously prepared; the bed made in a white comforter and pink wool blanket, the floor clean, a clear table by the bedside. Hilda turned on a heart-shaped lamp in the corner so that the room was doused in amber and felt just as soft as the fingertips finding their way around Fae’s neck.</p><p>Throwing their jacket on the head of the bed, Fae grabbed below the swell of Hilda’s ass so that she squeaked as Fae tipped her back to fall into the comforter with a smug expression. Biting her bottom lip again, nodding emphatically yes, Hilda helped Fae pull her panties down past the base of her skirt and across the length of her pretty, peach legs.</p><p>When Fae touched Hilda again it was with <b>intent</b>, and Hilda could immediately tell the difference. They sucked at her neck as they groped her thighs, slipping further down to nuzzle against Hilda’s right breast as the heel of their gloved palm pressed firm pulsing circles at the base of her mound, at the top of her clit. Curled fingertips prodded and massaged her lips with torturous, undulant strokes.</p><p>She raked her nails across Fae’s scalp when they finally pressed their middle finger inside her.</p><p>“Goddess, yes,” Hilda sighed. “Can we undress more?”</p><p>“Absolutely,” Fae answered, rocking their hand back and forth a few times before extracting themselves.</p><p>Hilda helped pull Fae from their upper layers, although then undressing was secondary to putting her mouth and hands on their corded muscles and plush breasts. Fae held their gloved hand away from their intimacy, as they helped hold their right breast up towards Hilda’s mouth. They blushed and pouted as they took in the lustful look of Hilda’s cutting gaze as she sucked their nipple and areola into her curved pink lips, moving only when they tossed their head back to trail kisses across to their breastbone and up to their mouth.</p><p>The look they shared afterwards was electric, and Fae sat back on their heels as they accepted Hilda’s help to pull themselves out of their rain damp pants, which stuck to their thighs every slip of the way. Rolling around on the mattress with giggles and roaming hands (and the soundtrack of Hilda’s jewelry, slowly removed, piece by piece), Fae found the zipper on the side of Hilda’s dress while she popped the button on the collar of the halter.</p><p>Fae let Hilda snap herself out of her bra before descending on the woman, joining hands with her as they pressed their way back between her legs. They mirrored each others movements in a lazy way, Fae sliding their right hand back and forth along Hilda’s upper arm, Hilda’s left hand caressing across Fae’s forearm as a result, meanwhile Fae led Hilda’s other hand down to her sex, encouraging her to touch herself alongside Fae’s gloved fingers.</p><p>Pressing languid, licking kisses to the inside of Hilda’s cleavage, Fae slowly turned to suck a pert nipple between their lips, admiring the heavy flush in Hilda’s face and the way their bodies were fitting together now, warm, wet and stuttered from sweat and rainwater. Fae pressed a finger inside Hilda again, curling and pulsing as they rocked their body forward to whisper into her neck.</p><p>“Like that?”</p><p>Hilda moaned as Fae released the pressure to slide their hand back and forth instead.</p><p>“Or like this?”</p><p>“Mmm,” Hilda whined before chuckling, vibrating her body softly, “I need another finger before I decide.”</p><p>Fae laughed too, moving their hand again to rock the heel of their palm back against Hilda’s fingers fumbling around her clit, “Oh yeah?”</p><p>“Oh, yeah,” Hilda moaned, high pitched and wanton, sliding the hand she had on Fae’s elbow up to their neck and pressing two of her own fingertips into the hickey she’d left.</p><p>With a long trilling noise, Fae leaned into the strain, resting their forehead on Hilda’s forearm. They tapped the tips of their ring and middle fingers back and forth on Hilda’s entrance with increasing pressure, before rocking them back and forth to the first knuckle. They sought Hilda’s lips again, kissing her deeply as they fucked her on their hand, gripping at the low, fat swell of her hip as they sought traction and equilibrium as they focused on driving her forward.</p><p>Hilda expected Fae to tire, for them to move onto another activity as the minutes dragged on, but they didn’t. Their pace ebbed and swole like the tide, checking in with soft words even as Hilda whined and whispered encouragements and clung fast and dramatic to Fae’s shoulders when they found a particular angle or pressure that <b>worked</b>. Fae’s mouth was just as devoted, kissing and murmuring promises and whispers across Hilda’s lips, and forehead, behind her ears, across her body.</p><p>Hilda’s back bowed up towards the magnetic force of Fae’s attention when her orgasm coiled up her spine and down her legs, curling her toes. Gasping against Fae’s neck, Hilda clenched a hand on the wrist of their hand that pinched her nipple. Fae was enraptured, watching Hilda’s long slow fall and the absolutely alluring quiver of her bottom lip in her expression of naked pleasure.</p><p>Hilda bumped her head against Fae’s as she caught her breath, and licked her lips as they moved their hand to rest between her thighs. Hitching a leg around Hilda’s hip, Fae rolled them onto their sides, and it wasn’t until then that Hilda realized how wet she was, gasping as the cool air of the room found her slick backside.</p><p>“Good so far?”</p><p>“<em>So far </em>?” Hilda balked before falling into a fit of giggles, which was only exacerbated by Fae pressing little pecks along her jaw. “Oh, fuck.”</p><p>“Good,” Fae attested. “Be careful with your hand,” they said with a squeeze to the wrist that had joined them between Hilda’s legs. “I’m going to get you a glove and something else.”</p><p>“Okay,” Hilda answered in a daze, nodding absently as she curled in on herself and watched Fae drift away.</p><p>Using their bare hand, Fae deftly rummaged in their coat until they’d found what they were looking for. It was a bit of a struggle to get a glove on Hilda cleanly, but with the wrist of the glove stretched out between Fae and Hilda’s clean hands, they managed. Their fumbling teamwork didn’t end there, as Fae had Hilda stretch the tip of a condom out on two of her fingers for them to cut across and up the side.</p><p>“You ever do this before?” Fae asked when they noticed Hilda’s expression.</p><p>“Mm-mm,” Hilda grunted, confirming the negative.</p><p>Fae smiled big and white and Hilda felt a little lovesick as she thought of that smile meeting her across coffee for years, listening to gossip about dates and finances and the questionable career path she’d ended up in. That smile was so, so welcome here in her bedroom.</p><p>“Help me hold it here,” Fae requested as they nudged Hilda onto her back again and helped orient the pair of them. “We want this side against you. Just like that.”</p><p>Soon Fae was pressing one edge of the condom to Hilda’s skin with their bare hand, while Hilda held the opposite side with her now-gloved right hand, and Fae leaned in to press the warm wet expanse of their tongue against the sheer barrier over Hilda’s exquisite cunt. Hilda’s knee twitched and her breath hitched and the condom slipped as she reacted to that earnest smile finding purpose against her pussy.</p><p>“Hold it tight,” Fae chided softly, and Hilda nodded, eyes glossy and distracted, adjusting her hand. Amused and elated, Fae prodded “Good?”</p><p>“Uh-huh,” Hilda confirmed as Fae sucked on the condom, their lips firm and pliant on Hilda’s clit. Hilda rolled her shoulders, a little disappointed with the sensation as she admit, “Different.”</p><p>Fae nodded, their mouth open, dragging their tongue up and down along Hilda’s lips, their expression falling a little when they saw Hilda’s thoughtful expression. They dipped their tongue down by Hilda’s entrance, and Hilda adjusted her hips as she lamented, “I wish …”</p><p>Fae kissed just beside Hilda’s lips and licked there once more before swallowing the lump in their throat. “We could get tested … and if we’re still doing something like this in two weeks or so,” they smiled darkly, “then I’ll put my tongue inside you like you’re wanting.” Hilda blushed so deeply and hesitated in answering and so Fae insisted, “For hours, if you want.”</p><p>They lapped and sucked a little longer, fighting with the flexibility of the condom, blushing about the awkwardness and Hilda’s rapt gaze. After another long slow suck, Fae grasped Hilda’s thigh with their gloved hand, their thumb following the curve at the base of her ass as they asked, “Do you have anything you want me to fuck you with?” Hilda’s bare hand stilled on Fae’s head, and they quickly offered, “Or I can just keep using my fingers.”</p><p>“I …” Hilda’s knees twitched, this felt like a strange admission, a forward question, “I have two … <em> basic </em> toys.”</p><p>Fae plucked the condom away from Hilda with their gloved hand and rolled back to give her room to work, placing their waste in a half empty bin between the bed and the table. Laying on their side, they trailed a hand up Hilda’s ribs and the soft rolls of her stomach, until she turned back, a massager and a vibrator in hand, looking only the vaguest bit meek. Fae adjusted Hilda’s hair over her shoulder and leaned up to kiss her face and lips in assurance as they dipped the tip of their gloved ring finger down to slide between the lips of her pussy, revelling in the flex of Hilda’s thighs.</p><p>“May I?” Fae asked finally, reaching for the vibrator. Hilda nodded and tilted her neck towards Fae’s mouth, still so close, and they took both invitations, slow and reverent, kissing her neck and taking the vibrator.</p><p>Their breath was warm and muggy by Hilda’s ear when they spoke again. “Do you want a condom on this?”</p><p>“Yes,” Hilda answered near instantly, a gasp. She elaborated as Fae sucked just below her earlobe, “I don’t normally, so … a different sensation … to associate with you. I’d like that.”</p><p>“That’s so fucking hot,” Fae growled, pressing their middle and index fingers into the delicious pressure where their ring finger still slipped back and forth along Hilda’s pussy, rocking the inside of their knuckles up against her clit. Hilda jittered all over.</p><p>Once the vibrator was covered, and Fae had wrapped their other hand in another glove, they toyed with the settings on the device and pushed the tip of it down across Hilda’s mound into the moist pressure outside her cunt. The vibrator was loud, muffled as Fae drove it further between Hilda’s legs, but to both of them, the soft wet noises of Hilda’s resurging pleasure were easy to focus upon. Hilda bit her lips in embarrassment, until Fae licked her collarbone, and their eyes met.</p><p>“Let me,” Fae said, vaguely, and yet still Hilda nodded, gasping and moaning affirmations as she spread her legs and let Fae angle the vibrator inside her.</p><p>“Yes, yes, yes,” Hilda chanted softly.</p><p>“Here?” Fae groaned, moving one hand atop Hilda’s mound and running their thumb back and forth on the sensitive skin above her clit as they continued to fuck Hilda with her chosen implement.</p><p>“There. Fuck! More, oh, just, uhn—”</p><p>Fae rotated the base of the toy, increasing the vibrations before obeying. More solid pressure met Hilda’s inside walls as she let out a long keening noise and Fae pulsed her thumb and forefinger around her clit.</p><p>“Fuck, you’re gorgeous,” Fae half laughed, nuzzling their forehead against Hilda before leaning back, moving their hand from her cunt to rest somewhere beside her head, rocking their hips forward between Hilda’s hips in a mockery of penetrative sex, letting the front of their pelvis bump against the bottom of the vibrator as it buzzed inside Hilda, their grip slipping around the base of it, accidentally increasing the vibration to its maximum.</p><p>Hilda squealed, wrapping her legs around Fae, bucking up into the sensation, moaning as they writhed against each other, the lush, silken slide of their breasts against hers a stark contrast to the solid pressure between her legs.</p><p>“Oh, I’m cumming! Please, just like that, I’m—”</p><p>“Yes, yes,” Fae grunted, sounding strained. “Hilda.”</p><p>As Hilda’s cries started to ebb, Fae adjusted the intensity of the vibrations back down to a slow fizzle and surged forward, letting their hands find Hilda’s hips and their lips find Hilda’s mouth.</p><p>They always felt good bringing a partner to pleasure, but this partner, and this pleasure, hit something deep in their core. Fae felt on the verge of confessing how long they’d fantasized about this, how long they’d be willing to lay here with Hilda, bringing her to climax again and again, of pledging love and allegiance and all manner of things completely unacceptable for a hookup. They kissed her instead, long and intense, moving a hand between them to slip the vibrator back and forth a few more times before removing it and shutting it off.</p><p>“Fuck, let me get you next,” Hilda sighed in a rushed exhale and Fae laughed once softly, raising a dark green eyebrow.</p><p>“Yeah?”</p><p>“Oh, yes,” Hilda insisted, rolling them over so that she was straddling Fae’s lower stomach, freezing instantly and reaching down to hold herself, feeling where she’d already made Fae’s skin slick against the back of her hand. “I’m sorry!”</p><p>Fae giggled and groped at Hilda’s ass. “You’re fine. We’re okay.” They rolled their body up to meet her once and accepted a soft kiss when Hilda ducked down. “Go wash your hands, and maybe get some fresh gloves then, if that’s what you want to do?”</p><p> </p><p>Hilda did as she was told, and covered the head of the massager in a condom and had Fae cursing like a sailor, flexing their arms as they clung to Hilda’s biceps. They fucked and fumbled, Hilda redressed in new undergarments and wished she could hold the curve of the vibrating head between them, and rock herself back and forth, but this would be contrary to all of the safe sex Fae’d been so attentive about, and so instead jut one palm against the toy, sending further jolts of pleasure through Fae’s nerves, while the fingers of her opposite hand pulled softly at their sweet lips.</p><p>It was another half hour before Fae’s passion crescendoed, and Hilda revelled in the clench of their pulsing pussy around her gloved fingers. She collapsed on her side, tired and enamored, and annoyed when Fae insisted they clean up a little more before cuddling, just wanting to be wrapped around them. Hilda had had previous partners call out her name during orgasm, but as most of those partners had barely known her, it felt … overwhelming, luxurious, comforting, to hear Fae gasp and groan her name when they came, as if in desire and not only relief. It had been a long time since Hilda had felt something like that.</p><p> </p><p>Fae gently stroked at Hilda’s long pink hair, untangling little knots as carefully as possible, as they lay on their back. Hilda’s head rested over their left side, somehow unbothered by the beating of their heart and the sounds in their body. A finger followed the arch of a curl around Hilda’s ear and across the curve of her jaw, tickling Hilda so that she shook in irritation, and Fae smiled as their fingertips found the underside of her chin, turning Hilda to look at them.</p><p>“I own a strap on,” they said suddenly, enjoying the new blush on Hilda’s nose before she buried her face back down on Fae’s chest.</p><p>“Then your place next time?” she mumbled, looking back up a little more confidently.</p><p>“I could bring it,” Fae answered with a suggestive shrug, and Hilda cracked up laughing, much to Fae’s surprise.</p><p>“Oh you can bring it alright,” Hilda teased.</p><p>They kissed some more, Hilda slowly curling onto her side and pulling Fae’s arms around them. She could see the clock across the room showing 2:34 and yawned. She felt as though she’d only blinked, but it was 2:57 when she opened her eyes again, Fae sitting up behind her.</p><p>“Oh?” Hilda said softly, sleepy and confused. “Are you leaving?”</p><p>Fae hesitated, pressing a kiss to Hilda’s shoulder before answering, “I don’t have to.”</p><p>Rolling over again, Hilda pulled them back down into the bed, fussing until she could get a blanket over them, noting that Fae reached for their jacket as she did so. She took their face in her hands even as they fidgeted with their phone.</p><p>“Come here,” Hilda pleaded, a pleased smile stretching across her face when Fae leaned in to kiss her and pull Hilda’s head up beneath their chin.</p><p>“My alarm’s going to go off at 5:20,” Fae warned, amusement in their tone.</p><p>“What?” Hilda groaned, nuzzling herself closer, tangling their bare legs together. “Why?”</p><p>“Need to leave early,” Fae mumbled. “Deliveries. Flowers. The usual.” They pressed another kiss to the top of her head. “But I’ll get a cab, you can sleep in.”</p><p>“Mmmm,” Hilda purred happily. “I think I’ll need it.”</p>
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<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Resolution Machine Broke</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The room was dark, blue light filtering through the window the only sign of sunlight, which must have only barely been creeping over the opposite horizon. Claude and Lorenz’s apartment windows faced north, a decision made to help regulate the apartment’s temperature, though it had gotten Claude out of the habit of waking with the sunrise. He groaned when he woke to the sound of a phone vibrating on the bedside table, and stretched himself over the empty space of Lorenz’s absence as he found his ringing phone.</p><p>“Hilda?” Claude answered, sitting up, scratching his bedhead as he looked out towards the window. “What time is it?”</p><p>“Is Lorenz still there?”</p><p>Claude frowned as he took a moment to listen to the quiet of the apartment, not so quiet with the water running in the bathroom, the soft shuffling of a toothbrush. Hilda sounded far too awake for whatever time it was.</p><p>“Mm … yeah?” Claude confirmed, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. “If you wanted to talk to Lorenz, then why did you call me?”</p><p>Hilda’s voice fell a little when she confessed, “I thought he might not answer.”</p><p>Alone and sleep-addled, Claude let his expression betray his confusion, with one wildly raised eyebrow as he stopped mid-motion in standing. He swallowed and let his mouth relax, not wanting to push Hilda while he was still rebooting.</p><p>“I’ll … ask you about that later,” Claude concluded, leaning on the doorframe of the bedroom when Lorenz stepped out of the bathroom, eyes wide with the shock of Claude’s proximity. Claude offered him the phone. “Hilda wants to speak with you.”</p><p>Lorenz held the device close to his chest and asked Claude for an explanation silently, with his own features twisted in uncertainty. Claude could only shrug and do a two-step with Lorenz when Lorenz started walking towards the living room.</p><p>“Hi. Hilda?” he greeted awkwardly, sinking into the couch.</p><p>“I wanted to apologize for hanging up on you before,” she said, sounding breathy and soft. “I was jealous, and lonely, and … and mad at you for hurting Claude — and maybe most of all for self-destructing!”</p><p>Lorenz wondered whether Claude could hear the last of her outburst, loud as it was, as he made eye contact on his way to the kitchen. With a soft laugh Lorenz relaxed, he would have been angry with her too, under similar circumstances. Even so, his decision to encourage Claude to find his soulmate wasn’t pulled from nothing, nor something he wanted to discuss presently.</p><p>“Hilda,” he repeated, trying to convey a warning and his understanding all in one, meaning to continue his statement until she plowed through.</p><p>“I felt like…” she sighed and Lorenz could hear the clatter of metal, keys or jewelry or something else, “I felt like you made me out to be the bad guy when <em> I </em> wanted us to find our soulmates, and I know that was a lifetime ago, but … it was immature of me to think of it, to think of how you’d want Claude to find his soulmate, but not me.” Before Lorenz could protest Hilda insisted, loudly, “<b>I know that’s not true.</b> I know. And I’m so sorry I let myself get caught up in ancient history when you obviously need a friend right now. I want you to be happy too, Lorenz.”</p><p>His throat and heart felt tight, and it took everything to school his expression as Claude set himself up at the dining table with a bowl of cereal. Lorenz took a deep breath and adjusted his grip on the phone as he found himself saying Hilda’s name again, more quietly this time, intimate, grateful.</p><p>“Hilda. Thank you. There’s really nothing to forgive.”</p><p>“I know how hard it is to tell someone you love that they need to consider other paths,” Hilda  confided, and Lorenz nodded, if only to bow his head and attempt to hide his face.</p><p>“I know you do,” he assured her. “I’ve never meant to squander the …” Lorenz abandoned the sentence, because that was wrong, he did not think of the life he had as any sort of gift from Hilda. “I … You have me tongue tied.”</p><p>“You haven’t,” Hilda said anyway, sympathetic. “I would never accuse you of that.” They both snickered. “If you need to talk later … Let me know.”</p><p>“I might,” Lorenz confirmed, adjusting his hair and smiling. “How was your date last night?”</p><p>Hilda laughed with less reservation. “Why do you think I’m in such a good mood this morning?”</p><p>“Well…” Lorenz droned, amusement in his tone as he stood, and moved to seek out his shoes, “Congratulations. Do you think you’ll be going out with them again?”</p><p>“We didn’t discuss specifics,” Hilda said, her tone casual and joyous in a way that was so unlike how she spoke of other dates that Lorenz found that he was still smiling, earnest and unburdened, “but I am doubtless.”</p><p>“I’m happy for you,” Lorenz promised, bringing his shoes back around Claude, pressing a kiss to his forehead before sitting beside him. “I need to start heading out though. Do you want to say anything more to Claude?”</p><p>“No,” Hilda said thoughtfully. “Tell him I’ll see him at work.”</p><p>“I will.”</p><p>“Have a good day, Lorenz.”</p><p>“You too, Hilda. Goodbye.”</p><p>“Bye.”</p><p> </p><p>As Lorenz bent over to fit himself into his shoes, Claude swallowed a mouthful of food and asked, with only the barest disbelief, “Did Hilda just call you to boast?”</p><p>Lorenz chuckled as he straightened himself, checking the time on Claude’s phone again before standing. “Maybe a little.” He smiled over his shoulder while he grabbed his coat. “She wanted to apologize for hanging up on me a few days ago. She was angry with me for upsetting you,” Lorenz explained as he walked back towards the table.</p><p>Claude pouted and dropped his spoon. “I—”</p><p>“Now don’t you apologize,” Lorenz begged, running a hand through Claude’s hair, leaning in for a quick kiss. “I have to go, love. Text me later.”</p><p>“I will,” Claude agreed, half a smile creeping up on him as Lorenz walked away. “Miss you already.”</p><p>“I miss you too,” Lorenz answered with a fond roll of his eyes and a lazy wave of his hand as he left for work.</p><p>There was a time where they each had a vehicle. Lorenz still wondered sometimes if it would ever be an option again, even if it was more environmentally friendly, economic, and otherwise …  acceptable, to only have the one car between the two of them. The bus station was only a fifteen minute or so walk from the apartment however, and so long as Lorenz kept the same place of employ, it wasn’t even an inconvenience to have to leave home an hour or so before Claude. He even still arrived home two or more hours earlier than his boyfriend, which put him in the habit of preparing dinner, though Lorenz was sure that they both still preferred Claude’s cooking when he had time for it.</p><p> </p><p>“Claude!!!” Hilda squealed when he entered their office. She had been standing by their printer and quickly scurried over to him, an obvious skip in her step.</p><p>“Hey Hilda,” he laughed. “You’re so peppy!”</p><p>She sighed and tossed her head back in a swoon before straightening out and walking beside him with her hands linked behind her back. “I just … I really had a great time with Fae last night. You know that I usually just go to those Soulmate Socials? And we all just watch the occasional couple pair off, but the majority of us are just … hopeful and drunk, and disappointed. It’s been worse lately, with party-goers that look five years my junior.”</p><p>Claude scoffed, putting his bag on the floor by her desk. “You’re not old, Hilda.”</p><p>“I know,” she insisted, looking affronted that he felt the need to say so, lightly slapping his arm, but her smile was unbothered. “I’m just saying, I would hate to discover my soulmate is someone fresh into college.”</p><p>Claude’s mouth went dry, he hadn’t even considered that his soulmate might not even be of soulmate-age. “Fair point,” he conceded readily, adjusting his hair.</p><p>“Anyway, I had a point!” Hilda said happily, tugging at the open edge of Claude’s suit jacket, stealing his attention in such an obvious way that he was embarrassed by his recent transparency.</p><p>“Go on.” He smiled back, relaxing as he gestured with his hand.</p><p>“Well. People who are comfortable dating outside their soulmate usually aren’t like you and Lorenz,” Hilda said quickly, obviously trying to keep Claude from stewing too much on the fact that even he and Lorenz didn’t quite feel like him and Lorenz lately. “They just want … gratification. Usually to a selfish extreme.” Hilda touched her neck before admitting, “It was nice to feel … seen. Wanted.”</p><p>Claude wanted that for Hilda. He wanted that for her so badly. <em> ‘Maybe more than I want that for myself ... No, I have that </em> — <em> had that? Fuck.’ </em></p><p>It was overwhelming that she wasn’t left dazed and disappointed by a romantic outing. His emotions still running high, Claude pulled her in for a hug, his arms up around her shoulders. She peeped once, but only in surprise, not in protest, as she tucked her small hands up behind the dip between his shoulder blades, and so Claude squeezed her closer. Even when the phone rang, Claude tilted his head to look across to a clock before maintaining the embrace.</p><p>“Let it ring.” <em> ‘We’re not open yet.’ </em></p><p>Hilda leaned her face back away from Claude, raising an eyebrow at him. Claude said simply, “I’m happy for you Hilda.”</p><p>She frowned up at him, letting her hands slip down across his back to his elbows, and then the phone was ringing again, as if the caller had simply hung up and tried again. They parted, Claude laughing, “Okay, okay, so obviously they can’t leave a message.”</p><p>Hilda winked as she answered the phone, transitioning seamlessly into this entirely different way she supported Claude, leaving him dazed, and a little heartbroken as he retreated to his office.</p><p> </p><p>They visit Fae and the cafe for lunch, Hilda insistent that Claude tag along, despite his worries that they didn’t need him interrupting. Fae was just as comforting, even going so far as to suggest that the three of them, plus Lorenz, do something on the weekend. Claude turned down them and Hilda, greedy in his need for Lorenz’s attention after the week they’d had, and also behind on chores and calling his parents, and he doubted he would be good company.</p><p>“Some other time.”</p><p>He could tell they weren’t too put out, even despite the pouts, as Hilda adjusted her chair so that she was sitting sideways in it, holding the back of it and resting her head on Fae’s shoulder.</p>
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<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Sundays are Liminal Space (Claude x Lorenz)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was midafternoon, and after a shower, Lorenz had, irresponsibly, lain in bed. One towel around his waist, and another beneath his head, but the comforter and his pillow were still absorbing the moisture from his tired body, making the covers cool and damp. Half on his side, and half asleep, Lorenz couldn’t help the grunt and smile that escaped him when the mattress dipped down with a familiar weight.</p><p>“Claude,” Lorenz called, thinking to ask him about the laundry and something warm to wear, but then there was a warm hand on his hip, a thumb curling under the barrier of his towel, and a pair of lips tickling his ribs, so that he huffed a laugh and opened his eyes. Claude was already blushing, as if the sight of him, long and gangly and familiar, should be any manner of enticing. Lorenz followed the steady pressure of Claude’s hand, rolling onto his back as Claude moved to leave a slow open mouthed kiss on the jut of Lorenz’s hip bone.</p><p>After a sigh, Lorenz let his eyes flutter closed again, resting his head back as he stroked his left hand through Claude’s hair, his right resting on his own chest, feeling the beat of his heart.</p><p>“You’re so fucking transparent,” Lorenz observed absently, smirking, eyes still closed, as Claude started pulling him out of the towel.</p><p>“As if I’m just supposed to ignore you when you lay yourself out like a temptation. A siren on the rocks.”</p><p>Lorenz laughed softly as Claude slid a hand up the center of his chest and up beneath Lorenz’s lazy fingers, shifting back and forth against a patch of chest hair until Lorenz closed his hand around Claude’s.</p><p>“Is it your turn to talk to me in metaphors?” Lorenz teased, as he was the one who was far more often stumbling through bad poetry with Claude. He gasped and squinted his eyes more firmly shut as Claude groped at his thighs and left another wet kiss on his lower stomach.</p><p>“I could try,” Claude suggested at a whisper, “but I do love it when you sing to me, my siren.”</p><p>“Clever,” Lorenz granted, shivering as Claude’s breath ghosted over his cock and his lips found his legs, and Lorenz was sure he could feel the smile in them.</p><p>Letting go of Claude’s hand, Lorenz reached over to grab another pillow on the head of the bed, propping himself up a little more securely before opening his eyes. Claude’s hands had wandered, one on Lorenz’s knee, the other on his side, where his thumb could feel the shift of muscle where the modest swell of his peck met his ribs, but it was Claude’s expression which held Lorenz in place.</p><p>“What is it?” he asked, his fingers falling from Claude’s hair down the side of his face so that his middle finger traced the line of facial hair on Claude’s cheek.</p><p>“Just admiring you,” Claude admit, his voice gentle, as he turned his face away from Lorenz’s hand so that it found the skin below his ear, and Lorenz felt the goosebumps rise beneath his touch.</p><p>Lorenz opened his mouth to answer, but instead only sighed pleasurably as Claude’s thumb rolled over his nipple. Smug, Claude smiled and turned his face back into the loose touch of Lorenz’s hand, kissing his palm, once chastely, and then a second time with a press of tongue so that Lorenz yelped in disgust, pulling his hand away and hitching his knee out of Claude’s grasp as he moved as if to sit up. Laughing, Claude moved his hand from Lorenz’s leg to his cock, squeezing at him and pressing down on his chest to dissuade him from running away.</p><p>Lorenz shifted his weight on his wrists before settling back down, groaning as he closed his eyes again, his hands wrapping around the forearm that rest against his stomach.</p><p>Angling him, Claude ducked to swirl his tongue around the head of Lorenz’s cock, then shifting his hand to drag his saliva down the length of him.</p><p>“Do you think if I find my soulmate, they’ll just fuck off when they find out I can’t count the times I’ve had your cock in my mouth?” Claude asked, half serious, chuckling when Lorenz squeezed upon his arm and whined an airy snuffling noise, though the latter was probably more related to what Claude was doing with his wrist.</p><p>Sliding his arm in a caress, Claude bent his elbow, pressing down on Lorenz slightly until he could balance his weight elsewhere. He smiled up at his beautiful boyfriend when he timidly parted his legs for him to find his place, and caught sight of that sliver of purple before Lorenz blinked his eyes closed again. Claude tenderly sucked on Lorenz’s thighs, whimpering softly when he bucked into his hand, releasing the pressure of his mouth only to nip with careful teeth and lave at the skin with his tongue.</p><p>Lorenz scratched back and forth through the hair on Claude’s forearm, rolling himself up into the comforting back and forth of fingertips on his stomach, the more invested stroking of the firm grip upon his cock. He sighed, his body loose and relaxed; he felt no more solid than his damp hair upon the pillows.</p><p>“Embraced by you, I fall.”</p><p>Claude could recognize Lorenz’s poetry instantly, and nuzzled his face into Lorenz’s thigh, purring, and biting, and breathing him in. He looked up and saw that Lorenz was watching him openly now, flush on his cheeks and the hollow of his collarbone. Claude watched the flick of Lorenz’s tongue as he licked his lips like it was a shooting star.</p><p>“Safe and loved in your gracious company.”</p><p>Lorenz hissed as Claude sucked his cock into his mouth, his hand slipping aside to drag up through his pubic hair. Claude like to hear him stuttered and stupid, and so long as Claude moved slow and sweet, Lorenz was happy to indulge him.</p><p>“Wuh-we-will, fuck.” Lorenz let Claude tug his hand out of his grasp, which slid up to grope at Lorenz’s chest and pet across the curve of his throat, his own hands tangling in Claude’s hair, mostly soft and lax, but occasionally firm and jittering.</p><p>“Will we l-l-land on our feet,” Lorenz continued, squeezing his knees against Claude’s sides as he trailed kisses down his erection, holding him up with his thumb, “separated by miles? Separated by inches?” Claude adjusted his grip and pressed his thumb up the base of Lorenz’s shaft until it bumped against the head of his cock, and Lorenz let his voice waver out of him, lips open on empty syllables. When he seemed to recollect himself, Claude let his fingers curl up over the tip of Lorenz’s penis, and leaned forward to kiss his opposite hip bone.</p><p>“We have only the fall …”</p><p>Claude breathed a quiet laugh on Lorenz’s skin before moving to sit back on his heels, pumping at Lorenz’s cock a few more times. “Roll over, my pretty poet,” it was a suggestion, a request, and with a grunt, Lorenz nodded.</p><p>After shuffling out of the majority of his clothing, Claude laid across Lorenz’s back. He kissed his neck and rolled his knuckles in a circle on a sharp shoulder blade and asked, “Can I eat you out?”</p><p>Regardless of how Lorenz might answer, Claude smiled against his skin as Lorenz shifted beneath him, the smile spreading pleased and eager as Lorenz’s head bobbed in assent, “Yeah-ah! Yes.”</p><p>Claude bit into the curve from Lorenz’s neck to his shoulder, dipping his hand lower, and his thumb into the crook of his spine. Taking his time, as he kissed across the expanse of his back, svelte and sensitive, Claude slipped his hand to the cleft of Lorenz’s ass, rubbing small circles with his ring and middle fingers on the delicate skin around his entrance.</p><p>It was only in the middle of Lorenz’s spine, below his ribcage, that Claude parted his lips to lick at him with long, slow strokes of his tongue, ending in soft little sucks on the side of Lorenz’s back. Each such kiss smacked audibly, and as Lorenz twitched, Claude was sure it was just as much for the noise as for the sensation. He huffed out a breath of warm air on the damp skin beneath him, and more sloppily trailed his open mouth affectionately downwards. When Lorenz moaned, Claude’s hands chased lower, massaging Lorenz’s thighs and the meat of his ass, fondling him, pinching the muscle, pressing him forward with his weight and his hands as he lay more bodily against his boyfriend.</p><p>Claude was hard by the time he was settling himself further down on the bed, laying between Lorenz’s legs; and tugged gently on Lorenz’s hips so that he was raised on spread knees, to confirm that he still was too.</p><p>Using his thumbs to grant him access, Claude sighed, arousal and reverence dizzying him as he dragged his tongue from the base of Lorenz’s ass, up the side of him, on the boundary where cheek met cleft. Claude purred against Lorenz’s skin as he watched his whole body react, the rise of his chest as his lungs gasped in air, the shiver on his skin and in a few pinched muscles, and the twitch of his hole. He licked on and around that ring of muscle until both he and Lorenz were breathing heavily, leaving comforting kisses and teasing nips of his teeth on Lorenz’s backside when he pulled away. Catching his breath, Claude slid his thumb down to put pressure on Lorenz’s hole, causing him to whine and squirm, and Claude to chuckle as he released his hold.</p><p>“Can I fuck you?”</p><p>“Fuck, yes,” Lorenz begged, turning his head but not looking over his shoulder, his face flush. He was sure his tone had been as clear as his body in his interest.</p><p>Claude left the bed then, grabbing the flavored lube and a small black butt plug, and bounced back into place once Lorenz had rolled the comforter down across the sheets — Claude had just finished the laundry, and while spilling pina colada lube all over the comforter wouldn’t have been the worst thing to happen, that Lorenz was trying to preserve some of Claude’s productivity was endearing. He reached out to take Lorenz’s hips in hand, pressing a kiss to the side of his ribs as he guided him to lay diagonally across the bed, before promptly popping the cap on the bottle.</p><p>Claude shook some lubrication in a closed fist, warming it, mostly intentionally messy when he squeezed his fist to drizzle it on Lorenz’s skin, following the drops with his mouth and his fingers.</p><p>It wasn’t long before Claude had Lorenz writhing and whimpering under his efforts, pressing his hole open with the pads of two fingers as he prodded at him with his tongue, moaning in time with his boyfriend. When Claude pulled away, Lorenz quickly scrambled onto his knees, reaching back to hold the back of his thighs, begging with his body even as Claude pressed a fresh globule of lube inside him with two rocking fingertips. With another sob of pleasure, Lorenz let Claude guide his hands up to hold his ass, cursing into the bed when he found himself once more accosted by Claude’s hungry mouth.</p><p> “I’m going to need another shower after this,” Lorenz commented, his chuckle turning into a stuttered cry of ecstasy as Claude laughed too, sucking at the sensitive skin just next to his entrance.</p><p>“My beard is fucking ruined,” Claude agreed, sounding delighted, purposely making it worse as he lapped at the lube trailing down Lorenz’s body a few more times and wrapped his hands around those long pale fingers, and squished himself into his boyfriend’s ass.</p><p>Lorenz did not find cause to stop his little pleading noises when Claude released this embrace. After trailing more lube on his hand, Claude was pressing his middle finger deep into Lorenz, and when he started to fuck into him, Claude’s whole forearm shifting back and forth, Claude adjusted the angle of his whole body to accomodate licking Lorenz’s balls.</p><p>The occasional curse passed Lorenz’s lips as he tried to relax just enough that Claude’s patient ministrations bore results, but not so much that he came all over the sheets. He found himself relieved when Claude replaced his finger with the lubed tip of the plug. The swell of the toy was slightly wider than two of Claude’s fingers, and as such, was useful to either transition to those digits, or to the tapered swell of his fat cock.</p><p>Lorenz keened, somehow feeling his face blush from embarrassment despite the flush of arousal, as the wet echo of the toy rang in the quiet of the room.</p><p>“You still with me?” Claude asked, his tone curt, desperate.</p><p>“If you touch my cock I’ll come,” Lorenz said very quickly in answer, and Claude snickered, pressing the toy in deeper so that Lorenz sobbed and let go of his legs to brace himself back against the stimulation.</p><p>“Was that a request?” Claude teased, smug, knowing the answer.</p><p>“No,” Lorenz whined, “no, I want to last. I want this to last.”</p><p>After another chuckle, Claude sighed. “I don’t know if I’ll last at this rate.” Whether this was earnest or teasing was lost to both of them, as Claude sped and angled his wrist so that Lorenz was moaning openly.</p><p>When Claude removed the toy, he replaced it with two fingertips just past the first knuckle, gently rocking his hand so that he was pressing Lorenz open with every other movement.</p><p>“Do you want a condom?”</p><p>Lorenz’s breathing overtook every syllable that tried to escape his lips so that Claude had to take his hand away and let him gather some composure. Meanwhile, Claude finally slipped the band of his underwear over his cock and stroked himself a few times.</p><p>“I … We’re such a mess already,” Lorenz chuckled softly, rolling onto an elbow to look back at Claude, licking his lips as his eyes drifted over his rosey chest, his russet cock, “you might as well leave me dripping with you.”</p><p>Claude’s face fell as if in such exquisite torture for a few moments, clearly taken with the imagery, eventually nodding in answer. He stilled his hand and pinched at the base of his cock as he asked, “How do you want to be?”</p><p>“Like this,” Lorenz confirmed, grabbing the pillows to prop under himself and settling back down on his stomach, legs parted and knees hooked, leaving room to press up onto them but laying stationary for now.</p><p>Claude grunted in interest as he pulled himself from his last layer of clothing and more seriously coated his cock. Once he was situated, he crooked the tip of an index finger into that taunting ring of muscle as he accused Lorenz in a tone that was dark and breathless, “Then you <em> were </em> teasing me before? Because you were laid out just like this then.”</p><p>“No, but … if the pose has been enough for you to … <em> oh, wait, keep doing that</em>.”</p><p>“Lorenz, you’re beautiful and I love you, but this is somehow worse than if you were doing this on purpose,” Claude whined, complying.</p><p>“Who says I’m not?” Lorenz asked with half a laugh that stuttered out of him, making his body squeeze on Claude in a way that made his cock twitch.</p><p>“Fucking—” Claude cursed with a wide smile, rolling his eyes as he removed his hand and held Lorenz open long enough to press the head of his dick against him. “You’re lucky I love you.”</p><p><em> ‘So lucky…’ </em> Lorenz smiled into the sheets as Claude slowly sunk forward. He could hear as Claude exhaled through rounded lips and followed his example, a strained sigh punctuating the full sensation brought on by the head of Claude’s hard cock. Lorenz whimpered as Claude pulled out entirely and sunk two of his fingers inside of him instead; massaging, spreading lubricant, and if Lorenz had to guess, maybe just fucking around, as those fingers sought his prostate.</p><p>“Claude.”</p><p>“Oh, I love you,” Claude promised, moving his hand aside again as he pressed in with his erection.</p><p>Lorenz moaned as he let Claude direct him, large warm hands on his hips positioning him as he leisurely rocked their bodies together. He might’ve equated Claude’s calm, languid pace to a sea breeze, but Lorenz felt he was nothing like the passive trees or the lazy hammock in the image that came to mind, as he gripped the sheets, and curled his ankles around Claude’s calves to help with the motion.</p><p>“Sweetheart,” Claude whispered, a word of wonder and praise. He loved every signal Lorenz was giving him, and could have cried. <em> ‘Love this. Love me.’ </em> His right hand, still slippery with lube, coiled around Lorenz’s side until Claude could hold his chest, if only at a distance, at an angle.</p><p>“This … this angle … just like this,” Lorenz sobbed and Claude felt his neck and his jaw go tight as he grasped his lover more firmly and forced his hips forward, grinding his erection into the position that had Lorenz begging, for a moment or two, before snapping his hips, the force of it pulling choked a cry of pleasure from his partner.</p><p>Claude was shuddering, Lorenz was soft and tight, and they were both so slick by now … Claude was speeding before he was thinking, grunting a bassline to Lorenz’s gentle moans.</p><p>It seemed welcome, as Lorenz moved to clasp his hands behind his back, stretching his chest out away from Claude, and arching back into that sweet, sleek friction. Claude slowed significantly, so that between each thrust he could grab a hold of either of Lorenz’s forearms, bowing him further, showing off the beads of his spine, and the dimples at his waist, all guiding Claude’s focus to their point of carnal connection.</p><p>“Yes — <em> please </em> — Claude,” Lorenz babbled. “More. More — <em> oh! </em> — <b>more</b>.”</p><p>Lorenz gasped in disappointment as Claude suddenly stilled, perhaps not completely motionless, but just barely not so.</p><p>“Sorry,” Claude sighed, laughing once, bouncing their bodies before taking a moment to pant. “You’re so fucking hot Lorenz. I need to slow down for just a minute if you need more.”</p><p>“Let me ride you,” Lorenz suggested, bending his arms, relying on Claude to maintain his grip so that the action forced him back onto his solid cock.</p><p>“You’re sure?” Claude asked, sounding dizzy.</p><p>“Yes,” Lorenz huffed, sagging in Claude’s hold until he had his arms back, slamming them into the bed to try and catch himself while they slipped apart.</p><p>Initially Claude just rolled over, but Lorenz maneuvered him to lay down properly, one pillow beneath the small of his back, a second beneath his head, and then it was just a matter of spreading his thighs around Claude’s hips, stroking him, a little unnecessarily, with fresh lubrication, before bouncing, slowly downwards. Halfway to being seated in Claude’s lap, Lorenz reached up to adjust his hair and the sight of him, proud and pleasured, casual and concentrated, also risked throwing Claude over the edge.</p><p>Claude reached out to hold the sides of Lorenz’s ass, carefully swaying himself up to meet Lorenz’s pace, until he was seated in his lap. Lorenz slid long pale fingers up the soft brown skin of Claude’s stomach, and groped at his chest before settling his hands on the bed, to either side of Claude, rolling his hips down in several little half circles.</p><p>“I love you too,” Lorenz said finally, kissing Claude’s sheepish expression as he bounced back against his dick.</p><p>When Lorenz sat up, Claude reached for his cock and Lorenz bat his hand away, chiding, “Not yet. Let me focus.”</p><p>Claude could only lick his lips and smile, resting his hands on Lorenz’s thighs as he conceded.</p><p>Splaying his hands on Claude’s lower stomach, Lorenz could feel the muscle below the skin and fat, and he smirked at Claude, knowing that even though it would knock the wind out of him that he would allow Lorenz to brace himself here. He shifted his weight on his knees and bounced, rocking himself back and forth until he found something of the angle from earlier, and then the pace — that was harder, and his legs burned, but when Claude took hold of Lorenz’s wrists again and forced his cock upwards in a smooth, continuous motion, it was well worth it. Moreover, the noise Lorenz made was … like a mockery of pornography, an embarrassing, wanton moan.</p><p>He pulled at his hands as his lips snapped closed, and both he and Claude knew it was with intent to cover his mouth, but Claude held fast, pulling his wrists aside so that Lorenz fell forward a little.</p><p>“No, come on,” Claude begged, rocking his hips.</p><p>A timid smile spread across Lorenz’s features as he nodded. “Okay.”</p><p>“Okay?” Claude answered, white teeth alighting his face.</p><p>“Yes,” Lorenz answered, and found his wrists freed, Claude’s hands now atop his thighs, holding onto him as he repeated that roll of his hips, fucking into Lorenz as he focused on simply staying upright, on staying in position.</p><p>“Oh shit,” Claude cursed, encouragingly, wishing he had the flexibility, or height, or whatever it was he needed to keep hitting Lorenz just like this and suck at that long, blushing neck as Lorenz’s head bobbed aside, squeaks and sighs of pleasure falling from his lips.</p><p>“Touch yourself,” Claude urged, attempting to sit up a little, only to find that this pulled his pelvis away from Lorenz in a way that was, frankly, unacceptable in the circumstances, and shifted back, so that his pace was thrown off and Lorenz felt like he was impaled an extra inch because of the discoordination.</p><p>“Fuck! Yes. <em>Claude</em>,” Lorenz cried, placing his right hand over the left half of his chest, more as if he were supporting himself than offering any sort of stimulation, but his left hand found his the head of his cock and pulled precum and residual lube down his grateful shaft. He moaned in time with Claude’s thrusts, and barely had to grip himself before he was cumming all over the center of Claude’s chest, and distantly he could hear Claude’s affirmations, but presently all he could process was feeling full and empty, and completely boneless.</p><p>Claude sat up then, grabbing Lorenz around the shoulders and pulling him down into him as he lay back once more, the motion sliding Claude’s hands down Lorenz’s back, until he could grab hold of his ass and the back of his thighs. The motion pulled them apart, but for scarcely a second as they both reached back and bent their knees and angled themselves, to help angle Claude’s cock back inside.</p><p>“Lorenz—?”</p><p>“Yes!”</p><p>Familiar enough with Claude’s habits to know his meaning, Lorenz answered emphatically yes, so that his tone could not be mistaken. He nuzzled into the side of Claude’s head, muffling his voice in his mess of brown hair while Claude slammed into him, hard and fast, as he sought his release. Lorenz felt long past fucked out by the time he felt the delicious warm rush and pulsing throbs of Claude’s orgasm.</p><p> </p><p>They lay together for a few heartbeats, weary and sated. Separating finally, but still laying side by side, close and comfortable. Claude pressed little loving kisses across Lorenz’s face and neck … trailing his tongue over his soulmark.</p><p>Lorenz hissed, but didn’t otherwise object, figuring that if he tried to say that the mark didn’t matter, that Claude could use those words against him. Instead he squeezed at Claude’s shoulder until he looked at him.</p><p>“Come kiss me,” Lorenz pleaded, nodding, and Claude smiled, almost sneering with the curve of his lips expressing the remnants of his fading arousal. </p><p>Caressing his hand over Lorenz’s soulmark, stretching his thumb into the dip in his collarbone, he pulled himself up on the bed to comply.</p><p>Lorenz made a soft noise of exaggerated disgust into Claude’s mouth and pulled away laughing, “I forgot you were going to taste like pineapples.”</p><p>Claude laughed too, merciless and mischievous as his hand curled around Lorenz’s neck to pull him back into less and less hesitant kisses. </p><p>Running a fingertip in small circles on the soft skin between the line of Claude’s sideburn and the start of his ear, Lorenz tapped against his cheek when he wanted to signal a parting, otherwise stuck to his lover as Claude bit and sucked on his lips and tongue.</p><p>“I need to …” Lorenz said, gesturing vaguely to himself, and Claude snickered, nodding and laying back to look at the ceiling as Lorenz left to clean himself.</p><p>Claude thought of a client he’d had around two years ago, a married woman, looking for her soulmate without her husband knowing … and he couldn’t even imagine knowing his soulmate and choosing to separate himself from Lorenz.</p><p>He traced his soulmark absently with his thumb and while he hated the idea of ruining someone else’s expectations, Claude imagined the scenario, of finding this person, grazing their wrist, shaking their hand, and their whole face lighting up with joy and relief, while his own darkened, as he shoved them away, as he made a scene and shouted at them that he wasn’t leaving his boyfriend for them; but this could never happen. Claude knew he would smile politely, that he would want the earth to swallow him, but that it unsympathetically would not, forcing him to face the scenario and find some other solution ... </p><p>He blinked his eyes several times, willing away tears that had started to form, and prepared himself to start cleaning the room.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This and the next chapter were supposed to be 1 chapter of 2k words...</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. It's Still Sunday (Fae x Hilda)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Barring an interruption, tonight would be the third night Fae and Hilda spent together. After their date on Thursday, Friday had been a night of reprieve, and then after Fae had finished work on Saturday, they had let Hilda take them to a club. The atmosphere had felt a little off, as there had been too many couples with faintly glowing soulmarks dancing in the neon lights, but they’d enjoyed each other’s company and still returned to Hilda’s apartment, tipsy and tired from drink and dance, where they promptly fell asleep while a bittersweet romantic comedy played in the background.</p><p>Sunday had been spent entirely in each other’s company, with one or the other of them constantly checking in about whether their time together was getting to be too much. Each time no objections came, the air felt lighter, conversation grew louder, and a few more secrets were shared.</p><p>After Fae made breakfast, Hilda took them home to grab a change of clothes and help them load a backpack with oddities from various junk drawers — single earrings, miscellaneous buttons, and other items they were willing or interested in parting with, which Hilda could use in her jewellery. Back at Hilda’s apartment, the rest of the day was spent kissing and gossiping, crafting and lounging, and binging a period drama between tasks.</p><p>Sometime after, when it was dark, except for the glow of a paused program on the television, Fae waited in the living room while Hilda went to change into more comfortable nightclothes. She returned in fleece pajamas, pink with white stars, and Fae squealed encouragingly, “Oh, these are cute!”</p><p>Hilda laughed as Fae sat up with interest at the edge of the couch, reaching out their hands to pull her into an embrace, sliding them over the soft itch of the material, squeezing the side of her ass once teasingly as they asked, “They’re comfy right, and not just performative?”</p><p>Hilda laughed harder as she flopped onto the couch by Fae’s side, admitting, “I <em> do </em> have performative nightclothes,” she slid her hand across their shoulder, bare from the tank top they were wearing, and teased, “and you may one day see them,” before she snapped her hand away and reassured them, “but no, these are <em> very </em> comfortable.”</p><p>Fae hummed appreciatively and leaned into Hilda, letting her orient her breast and her arm so that Fae could rest their head on the front of her shoulder.</p><p>“I actually got them last New Year’s.” Hilda’s hand crept around Fae’s waist as her tone changed, obviously reminded of the event and not premeditating the story. “A group of us went to Claude and Lorenz’s to watch a bunch of old movies, and start the new year with Young Frankenstein. We all got new pajamas for the occasion and ate … <em> so </em> many chocolate covered pretzels.”</p><p>Fae giggled with Hilda and spread her fingers out with their own, playing with her hand as they asked, nose wrinkled, worried they should have known the answer, “So how long have you known those boys anyway?”</p><p>“Since high school.” Hilda answered instantly, thinking nothing of that information. She bit her bottom lip and assessed Fae, realizing that she hadn’t ever previously had to tell someone who hadn’t known, “I dated Lorenz.”</p><p>“Really?” Fae squeezed upon Hilda’s hand, sitting up a little in interest, before trying to settle again, casually. “Was he as neurotic then?”</p><p>“Worse,” Hilda confessed, widening her eyes, and Fae smiled, as it felt obvious that she was still sympathetic to Lorenz’s anxieties. With a deep sigh, Hilda bounced their hands together. “He was just as dedicated then though — Goddess, and he had terrible hair.”</p><p>Fae sat up as Hilda’s laughter shook her whole body, upon which they had still been resting their head. Their cheeks stung from smiling so long, tickled by her joy and throughout the day. To relieve the sting, they pinched their face into a pucker to kiss Hilda’s cheek a few times before giggling too. “Who didn’t have terrible hair in high school?”</p><p>“<em>Me</em>,” Hilda said forcefully, raising a hand in mock affront, “but that just meant I was embarrassing in a different way.” Fae raised an interested eyebrow, but Hilda simply turned her palm from her heart to face out towards them. “It wouldn’t be inaccurate to say that I’ve known Claude and Lorenz since the three of us were embarrassing.”</p><p>“You think you’re not embarrassing now?” Fae teased, reaching across to grab Hilda’s side, pressing their face back against her neck, giggling as she squirmed.</p><p>“Fuck off!” she laughed, her amusement stuttering into a whine as Fae kissed and licked her neck, nosing the underside of her ear thoughtfully as the mood slowed down.</p><p>Fae’s hand tightened on the side of Hilda’s waist as they leaned back to let their gaze flit up and down her flush expression. They kissed her deeply, moving their hand up to cradle the side of her face, stroking their thumb under her chin, pleased and comfortable when they pulled away, their brow furrowed.</p><p>“How did Lorenz end up with Claude, if he was dating you?”</p><p>Hilda rolled her eyes and looked away, obviously soft, full of love and irritation. “We dated until we knew we weren’t soulmates.” She looked Fae in the eye, knowing that this revealed a relationship of years, curious to see how they reacted, if they reacted, both to this and her impending admission. They simply seemed empathetic, patient. “I ended it because, well … I guess I thought that was important at the time.”</p><p>Letting their hand fall from Hilda’s cheek to the front of her breastbone, Fae tried to communicate their understanding with a smile. Many people, their age and older, <em> still </em> thought this was important. They rubbed their thumb back and forth in time with Hilda’s heartbeat as they took a moment, to try to redirect any lingering sadness Hilda might have about such an end, to separate the hurt from herself rather than Lorenz. “I imagine he was heartbroken.”</p><p>Hilda still heard the true question, ‘Were you heartbroken?’ And she hiccupped a little laugh, reaching up to grab at Fae’s wrist as she agreed to both implications, “We were.”</p><p>She sighed and leaned back into the couch, looking up at the ceiling as she confided, “He … he slept with Claude after that.” <em> ‘My best friend,’ </em> went unsaid, but not uncommunicated in her tone and body language, although it also felt clearly implied that he might’ve been Lorenz’s also. Hilda’s smile was genuine though, as she blinked back tears and turned her head on the cushions to look at Fae, amusement, and maybe pride, seeping into her expression. “It was the first impulsive decision he ever made.”</p><p>Fae’s brow was still twisted in a frown however. They let their hand slide back up to the side of Hilda’s neck and encouraged her to lean her head forward long enough to slide their opposite arm between her and the couch, encroaching on her space in a way that was warm and comfortable. “That must’ve hurt.”</p><p>“No,” Hilda peeped, before tilting her head in a thoughtful way, “or well … not as much as I thought it would.” She moved her closer hand to Fae’s thigh and squeezed. “I loved them. Still do.” Any signs of inner turmoil seemed to melt off Hilda and her teeth glowed in the darkness as the television fell asleep. Fae kissed her again in the black of the room, illuminated only by the pale glow of streetlights seven stories down.</p><p>“It set Lorenz down a good path,” Hilda said affectionately, and Fae hummed, moving their hand from her neck through locks of long pink hair. They sat back from where they’d wrapped themselves around Hilda, keeping their arm behind her neck, happy to listen to her personal tale, to anything about her that she was willing to share.</p><p>Turning to follow Fae, Hilda tried to show her continued interest, despite her mind still following the thread of her story, rather than focusing solely on the heavy attraction between them. She wrapped her arm around Fae’s and leaned her head on her palm, her weight on her elbow against the back of the couch. “He dropped out of the medical program his father had set him up in, started living on his own terms.”</p><p>Hilda shifted closer, tangling a leg around Fae’s closer knee, her eyes flashing up to their face. “It is hard to see them sometimes,” glad of the darkness, Hilda blushed, “but only because they’re both so beautiful.”</p><p>She was relieved, and laughed when Fae tossed their head back in an exaggerated grunt of approval. “So beautiful,” they agreed.</p><p>Hilda answered with a purr of her own, putting the fingertips of her far hand on the front of Fae’s shoulder in a stuttered caress. She grate her teeth over her plush bottom lip, before whispering, “Sometimes, we’ll have a particularly lucrative client, and Claude will like, clean up <em> real </em> nice.”</p><p>“Mmm,” Fae hummed, trailing their hand down Hilda’s shoulder to her elbow. “He makes it hard to focus?”</p><p>“I’m a professional,” Hilda objected with a sarcastic smile, pulling her hand away, which Fae promptly caught.</p><p>“You think?” they asked, their voice dark, guiding Hilda’s hand close to them. “There’s nothing I could wear,” they kissed the back of her hand, “or do,” and then the front of her hand, “or say,” and then the inside of her wrist, “that might unbalance you in a professional setting?”</p><p>Warmth spread through Hilda from a few different sources, the most prominent of which not being the flush of her cheeks as she moved to swing her leg around Fae’s middle, sitting in their lap as she chided and ground her body downwards, “You’re so bad.”</p><p>Fae smiled into Hilda’s kisses, licking aloe and mint off her lips and tongue as they grabbed at the swell of her ass, “And these pajamas fit you so good.”</p><p>“You can’t even see them,” Hilda hissed through soft laughter, kissing their temple.</p><p>“If only I had Lorenz’s large hands,” Fae teased, unabated, “I might be able to get a decent handful.”</p><p>“You’re so bad!” Hilda insisted more emphatically, leaning her torso away and sliding her hips closer to Fae’s middle.</p><p>“Sorry,” Fae chuckled, sliding a hand up the back of Hilda’s pajama top. “How can I be <em> good </em> for you, sweetheart?”</p><p>“Kiss me,” Hilda ordered, sliding her body across Fae so that their knees were knocked together as Hilda curled her whole body down to meet Fae’s mouth. They murmured in approval, cradling Hilda as they indulged her.</p><p>When Hilda finally pulled away, their eyes had grown accustomed to the low level of light, and Hilda could see that Fae’s green eyes were wide and dark in the din.</p><p>“I brought my strap.”</p><p>Hilda’s mouth snapped closed, smiling and wide-eyed for long enough to dispel Fae’s apprehension about their admission.</p><p>“Let me see,” Hilda pleaded, squeezing her knees together a few times so that she bounced in her sprawled position in Fae’s lap.</p><p>With a nod, Fae reached for their backpack and Hilda slid to their opposite side, once again sitting on the couch as Fae offered her the strap-on. The harness was soft and black, wove with elastic and held together with metal clasps, one such metal ring holding the pale peach dildo in place. The phallus was firm, with a slight give on the surface around whatever kept its solid shape beneath the silicone, doing a … mediocre job of mimicry, but a stellar job of sensory pleasure.</p><p>Hilda smiled as she noticed Fae watching her examine the plaything, and gripped it in a way that was less exploratory, more suggestive.</p><p>“Up to par?” Fae asked, bending their elbow around Hilda’s shoulders.</p><p>Hilda couldn’t help a giggle, leaning over to kiss Fae’s lips before answering, “Oh yeah.” She hesitated. “This’ll be fun for you too?”</p><p>Fae blushed and stroked a single finger down the side of Hilda’s neck as they promised, “Absolutely.”</p><p>Hilda kissed them again, which was as much an invitation as the pull upon their hand, as she led them to her bedroom, where the pair pulled and pressed at layers of clothing, kissing and caressing each other as their skin was exposed.</p><p>Fae was scratching across Hilda’s scalp as she knelt before them, kissing down from their upper thighs, chasing the slide of their undergarments down to their knees.</p><p>Looking up at them through thick lashes, Hilda begged, “Give me some gloves. I want to touch you.”</p><p>Helping them step out of the last of their clothing, Hilda slid her hands back and around their knees and calves as Fae pivoted to hand her some packets from their backpack. Giddy, and careful, Hilda wrapped her right hand in a glove and left a biting kiss on the front of their thigh as she wiggled an eager fingertip up between their lips a few times. She took this opportunity to suck and lap her relaxed tongue across the soft skin on the inside of their leg, taking advantage of this opportunity now, before they were enough of a mess that Fae might complain about it, slowly adjusting her hand to gently pinch their lips together just shy of their clit.</p><p>Rolling her thumb over their clit, Hilda pulled away in a shiver as Fae cooed above her. She bit their leg once more as she stood, rubbing the inside of her fingers back and forth across their sex, smiling when they wrapped their hands around her lower back and leaned into it.</p><p>“Goddess, I can’t wait to taste you,” Hilda growled, leaning in to kiss Fae’s lips, and then their chin, and throat, while they whined in approval.</p><p>“Hilda,” Fae whimpered, bending their knees and shifting their pelvis away from her touch as she made a noise of protest. When their eyes met, the pair giggled. With a kiss, Fae moved one of their hands up to straighten Hilda’s hair and purred appreciatively as Hilda pulled her glove off and away, conceding their direction even before Fae had to ask, "Lay down for me?"</p><p>A moment later Hilda was sprawled naked in her bed, Fae crawling over her, clad in a thong and their strap-on, and a nitrile glove on their left hand.</p><p>With their right hand, they reached out to help Hilda curl her hair over her shoulder.</p><p>"You look good," Fae whispered.</p><p>Hilda touched her chin absently, moving her upper arms to better frame her heavy breasts, seemingly made more self-conscious by the statement than assured. Pouting, Fae wrapped their bare hand around Hilda’s back as they shook their head, "Let me rephrase."</p><p>They leaned down into her, letting the cool phallus bump down against Hilda's mound and stomach, bringing their mouth close to her ear as they groaned appreciatively, pinching at a nipple with their gloved hand.</p><p>"You're fucking hot as shit." They ran their tongue along the shell of her ear and rolled their hips down twice, as they begged, "I want to be good for you."</p><p>A leg wrapped around Fae's lower back and they smiled in relief. They leaned away to look down at Hilda's soft blush, into her calculating eyes, and shifted in her arms until they could trail kisses from her lips down her chest, sucking and mouthing at her breasts as their gloved hand gripped her thick thighs so that they could support themselves in Hilda's warm embrace.</p><p>Fae's body felt strong and sturdy, firm muscles and large breasts offering a satisfying bounce of resistance beneath Hilda's hands, between Hilda's legs. It was no more awkward than making out with someone with a natural hard on.</p><p>By the time Fae had two fingers teasing at Hilda's entrance, all of Hilda's insecurities were long forgotten, and she pulled away from one of their deep kisses to gasp as she undulated towards their touch.</p><p>As Fae started to finger Hilda they made a mental note to do exactly this again sometime when they had perspective on the soft roll of Hilda's stomach. Instead, they were currently panting across Hilda's jaw, mouth slack and open as they gave her room to groan and speak, their chest pressed solidly against hers. They slid their bare hand down the curve of her spine to grip her ass, steadying the pair of them and giving Fae a ballast upon which to balance themselves as they kept their hips raised and the strap-on out of the way of their other fun.</p><p>"You want to come first?" Fae asked, a deep tone in their voice as they curled their fingers.</p><p>"Oh, hohohohoho," Hilda answered, her response not quite laughter, and also two or three octaves deeper than her usual airy cadence. Fae let up and extracted their hand to rub the pads of their first three fingers around her clit, slow and steadfast.</p><p>"I mean ..." Hilda sighed, her body jolting once with the memory of pleasure, so that her head twitched back, exposing the beautiful expanse of her neck. "I'd like that."</p><p>"Should I grab a second glove?" Fae offered.</p><p>"No, I'll help you, if you need it," Hilda said, breathy and blushing, taunting and sexy in a way that made Fae smile.</p><p>"Fuck that," they growled, moving to sit back on their heels as they laid their hand flat on Hilda's mound, grinding the base of their palm against her pussy. "Play with me. Touch yourself."</p><p>Hilda's hesitant expression and stationary hands were very telling, and so Fae popped a shoulder forward in response, looking down at where Hilda's hand rested upon it, and then flashed their gaze to meet her eyes, offering silent instruction. Hilda lifted that hand up to Fae's cheek, and Fae turned their head to kiss her palm before leaning the weight of their head into her hand as they insisted, "It's not selfish. You deserve to feel good. But you don't have to if you don't want to."</p><p>Hilda started to nod, but stopped short, her pupils dilating and her smile growing darker as she instructed, "Open your mouth."</p><p>Surprised, but interested, Fae easily complied and Hilda trailed a finger along the base of their bottom lip as she assured them, "I haven't touched myself yet..." She raised her hand in front of them as she asked, "May I?"</p><p>Fae couldn't help a smile, nodding as they accepted two and then three of Hilda's fingers in their mouth, pressing and prodding down across their tongue as they sucked upon the digits. Their eyes flickered down to where their fingers played along the lips of Hilda's satin sex for just a moment, ensuring their positioning as Hilda's free hand trailed down across her stomach in a tantilizing way, before they focused their gaze on Hilda's rapt expression. They closed their eyes for the duration of a short moan that they purred around the fingers in their mouth, as they wondered whether any lover they'd ever had had looked at them the way Hilda did just now.</p><p>They gasped, chasing the fingertips with their tongue when Hilda pulled her hand away, and then groaned in time with Hilda's pleased cry as she slid the wet digits between her lips and around her clit. Fae's fingers pumped with more purpose now as Hilda's moans and little words of affirmation filled the air and her wet pussy relaxed with every well-placed stroke.</p><p>"Yes, yes," Hilda chanted, rolling her pelvis so Fae's fingers found the front wall of her cunt more forcefully. "Fuck ... Fae. I'm cumming."</p><p>Fae grit their teeth and continued the motion at a more rapid pace until Hilda was looking a little cross-eyed and very fulfilled. With a lick of their lips, Fae moved their bare hand to the side of Hilda's thigh, finding a dimple with the tip of their middle finger, and squeezing a few times to ensure their partner's attention.</p><p>"You ready for my cock?"</p><p>After a few gulping breaths Hilda was laughing, rolling her head back against the pillow in one direction and then another in a display of anticipation.</p><p>"Just a minute," she said finally.</p><p>"Okay, well that's still a yes," Fae teased, moving out of position to wrap a condom over their strap-on. As they returned, Hilda was propping up her waist on a throw pillow, knees pressed together, that parted easily when Fae covered them with their hands and rolled them to Hilda's sides.</p><p>"Talk to me throughout. Tell me if you don't like it," Fae begged. "We can do anything else, if you don't like it. Okay?"</p><p>With a nod, Hilda reached up as if to hold Fae's neck, and they leaned away, realizing the dilemma they'd put them in by agreeing to let Hilda touch herself. Hilda's eyes blew wide as she realized too.</p><p>"Oh no," she whined.</p><p>"Hold your thighs open," Fae suggested. "We can make this work."</p><p>Hilda nodded enthusiastically and did as she was told, rocking her body towards Fae's. She licked her lips and hissed, "Now fuck me."</p><p>Fae chuckled softly and reached down with their gloved hand to find and prod at Hilda's velveteen entrance before steadying the strap-on and nudging the tip against her wet lips.</p><p>"Oh, Goddess," Hilda groaned, sounding uncomfortable, which was a little strange as they hadn't even really begun, but Fae pulled away quickly.</p><p>"What's wrong?"</p><p>"That was an embarrassing noise," Hilda laughed.</p><p>"You're fine." Fae promised, laughing too, tossing their head back in mock exaggeration. They blew her a kiss and reached down to touch Hilda again, growling, "Great. Perfect."</p><p>Hilda's face was slowly growing more and more rosey, and Fae had to be sure that it wasn't <em> only </em> from embarrassment. "You're feeling good?" they asked as they pressed the head of the strap-on down against her cunt.</p><p>"Yes," Hilda huffed, her face going tight in concentration.</p><p>Fae shifted lower on the bed, smiling as they whispered, "Okay."</p><p>Slowly, they sunk into Hilda, holding the base of the shaft so that they could keep steady as they rocked the tip in and out in a way that gave Hilda cause to whine and bounce her feet back and forth. Assured, Fae brought their hand back to hold the balls on the strap-on and jut themselves forwards so more than half of the false cock found Hilda's depths. The moan they were rewarded with was sexy and arousing, and encouraged them to fall forward, carefully, aware of their weight despite feeling light as a cloud, their ungloved hand finding the bed by Hilda's side, propping them up as they found a pace and position.</p><p>Hilda was panting, caught open with her hands on the inside of her knees as Fae's mouth and elbow guided her breast to their kisses.</p><p>"Good?"</p><p>"Yes, fuck. Faster."</p><p>"Shit," Fae groaned, pistoning their hips in quick, short bursts as they moved to comply. Mouthing and sucking at Hilda's breasts as they continued their momentum.</p><p>"Oh, that's sooooo nice," Hilda whined. "Deeper. I ... I need ..."</p><p>Smiling, Fae licked a stripe across Hilda's breast to her collarbone, making eye contact as they adjusted their position again. Hilda's eyes widened and Fae pressed their gloved hand atop her mound, their expression questioning until Hilda was nodding, licking her lips.</p><p>"Just let me know if I go too deep," Fae asked, rubbing the edge of their thumb against Hilda's clit as they shifted back and forth, a little deeper each time, pressing their fingers on the top of her mound, in opposition to the pressure from the strap-on.</p><p>"I'm going to hold the sheets," Hilda said, half as a question and half as a warning, and Fae slowed just enough to kiss her lips and nod. Freed of her grasp, Hilda's legs tangled up behind Fae's upper back and they both moaned.</p><p>Hilda gasped, "Oh, you're ... you're feeling good too?"</p><p>"You're so fucking hot, Hilda. How could I not?" Fae said with a soft laugh, panting into the side of her face as their legs burned from the repetition. "But also yes, the ... thrusting, or whatever — humping you, feels fucking good." They kissed her cheek and nuzzled into her as they moaned again, Hilda hands crumpling in the sheets with a soft noise as she rolled her body up to meet Fae's pace, now slow and hard as they tangled and untangled their bodies, Fae's bare hand caressing up and down Hilda's ribs and arm.</p><p>Moaning pleasure and promises, they kept eye contact even as Hilda started jittering her whole body in short, fast bounces, chasing an orgasm and pulling the sheet off the bed.</p><p>When Hilda started to melt and relax at the end of her outburst, Fae moved away to sit up again, their hands on the sides of either of Hilda's legs as they gave themselves room to answer her motion with their own surge of energy.</p><p>"Yes! Oh, Goddess! Ah-ah-nah-ah," Hilda continued, grunting between each euphoric thrust, her hands scrambling back on the sheets as she tossed her head back and bowed her back, being hurdled into a second skipping climax.</p><p>Fae let their brow knit in concentration, a little worried about their expression as they were also certainly smiling, and unable to stop. Regardless, they grunted into the exertion and kept it up until Hilda's lips were slack and trembling, her body twitching every few seconds even as they came to a stop.</p><p>"More?" Fae asked after a long gulp of air, and Hilda gave an arrested giggle.</p><p>"I won't have the energy to get you back if we keep it up," she whispered, rolling her shoulders on the pillows.</p><p>"I'm ... You don't need to worry about me, Hilda."</p><p>"Shush. No, I'm ... I'm all fucked out," she insisted, winking one eye into focus so that Fae was nodding in understanding.</p><p>"Alright," they agreed, sliding back so that the strap-on slipped from Hilda, releasing her from her pinned position.</p><p>Her hands still at her sides, Hilda sat up to meet Fae in long, open-mouthed kisses. They pulled off their glove and brought their arms around her back, cradling her close, petting at her hair and running their nails down the back of her neck, before reaching down to fiddle with the clasps of their harness and leaning their neck towards Hilda's biting mouth.</p><p>"Get me more gloves," Hilda growled, her breath hot on Fae's ear.</p><p>They pulled themselves out of the strap-on as they stood, throwing out the condom and tossing the rest of it in a plastic bag for further cleaning later, leaning back to hand Hilda two new gloves as they hooked their thumbs under the waistband of their thong.</p><p>"No, wear it," Hilda said, her voice teasing, biting her tongue as she wobbled her head excitedly when Fae gave her a questioning look. "Come get on your knees for me."</p><p>Fae took another moment to catch their breath, stunned and struck by Hilda's motivation and beauty. With a blush, they crawled upon the bed and reached for the pillow that had cushioned Hilda's head and tucked it under their breasts.</p><p>"Fuck. You look so good," Hilda insisted, moving to sit on her feet by Fae's side. She ran her fingers over the more prominent muscles on their back, before curling her hands into gentle claws, grabbing the base of their ass and sliding her grip up to their lower back, letting the fat bulge and release, playing with their body.</p><p>"Should I hit you?"</p><p>"Yeah, you can spank me," Fae answered, wiggling their hips back and forth invitingly, their expression and choice of words teasing Hilda's failure to ask.</p><p>Hilda looked at them with a tantalizing smile, as she promised, "Oh, you're going to get it."</p><p>"Yeah?" Fae prodded.</p><p>Hilda pulled both hands away, and brought her right hand down across Fae's ass forcefully, so that Fae squeaked in surprise. "Yeah," she repeated, smoothing her hand over where she'd made contact, sliding her fingertips to rub and prod at Fae's wet pussy through the material of the thong.</p><p>"Gloves!" Fae peeped.</p><p>Hilda pouted, moving her hand back to the curve of Fae's ass. "I’m sorry."</p><p>"I know we’re probably fine .... but—"</p><p>"I know," Hilda said, apologetic, grabbing the material of the thong instead and pulling upwards. "I won't touch your pussy again until I put gloves on," she agreed. "What about the hit, though? The spank," she corrected. "Are we good?"</p><p>Fae turned their head over their shoulder to look up at Hilda, red-faced and biting their lips as they nodded. "We're good, Hilda."</p><p>Hilda spanked them a few more times, teasing them, and herself, with the fabric of their clothing, until she was scrambling with the packets to clad herself in gloves so that she could rub solid, insistent circles on Fae's clit as she settled behind them, between their legs. She directed their hips higher, fucking her hand down into Fae's wet pussy, groaning once in frustration as again she longed to run her tongue along their sex, settling for groaning encouragements as Fae started to bounce back into the stimulation from how they'd been bracing themselves on the bed.</p><p>"Fuuuuuck. Fuck yes. Fuck yes, Hilda. Fuck," Fae whimpered, their babbling quickly followed up with by a low-pitched, gutteral, "<b>Oh.</b>"</p><p>Hilda was forcing her fingers deep and tapping her fingertips downwards in firm, rapid movements, her opposite hand pinching and tugging softly on one of Fae's vaginal lips.</p><p>"Yeah?" Hilda teased, and this time Fae couldn't even answer in words, moaning and whining as they ground themselves back into Hilda's touch. "Oh, yeah, Fae, sweetheart. Just like that."</p><p>Hilda rolled her fingers around, moving her wrist back and forth lovingly, until Fae's moans were ceding, their lips clamped shut as they groaned through harsh breaths, shivering as they came down from their high. As Hilda released them, she leaned forwards until she could trail kisses along their back and their hip, and spank them once more for good measure, just before she lost balance and fell face first into Fae's shoulder with a soft clunk.</p><p>"Ow," Hilda whined, laughing with Fae as she rolled onto her side next to them. "Do you want more?"</p><p>Still laughing, Fae reached out to take Hilda's face in their hands, pulling her into long kisses, that started on her lips, and found her tongue, before fluttering away into soft little pecks around her cheeks and forehead, in search of wherever she may have bumped herself.</p><p>"No," Fae hummed finally, "no, I'm—" Fae huffed out a satisfied breath of air, "I want to wash up and cuddle."</p><p>Hilda's bright eyes shone as she agreed, "Me too."</p><p>Happily, Fae rest their forehead against Hilda's for a second, and found themselves wondering what it would be like in a few weeks, tested and clean, and able to touch each other more directly. They felt on the verge of declaring their love to Hilda even now, after three days — and four years, granted; but it still felt far too soon, irrational when she could find her soulmate at any moment. <em> 'One day, she will find them. And it will never have been you,' </em> Fae’s internal monologue supplied unhelpfully.</p><p>"Hilda," Fae whispered.</p><p>"Mm?"</p><p>They hesitated. "Thank you, for asking me out." It was the safest admission.</p><p>Hilda's smile brightened, "It's been, <em> entirely</em>, my pleasure."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Okay, unlike the other stuff I've written, this soulmate au has an honest-to-goodness outline. By this point we are 3,968/7,314 into the outline, and I'm 1.3k into a draft of chapter 11, but it felt appropriate to post these first 10 chapters on Valentine's day. Also, anyone waiting on Just Go With It can rest assured I intend to finish it and have an outline of a little over 3k for the following chapter of that mess. Thank you so much for reading! I'd especially love a comment on this fic to continue my motivation! (: Hope you're enjoying it!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Secrets I Have Held In My Heart</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"REALLY?!?!"</p>
<p>Claude pulled the phone far from his ear, cursing softly, smiling as he squinted through the shrill excitement pouring out the device. It was three weeks since Hilda's unexpected morning phone call, and just about as long evaluating Dorothea Arnault's life and confidants. It was relatively soon, given her extenuating circumstances, to be claiming confidence in assessing who her soulmate was, but when faced with the alternatives ... Claude felt there really was none. <em> 'Bad. You have a bad track record. Your feelings don't inspire confidence lately.' </em></p>
<p>"Yes," Claude answered Dorothea, regardless, a soft laugh escaping him as her enthusiasm manifested in another exclamation of glee. "Do you want me to tell you now, or—?"</p>
<p>"No!" she chimed in, and then composed herself so that Claude could almost hold the phone at a regular distance from himself. "No, no. I just need a minute."</p>
<p>"Most people do," he agreed, kind and professional, leaning back at his desk. He twirled his fidget spinner in his left hand, letting the moment drag on before offering, "Would you like to make an appointment to come in?"</p>
<p>That was more rare. People couldn't wait, and Claude couldn't blame them. However, with as guarded as Dorothea was, it wouldn't be unthinkable that she might want the news delivered in person.</p>
<p>"Oh," she peeped, thoughtful, and Claude clasped his toy, thinking he had the right of it. "Well, would it be possible for you to come see me sooner?"</p>
<p>"I..." he hesitated. He hadn't expected that. It was a Friday evening, and she surely had plans or business that he didn't actually want to be a part of, and he was even less enthusiastic over the idea of doing this on the weekend. Even so, he couldn't deny the allure of billable hours. "Maybe. You sure you want to pay for me to come off the clock?"</p>
<p>"Absolutely," Dorothea answered instantly, and he could hear people trying to get her attention in the background. "If I text you an address in the west end, do you think you could be here before six?"</p>
<p>It was already four-thirty, and so Claude was standing as he agreed, "Sure. I'll see you soon, Ms Arnault."</p>
<p>"Ah!" she squealed again. "Thank you. I'll be waiting. Bye!"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Claude let Hilda know that she could leave early, or at any time, because he'd just head home after this errand. He could tell she was worrying about him, from the twitch in her lips to the practiced calm of her brow, but she didn't ask, and so he didn't have to insist he was fine as he left.</p>
<p>There would be fewer and less excuses to keep from seeking his soulmate soon.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Dorothea had texted an address and a sentence that was mispunctuated to the point that Claude had to wonder whether it had been intentional or not, assuring him that he'd be expected by the man at the door, and that wasn't comforting — security hated him, and he hated security. The area of the town was rich, the buildings more and more separated by greenery and acreage. His destination was an old brick construction with three outstanding balconies, intimidating beyond his other distractions.</p>
<p>Claude adjusted the collar of his dress shirt to fold more neatly over the neck of his bronze sweater, and fumbled with a stack of junk and old enveloppes in search of a comb he knew he had somewhere. Hoping to make himself marginally more presentable, before facing the doors and whatever lay beyond.</p>
<p>To his relief, the man at the door seemed uninterested in his arrival, and Claude was directed to the back of the building, where it looked ... something like a garden party. Music played from somewhere, and people were drinking and laughing. Claude found an empty bench and texted Dorothea again.</p>
<p>The arrival of the starlet was impossible to miss, as people in the courtyard tried to take subtle photos and recordings, to the point where some of them were even being approached by security. Her dress flowered out below her knees, and fit snug over the rest of her. Maroon and sheer in a way that offered the illusion of a bust, of bare arms. Dark red gloves covering her hands. Claude wondered if her whole wardrobe would change when she no longer needed to fear the touch of a stranger, or if she'd still have to dress to avoid disrespectful, grabby hands.</p>
<p>"Claude," she greeted, holding out a hand and shaking her head to keep him from standing. "I'm so relieved you made it," she said, earnest in tone and expression as she sat next to him. "No trouble at the door?"</p>
<p>"No, no trouble," he said, smiling, almost genuine as Dorothea's hesitant excitement, and enthralling presence was hard to resist. He gestured at the crowds, hovering, surely gossipping about their meeting as he admit, "This isn't ... what I was expecting."</p>
<p>Dorothea laughed, but it was empty, nervous. "You'll forgive me if I really hope that I'm not saying that in a minute."</p>
<p>Claude rolled his eyes and shook his head, winking at her assuringly, "The universe aims to please. I wouldn't be worried."</p>
<p><em> 'How many lies was that,' </em> he wondered. <em> 'And in one sentence too. At least I don't have to worry about her soulmate. She must know who it is, some part of her, knowing her as well as she does.' </em></p>
<p>Dorothea leaned back on her wrists, and Claude wondered if any of the photos people were taking might actually affect him in any way. He blushed and opened his mouth to speak, but was interrupted as Dorothea said, commanding, "Tell me."</p>
<p>Closing his mouth into a smile, Claude looked out over the crowds, sighing when he caught sight of the suspect in question, the Brigidian with long purple hair who kept renewing a work visa to manage the theatre that hosted Dorothea's latest performances.</p>
<p>"She's here," Claude said softly, nodding at Dorothea.</p>
<p>"She?" Dorothea echoed with a pop of her shoulders, pursing her lips as she followed Claude's line of sight. Her expression tightened and her voice was stern as she warned, "Claude."</p>
<p>
  <em> 'Fuck. Does the Brigidian already know who her soulmate is? Did I miss it?' </em>
</p>
<p>He swallowed. "What's wrong?"</p>
<p>"I just..." Dorothea clenched her fists into her lap as she sat up. "I think—"</p>
<p>Claude could see the rest of her sentence: 'I think you're wrong.' However, he could also see some familiar lines of worry on Dorothea's face. She obviously cared for this other woman, in a way that she had expected to remain distanced. It was tempting to guess at the problem, and to offer petty, personal assurances, <em> 'She's not straight. You are worthy.' </em> Yet Claude relaxed, and distanced himself as he chose the more professional line of reasoning.</p>
<p>"I've seen your interactions. I've reviewed her social media." Dorothea's eyes flashed over to him then and he grinned, wondering what she thought that meant. "If I'm wrong, then I won't even charge you for my visit this evening," he knew this was a mistake, but his reputation was on the line now, "and I'll be right back to working for you tomorrow."</p>
<p>
  <em> 'Or Monday.' </em>
</p>
<p>Dorothea squinted at him skeptically, as if hearing this last thought, and Claude had the decency to bow his head and raise a hand in deference. With a sigh, Dorothea got to her feet and called out her friend's name, her voice shaking only slightly, "Petra?"</p>
<p>Petra turned to Dorothea with a look of innocent confusion, as Dorothea stripped herself of her gloves and strode across the courtyard. Whatever Dorothea whispered to Petra was lost to distance, but Claude found that he couldn't look away as she raised her bare hands and gently took the sides of Petra's face between them. Red on Dorothea's arm, and magenta on Petra's neck, came alight in vibrant relief, and they were shocked, stunned, laughing and crying, resting their foreheads together and adjusting long wavy hair around their faces.</p>
<p>Claude wanted to run, but more than that, he wanted everyone to run, or leave, at least. Guilt coiled inside him as if he were somehow exposing this very intimate moment of theirs by agreeing to meet Dorothea here. He swallowed, mouth dry, when she looked back at him, mouthing thank you before she and Petra were striding away into the building. He suspected they had much to discuss, and less to say, as they sought some privacy.</p>
<p>He needed some too, and was happy to leave the gossiping garden party behind. It felt like he lost a few minutes, as he stood by his car, hand on the handle for the passenger seat. The wheel was on the opposite side in Almyra, and this was a mistake he hadn't made since he'd been about sixteen years old, and suddenly he felt like that naive, lost, romantic, idealistic child, and he was crying.</p>
<p>Frustrated, Claude got into the passenger seat, and sat with his head in his hands. He thought of the way Petra's face lit up when Dorothea touched her. No matter the words he'd been unable to hear her say, 'It's you,' was written all over her face. He wanted that. He didn't. He couldn't. Because his soulmate would never bring relief.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>When Claude had texted to say that he would be late, and why, Lorenz had quickly made a trip to and from a nearby grocer to buy a pre-cooked chicken he could pull apart, and a bag of frozen home fries to act as a bed under the meat and a jar of curry. He wanted dinner to be convenient, fast enough to be ready by the time Claude did show up, yet complicated enough to distract him from thinking too hard, and, if possible, hearty enough to act as comfort food.</p>
<p>He had expected Claude to be worn out when he arrived, but he hadn't anticipated that hollow smile on his face when he broached the door.</p>
<p>"Oh," Claude greeted, as if that were any sort of greeting, "something smells good."</p>
<p>Lorenz grimaced, his gaze fluttering over Claude's clothing and posture, but what he was looking for he couldn't say. "It isn't much." He took a step forward. "How did it go?"</p>
<p>"What do you mean?" Claude laughed, winking, smooth and calm. "Another satisfied customer, of course."</p>
<p>"Of course," Lorenz repeated, taking Claude by the hands and bringing him to the couch, letting Claude put on an air of confusion, but Lorenz was practiced at seeing through this mask by now. He suspected Claude was barely holding together.</p>
<p>With a roll of his eyes, Lorenz wrapped his hands around Claude's head and neck, pulling him forward until his temple was on his chest. Silent for a moment, still and awkward, Claude started to say, "I—"</p>
<p>"Not now," Lorenz insisted, pressing the side of his chin against Claude's head, adjusting his arms around Claude’s shoulders. "Let me hold you."</p>
<p>Claude didn't say any more, but his determination to maintain his fraudulent calm made Lorenz nervous about his insistence. He hadn't meant to be anything other than supportive. The quiet dragged on, until the soft shuffle of Lorenz's shirt whispered in the air as Claude closed a fist on the material.</p>
<p>Relieved that he could still be trusted enough for this, Lorenz tightened his grip as Claude started to tremble.</p>
<p>"You think after four years of cohabitation I wouldn't instantly see how upset you were?" Lorenz asked. His tone growing more desperate, "You think that if I couldn't see how upset you were that I wouldn't want to know?"</p>
<p>"I can't have a serious conversation right now," Claude said, his voice airy and sad, and Lorenz's mouth tightened.</p>
<p>"You're right. I'm sorry. I'm here for you." He scratched Claude's back as much as his layers would allow. "Should I get the food?"</p>
<p>Claude's cellphone rang before he could answer, a marimba version of Despacito, making him huff an amused breath of air through his nose, and bringing a smile to Lorenz's face. Lorenz pressed a kiss to Claude's forehead, and untangled himself to do what he'd suggested, as Claude answered his phone.</p>
<p>"Hey Hilda."</p>
<p>"Claude!" she exclaimed, sounding happy, maybe relieved. "So, was our sleuthing successful?"</p>
<p>"Yeah," he answered, nodding, scooching himself closer to the edge of his seat, "Petra and Dorothea looked really happy together."</p>
<p>Hilda paused just shy of long enough for Claude to raise an eyebrow. "So, Fae and I were going to celebrate at this club tonight, right?"</p>
<p>Claude accepted the bowl of food Lorenz was offering him with a nod. "Makes sense."</p>
<p>"Well there was a small fire, and now that whole place has been evacuated."</p>
<p>The look of confusion that clouded Claude's face had Lorenz meet his eyes in concern. "Are you okay?"</p>
<p>"Yes, yes," Hilda said absently, so that Claude shook his head at Lorenz to relieve him, "but we were wondering if you guys wanted to hang out instead? Celebrate another victory, and drink to fuck-off-soulmates?"</p>
<p>Claude's face fell again. "You want to come over?" he reiterated. "I ... I don't know if I can—"</p>
<p>But Lorenz was sitting next to him, and plucking the cellphone from his fingers. Claude grimaced.</p>
<p>"Hi Hilda," Lorenz greeted softly.</p>
<p>"Lorenz!" she cheered. He smiled.</p>
<p>"Can you give us an hour?"</p>
<p>"Of course," she insisted, bright, before her voice lowered to a whisper, as if Claude might hear. "Is he really rough?"</p>
<p>"Yes," Lorenz said casually, leading into his next sentence with as much nonchalance as he could muster. "So we'll expect you around ten then?"</p>
<p>"Lorenz," Claude whined, but Lorenz was answering Hilda.</p>
<p>"Sounds good. Drive safe."</p>
<p>"Lorenz," Claude repeated, as long slender fingers curled around his arm, squeezing.</p>
<p>"Eat," Lorenz implored, placing the phone upon the table. "And then get a shower." He smiled gently. "You could do with the company."</p>
<p>Claude sighed, nodding, knowing it was true, both that he could use the distraction, and that Fae and Hilda would be good company. They'd been over enough the past three weeks that they'd even finished two seasons of a series together besides the conversation and silliness they’d shared. It felt comfortable to be around them, as they too pursued something outside of the usual soulmate expectations. When Lorenz settled back next to him with his own bowl of food, Claude wouldn't have even wanted to fight it, knowing it wouldn't even feel like hosting.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>At Fae's apartment, they were rolling their eyes from behind Hilda, their arms around her stomach as they criticized, "Your lie was needlessly complicated."</p>
<p>Hilda cocked a shoulder thoughtfully, spinning about to wink at them as she explained her reasoning, "He's delicate."</p>
<p>She knew that if she'd just asked to come over, that Claude would have pushed them away, but suspected that between witnessing some soulmates finding each other, and what Lorenz had asked of him, that it would be better to have a bit of a buffer before being left alone in his company for too long.</p>
<p>Hilda had felt relieved when Fae was happy to accept their friends so closely into their life, even after having been so casually distant for so many years. Their own bonds with the men having grown so easily these past few weeks, it didn't even feel like giving up date nights to spend time with them, which was very different than the almost interview-esque atmosphere that other friends projected around them. On the drive over they discussed how they wanted to cheer them both up, or Claude in the least.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Is Claude crying too much? A friend told me he is crying an appropriate amount, and I figure he mostly cries alone ... He'll be fine.</p>
<p>The title of this chapter is from the song I Wanna Be Yours by Arctic Monkeys after which I retitled this whole fic, and made a Soulmate AU playlist if anyone wants to listen to that either for the sake of this AU or your own ships: <a href="https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3RCFk3izi61WgIYMMblchF?si=9OcvlatmT_6oQGYA6r7GpA">https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3RCFk3izi61WgIYMMblchF?si=9OcvlatmT_6oQGYA6r7GpA</a></p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Fuck Soulmates</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>"Hey!" Hilda greeted when Lorenz opened the door to the apartment.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Hi Hilda," he answered warmly, returning her quick hug as he addressed her partner, "Fae." He accepted something from them from over Hilda's shoulder, which turned out to be a roll of premade peanut butter cookie dough. "Oh?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"We thought it'd be fun," Fae explained with a shrug.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Sure," Lorenz agreed, stepping out of the way as if to allow them entry, but by then Claude had arrived. He stood out from the crowd with his damp hair and pajama pants, but not in a way that any of them would have commented upon, or that was otherwise inappropriate for the hour.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hilda pulled Claude into a tight embrace, so that Lorenz made knowing eye contact with Fae before stepping back to read the instructions on the task he'd been given.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Claude left a kiss on Hilda's cheek as they parted, and reached out to take Fae by the hand to pull them into his arms next. When he moved to kiss their cheek, Fae turned their head as if to speak to Hilda, and Claude caught half of their mouth with his, causing him to yelp in surprise.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Sorry," Claude piped quickly, blushing, eased by the other three laughing at him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Don't worry about it," Fae said pressing on his chest. "Now back up, back up, back up, aaaand let us in."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Claude accepted the direction and walked backwards, his arms still around them as he made way for them and Hilda to find their way inside.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Pushy," he teased, and Fae raised a threatening eyebrow.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Oh, I'll kick your ass," they promised.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Enough flirting," Hilda scolded playfully. "Let's go sit down."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The living room was set up so that in front of the television there was a low table with seats to either side, short, angled things that ate their occupants and made it difficult to stand unless they propped sufficient cushioning behind themselves, and the couch, plush and supportive and plain as it was, behind the table, between these chairs. Claude and Hilda sat on the couch, mostly conversing with themselves, but sometimes throwing a question or a request for solidarity towards the kitchen, where Fae and Lorenz set the cookies to baking.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was starting to snow outside, fat white flakes that had been threatening for days, finally catching the light of the street lamps to float, orange and pink like flower petals, down to the streets below. A lamp was lit in the living room, and Fae and Lorenz shut the lights in the kitchen so that the impending glow of winter made the apartment feel cozy and intimate.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fae sat in the chair closest to the kitchen, leaning over to take Hilda's fingers in hand while Lorenz paced about the room, moving bags and stacks of paper.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Did Dorothea offer you tickets to any shows as compensation?" Fae asked, noticing that they were still on that topic of conversation, trying to help redirect it. "It's been a while since I've been in a theatre."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Claude pursed his lips, obviously unsure how to address Fae's question. He decided to answer directly. "No. But, she hasn't paid yet. So who knows."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I could take you to a show anyway?" Hilda offered, some energy finding her shoulders as she straightened up in excitement, after having slowed herself down to match Claude's mood. "We could all dress up!" She looked from Claude to Lorenz expectantly as she moved her hands to her knees.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Maybe," Claude said, his eyes drifting downwards. His voice was strained. "She might go on vacation."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz and Hilda each gasped as they and Fae came back into reality, where if one could afford it, that was the thing to do when you found your soulmate: take some time away from responsibility to learn about your universe-approved other half. Many high level office jobs even dedicated time for it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Oh yeah," Hilda said finally. "I guess ... that's something people do."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You know," Fae said, bouncing Hilda’s hand, sounding amused, "I could still ask for a few days off?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hilda cracked a laugh. "You're so bad." As she'd laughed however, she felt Claude jolt next to her. "Are you alright, Claude?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Mm?" he answered as if riled from sleep. "Fine. Sorry."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He smiled, but Hilda rolled her eyes, leaning against him on her side. "You can be not fine. That's why we're here."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I thought you were here to celebrate," Claude scoffed, wrapping a lazy arm around her, and she rolled about until she could look up at him, her expression unimpressed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Oh yeah," she insisted sarcastically, rolling her eyes, "we brought 'celebration' cookies."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fae stood then, and ran their hand over Hilda's shoulder as they made their way to the other side of the couch. They moved so that Claude shifted closer to Hilda to allow Fae to sit next to him and found himself embraced from both sides.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>From behind himself, Claude could hear Lorenz chuckle softly as he moved to step around to the front of the couch, in front of Hilda. After placing the remotes on the table, he reached out as if to touch Claude's flush cheek, when the timer for the cookies dinged, and he snapped his hand away instead, moving to inspect them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You know we can all relate, right?" Hilda insisted, moving a hand from Claude's t-shirt to the side of his neck so that he twitched tense and relaxed, sighing and nodding.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Yeah," he said sadly, leaning forward to watch Lorenz in the kitchen. "I can forget sometimes," he looked back to Hilda, "lost in my thoughts." He was smiling again, but more honestly than before, looking from Fae to Hilda as he made to stand. "Here, let me out and I'll make tea — hot chocolate?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The question was asked as he stood, and each Hilda and Fae agreed to one and the other, shifting closer to each other as he strode up behind Lorenz.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I can make tea," he said skeptically, turning around and crossing his arms inquisitively, leaning on the counter, the cookies now on a plate to cool.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Why don't you grab us some blankets?" Claude requested.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Are you cold?" Lorenz asked, aghast, standing straight.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Not in the slightest," Claude assured him, teeth alighting his face, an amused wink further teasing Lorenz, "but you can undress if you're overheated." His voice was softer as he admitted, "I want to cuddle."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"With me?" Lorenz teased, groaning as he tossed his head back in exaggeration. "I'll have to be naked then." He was collecting mugs from the cupboard as Claude turned on the kettle. "You're nothing but a space heater."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I heard the word naked!" Hilda sang from the living room, causing both men to laugh.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Excuse me!" Lorenz called back. "This is a private conversation!"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Just so long as you're not undressing without us," Fae answered, so that Hilda was laughing too.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cheeky,” Lorenz groaned softly, his tone still revealing his amusement. He leaned around Claude to kiss the back of his neck, squeezing at his shoulder, before leaving in search of blankets.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When Lorenz returned, Fae had moved to sit in the chair furthest from the kitchen, where Hilda had found their lap, their drinks and the plate of cookies on the table.  They were enraptured by Claude, who was recounting a childhood memory that he had obviously thought would not be so enticing. He was on the couch, sat up close to the other couple, engrossed in their laughter as Hilda redirected the conversation.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz left two of the folded blankets on the back of the empty chair, and offered one to Hilda, and the other to Claude as he took the space next to him. The smile that Claude gave him filled him with such relief that his heart ached from it, and Lorenz happily bit into a cookie while Fae and Hilda continued the conversation.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Claude too felt warm and comfortable. He watched Fae and Hilda tangled together, the muted soulmarks on their hands swaying as they gestured for emphasis or held onto each other casually, their happiness not soured or empty. He thought of soulmates he knew, and the little smiles they shared when they touched one another, and not just the big bursting moments of when soulmates touched each other for the first time, which he'd witnessed now more than once, but the soft mundane moments, such that he shared with Lorenz, and lately Fae and Hilda too ... and he didn't feel like anyone had a right to say that being soulmates made any more of that connection than love did.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Hilda," Claude said, interrupting their reverie, smiling at her caring confusion. "I love you."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She blanched for a moment, and then blinked a lot, blushing as she declared, "I wouldn't put up with half the shit I do if I didn't love you too, Claude."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A soft hum of laughter echoed in the room, which Claude interrupted again. "Fae." They made eye contact with him, bright and smiling. "I love you."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Although they were a little surprised to be involved, and a tad concerned about returning Claude's sentiment before making a similar declaration to Hilda, they felt it, and so they answered, "I love you too."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They ran their hands across Hilda's stomach, pulling her closer to them and laying a kiss on the side of her neck as if in apology.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Meanwhile Claude was turning his attention to his boyfriend. "Lorenz."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I love you too, dear," he promised, laying his far hand on Claude's leg, but Claude pulled away before he could kiss him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You have to let me say it," he insisted, his smile stressed, but genuine.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Go on then," Lorenz agreed, his expression fond as he nodded.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I love you," Claude said earnestly, sighing. He blinked his eyes closed, and he looked so serious that Lorenz easily saw that this was not an invitation to lean in again, and waited. When Claude opened his eyes again they were glossy, as if his body had thought about crying but he'd repressed the impulse. "I don't want to look for my soulmate anymore," Claude pleaded. Lorenz didn't have the heart to protest, but Claude looked as if he had. He turned to look back and forth from Fae and Hilda and then asserted, "If my soulmate isn't in this room, then they don't matter to me."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz looked more shocked than relieved, more concerned than enamored, as he asked, "You're sure?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Claude laughed, empty, airy. "Do you want a refund?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Claude," Lorenz begged, taking Claude's left hand in both of his, letting his grip trail up over his forearm and soulmark. "Be serious."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I am," Claude vowed. "I promise." He brought his right hand up to adjust Lorenz's hair. "I'm sure."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz hadn’t wanted to release Claude from this promise before because without the search, then the pain he had caused Claude had no value; without results, it had no purpose … but even he had limits. Just as the others had, he had been witnessing how close their little quartet had become, even with no one alighting as soulmates do. This felt important, like his last chance to acknowledge his love for Claude without implying that he agreed with the masses, that soulmates were better; an impossibility at this point. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>With a bit of a broken smile, Lorenz nodded and let Claude pull him forward to rest their foreheads together.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You two are so sweet!" Hilda cooed, and Lorenz's gaze flickered aside to see her melting into Fae's arms, swooning in earnest. Before he could blush too brightly, he closed his eyes and pressed closer to kiss Claude's lips, warm and bitter from his tea.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I'm so proud of you," she insisted.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"For real," Fae agreed, pressing their face into Hilda's neck for a moment, meeting her smile as they repeated the phrase that had become something of a mantra lately.  "Fuck soulmates. Happiness is where it's at."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Claude laughed again, but this time it was full of relief as he spun around, holding firmly to one of Lorenz's hands, pointing at Fae with his right. "Don't advertise that too loudly," he scolded, playful. "Hilda and I will be out of work."</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Between Friends (Claude x Lorenz v Fae x Hilda)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>They made pointless conversation for some time afterwards, shuffling around when they decided to watch a science fantasy movie about reincarnation. The blankets from the empty chair were moved to the floor between Fae's legs, where Hilda could sit as they brushed and braided her hair; the blanket they had been using quickly stuffed into the seat behind Fae for balance. Somehow handing them the blankets had led to Lorenz sitting closer to the other couple, and Claude on the far side of the couch, leaning against his boyfriend’s left side.</p><p>The movie was insufficiently distracting to keep Claude from reveling in his relationship. He was relieved that Lorenz had agreed to let him give up his fruitless search. With the lights doused for the movie, it was too tempting to kiss him, at least.</p><p>Lorenz squirmed for a second, and then he sat stark still, elbowing Claude as his lips found his neck.</p><p><em> 'We have guests,' </em> Lorenz thought about hissing, but instead he adjusted the blanket on their laps, over where Claude had bent his legs up under himself when he'd leaned closer. He waited until the scene in the movie changed, from a quiet and white palate, to action and neon colors, and turned to look at Claude.</p><p>"Don't," he whispered, smiling at Claude's pout as he slid his left hand below the blanket and over the inside of Claude's thigh.</p><p><em> 'This is so much worse than a few kisses,' </em> Claude thought as he sighed into Lorenz's shoulder, a guilty smile on his lips, adjusting his position.</p><p>Lorenz bit his tongue to keep from laughing, finding Claude's hardening cock and squeezing him solidly five times. He realized he was sitting too stiff and leaned back into the couch to try to appear more casual. Glancing at Fae and Hilda, who seemed invested in the movie, Lorenz smiled as he looked back at Claude's flush expression, soft and desperate. <em> 'And so tempting.' </em></p><p>Caught in Claude's green eyes, Lorenz did miss that one of Claude's hands was also no longer visible over the blanket, but he did feel when that missing, deft hand found the button on his pants, and his eyes flashed wide in warning. Claude too glanced over at their guests and at then the movie and the time on the sound system, calculating in such an obvious way that Lorenz frowned and looked away to the flashing images on the television.</p><p>Lorenz released Claude then, his left arm loose at his side as he leaned forward away from the couch and reached out to take a cookie from the table in his right hand, settling back in a deliberate slouch so that his waist was positioned in a much more accessible way for Claude to quickly flop the blanket back around him and make swift work his zipper.</p><p>They shared another fleeting moment of eye contact as Lorenz took a bite of his cookie before they went back to staring blankly ahead and pawing at each other. Lorenz was swallowing the last of his dessert when he moved again, bending his left leg up under himself as he leaned into the arm of the couch. He smiled as Claude followed him. The blanket pulled taught over his hip, Lorenz risked pulling Claude's cock from his pajamas, hidden by their covers, and felt Claude shiver all over.</p><p>The heat had been turned on in their apartment, beyond their control, and sweat and precum made a smooth glide of Lorenz's fingers, but it was he who gasped, rather than Claude, as he felt himself suddenly, similarly exposed beneath the blanket. He looked again to Fae and Hilda, but his vision was a little unfocused as Claude ran his thumb and middle finger just below the head of his cock, and he decided to simply look away with speed, towards the screen, sighing once more as he tried to pass off his eyes fluttering closed for a long, tired blink.</p><p>"Do you two think you're subtle?" Fae asked suddenly, and while Claude had the wherewithal simply to stop moving his hand, Lorenz snapped his hand away in a very obvious way, blushing now from embarrassment.</p><p>"What is—?" Hilda was asking, as Claude was sitting up, swinging his legs to the floor, too fast for the blanket to handle. Lorenz reached out and clasped at the fabric in a panic, shooting Claude an incredulous look as Hilda immediately made sense of Fae's warning. After a giggle, with her hand over her mouth, Hilda cautioned, "Oh! Be careful how you kick that blanket, love."</p><p>"You know if you wanted us involved in your sex lives, all you had to do was ask?" Fae teased, also chuckling.</p><p>Claude had a hand to his forehead, hiding himself from his guests and Lorenz, shaking his head a little, though perhaps not in answer. With his other hand he held the blanket in a fist on his lap.</p><p>Lorenz let himself huff a laugh also, relieved that no one was screaming in disgust or horror or rage, and then he groaned, "Saints above." He looked Fae in the eye, "I <em> would </em> march off to get a glass of water — and yet."</p><p>"And yet," they agreed, their smile mischievous.</p><p>Hilda was animate, distressed, but playfully so. She held her hands up, palms to the ceiling. "If you'd finished, what the hell was your plan on getting out of there?"</p><p>"Oh, I'd sleep here," Claude piped, returned to himself as he leaned forward to address Hilda. "Make it Lorenz's problem."</p><p>"Thanks, dear," Lorenz answered, shocked by how red Claude was when he looked again. He could only hope he was not half so flush, but doubted that was any kind of possibility based on the warmth in his face and chest.</p><p>The television made a loud noise and Hilda moved to grab a remote to pause the movie, and that really felt like an exposure to the two men, shifting awkwardly in silence, beneath the now obviously supremely insufficient cover of the blanket.</p><p>"Do you need us to turn away as you make your way to the bedroom?" Fae giggled.</p><p>Hilda squawked — a sharp bark of laughter, and stared down her friends as she promised in a sensuous tone, "I won't be turning."</p><p>"We're done," Claude insisted, raising an open hand to them, leaning his head forward to rest against his thumb, smiling in spite of himself. "We're fine."</p><p>"Should we be leaving anyway?" Fae offered more kindly.</p><p>Hilda stood, and Lorenz had to swallow when faced with the reality of how close she'd been just now — with how close she still was. "I mean," she sighed, holding out her hands and shaking her head in disbelief, half finished french braids untangling over her shoulders, "I suppose we're not wanted."</p><p>"Don't be that way," Claude whined, tilting his head in a playful pout.</p><p>"Don't," Hilda said before pausing, filling the air with confused laughter that infected the four of them, "do sex without asking."</p><p>"You're right," Claude conceded, his eyes wide and his mouth clamped shut as he looked away and back. "You're right. Very fair."</p><p>Fae was standing, holding Hilda from behind, even as she leaned away to meet them in interested eye contact.</p><p>Hilda turned to the men again. "Is that still a guest room?" she asked, tossing her head back in the direction of the hallway.</p><p>It was mostly an office, as there was no dresser, but there was still a double bed.</p><p>"More or less," Claude answered, squinting skeptically.</p><p>"We could play a game," Hilda suggested.</p><p>Claude tilted his head in the opposite direction as previously and looked to Lorenz, who had raised an eyebrow. Lorenz sighed and looked back to Hilda. "We're listening."</p><p>"Most orgasms?" Hilda prompted, but as soon as the final syllable was out of her lips all three of her companions were protesting loudly.</p><p>"No!"</p><p>She was doubled over laughing, hands clasped one over the other under her chin, when Fae proposed, "Prettiest voice?"</p><p>If Lorenz had been doubtful of how red he was before, he was certain now that he might well be unrecognizable, and he moved his hand from his mouth to his chin, exposing a cynical smile. He took another deep breath and asked, "How would we judge?"</p><p>"Lorenz," Hilda wheezed, whether in disbelief or as a manner of scolding was lost to her amusement.</p><p>"Claude," Fae implored, and that they too were trying not to laugh was obvious, "convince Lorenz not to worry about rules."</p><p>They punctuated this sentence by wrapping a hand around Hilda's neck, still bent over at an angle giggling, and leaning down to breathe and bite upon her ear.</p><p>"Yeah, uh," Claude said, suddenly distracted, and still surprised by the progression of his day. He tangled his right hand with Lorenz's left. "I don't think the game's the thing, here."</p><p>When Hilda straightened, she blew Claude and Lorenz an exaggerated kiss and pulled Fae by the hand down the hallway in Claude and Lorenz's two bedroom apartment to, a sufficient room, and a mockery of privacy.</p><p>"Is this really happening?" Claude asked Lorenz, his eyes a little wild, and down the hall Hilda's voice echoed from beyond the door in a wanton moan. Certainly exaggerated, but also clearly an invitation.</p><p>Lorenz looked back to Claude, his mouth agape until he licked and closed his lips, speaking over the next cry of pleasure, another taunt, this time from Fae and Hilda both. "This is your fault."</p><p>Claude laughed, as if affronted. "I was just going to kiss your neck. You're always fucking escalating—"</p><p>Lorenz cut him off with a kiss, fumbling with the fastenings on his pants as he made ready to stand, regardless of Claude's reaction. He didn't dare open his eyes as he asked, up close to Claude's mouth, "Are we playing?"</p><p>Claude sighed, smiling, shaking his head a little at the absurdity of the situation as Hilda's voice called out again and there was an audible bump against the door to the spare room.</p><p>"Fuck yes."</p><p>As they passed the guest room, Claude hit the outside of the door with an open hand, an action which was quickly repeated by a person on the other side. He shot Lorenz an amused smile, which he answered even as he rolled his eyes, and pulled Claude into their bedroom, closing the door.</p><p>They kissed, urgent and excited, and Claude made to shove Lorenz against the wall, but Lorenz pulled him close and rolled with him, nudging the laundry hamper aside with his foot until there was space a little farther from the door where he could press Claude against the boundary instead. His mouth found Claude's neck, so that Claude’s was free to call out in answer to Hilda, his hand flat against the wall, slapping it twice.</p><p>On the other side, Fae made a fist and pounded back an equal number of times, laughing with Hilda.</p><p>"Well this is something," Fae said, surprised, and pleased, and praising Hilda, who bit her tongue at them and wiggled her shoulders.</p><p>They slid their hands out over her collarbone, down her arms to her fingertips, twiddling their hands together, kissing her all the while. Hilda had the air pulled from her when Fae gasped into her mouth when Claude moaned on the other side of the wall again, so very close now, and she smiled, all teeth and starlight.</p><p>Fae released Hilda's hands then, sliding their right up the front of her shirt, caressing her soft stomach, dipping the tip of their thumb in her bellybutton as their left hand directed Hilda's chin aside to expose her neck and cleavage, sucking and licking to irritate her delicate skin before running their teeth along patches of particularly pink flesh.</p><p>Hilda was purring, quiet at first, and then louder, making a show of it as Fae cupped one of her breasts up so that they could dip their tongue down below the layer of her clothing.</p><p>Nearby, Lorenz was rolling Claude's shirt up into his armpits, massaging at his chest with his thumbs, biting and licking at the shell of Claude's ear as he raised his arms in surrender, and tapped twice more at the wall.</p><p>Pivoting away from Hilda, Fae knocked back at the wall with a smug expression, as their girlfriend pulled herself out of her shirt. Quickly, they pivot back, groping Hilda through her bra, kissing her lips and then the hollow of her collarbone.</p><p>"Oh, honey..." Hilda whined happily, as even this, even weeks into repetition and affection, was welcome.</p><p>Fae's hands slipped along the base of Hilda's bra, following the material to her back, caressing up over her shoulder blades and cradling her close as they kissed her deeply. They shared a giggle, Hilda's bottom lip between Fae's teeth, the straps of her bra softly draped over her shoulders by their gentle fingernails, as Claude yelped opposite them.</p><p>Both of his nipples were being pinched firm as he'd been pulling his own shirt overhead. Claude sighed out pleased little curses as Lorenz scratched and massaged at his thick chest, though only with his left hand, his right still clasping at Claude's left nipple, unyielding, sending shivers and jolts of pleasure across Claude’s exposed body. After Lorenz gave his lover another fast, wet kiss, nuzzling his nose against Claude's in parting, he bent his knees and squatted as much as it was necessary to suck Claude's left nipple into his doting mouth.</p><p>Fae was surprised at the swift progress Hilda had made of unclasping the buttons on their shirt, bottom up, when her hands found their collar, pulling their face back down to her chest as she rolled her body up to meet them, and their shirt back over their shoulders.</p><p>Leaning her shoulders back against the wall, Hilda taunted, "All my moans better not be exaggerated."</p><p>Fae opened their warm mouth to lave at her skin again as their hands found the clasp on Hilda’s bra.</p><p>An amused huff of air left their open mouth as they moved to suck on several little spots down the inside of Hilda's chest before pausing just over her nipple to jokingly criticize, "Show-off."</p><p>Hilda adjusted her position to rock her pelvis down against Fae's thigh, whining as they sucked on her sensitive skin.</p><p>Claude shivered, Hilda's voice in his ears as his back arched forward, Lorenz's fingers sliding back and forth over the head of his cock with welcome friction. Lorenz had only meant to free Claude's erection, but the loose fit of Claude's pants had meant that they'd simply slipped to the floor, leaving Claude bare and desperate for contact.</p><p>His hair curled and frizzy after his shower, Claude's mane was an easy anchor for Lorenz's other hand. He tugged on the locks to pull Claude's head back, exposing his neck to bites and kisses that left him answering Hilda.</p><p>Fae had dragged two of their fingers back and forth over their tongue suggestively while grasping the side of Hilda's breast a moment past, so their fingers were slick even before finding the damp state of their girlfriend’s panties as they slipped their hand under the band of the material. Their test results having come back negative a week past, the pair of them were long past previous precautions between each other, and there was no surprise or worry as they slid their fingers back and forth.</p><p>Leaning in to bite Hilda's lips before nuzzling back into her throat, Fae fondled Hilda beneath her clothing, panting hot and heavy on her skin as she groaned in approval.</p><p>Claude's fists clenched on the front of Lorenz's shirt as he bit and sucked particularly forcefully along the side of his throat. When he pulled his mouth away, Lorenz was flush, moving only slowly, dizzied by arousal and the chaos, but still present enough to run his thumb down over a drop of precum on the head of Claude's dick.</p><p>"You're wearing too many clothes," Claude growled, manhandling Lorenz until he could get him back against the wall with another thud.</p><p>When Lorenz opened his mouth to reply, he was instead shocked to silence as Claude dropped to a crouch in front of him, clumsy hands caught between Claude's desire to grope at his crotch and fight with the fastenings on his pants.</p><p>Her hands wrapped around her attentive partner, Hilda started sliding Fae's shirt up their back until they scrambled away from Hilda, curling themselves into the motion so that she could continue pulling the fabric off of them. They quickly reached behind themselves to pop the clasp on their bra as they stood, letting the garment slip off themselves as they leaned forward to kiss their pretty, pink partner. Hilda rolled a hand up under their left breast, letting her grasp slip across the smooth, sleek skin until she could catch a nipple in the curve of her thumb.</p><p>Fae did their best to move in a way that might accommodate Hilda's wandering hands, but this only lasted so long, as they wrapped their arms around her, pulling her close, cradling and massaging her shoulders. Hilda was undeterred, wiggling her fingers as her hand was caught somewhere between the soft press of their bodies. She giggled and gasped, tossing her head back, so that she could catch her breath as Fae purred and laughed, and dragged open mouth kisses from her neck to her shoulder and then down across her collarbone and her upper chest. Hilda's free hand traced the line of their spine with her middle finger, until she found the band of their pants and let her palm skip around to the side of their ass.</p><p>It felt like a punishment to have to untangle themselves from Hilda's embrace, but then Fae was working at the fastenings on their own pants, and found that Hilda too was stepping out of her lower layers and hummed appreciatively. They bit their bottom lip at her as they nearly tripped over their clothing making their way back to her.</p><p>Fae lapped once at the tips of three of their fingers again before rubbing small firm circles just above Hilda's clit, as they leaned in to kiss her more, unbothered by muffling a few of her moans as their hand slipped lower, the pad of their middle finger finding her entrance. With a hiccuped sigh, Hilda shifted her legs, whining encouragingly as she rocked her body down and forward into the affection.</p><p>They kissed her cheek as they moved their hand, back and forth between her lips, dipping up towards her entrance but pulling away just shy of penetrating their girlfriend so that she panted and shivered. With eyes lidded heavy with lust, Fae slowly sunk down to their knees, licking and sucking at Hilda’s breasts as they ground the heel of their palm up against her clit.</p><p>The pair of them froze a moment when a thud crashed against their shared wall, but when it became obvious that it wasn’t an objection to their activities, they resumed them; Hilda looking desperate and lustful, Fae looking joyous and passionate.</p><p>Continuing their descent, Fae slid their hands up over her mound and stomach to grab Hilda’s hips until they were rested to where they could lean forward to lap long and reverent against her sex.</p><p>With another graceful moan, Hilda tangled one hand in Fae's hair and bent her other arm to jut her elbow back against the wall three times.</p><p>Once Lorenz was free of his clothes, Claude was running his tongue up across his balls and the base of his erection in a few eager motions of blind arousal, pulling away far enough to suck on the head of his cock until Lorenz's snuffling escalated into helpless little whimpers. His arm extended down at his side, Lorenz pounded back against the wall in answer to the latest cacophony from their guests.</p><p>Catching his breath, Claude pulled off to work him over with both hands as he spoke, "Lorenz."</p><p>"Mm?" He turned his head down and to his shoulder, eyes closed because the sight of Claude, naked, squatting before him, might just be too much under the circumstances.</p><p>"We have guests," Claude teased, even as Hilda's muffled pleasure rang through the wall. Leaning forward, Claude crowded himself around Lorenz, resting himself on his forearms and the side of his fists, up against the wall, so that his positioning had Lorenz's cock sliding across his cheek, bouncing once as he twitched.</p><p>"What?" Lorenz huffed, squinting as his body pinched back away from the stimulation, and then he had to open his eyes to see Claude squishing the side of the head of his cock against the itch of his shortest facial hair. Claude’s smile grew wicked as their eyes met, licking and biting his bottom lip, full of lust, dragging his thumb through a drop of precum at the tip of Lorenz's cock down across the base of him, and then through the beard along the edge of his chin, popping the digit in his mouth. He looked rightfully smug as Lorenz’s stomach flexed, as he stayed his reaction.</p><p>He reached his hand back around Lorenz's cock as he clarified, "Don't hold back."</p><p>With that, he was using a finger and his mouth to guide Lorenz back between his lips, returning his arm to the wall so that he could balance himself as he bobbed back and forth, humming appreciatively as Lorenz keened, broken and ravished, and loud enough for their friends to hear.</p><p>Hilda’s chorale had started to include a chant of affirmations, mostly use of the word yes, as Fae sucked and rubbed and licked and kissed at her ever grateful cunt. They shifted closer until they were almost beneath Hilda, craning their neck back to ensure the whole of their mouth had access to their lover’s most sensitive places. Their hands rest on her stomach, thumbs sliding back and forth atop her mound. They paused for half a heartbeat, Fae pulling far enough away to make more direct, animate eye contact with Hilda as Lorenz's pleasured cry echoed through the wall, and gleefully returned to their revelry. </p><p>As Lorenz luxuriated in the practiced glide of Claude’s sweet suction, he steeled himself to look down at his boyfriend, busy and voracious as he was. He ran one hand back through Claude's hair, raking his fingers through his curls so that he was dragged back naturally, before closing his grip on the tangles and tugging until Claude was looking up at him, his tongue still caressing back and forth under the base of his cock as his open lips stretched into a wide smile.</p><p>Leaving another kiss on the tip of Lorenz's dick, Claude pulled back further to ask, "You want to fuck my mouth?"</p><p>Lorenz scoffed, a strangled noise. He pulled Claude closer again, resting his opposite hand on his head too, stroking his thumb over his forehead in soft assurance even as Claude's eyes fluttered closed and Lorenz found no resistance to the wet haven of his mouth. As he shifted back and forth in three shallow thrusts he answered quietly, "I could do that."</p><p>Then he was pulling Claude away again, and Claude moved his left hand back from the wall to Lorenz's hip, and then his cock.</p><p>The transcendent trilling of the tip of Claude's tongue on the head of his dick kept Lorenz from finishing his inquiry, but at least he could respond similarly to the change in key of Hilda's moaning. He felt his face fall in desperation when he found his words again. "Do you want that?"</p><p>Claude moaned as he shifted forward on the front of his feet, nodding as he looked up to Lorenz again, his parted lips bouncing against his boyfriend's cock. </p><p>Closing his eyes, Claude set himself up more securely, a hand on the wall and one on Lorenz's hip as they worked through the motions. When Lorenz moved slowly, Claude would swallow around him, and when he would thrust, sharp and earnest, Claude would, upon occasion, tap at Lorenz's hip, pulling off to breathe and swallow. Rarely, they could only work through as many as three thrusts, and often, as many as eight, though soon Lorenz lost count as Claude weathered the strain. The perverse gagging noises following their fucking felt louder to Lorenz than even his moaning — though he suspected this was impossible, and that he was simply tuned into it. Shivers travelled up his spine as his body begged for release, but then Claude was tapping at him again, so that was left letting him go, trying to find his coherency as Claude cursed.</p><p>"Fuck," Claude panted, tossing his head back, licking his lips and swallowing saliva and precum. "Fuck. Fuck it. Fuck me." He scratched at the front of his hairline, composing himself a little. A laugh bubbled out of him and he dragged his fingertips down the sides of his face as he sought eye contact with his boyfriend. "You think you can fuck me?"</p><p>"<em>Fuck you</em>, fuck you?" Lorenz asked, half a skeptic smile cracking over his face. </p><p>Claude laughed again, and then bit his bottom lip as he reached down between his legs to stroke himself as he whined, "I haven't earned it?"</p><p>Lorenz adjusted his posture as he grabbed the base of himself. "It's just ... I'm not sure how long our guests will be at it," he explained, trying to justify why he wouldn't jump at the opportunity. "Will you be uncomfortable if we take too long?"</p><p>"Fuck Lorenz," Claude said, his voice full of amusement as he leaned back and then sprang to his feet. "This is <b>our</b> apartment," he growled, pressing himself up and around Lorenz. "They can leave if we take too long."</p><p>“I can’t see that happening,” Lorenz chuckled, his hands finding Claude’s ass.</p><p>“Me neither.”</p><p> </p><p>Where Hilda's cries had become deep and guttural previously, she was high pitched, breathy and staccato now. Fae slowed their hand, but still pressed deep and firm as they continued to rock the two fingers they had inside their girlfriend encouragingly. They kneaded what of her clit and lips they could between their lips as they pursued Hilda's pleasure even through her orgasm.</p><p>They lapped at her gently a few more times when they finally let their hand fall to her inner thigh, kissing from her pussy to her thigh, to her hip, their eyes half-lidded in an amorous gaze as they asked, "How are the boys doing?"</p><p>Hilda listened for a moment, long enough to hear Claude groaning aborted little words of praise, and let her expression pinch in lust before smiling earnestly at her lover. Fae chuckled and fell back to sit on their clothes on the floor.</p><p>“Oh, they’re doing just fine,” Hilda answered, biting her tongue at them. She slapped against the wall three times as she left it, slowly crawling over them, laughing with Fae as an answer of three bangs came back from the other side of the wall.</p><p>Tangled in Hilda’s arms, grinding down against her thigh, as Hilda humped against them with each long deep breath she took over their ear, Fae shivered pleasurably and trailed gentle, suckling kisses along the side of their girlfriend’s neck.</p><p>Hilda made a soft comfortable noise and asked, “Do you want to lay on the bed?”</p><p>Fae giggled. “That seems rude, somehow.”</p><p>Hilda pulled away to raise an eyebrow at Fae’s wide eyes, shaking her head as her hands dripped down their body, pinching sensitive little spots as they went.</p><p>“<em><b>Oh</b>, fuck! </em>” Claude’s voice pierced the wall.</p><p>“They’d let me fuck you in <em> their </em> bed,” Hilda said with confidence. Fae smiled and shook their head, and so Hilda nodded and leaned back to kiss them again, adjusting her position over them, slipping her right hand down to pet upwards at their wet lips, and prod at penetrating them as her body lay flush on their right side.</p><p>“Oh, that’s good,” Lorenz praised, as Claude sobbed in pleasure, bent over and curled up as he held onto the unaccommodating surface of the wall, his hands flat against the surface as he rolled his forehead against it.</p><p>“You are good, yes? Claude?” Lorenz confirmed in a level tone, obviously expecting an affirmative. He was kneeled behind Claude, his right arm wrapped around his upper thigh, squeezing his cock down towards the floor, while his left hand slowed where he was fingering Claude, awaiting his answer.</p><p>“Yes,” Claude whined, biting his lips into his mouth as the hand around his cock was suddenly, obviously, wet with precum, “fuck.”</p><p>“Good,” Lorenz repeated, squeezing firm at Claude’s cock and thigh to press the pair of them closer together as his teeth and tongue found the defined divots at the base of Claude’s ass.</p><p>Claude was loud and animate except for when they parted twice, for Lorenz to slather him in more lube.</p><p>Hilda was sitting up now, still straddling Fae’s right thigh, swiveling her hips as she ground down against her urgently, letting her right knee bump against the base of her hand as she fingered her fiercely. Fae’s knees were bent slightly, their heels on the floor shifting their weight on the clothes their rest on to shift themselves enough to grind back against Hilda, their left hand stroking grabbing at their own breasts while their right grabbed encouragingly at the swell of Hilda’s fat hip.</p><p>“Oh, Hilda … I’m cumming,” Fae whimpered, moaning an empty syllable as the lust stoked by Claude’s open passion titillated beyond the familiarity of Hilda’s libido.</p><p>“Fuck,” Hilda gasped, doing her best to keep pace or even speed up if her wrist would allow it. She raised herself on her knees as she begged, “Put your hand under me.”</p><p>It was a little discoordinated, but when Fae rest their hand so Hilda could grind her pussy against the pads of their fingers while pursuing the results of the delightful oscillation of her own fingers, it was well worth it.</p><p>Claude was certainly relaxed enough now for cock, but it had been a while since Lorenz had been able appreciate his boyfriend from this particular angle, and so Lorenz moved to grab hold of Claude’s hips to force him to squat lower, if only to put him a little off balance, as he licked smooth and languid at his twitching hole.</p><p>Claude’s wanton bliss kept him flustered and vocal as he leaned his head away from the wall to try and twist in a way that he might be able to look over his shoulder at Lorenz, but his neck protested, and he knocked his temple back against the wall as he simply gave in, bouncing himself back to grind himself against Lorenz’s open mouth. An especially licentious moan tripped up out of Claude’s lips as Lorenz hummed pleased against him.</p><p>Fae and Hilda were cuddling on the floor, caressing one another in a state of slow relaxation as Claude’s wails of pleasure cut short. There might have been the expectation that the men had finished for the night before the truth of Claude and Lorenz’s inadequate walls was revealed, and the soft sounds of their lovemaking found the guestroom. The atmosphere of sated repose that Fae and Hilda had been falling into was immediately dispelled, as their eyes widened in knowing surprise.</p><p>Pulling themselves to their feet, they stepped back up to the wall, and wrapping themselves around Hilda from behind, Fae pounded against it three times, and nearly giggled with Hilda when Claude whined and knocked back; once, a pause, and then two more times in answer.</p><p>Lorenz was squishing Claude forwards, until he was more or less standing upright, carefully driving his cock up into his lover as he leaned back to accommodate their height difference, and yet Claude still felt wholly and pleasurably impaled, and hardly needed the encouragement of an audience to express as much.</p><p>After sharing a smile about Claude’s discomposure, Fae leaned in to kiss Hilda’s neck as she raised her hands up and back, wrapping her right hand around the back of Fae’s head and holding the opposite side of her own neck. Fae’s hands slipped from the wall down over Hilda’s exposed body, holding her to them even as they leaned forward, squishing her against the wall as they thrust their hips against her behind so that Hilda laughed as she moved her left hand to the wall, slapping it once as she pressed against the surface.</p><p>Fae’s right hand caressed over the curves of Hilda’s stomach so that they could gently pinch and pluck at Hilda’s clit between their middle and ring fingers before sliding lower, gliding their digits once more between her lips, letting the crook at the base of these same fingers continue to tease at her with less coordination. Hilda moaned and bounced herself back against Fae’s pelvis encouragingly.</p><p>Lorenz leaned forward, wrapping his hands around Claude’s stomach as he sped to fuck him faster as Claude pressed back against the wall, unable to knock back to the sound on the opposite side as he held onto whatever would give him support into the waves of sublime pleasure threatening to finally undo him.</p><p>“Claude,” Lorenz purred, from behind his ear, slowing his hips into little rolling thrusts, as a cry of pleasure from Hilda sounded through the room.</p><p>“Mm?” Claude answered, bouncing himself a little encouragingly.</p><p>“What am I going to do with you?” Lorenz teased, snapping his hips once, sharply, so that Claude moaned in time with Hilda’s next gasped-yelped affirmation.</p><p>“I can’t take you anywhere. I can barely take you home,” Lorenz continued, groaning as he grinded himself forward after two more strong thrusts. “Seducing our friends?”</p><p>“I— They—” Claude babbled, and then Lorenz’s left arm wrapped around Claude’s neck, his hand on his right shoulder as he held Claude close, and with just enough pressure on his windpipe to reduce his air supply and dizzy him in a way that brought a strained smile to his tired mouth.</p><p>Another two bangs came from Fae and Hilda, and Lorenz released Claude’s stomach with his right hand to knock back against the wall. He left his hand there, resting his weight upon it, as he fucked Claude faster again, and steeled himself to continue speaking over Claude and Hilda’s moaning; both now lovers past and present and driving him absolutely insane.</p><p>“They love to hear your pretty noises,” Lorenz said, moving the hand from Claude’s shoulder to his chin. His whole body shivered as he taunted, “Do you even realize? There’s less than four inches between you and Hilda. If the wall were to just ... disappear, you’d be moaning into her mouth.”</p><p>Claude started rocking himself on the balls of his feet as he sobbed in a way that exposed his sexual interest.</p><p>“You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” He let his hand slip from Claude’s chin to his neck, attentive and careful about the pressure he applied.</p><p>“I—” Claude gasped, as much as he could, swallowing in a way that made him aware of every nerve in his body, “<em>yes. </em>”</p><p>“I bet they’d let you cum all over them.”</p><p>“I would — <em> ah-ah</em>, <b>fuck.</b>”</p><p>“I know, darling,” Lorenz whined, nuzzling into the side of his head, also enraptured by their torture and their pleasure. “Oh, I know.”</p><p>Claude sighed in surprise as Lorenz left him, the pressure on his neck giving way to a gulp of air, while the absence of his hips and cock left him feeling exposed and unexpectedly empty, but Lorenz was swift about touching him again. Sliding his hands up the backs of Claude’s thighs, massaging and spreading his ass, he licked again at Claude’s hole, now especially sensitive and fucked open.</p><p>Claude was pretty sure the noise he made was about eight octaves deeper than anything he could make intentionally, and he reached down off the wall to slide a hand down the front of his left thigh to stabilize himself, because he felt like he could easily fall over, or melt, or cum so hard he might pull something.</p><p>Lorenz didn’t lick him long, just enough to indulge before he was standing again, kissing the backs of Claude’s shoulders as he helped position him with hands on his hips and trailing up over his arms on the wall. He was awash in love and lust and admiration as he positioned himself to fuck Claude through the crest of their lovemaking.</p><p>Claude came all over himself and Lorenz’s hand, and Lorenz found his peak deep in his lover’s body, glad Claude had possessed the foresight to ask for a condom as he disentangled from his boyfriend.</p><p>After standing and stretching against the wall, Claude had turned to find the rooms silent, and laughed once. Lorenz was already flopped back against the bed, condom disposed of, his hands curled up on his stomach. After wiping himself down with a t-shirt, Claude joined him, and they listened to their guests shuffle around the quiet of the apartment, washing themselves, stealing their mouthwash. It was comfortable, and ridiculous, and Claude could tell neither he nor Lorenz were ready to face whatever might come next, as they waited to hear if their guests would sneak away into the night or simply back into the guest room.</p><p>Claude encouraged Lorenz to wash up first, as he might need another shower, coated in cum and lube as he had been, and it was late when Claude tiptoed back to bed, the door to the guest room conspicuously closed. He found Lorenz awake, rolling his eyes fondly at his phone, which he shared with Claude.</p><p><b>Fae (2:27 AM):</b> Hilda and I agree that Claude won prettiest voice, but that you should get a special mention as like … director</p><p><b>Lorenz (2:35 AM):</b> Claude says he votes for Hilda, and I’m abstaining, so you’re right, Claude wins.</p><p><b>Lorenz: (2:40 AM):</b> He’s blushing very badly</p><p><b>Fae (2:40 AM):</b> <em>:kiss wink emoji: :kiss wink emoji: :kiss wink emoji:</em></p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I hope this chapter wasn't too repetitive. We are 5,520/7,314 words into the outline. I'm really enjoying this AU.</p><p>I moved all my fic's from the Original Character tags to the My Unit | Byleth tag, because Fae is a My Unit original character ... and while I've read and enjoyed fics featuring OCs in the My Unit | Robin | Reflet tag before, I've only seen Byleth in the FE3H My Unit tag and so I'm bracing myself for a few disappointed readers ...</p><p>Would love a kudos or comment from people who are here intentionally. (;</p><p>I'm sorry if Lorenz's lack of self restraint at the start of this chapter upset anyone. Do not touch or expose yourself or your partners in front of people without their consent irl. This is still a smut fic.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Aftermath</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Lorenz was certain as he roused that he had woken a few times before, though he had no memory of those moments. He was wide awake now, and shifted to look down to where Claude had rolled and slid and shifted to the base of the bed, half hanging off the side as if he’d suffered a tumultuous sleep and was slowly blinking back towards him. Rubbing his face and his eyes with his left hand, he extended his right hand down into Claude's hair with a sigh.</p><p>
  <em> 'You tried so hard to push him away, and yet still now are promised mornings with him... He's as relieved as you are...' </em>
</p><p>With intent to sit up, Lorenz raised his shoulders from the mattress until his body protested, and he groaned as he flopped back against the sheets, bringing both of his hands in to hold his chest and stomach. Claude giggled.</p><p>"My fucking abs," Lorenz whined, smiling, obviously pleased with himself. He rolled so that he could put his weight on his wrist, and curl closer to Claude on his side instead, feeling his legs strain from this also. "And my knees ... If only you were ... maybe three inches taller."</p><p>The two men shifted closer together, Claude extending his arms to Lorenz as he shook his head as if in answer. Lorenz leaned in to kiss Claude's lips once, moving his left hand to hold Claude's upper arm as he found himself enclosed in his embrace. "How are your legs?"</p><p>Claude swallowed before answering, but even then, his voice came out hoarse enough to notice. "I don't know yet." He smiled as Lorenz laughed in horror, taking his hand away from Claude's arm to wrap it over his own mouth.</p><p>Curling his arm up under Claude's shoulder, Lorenz pulled himself closer and left soft, suckling, apologetic kisses along his throat. Claude closed his eyes as he extended his chin towards the head of the bed and asked, as much as he could taunt, "Want me to stand up and find out?"</p><p>Lorenz nuzzled into Claude’s neck and across the line of his jaw, against the bristle of his beard. He pulled away only to pout at Claude, “No, you just relax. Let me get you some water.”</p><p> </p><p>Fae’s phone vibrated on the desk by the table in time with Lorenz’s steps in the hallway, which roused the two lovers in the guestroom. Hilda grumbled in disapproval, rolling about until she could spoon Fae from behind and pout into their shoulder. “Are people already getting up?”</p><p>“Not me,” Fae promised her, rubbing the back of her hand. “I’m not going anywhere.”</p><p>“Good.” Hilda punctuated her sentence with a kiss on the back of their neck.</p><p>Silence filled the room for a while, and despite not moving to look at one another, both occupants felt the spell of sleep was soundly broken by their earlier conversation.</p><p>“Hilda?” Fae whispered.</p><p>“Mm?”</p><p>“...How are you feeling?” They tangled their fingers with hers, seeking assurance that they hadn’t ruined their girlfriend’s friendships or spoiled her pride.</p><p>Hilda hummed out a long, comfortable noise as she pressed her forehead against them until her chin hooked over their shoulder, and Fae relaxed even before Hilda could answer properly.</p><p>“Like I need a real shower.”</p><p>Fae curled their right hand back to hold the side of Hilda’s face and neck as they pressed, “And how do you think they’re feeling?”</p><p>Hilda tilted her head to press her mouth into Fae’s palm, not leaving a kiss, just, enjoying the pressure of it. When she moved her face away, she sighed. “I hope they feel happy.”</p><p>Fae huffed once as they set themselves to rolling around in Hilda’s arms to where they could face her. They smiled, mischievous and confident as they declared, “I’m sure they do.”</p><p>Shifting forward, Hilda tangled a leg around Fae’s also, pulling them in for a long, desperate kiss. She was blushing, heart pounding, blood rushing her ears.</p><p>“I love you.”</p><p>Fae’s eyes blew wide and they gasped as if in disbelief. “I love you too.” They leaned in to press their forehead to Hilda’s, confusing their girlfriend, who had been expecting a kiss. “I love you so much Hilda.” They pulled away again to look her in the eye and Hilda could see that Fae’s eyes were glassy, as if with suppressed tears. She tilted her head in confusion. Fae insisted, “You know you don’t have to say it just because Claude did?”</p><p>Hilda laughed, she laughed and she rolled away, and she laughed some more, hiding her eyes with her left hand. It was infectious. Fae laughed too.</p><p>“Oh, Goddess,” Hilda groaned, from her back, clearly amused, “I forgot he did that.” She sat up to her side, shaking her head, running a hand through her long pink hair. “No. Fuck soulmates.”</p><p>“Fuck soulmates,” Fae repeated, happy and relieved, stretching up for another kiss.</p><p> </p><p>Somehow Hilda and Lorenz missed each other in their little hallway, and a few minutes later she was using the shower as he was making his way back to the kitchen to assess what they had to offer in regards to food. As Lorenz was passing the front door, there was a knock upon it, and he looked over his shoulder in distress, looking to make eye contact with Claude, who was stepping out of their bedroom, but caught Fae’s attention also, who was leaving the guest room. With a sigh, Lorenz rolled his eyes and adjusted his collar and his hair before looking out the peephole. He stood a little straighter as he made ready to address their downstairs neighbour.</p><p>“Good morning, Manuela.”</p><p>“Good morning,” she said brightly, “I’m so glad you’re in.”</p><p>She stepped one foot forward and was trying to peer inside, and so Lorenz tightened his grip on the handle and adjusted himself to hide the interior.</p><p>“Why is that?” he asked warmly.</p><p>“I heard some thumping last night, and was worried maybe a water pipe had blown,” she explained, still peering around, trying to catch sight of the floor. “Because that noise couldn’t have been you, could it? Three years, and you’ve been rather good neighbours.”</p><p>Lorenz willed himself not to blush in face of the accusation. He bit his tongue a moment to try and help with this before gathering himself. “Did you hear anything else?”</p><p>She raised an eyebrow. “No, no running water like you’d expect, which is why I couldn’t be bothered to come check last night.” She narrowed her eyes and looked at him directly. “Didn’t you hear it?”</p><p>Lorenz reached up to touch the side of his neck, and could hear Fae and Claude snickering somewhere behind him. “You know,” he conceded, letting his blush take him this time, “we might have heard something like that last night, but I can sleep through anything. I don’t rightly remember.”</p><p>Manuela stepped back, ceasing her search as she sighed. “Okay, well, we need to keep an eye on these things.”</p><p>“We surely will,” Lorenz assured her, bowing his head. “Until next time.”</p><p>“Good bye, Lorenz.” Her voice was somehow both musical and curt, and full of suspicion. Lorenz was happy to close the door.</p><p> </p><p>He turned around to find Claude letting Fae back to the floor from something like a piggy-back as they both giggled. He raised a finger towards Claude as he threatened, full of amusement, “I’m going to throw you out the window.”</p><p>“You love me too much,” Claude retorted, sticking out his tongue, his voice already well recovered after several long swallows of water. Lorenz rolled his eyes as Fae chuckled, and so he whirled on them next, finger still extended in accusation.</p><p>“And you.”</p><p>Fae sobered, blushing. They nodded. “I’m sorry for banging on your walls.”</p><p>Lorenz curled his finger and brought it to his lips in thought as he mumbled, loud enough for them to hear, “She didn’t hear the voices though, that’s …” he raised his hand away from himself, shaking his finger skyward, “good information.” Fae and Claude shared a look of interest, and Lorenz crossed his arms as he asked Fae, “Don’t you have work?”</p><p>Fae shook their head, “I called out. So don’t make me go to the east end.”</p><p>“I suppose we did have a late night,” Lorenz agreed, looking sympathetic.</p><p>“If I hadn’t, I would have had … less than an hour's sleep,” they confided. “I phoned at 3:00 AM, claiming to have been up sick all night.” They tried to reassure the men in their company, now looking guilty, “It’s fine. I haven’t called out in, like, two years. Though it does kind of suck that it was on a Saturday.”</p><p>“You won’t be able to call out for another two years, likely,” Lorenz teased, stepping away to the kitchen.</p><p>Claude extended his arms, and Fae jumped into them so that their legs wrapped around his waist and he could carry them along behind Lorenz, continuing their game. Standing just outside the kitchen from where Claude could watch Lorenz, and from where the end of the hall and the door to the washroom was visible, Fae asked Claude, “Can I kiss you?”</p><p>Fae could see Claude looking over them to make eye contact with Lorenz, and smiled wider as they waited to see what the result of that was.</p><p>“Ask your girlfriend,” Claude said finally, eyebrows lowered in confusion.</p><p>Fae rolled their eyes as they insisted, “Not like that.”</p><p>“Oh!” Claude peeped, clearly embarrassed. “Then sure.”</p><p>With their arms wrapped around his head, Fae pressed a quick kiss to the crest of Claude’s cheekbone.</p><p> </p><p>Hilda exit the washroom dressed and with her hair up in a damp bow bun atop her head, and found the others in much the same position, Lorenz leaning on one arm lazily against the wall.</p><p>Fae leaned back from Claude’s chest and asked her, instantly, “Hilda, can I kiss Claude?”</p><p>With one hand raised, still confirming the stability of her bun, Hilda froze still for a moment as she answered, “Yeah?”</p><p>She sounded confused, and dismissive, as if it were hardly a question, and Claude felt a lump form in his chest. <em> ‘I suppose we were all just almost intimate last night…’ </em></p><p>Despite their blushing, Fae looked rather smug when they leaned in to kiss him. Claude adjusted his hands and his posture, so that he was leaning back to help keep them up while he closed his hands into fists in their shirt on their shoulders and up in their hair. Two more quick kisses followed, and then Fae was swinging their knees until Claude shifted himself again to let them down. He ran a hand over his cheeks and mouth, adjusting his beard unnecessarily as he smiled shyly at Lorenz, who licked his lips and moved lean back against his shoulders on the wall.</p><p>“Gods,” Claude cursed softly, “I can’t even believe I was crying yesterday. I feel like I aged a week in twelve hours.”</p><p>Lorenz stood up straight as he asked, “Alright, should I make breakfast? It wouldn’t be much. I’d be stretching five eggs into a meal for four people.”</p><p>“You two can eat,” Fae offered, looking back from him to their girlfriend. “Hilda and I could give you some privacy?”</p><p>“Oh,” he said, obviously surprised, “are you leaving?”</p><p>“You want us to stay?” Fae asked, equally unprepared, apparently, as Hilda trailed a hand down their arm and took a seat at the dining table. The others moved to follow her direction.</p><p>“Do we want to talk about what happened?” Lorenz suggested. “I am …” he hesitated as he found his seat, seeing the flush on everyone’s cheeks, “perfectly fine not talking about it.”</p><p>“Doesn’t seem that way,” Hilda teased.</p><p>“I enjoyed it,” Claude said instantly.</p><p>“Oh, me too,” Fae assured the table, linking hands with Hilda so that their muted soulmark was visible to the room.</p><p>“That wall though,” Hilda droned, as if this were a criticism, making slow and tempestuous eye contact with Fae before looking over to Lorenz.</p><p>Lorenz scoffed, happily. “This was not the conversation I was expecting to have, but, yes …” he folded his hands on the table, “the night was fun—”</p><p>“And the wall was a hindrance,” Claude agreed, tilting his head towards Lorenz, leaning forward on his elbows, winking at him.</p><p>“Yes,” Lorenz said with a smile.</p><p>“Some other time then?” Fae suggested.</p><p>Lorenz blushed, looking down at his hands and then back up to them. “Maybe.”</p><p>“Food!” Hilda declared suddenly, breaking the mood.</p><p>“Food!” Claude echoed.</p><p>“Let’s go get some muffins, a change of clothes, and do something,” Fae proposed.</p><p>“Yeah.” Claude agreed, looking to Lorenz for confirmation, “Yeah?”</p><p>“That sounds good,” Lorenz allowed. He ran a hand across his face before pouting awkwardly, “Can I take a few minutes to shave first?”</p><p>Claude snorted in amusement as Hilda laughed, taunting him, “Oh, you do hate being fuzzy.”</p><p>Fae let go of Hilda’s hand and shifted their seat closer to Lorenz so that he rolled his eyes and leaned towards their outstretched hand, squinting awkwardly as they caressed across his bristles.</p><p>“What if we said no?” Fae asked as they pulled away, and when Lorenz opened his eyes he could see that they were joking.</p><p>“What?” he prompted anyway.</p><p>“What if I decided I liked Fuzzy Lorenz and said you didn’t have time to shave first?”</p><p>“Fuzzy Lorenz,” Claude wheezed, covering his mouth as he laughed.</p><p>“Fuck off,” Lorenz chuckled, addressing Claude. “Maybe someday we’ll sort that out,” Lorenz said to Fae, raising an eyebrow, “but I’m going now,” he insisted, moving to stand, being caught by Claude, who pulled him by the arm down to kiss him before he could leave and orient himself to leave the apartment.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>We are 5,879/7,314 words into the outline!</p><p>Always be considerate of your roommates / neighbours. ^^;</p><p>Hope you enjoyed it! Would love a kudos or a comment ... &lt;\\\3</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Space Rocks</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>It turned out that there was next to no reason for Lorenz to be concerned for time, as even once he’d made himself presentable, Hilda was just finishing an application of day makeup, and then after, Fae and Hilda were happy to also wait out Claude. Eventually they left, in Hilda’s car, with Lorenz given the passenger seat — despite his protesting, to offer some room for his long legs.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She took them first for food, to a small, franchise coffee shop, where they sat and enjoyed muffins and bagels, tea and yoghurt smoothies. All the while, they needled each other over silly conversation topics, ensuring Claude was out of the shell he’d built up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So what do you want to do after?” Lorenz asked as he tried to get a third cup out of his same tea bag.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know,” Fae answered, folding a muffin wrapper into as small a shape as it would go. “I’m never off on Saturdays.” They exchanged a smile with Claude before licking their lips and looking to Hilda, “We could look at matinees?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No,” Hilda scoffed. “If we were watching a movie, I’d rather do it at home. Why lounge in public if you’re going to lounge at all?” She gestured to Claude, who sat upright, obviously uncertain if her attention was an implication.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Claude bobbed his head from side to side, considering his options, before he settled on his suggestion. “We could go to a museum?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hilda tossed her head back in a groan that was full of affection. “You big fucking nerd.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And say what you mean,” Lorenz teased.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What does he mean?” Fae asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Claude shrugged. “I like going to the planetarium.” He was more pointed when he declared, “I haven’t dragged either of you there in months.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Only because they haven’t had anything new,” Lorenz attested.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But it’s Saturday,” Hilda whined. “It’s going to be full of kids and their families.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Claude was on the verge of agreeing with her when Fae said, “But I haven’t been.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And then he and Hilda were exchanging a look that caused Lorenz to chuckle.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You and your fucking space rocks,” Hilda pouted, good humored as she rolled her eyes and fluttered her lashes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Claude was smiling wide, gesturing with a mostly empty smoothie cup. “They’re </span>
  <em>
    <span>space</span>
  </em>
  <span> rocks, Hilda! From space.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“All rocks are space rocks,” Hilda droned, unimpressed but fond, and Fae could hear an argument of years between them. “They can never stop being space rocks. We are,” she paused for dramatic effect, “in space.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I,” Claude choked on his voice for a moment, “need another word then, for rocks that were once inconceivable distances away from me but are now within range to be seen.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is there somewhere you’d rather go?” Fae asked their girlfriend, and Hilda paused and blushed, and looked away, first to Lorenz and then to the door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You will not get me to say that I want to go to the planetarium.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>With another soft laugh Lorenz concluded the conversation. “It’s not as if there are a ton of options. I think you’d be forgiven,” he said to Hilda, who made an aggressive slurp of her empty smoothie cup, tapping it down on the tray between them. He smiled at Fae with a nod. “It’s unanimous then.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They went to Fae’s apartment next, where Fae asked Hilda to join them, leaving Claude and Lorenz to wait in the car. Fae changed and grabbed a backpack, and took a long drawn breath before asking Hilda, “Are we … going to see where tonight goes?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hilda’s eyes lit up with mischief. “Oh, absolutely.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And so after brushing their teeth, Fae packed their toothbrush, condoms, gloves and a change of clothes, and when they made their way to Hilda’s, they grabbed similar items from her to add to their bag. They left their backpack in the trunk when they arrived at the planetarium however, not needing to be accused or embarrassed by a security checkpoint.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The planetarium wasn’t full to bursting, but there were a few families with loud children, pointing and screaming and falling asleep. Fae and Hilda garnered a bit of attention from the masses, as while Claude and Lorenz were dressed smart and casual, Hilda was a rainbow of pastels and plastic skulls, and Fae wore ripped jeans and a hoodie patterned like butterfly wings.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They spent two and a half hours or so reading trivia and watching short videos and standing far enough away from the interactive displays so as to observe them, while leaving them free to the whims of the younger audiences. Twenty minutes before reaching a room with meteorites and other astronomical oddities, Hilda had pouted sufficiently to be carried about by Fae, and made a show of pretending to pass out as they and Claude read through details of a particularly magnetic specimen.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You know I’ve always known this place was here — the planetarium, I mean — but I had never thought about how there were rocks from across the galaxy in my own backyard,” Fae said, leaning forward and bouncing Hilda on their back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I feel like most people don’t,” Claude agreed. “I mean … just think about it. They travelled untold distances, and they could have easily missed us, or burned in our atmosphere, but against all odds ended up here, intact enough to be an attraction.” He looked around at the uninterested museum patrons and sighed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Less likely than finding your soulmate?” Fae asked quietly, prodding his sensibilities.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz scoffed, and it turned into laughter as Claude smiled at Fae. Hilda bounced softly on their back, leaning the side of her face into their neck, laughing too.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“By far,” Claude confirmed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fuck soulmates,” Fae said thoughtfully.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fuck soulmates,” Claude echoed. “Give me space rocks.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fae stood straight and Hilda squeezed her thighs around their middle, righting herself. Then Hilda leaned back away from Fae, setting the pair of them off balance even as she took hold of their shoulders from this stretched out position and asked, “Fae, can I kiss Lorenz?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He blanched, and raised a hand to his chest, pressing upon it as if to shield himself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fae chuckled, “Ask Claude.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Claude looked to Lorenz’s state of surprise and decided, “Me first.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz smiled and rolled his eyes when Claude winked at him. Biting her bottom lip at Claude, Hilda nodded to beckon him closer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Claude had been expecting something akin to the quick, chaste pecks that he and Fae had shared this morning, but Hilda slid into him, soft and interested, and he felt his heart swell with the weight of his affection. He raised one hand to her neck and the other to the middle of her back, steadying her as he hazarded sucking her bottom lip into his mouth.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hilda’s eyes flashed open, but catching sight of Claude’s adoring gaze, she relaxed and simply closed them again as she wondered, </span>
  <em>
    <span>‘Have things always been pent up between us?’</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t a sensational kiss, nor was it particularly long or inappropriate, but that didn’t change what it was to them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re going to make the crowds uncomfortable,” Hilda whispered, warm and pleased.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good,” Claude answered, just as hushed. He smiled at Fae next, lowering his arms away from Hilda; leaving one hand up to hold the back of his neck, adjusting. Meanwhile Hilda looked to Lorenz, merry and welcoming as she called to him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lorenz?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz swallowed, looking around at the crowds and couples and then back to the others, who were all fixated on him now, apparently. Wincing, he looked to the floor and shook his head. He couldn’t handle the idea of someone watching and perceiving them all as deviants, and used to other judgments, his turmoil was transparent in its nature to the others. His hesitation was not without merit, and they sobered under the weight of it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Claude looked back between Lorenz and Hilda, frowning. “I’m sorry,” he apologized, weakly, worried about what he’d stolen.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Lorenz,” Fae interjected, trying to divert everyone’s discomfort. “Come kiss me then.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was impossible to hide the smile that bloomed across his features, though he did try, biting his tongue inside his mouth which moved his jaw in a way that was extremely telling. The others only thought it unfortunate in the respect that they’d have rather see him smile, unburdened.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It felt odd, to step around Claude and lean under Hilda, to find Fae’s mouth, but he did, and they smiled at him afterwards, offering some relief to his nervous heart.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“There,” Fae said, as if in assurance. “Now if anyone were watching we will pass just as couples, on a date.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ew,” Claude and Hilda said at once, each uninflected to portray their dismissal. Lorenz winced, uncertain again but for different reasons, yet Fae was smiling still, used to hiding under misinterpretations when necessary, and Claude and Hilda were snickering anyway at their shared reaction.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They wandered only a little longer before heading out, Fae setting Hilda down on the sidewalk so the pair of them could stretch.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Let’s do something more private now,” Fae suggested, turning to the men. “Unless you’re sick of us?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz could feel Claude beaming at him, and deliberately did not turn away from facing Fae as he answered, “Impossible.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Starting on the walk to the car, Claude offered, “If we do some groceries, we could pick up food for dinner?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A goal in mind, they made their way to a grocer, and parted at the door as Fae alerted the men, “We’ll buy junk and things.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Very specific,” Lorenz mocked, amused.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Junk food and drinks,” Fae clarified as Hilda pulled them along into the store.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Claude discussed what he wanted to prepare as he and Lorenz walked the aisles, filling a basket under Lorenz’s arm. He hesitated mid-sentence in the cold foods section to accuse Lorenz, if quietly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re buying eggs.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I…” Lorenz wavered, blushing and smiling, eased by Claude’s patient interest, “am buying eggs.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay,” Claude said, nodding; agreeing with the unspoken implications and breathtaking possibilities.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz almost laughed when they met up with Fae and Hilda at the cash, as their junk food was hardly that. An assortment of fruit, sesame sticks and bags of chips, soda and two bottles of wine made up their purchase. Meanwhile, Claude wanted to make something memorable for everyone, and had set his hopes on preparing what he called a “simple” roast, as it was already nearly three in the afternoon, and while the meat would not be properly prepared, he could still cook it over the next six hours so that it might be close enough to what he wanted out of it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>In a hurry as he was, Claude strode from the front door of the apartment to the kitchen when they arrived back, while the others were still stretching and removing their shoes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey,” Hilda beckoned Lorenz, touching his left wrist, but not grabbing him, as she sought his attention. She smiled. “You should kiss me now.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lorenz sighed comfortably, and wrapped his right hand around hers until she held him around the wrist as he leaned down, intentionally not far enough that she wouldn’t still have to crane her neck to meet him. He still wanted that assurance, that she was reaching out to him. He pecked her lips one extra time as he pulled away, letting go of her hand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thank you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My pleasure,” she assured him, her voice deep and earnest. She winked at him as everyone went to invade Claude’s space, washing their hands and making a fuss, and grabbing bowls and cutting boards as Hilda cleaned kiwis, strawberries and grapes, which Lorenz and Fae then helped prepare when the task spilled out onto the dining table.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When the fruit was ready to be eaten, Fae went to hand-feed Claude a handful of grapes, and Hilda grabbed a bag she’d brought with a few sets of unfinished earrings she was working on. She sat on the floor by the table in front of the television, and Lorenz stretched as he curled onto the couch and wondered about finding music or other background noise to fill the room. Although when Fae opened a bottle of wine and moved to join him, and asked if there was anything he wanted to watch, he did have a suggestion.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s a horror drama,” he tried to explain, “with supernatural creatures and bisexual … well, romance might be putting too fine a point on it, but…” he sighed, “romance?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fae chuckled, leaning into him. “Canon bis and I’m interested,” they assured him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hilda and Fae shared a glance as Lorenz found the program. </span>
  <em>
    <span>‘I can see everything you love about them, Hilda, and everything they love about you. I can’t believe they might love me too.’</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They had watched the first episode by the time Claude was satisfied with leaving the food to cook, pouring wine for himself, Fae and Lorenz, and sitting in the chair closest to the kitchen. After the second, Lorenz stood to turn on some lights for Hilda, as she continued her crafting. It was sometime during the fourth episode that the room went dark.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It might also have gone silent, were it not for Hilda’s squawk of distress, and everyone else’s small noises of surprise.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The power had gone out.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>HOLY MOLY! We are 6,057/7,314 words into the outline!<br/>I still love them. Hope the people who are coming back to read are still enjoying this too? I'd love a kudos or comment of reassurance! &lt;3<br/>Stay safe! Writing this during the COVID-19 outbreak is ... /:</p><p>I only ever saw the first season of Penny Dreadful, but that's what Lorenz put on ... but imagine whatever you wish!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. I Held You And I Knew You</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Are you <em> fucking </em> <b> <em> serious</em> </b>?” Claude asked with increasing urgency.</p><p>“Oh no!” Hilda peeped.</p><p>“Claude!” Fae called out, as he jumped to his feet, but Claude was already striding to the kitchen, despite his powerlessness over the situation, moving to stand over his dish.</p><p>“Maybe it’ll only last a few minutes,” Lorenz tried to assure him through the dark apartment, as he moved to follow Claude. “It might be fine.”</p><p>“Yeah,” Claude agreed, still not opening anything to check on the roast, sounding out that possibility in his head. <em> ‘If the power clicks right back on, then it’ll be fine.’ </em> “Yeah, you’re right.”</p><p>Lorenz rubbed at Claude’s upper arms comfortingly. “Just, give it a few moments and if the power doesn’t come back, then I can check the power company’s website…” pulling his phone out of his pocket, he frowned at his device, “on someone else’s phone.”</p><p>“Lorenz,” Claude groaned in disappointment, pulling away.</p><p>“I was charging mine,” Fae admitted, stepping around Hilda to unplug from the wall and retrieve their device.</p><p>Hilda lowered her head in defeat and embarrassment as she asked, “Can you use your light then? I need to tie this off or I’ll have beads everywhere.”</p><p>“Of course,” Fae chuckled, helping Hilda first. They grunted and giggled as she tried to tie a knot on a white thread with a shining needle by the white light of Fae’s phone. Fae looked apologetic when they finished, walking over to offer their phone to the men, “Here, Lorenz.”</p><p>He tilted his head curiously. “You don’t want to open your browser?”</p><p>Fae smiled so their teeth shone in the low light. “Do you need me to?”</p><p>Lorenz shook his head and took to task, noting that the last thing Fae had open was a search of the words “princess style carry.” After another minute he sighed, and squinting, admit for Claude’s sake, “It’s an estimated five hours.”</p><p>“Fuck,” Claude cursed. “That’s  … It can’t even refrigerate that long.”</p><p>“They could be wrong,” Fae pointed out, weakly. “Throw it in the fridge anyway, you can toss it later if it doesn’t work out.”</p><p>Claude groaned all through the action, and if nothing else, that had been telling about the trust he extended to the others. In any other company, he might’ve bottled that frustration even further, and silently suffered his upset. He intentionally bumped his forehead against the freezer door.</p><p>“I’m sorry, my love,” Lorenz cooed.</p><p>Claude took a few more seconds to let go of the time, money and emotional investment he put into dinner before nodding and turning around. “Let’s order something,” he suggested. “It’ll likely take a while, because of the outage — everyone will be ordering.”</p><p>“And it’s a Saturday,” Hilda warned from the living room.</p><p>Fae searched on their phone, seated at the dining room table with a fresh glass of wine and a forkful of kiwi slices, while Hilda continued putting away her things, and Claude unwound on the couch. Meanwhile, Lorenz fumbled around in his bedroom in search of a lighter — he knew where the candles were, but without a flame they were useless.</p><p>He lit three and left one on the table by the television, and brought the other two to the dining table, where the others had converged when they’d decided on a nearby halaal burger joint. Lorenz was placing his order when Fae observed, “The candles are nice anyway.”</p><p>Lorenz smiled. “I usually only light them for the aroma. I’m glad they’re as bright as they are.” When he handed Fae back their phone to finalize their order, he half stood to pull the lighter and a deck of cards from his pocket. He gestured with the latter. “Do we want to act like it’s a hundred years ago?”</p><p>“I’ll play with you,” Fae confirmed, putting their phone down on the table. Wide-eyed, Hilda tilted her head and Fae left their wrists on the table as they raised their fingers skyward and warned, warmly, “Stop that.”</p><p>Hilda bit her tongue at them, and then scrunched her nose at Lorenz. “Yeah, what’s the game?”</p><p>“Irish Snap?” Lorenz proposed, sliding the cards out of the box into his right hand as he looked to Claude who nodded, clearly more casual than a moment ago.</p><p>“I don’t know it,” Fae admit.</p><p>“It’s extremely easy,” Lorenz assured them, rifling through the deck to check for Jokers or instructional cards. “I’ll deal the deck, and we’ll go around clockwise playing each a card. As we do, we’ll count up — Ace, Two, Three, and so on.” He started to shuffle. “Whenever the card we’ve played matches the number we’ve announced, we’re meant to yell Snap!” He tapped the table far more quietly than what he anticipated would follow, and then squinted, wondering about his suggestion after the banging from last night, but he was so far into his explanation that it felt inescapable. “And we’ll all try to slap the pile in the middle fastest — the person slowest to react adds the pile to their hand. The winner is the first person to rid themselves of their cards. Good?”</p><p>“Good,” Fae agreed, chuckling.</p><p> </p><p>The order of the game was Lorenz, Hilda, Fae and Claude. The first round suffered no conversation as they found a rhythm in it, going around the table, unnecessary competition raising and nerves prickling as each played card offered no opportunity to strike the growing pile that swelled at the center of the table. A second round was played, and coincidence started to give way to absurdity and they were laughing and groaning through each played card.They paused before the third round to drink wine and teasingly accuse Lorenz of having somehow done this on purpose as the dealer. The game was suddenly strategic, with whether you played your card instantly, or waited to distract your opponents.</p><p>“So …” Fae giggled. “How much of the deck have you been able to get through before? With no matches I mean. Five.”</p><p>“I mean, it’s possible that it could be the whole deck, but that’s  … unlikely,” Lorenz allowed. He noticed Claude’s eyes flutter and his lips twitch, and pressed two fingers to his lips in a smile. “Claude, are you doing the math?”</p><p>“I…” Claude hesitated, shrugging, allowing the others to laugh at him as he smiled, “was trying, but then I remembered that the probability of a card coming up depends on the cards already played and I … would need more time and a calculator.” He laid his card down, a King, “Six.”</p><p>“Seven,” Lorenz said quickly, playing a Nine.</p><p>Hilda plucked at her hair tie, shaking her locks loose as she spoke, “I remember when someone said that the probability of meeting your soulmate was one in seven billion—”</p><p>“I hate that,” Claude interjected. “That’s bad math.”</p><p>Hilda tilted her chin into the candlelight, smiling affectionately, although her affection was somehow less than innocent. She gestured with a hand to Fae as she explained, “Claude spent days trying to calculate the real probability for how likely it was, based on living in a city, versus a town, age restrictions …” She picked up her hand. “Eight.”</p><p>“Nine,” Fae said quickly, a bubble in their throat distorting the word. Since it was a Two, they drank more wine.</p><p>“I was thinking too hard,” Claude whined. “I could never argue my point because I didn’t have an actual solution to put forward at the time. Ten.”</p><p>“As if you didn’t still argue your point," Lorenz teased. “Jack.”</p><p>“And loudly,” Hilda added emphatically. “Queen.”</p><p>“King,” Fae announced, playing another Two.</p><p>“Ace.” Claude pressed his index finger down atop his latest play (an Eight) to keep the game from advancing as he argued, “As if you fucks were complaining about my loud passion last night.”</p><p>Fae snorted in delight as Lorenz shook his head, insistent in his answer, “You’re mistaken even now if you think that we’re complaining. Two.”</p><p>“Three,” Hilda said quickly, playing a Queen.</p><p>“Four. <em> What the fuck</em>,” Fae hissed in amusement.</p><p>“With my luck this past month, we’re going to get through the whole deck and…” Claude’s eyes went distant for a moment, as he managed this calculation, “yeah. Yeah. It’ll be me playing the last card. Five.”</p><p>“Six,” Lorenz rolled his eyes, fond.</p><p>“You don’t think your luck’s been turning lately?” Hilda taunted, and then played her card before giving Claude a chance to answer. “Seven.”</p><p>The Seven of Hearts stared up from the table from where Hilda had barely raised her hand. “Snap!”</p><p>As a result of simple proximity, Hilda struck the card first, and Lorenz found that he was surprised that Fae’s hand found hers next, as usually Claude was so swift. He was next however; Lorenz’s long arms giving him a disadvantage that left his hand at the top of the pile with a sharp strike. Lorenz had been expecting to close his hand around Claude’s next, an assurance related to his lament for luck, but instead the four of them were met with a warm sensation.</p><p>It wasn’t heat, exactly, more like comfort, and a tug, from somewhere deep inside themselves, like the shock of missing a stair in a dark apartment, and an ... acute awareness of their soulmarks. They snapped their hands back towards themselves, a gasp silencing the room of the joy that had filled it but a second ago.</p><p> </p><p>“No,” Claude choked, holding his right hand in his left up near his heart, breathing as if he’d run a marathon.</p><p>“Wait,” Fae peeped, doing the same, tracing the soulmark on the back of their right hand with splayed fingers.</p><p>“No fucking way,” Hilda panted, her hands down in front of herself, slowly turned over to see the soulmark on the inside of her right hand.</p><p>Lorenz clenched his fists on the table so the front of his knuckles rest on the surface. He licked his lips as he looked from one shocked face to the next. “Did that … just happen?”</p><p>They might have each doubted a little more strongly were it not for the reaction of the others, but it still felt ... strange, foreign, impossible.</p><p>“I…” Fae started, unable to speak. Claude was rolling up his left sleeve, and Lorenz barely hesitated when he moved to undo the first four buttons of his shirt, pulling it open, running a finger over his soulmark, below the right side of his clavicle. He looked up to see Claude holding his wrist, looking at his soulmark on his forearm, distressed.</p><p>Lorenz extended his left hand towards Hilda as he begged, “Take my hand.”</p><p>She smiled at him, tangling her fingers in his and offering her left hand to Fae, who quickly repeated the action, reaching out to Claude. He seemed inconsolable, almost frightened, and swallowed as he slowly started to unravel himself, taking each Fae and Lorenz by the hand.</p><p>Another gasp, and Claude shivered and jerked, and Fae and Lorenz were mindful of whether he was actually pulling away. Stretched out as they were, the changes in Claude and Lorenz’s soulmarks were immediately obvious, a sheen of unnatural color staining their marks pale gold and deep purple. Hilda rotated her left hand to direct Fae’s soulmark towards the others; bright red flecks replacing the muted black-brown that had been there previously. Hilda’s own mark was lost in Lorenz’s grip, but neither had any doubt that she too was infused with color.</p><p>The sensation wasn’t so striking the longer it lasted. It would have been hard for any of them to describe. It was like ... overcoming an injury you didn’t know you had. Like breathing clearly after a long bout of sickness. Like the joy and relief that comes from mastering a long-practiced skill. Like hearing ‘I love you’ from a lover for the first time.</p><p>“I never knew how it worked for people like us,” Claude whispered, his voice full of shame. Polyamory wasn’t as rare as some made it out to be, but it was rare enough that none of them knew another person that had found themselves to have more than one soulmate.</p><p>“Is this how everyone feels? All the time?” Hilda wondered, her voice soft in the quiet shadows of the room. She looked from Fae to Lorenz as she continued, “Holding hands at the movies? Sitting side by side on the bus?”</p><p>“Kissing?” Lorenz suggested, and Claude hissed, as if sniffling, causing the others to look at him in concern, and found that once more after these past long weeks, his lashes shone with tears. “Claude,” Lorenz cooed. “Don’t cry.”</p><p>Lorenz looked to Hilda, and she nodded in understanding as they carefully let go of one another, revealing the verdant green of her soulmark.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” Claude sobbed, but it was nothing like before. Lorenz was standing and moving to comfort him, letting Claude’s arm bend at the elbow, placing his left hand on Claude’s neck as he led Claude’s arm around his body so that together they were cradling him as he rested his head atop Claude’s brown curls. “It’s just…” his voice cracked, “I thought I was crazy.”</p><p>He’d spent hours in his office, following the usual patterns and coming up with any of the three of them as his soulmate when he’d  been searching, and had thought that he couldn’t see the forest for the trees, that he was too close to his own life to look beyond. It was hysterical that he hadn’t needed to look further.</p><p>Fae squeezed his hand and Claude squeezed back, another sob tripping out of him. “But it’s really you.” He tilted his head to bump himself back against Lorenz, and opened his eyes, despite the fact that this let a tear fall. “All of you…”</p><p>This wasn’t fear or sadness. It was catharsis. It was relief. It was vindication.</p><p>“I know…” Lorenz whispered, his voice hinting at the tears he was fighting as he tightened his arms around Claude.</p><p>Hilda moved her right hand to fold over Fae’s, touching their soulmarks together as she said at a louder volume, “We know.”</p><p>Fae hadn’t realized until just this moment of revelation how much of themselves had been expecting the others to find their soulmates, had been expecting to be left behind or pushed away, had been expecting their feelings to be, ultimately, rejected. They thought of past lovers and relationships falling apart around them, versus Lorenz’s experience.</p><p>They nodded towards him with half a laugh. “You’ve had good judgment.”</p><p>“I…” Lorenz shook his head as he raised it, protesting. “No. Don’t credit me with this.”</p><p>He was horrified with himself for having been pushing Claude away. He felt like he had always been pushing everyone away.</p><p>“Why not?” Hilda teased, her smile cutting through him. “You were right.”</p><p>Lorenz opened his mouth to speak when Claude quietly added from under him, “About both of us.”</p><p>His eyes still wide in shock, Fae stepped over Lorenz’s reaction to interject, “I’m sorry I wasn’t around sooner.”</p><p>They smiled as Lorenz eased.</p><p>“You have <em> nothing </em> to apologize for,” he assured them in his deeply earnest way.</p><p>“Guys we have to move,” Claude insisted, raising his arm and pushing Lorenz further back from him with his right elbow. “I can’t have this table between us.”</p><p>Instantly Fae and Hilda were pushing out their chairs to join Claude as he stood and shuffled with Lorenz until the group was away from the table, attempting to find a comfortable way to vest each other in their arms, slowly risking letting go of each other’s hands to rest fingers on necks and wrists. Lorenz was the first to slip up, both of his hands finding clothing as he held Claude’s back and stretched his arm around the group. The soulmate connection was lost, and the others gasped and looked at him in accusation.</p><p>Lorenz couldn’t help smiling at their disappointment, for all his worries about his presence and actions being a hindrance to those he loved, they needed him … and they loved him, or so he could assume … because he loved them, differently and with different histories behind the berth of that word, but enough to feel mollified at being their soulmate, to know that this love could change or grow, and they would still be here, needing him.</p><p>“Sorry,” he whispered, moving his hand up to the base of Claude’s neck so that the group was again awash in sensation. “I was just adjusting.” He dipped his middle and index fingers down the back of the collar on Claude’s shirt, assuring them, “I won’t let go.”</p><p>They stood in silence for a few moments afterwards, swaying a little, cloying hands grasping at skin and clothing.</p><p>“It’s not fair that most people only need to worry about contact with one other person…” Hilda lamented.</p><p>“Are you disappointed?” Lorenz asked, curling a thumb over her ear.</p><p>She moved a hand up over his own, squeezing his fingers together as she stood straight to seek eye contact with him first, and then the others. “No,” she promised, looking back to Lorenz. “Never.”</p><p>“How many near misses have we had?” Claude asked, mournful.</p><p>“The past three weeks…” Hilda agreed.</p><p>“The past four years.” Claude leaned forward, bumping his chin against Fae’s forehead.</p><p>“We spent the last two days together,” they observed, laughing a little. They tugged at the others, “Let’s go sit—”</p><p>Standing straight, Claude interrupted, “Do you want to come lay down?”</p><p>Fae blinked at him, although it wasn’t quite in surprise. Their shoulders eased and their arms sagged as their hands sat heavy on Hilda’s neck and Lorenz’s wrist. “Yes.”</p><p>The four of them shuffled a step or two while maintaining connection, before giggling and letting go, allowing Claude to lead them to the bedroom, white and blue light filtering in through the window.</p><p>“I,” Claude started and stopped, pulling himself out of his shirts. After rubbing it over his tear-stained face, he winced. “I don’t want to risk losing contact for a while.” He was turning to face the others as he asked, “You don’t mind?” And found that they were all following his example, leaving their shirts in a pile on the floor. Blushing, Claude whimpered a small <em> ‘Oh’ </em> of understanding.</p><p>He let himself fall backwards, sitting on the bed, his arms straight down to either side of himself as his hands curled over the edge. Fae crawled up to his right side, tangling their right arm with his own, leaning their chin down onto his shoulder so that he could feel their breath on his neck. Lorenz sat by Claude’s left side, tangling the fingers on their left hands together as his right hand followed Claude’s shoulders up into his hair, scratching softly. Hilda’s fingertips found the front of Claude’s chest, bringing everyone back into the assurance of safety in being soulmates.</p><p>She slid her hands up on either side of his pecks, laying her hands flat against his chest as she pressed his legs together with her own. She sat in his lap as her left hand curled down under his arm, and up around his body, while her right caressed up over his neck into his hair, pressing her bra-clad bust up against his chest.</p><p>Fae leaned in to kiss Claude’s neck first, and Claude gasped and pressed his lips closed, worried about his breath on Hilda’s skin, but her eyes lidded in sensual amusement, as Lorenz nuzzled a parting into Claude’s hair and dragged his tongue up the side of his ear.</p><p>Hilda let her hand drip down from Claude’s scalp, across his cheek and his chin, fingernails gently scraping the curve of his jaw as he shivered and bucked forward twice, overcome by sensation. Claude whimpered when Hilda kissed him, Lorenz having bitten his ear and frightened the noise out of him.</p><p>They kissed and rolled around on the bed, trading places and partners and positions, and not daring to utter another word, for the next fifty minutes. Although sometimes they simply froze, not in fear or hesitation, but just in comfort, experiencing this new sensation together.</p><p>Claude was laying on his back by the edge of the bed, Fae laying on his stomach, when Lorenz noticed that the two of them seemed to be asleep. He ran his thumb back and forth where his hand was wrapped around Claude’s shoulder, and looked down to Hilda where she lay between them. She smiled, and moved her hand that rested on his stomach to wrap around him as she pressed her lips against the side of his ribs.</p><p>Lorenz gasped and sighed. “I can’t believe they fell asleep.”</p><p>Hilda hummed in agreement and moved to slip away from him, but Lorenz quickly rolled to his side, placing his left hand on her back to hold her close, not wanting her to bump against the others. Despite his surprise at their exhaustion, he was not unsympathetic to it.</p><p>“I’m glad that our soulmarks don’t glow, however,” he continued. “The light would get tiresome.”</p><p>“My pants are so uncomfortable,” Hilda grumbled, nuzzling her forehead against him.</p><p>Lorenz let his face crinkle affectionately. “Here. Touch Fae.”</p><p>Hilda looked up at him in suspicion for a moment before rolling onto her back, goosebumps rising in the wake of Lorenz’s fingertips as they traced over her skin to her collarbone. From her prone position, Hilda reached out and curled her hand over Fae’s wrist, as instructed, and Lorenz carefully let go of Claude’s shoulder, not wanting to shock him awake with the absence of soulmates.</p><p>After sliding down the bed, Lorenz moved to straddle Hilda’s hips, his hands on her waistline. They shared a smile as he slid his knees down closer to the base of the bed, letting himself fall forward until his face pressed into the curve of her ribcage, between and beneath her breasts. Hilda slid her left hand into his hair as he kissed her stomach and moved his hands down to the fastenings of her pants.</p><p>With the button and zipper undone, Lorenz moved both hands back to Hilda’s sides and tilted his head up to look at her, flush and entertained as she was. He pressed another kiss to her middle, and a third, and then more, as he moved his left hand to her back, squeezing himself to her for friction as his right hand sought her hip and tugged down at the side of her pants. He switched which hand held the curve of her spine and which worked at undressing her, back and forth, until her pants could be pulled away.</p><p>His eyes still closed, Lorenz slowly shook his head back and forth so that the tip of his nose tickled the base of Hilda’s stomach, close to the band of her underclothes. He lapped once at her skin and kissed the damp spot before making eye contact again, waiting for her judgment.</p><p>“That was hot,” Hilda cooed, swiveling her hips below Lorenz’s chest, and then laughing quietly as he made no effort to mask the desire that passed over his face. He opened his mouth to speak, when his phone started buzzing in his pocket, and so Hilda just laughed harder as he rolled on his side, crushing his right hand between both their bodies as he retrieved his phone with his left, and pressed the button to open the door, four floors down.</p><p>“The food’s here,” he warned, and pulled himself up to sit on his knees. He leaned down to kiss Hilda’s smiling lips once more and then left his soulmates, devoid of his touch. It was a stumble around the room, to grab a hoodie to zip over his naked chest, as Lorenz made his way out of their bubble of isolation.</p><p>Fae and Claude did wake with hissing breaths when their soulmate connection was lost, but they eased almost instantly, smiling at Hilda. Rolling off of Claude, Fae curled on their side so they would face him and Hilda could wrap around them from behind.</p><p>Claude squinted as Hilda’s bare leg curled over Fae’s jeans. “You lost your pants.”</p><p>“I did,” Hilda giggled, running her left hand over Fae’s bra, and then under it, so that they sighed and craned their neck to bump their head back against her.</p><p>Claude’s face fell in sympathetic desire before he laughed softly. He rolled on his side to extend a hand out to Fae’s hip, pressing his thumb just above their belly button. “Were you going to fuck Lorenz while I slept?”</p><p>Hilda clicked her tongue, unimpressed, curling her right hand around Fae’s neck so that her fingernails grazed their skin. “We wouldn’t have gone that far.”</p><p>Claude continued turning until he was mostly on his stomach and his right leg could tangle between Fae’s. He kissed their lips, and then bit their chin, concerns of breathing long overcome after the past few minutes. His hand skipped from their side to Hilda’s as he moved to kiss their breastbone. He was rather confident that, like him, the others would have thought that something like this tangle of bodies was forthcoming after last night, but he’d expected it to feel urgent, a bout of idiocy and mad passion, not slow, like this, full of affection.</p><p>Returned with the food, Lorenz blushed when they all turned to look at him.</p><p>“Should I put this in the fridge too?” He held up the plastic bag with their order, unzipping his hoodie.</p><p>“Just put it on the table,” Claude suggested, rolling away from the others. “Unless we want to eat?”</p><p>“Not food,” Hilda teased, pinching Fae’s nipple inside their bra so they gasped.</p><p>“I can wait,” they gasped, eyes glossy.</p><p>“I’m not starved either,” Lorenz promised, putting the bag on the table.</p><p>“Then come back here,” Claude beckoned, as Lorenz left his hoodie on the edge of the laundry hamper.</p><p>He stopped just shy of rejoining the others on the bed, steeling himself with a smirk as he unbuttoned and dropped his own pants to the floor, pulling them awkwardly off his ankles as they stuck, before letting himself fall into the mattress and be pulled into the assurances of the soulmates in his bed, safe to touch.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>We are 6,879/7,314 words into the outline!</p><p>Stay safe.</p><p>I'd love a kudos or comment. I hope that the build up to the reveal felt well explored and rational and was satisfying. &lt;333<br/>I was searching whether Princess Carry and Bridal Carry were the same thing. They are.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. But Fuck ... Soulmates (Claude x Lorenz x Fae x Hilda)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Lorenz turned on his side to kiss Claude over his shoulder, and he felt his heart tense as readily as he felt the awareness of the soulmark on the right side of his chest. Claude's mouth slipped away with a smile and a soft noise of amusement as his and Fae’s hands wrapped over each other on Lorenz’s side. Lorenz watched the movement of their hands and trailed his gaze up Fae’s arm to where he could see Hilda’s wide pink eyes, tilted up towards him, catching the light so that they were almost amber in the din.</p><p>“Oh…” Lorenz sighed. He licked his lips, seeking words as Fae pressed their right hand into his chest, warm and soothing. He chuckled. “This is lovely.”</p><p>He extended his right arm back behind himself to wrap around Claude’s hip while the group snickered too, whether at him or with him Lorenz couldn’t care, comfortable and enamored as he was. Pulling Claude closer, he leaned in to kiss Fae, eventually extending his hand to their chin and their neck as they pressed their tongue into his mouth.</p><p>Happy shivers traveled up and down his soulmate sensitive skin as Claude kissed the back of his neck and shoulders, and Hilda bumped the side of her forehead against Lorenz’s hand as she kissed Fae’s back. He opened his eyes when Hilda made this contact, uncertain what it was at first, and his curiosity pulled him away from Fae’s mouth to have a better angle at which to see Hilda.</p><p>She was smiling against Fae’s skin, curling her right hand up over their shoulder, tugging on the strap of their bra with her thumb so that the clearly unclasped material hung loose around their body.</p><p>“Oh,” Lorenz peeped, moving his hand so his thumb could rub a small circle over where the strap had left an impression on their skin. He made curious eye contact with Fae who was flushed and nodding, smiling shyly as he and Hilda helped them out of the garment. He kissed their lips at least four times throughout the process, in reassurance, in longing, in relief.</p><p>Hilda wrapped her hands around Fae’s breasts from behind them, pressing kisses into their spine, and smiled as her lover’s chest rose and fell in a deep gasp when Lorenz freed their mouth from a kiss.</p><p>He fit his hands over Hilda’s, and squished Fae’s chest up towards them, kissing the side of their face as he rolled his wrists against Hilda’s hands, forcing a massage, earning a giggle against his cheek. With an answering groan of pleasure, Lorenz stretched out a little more, pressing his ass into Claude’s lap and peppering kisses on Fae’s brow, as Claude’s gentle fingers followed the curve of Lorenz’s stomach below the band of his boxer briefs, no lower than the edge of his pelvis, tugging him against the swell of his cock.</p><p>Lorenz curled his fingers around Hilda’s and guided her hands slowly downwards, bending forward, forcing Fae and Hilda to shift closer to the head of the bed as he trailed kisses across their chest. He released Hilda’s hands when he could lap and suck at Fae’s nipples, and fit his arm around the pair of them, shifting his weight until he hovered over them on all fours.</p><p>“You are absolutely beautiful,” Lorenz promised, addressing either of them, both of them, all three of them as he looked at Claude. Resting on his right arm so he leaned into Fae and Hilda, Lorenz’s left hand sought the fastenings on Fae’s pants.</p><p>Hilda scooched aside so that Fae could lay on their back, while Claude crept closer, rubbing his left hand across the side of their face as he leaned in to kiss their smiling mouth.</p><p>Fae turned their head aside afterwards, to kiss Hilda next, scratching their right hand into Claude’s curls as he nudged Lorenz to ensure he had room to bite and pinch at Fae’s chest while Lorenz’s hand slid into the front of their pants.</p><p>Hilda linked her left arm around Lorenz’s right, to ensure their connection, should his task of undressing Fae lead him too far away. She shared a smile with Fae afterwards, as they panted softly, their shoulders tensing and relaxing in reaction to Claude’s affection.</p><p>Lorenz let his hand slide around Hilda’s arm as he slipped further down the bed, pulling Fae’s pants down their legs. They bent their knees to try and accommodate him, working one handed as he was, and accidentally kneed Claude in the gut so that he grunted softly. The four of them giggled as Fae apologized.</p><p>“Oh! Oh, no. I’m so sorry.”</p><p>“It’s worth it, it’s fine,” Claude joked, assuring them, pressing his smile back to theirs, curling his tongue against their lips.</p><p>Lorenz leaned into Hilda again, trailing the fingertips of his left hand up the inside of Fae’s thigh as he met Hilda in kisses. When his fingers found the cotton of their underwear, rubbing gentle circles on their cunt, Fae pulled away from Claude with a shy peep.</p><p>Fae chuckled when everyone stopped to look at them before they asked, “How much protection do we need?” They ran their left hand down over Lorenz’s between their legs. “We brought gloves.”</p><p>Hilda stuck out her tongue at Fae, and even with their romantic relationship so short, maybe it was a friendship of years or the fact that they were soulmates that meant Fae knew that Hilda was teasing them for being so concerned about their own intimacy just a few weeks ago, but willing to take the men at their word. Although, the men had had far fewer partners, and only each other for years, and there was a greater trust now between Fae and the lot of them. Hilda wasn’t offended.</p><p>“Protection might only be needed for convenience?” Lorenz suggested, shooting Claude a look as he sought confirmation.</p><p>Claude licked his lips before nodding. “We’re all safe — er, clean? As far as I’ve heard?” Hilda giggled, and he looked from her back to Fae, sheepish. “And I’m … curious.”</p><p>Fae smiled and turned their hand from Lorenz’s wrist to touch at Claude’s stomach. “Are you now?”</p><p>Claude nodded, a thick eyebrow twitching as Fae hummed in amusement. His winning smile crinkled his eyes and stretched across his lips as he kissed them again. Fae pushed against Claude until he was on his back — halfway off the bed and falling.</p><p>“Oh shit,” Fae laughed, reaching for his arm and helping orient the group until he could more securely lay back.</p><p>“We need a bigger bed,” Lorenz chuckled, sliding his hand down the back of Fae’s arm where he’d moved to reach out to them.</p><p>“Or more practice navigating this one,” Fae offered over their shoulder.</p><p>Laying back down was a bit of a production, pulling Claude closer to the center of the bed, pushing him back onto his back. He was smiling throughout the tussle; eyes safely closed, as he let himself be pulled about by warm sets of hands that secured in him a sensation that he’d harbored ill thoughts against for years now, but was suddenly here and comforting despite his anxieties and expectations. Goosebumps rose on his skin in waves.</p><p>Lorenz blushed and nodded as Fae swung their leg over Claude’s middle, straddling his stomach. Claude kissed them eagerly, running his hands up and down over their ass before creeping up into the curve of their back, gasping in pleasure as Fae bent and extended their knees in a few repetitive motions, rubbing their body down against his.</p><p>Hilda kept her hand around Claude’s shoulder to keep the soulmate connection in place. Fae was the first to realize it, and wrapped their hand around hers appreciatively, but when Claude reached out to tangle his hand overtop, Fae let go, leaving the responsibility of the connection to the other two.</p><p>With another peck to his lips, Fae crawled down across Claude’s body, running their tongue over his chest, pinching his nipples, and rubbing small circles across the rest of his exposed skin until they could run their nose back and forth over the line of hair at the base of his stomach, and kiss him softly as they worked at the fastenings of his pants.</p><p>Lorenz shifted, and ran a fingertip down the side of Hilda’s neck and then the curve of her hip as he reached out to hold Fae’s shoulder as they pulled Claude’s pants away, once again maintaining their connection.</p><p>“This is complicated,” Lorenz mumbled, full of affection.</p><p>“What is?” asked Claude, gasping as Fae squeezed at his obvious erection through his underclothes.</p><p>“The touching,” Lorenz confessed, accepting a kiss from Hilda as she went to hover over Claude next, blocking his view of Fae.</p><p>“It’s so nice though,” Fae whined, reaching one hand up to caress the curve of Hilda’s spine.</p><p>“Oh, no, it’s well worth it,” Lorenz agreed, making no effort to hide his delight, as he reached out to curl a hand under Claude’s knee, hitching his legs apart. Claude’s breath wavered as Lorenz moved to be next to Fae.</p><p>“It’ll be easier once we’re naked,” Hilda said, winking at Claude as she unclasped her bra. He could only nod, scratching softly at her thighs, pouting about the position the others had pinned him in.</p><p>Hilda echoed his affection, running her fingernails up and down Claude’s sideburns and the edge of his beard. He tried to tilt his head to kiss her hand or capture her thumb in his mouth, but then she pulled her hands away to either side of his head, falling forward to rest on her elbows. She purred as Claude nuzzled into her cleavage, and rocked herself from side to side to make room for his hands to hold and massage her breasts.</p><p>Claude answered her purr with his own soft moan, just as pleased, if a little more tortured than Hilda, as he used his mouth and hands to struggle about teasing her, while enduring Fae and Lorenz’s wandering caresses. They kissed and giggled about Claude’s predicament, still petting him through his clothes, and Fae nuzzled into the crook of Lorenz’s neck with an appreciative sigh.</p><p>“I’m so excited,” Fae whispered. “About now, of course,” they conceded as Lorenz snickered, “But about tomorrow. And the next day.” They left kisses on his neck now, and across his chest and Lorenz whined and shivered, curling his fingers around the band of Claude’s underclothes, lifting it and laying it back down, so that the head of his cock was exposed and held in place against his stomach.</p><p>“I can’t wait to learn how much more I’ll love you,” Fae insisted. “All of you.”</p><p>Claude leaned his head back away from Hilda, smiling at her as he called, “Better than any of your latest poems.”</p><p>Lorenz blushed and flicked three fingers against Claude’s cock to the sound of a stuttered cry, despite conceding, “You’re right.”</p><p>“You write poetry?” Fae asked, delighted, though not altogether surprised, and Lorenz took a deep breath as he rolled his eyes, running his thumb and forefinger along the head of Claude’s cock.</p><p>“When the mood strikes me.”</p><p>Hilda moved to shift further down Claude’s body and bumped against Lorenz’s hand.</p><p>“Oh, here. A moment,” Lorenz requested, and Hilda moved to sit up around Claude’s waist again, raising and lowering her eyebrows at him. Claude reached up behind himself to hold the metal headboard with a happy bite upon his lower lip, answering Hilda with a smile.</p><p>Lorenz and Fae shifted and brought Claude’s legs back together, pulling him out of the last of his clothes. As Claude’s stomach flexed beneath her thighs, Hilda ran her hands up and down his chest as if to soothe any nervousness. Fae kissed the inside of Claude’s right knee as they and Lorenz encouraged him to hook his legs up a little, and Lorenz pulled on Claude’s cock to point down towards the pair of them.</p><p>“Okay, Claude?” Lorenz asked, running his thumb back and forth over the head of his cock.</p><p>“Yeah,” Claude gasped.</p><p>“Okay, Hilda,” Lorenz confirmed, and she shifted again, laying more in line with Claude’s body so that she could kiss his lips and cradle his head in her hands. Claude was frantic, his hands fluffing her hair and clasping her shoulders as he reciprocated.</p><p>Lorenz shifted his dry hand back and forth along Claude’s shaft for a moment, as Fae settled down on their side, slowly leaning forward so that Lorenz simply held Claude in place as they wiggled their tongue against the head of his cock before sucking him into their mouth a few times.</p><p>“Oh, my—” Claude whined, cut off from his coherency and moaning as Hilda tugged his head aside and drove her teeth into his neck, and then her tongue along his ear.</p><p>Lorenz gasped in sympathy, unable to see more than Hilda’s backside but not needing to. He winced through a smile in answer to the look Fae gave him, as they lolled their tongue against Claude’s cock, slower when met with a drop of precum.</p><p>Leaning away from Claude, Fae ran their hand up and down Hilda’s back again, sitting up and warning the group, “I’m going to get my bag.”</p><p>“We have condoms here,” Lorenz offered, even as Claude and Hilda gasped and shivered as Fae moved away.</p><p>“Then get them,” Fae suggested, still continuing on their task.</p><p>Hilda bit Claude’s ear again before sitting up, rubbing her pelvis down against him. “Do you regret telling me how much you enjoyed that?” she teased as Claude ran a hand over the side of his neck. “Would you rather I’d found out on my own?”</p><p>Although Claude’s smile was answer enough, Hilda brightened as Lorenz asked, “What are you doing to him?”</p><p>“Just biting his neck and ears,” Hilda explained, and Lorenz froze at the dresser for a moment, turned away from them, a fond smile on his lips.</p><p>“I—” Claude laughed, “I’m flattered you remembered.”</p><p>Lorenz was blushing when he turned back to them and whispered, even as Fae returned to the room, “I can’t believe you’ve been gossiping about our sex life with,” he hesitated, taking a deep breath, “one of our soulmates. For years.”</p><p>Claude shifted his legs back on instinct as Fae and Lorenz sat back on the base of the bed. He reached out a hand to Hilda’s thigh as he marveled, “We have soulmates.”</p><p>“We have soulmates,” she echoed, rubbing her hand over his as Fae and Lorenz came into contact with Claude’s legs again, and their connection was restored.</p><p>“What’s this?” Lorenz asked, accusatory and excited, and Claude’s heart stuttered in anticipation.</p><p>“Hilda and I suspected we might be staying over again, but weren’t sure if you’d still want us confined to the guest room,” Fae said by way of explanation. “So, we brought this for some fun. Let me read your condoms.”</p><p>Lorenz traded with Fae and took a moment to inspect the little vibrator. It was metallic pink in color, but clearly plastic to touch, less than four inches in length and about as wide as his finger. He couldn’t tell if the base was meant to be as a dial, or simply meant to be screwed off for use of batteries, and ran his thumb over the give on the button on the bottom of the thing as Fae decided, “Yeah, we’ll use yours. They’ll be fine, and they’re what Claude’s used to.”</p><p>“Hilda, what are they doing?” Claude asked, adjusting himself beneath her.</p><p>She smiled, wicked, “I think they’re going to use a vibrator on you.”</p><p>“Only external,” Fae called, as if in assurance. “And only if you want.”</p><p>“Holy shit,” Claude laughed.</p><p>“He’ll be fine,” Lorenz promised, gently fondling Claude’s balls.</p><p>“Better than fine,” Claude agreed, strained, rolling his hips up towards Lorenz’s hand.</p><p>“Alright,” Fae said as they opened one of Lorenz’s condoms and dropped the vibrator inside.</p><p>“Oh,” Lorenz said in surprise and let his lips tighten in further surprise when Fae clicked the button on the base of the toy so that it sprang to life, vibrating so fast and loud that it was a blur to the senses.</p><p>Fae adjusted the condom and twisted the dial so that the vibrations slowed, and then clicked the button again so that they ebbed and swole slowly, before leaning back towards Claude’s cock. They left a kiss on the side of Hilda’s ass, wrapping a hand around her thigh as Lorenz grabbed the flavored lube from among the things he’d collected and drizzled some in his hand, stroking Claude slick, and ensuring his continued attention and arousal.</p><p>Hilda cooed about the way Claude gasped and choked when Fae pressed the pointed head of the vibrator against the underside of the head of his cock.</p><p>Fae waited for the ebb in the vibrations before asking, “Good?”</p><p>“Uh-huh,” Claude grunted. He swallowed and pinched his lips together as Fae drew a line up and down the length of his erection with the little buzzing toy, pressing the edge of it against the head of his cock as the vibrations peaked again. Claude moaned happily.</p><p>“I’m going to move,” Hilda warned, and Claude’s eyes snapped up to her, worried.</p><p>“Don’t go,” he whimpered, feeling Lorenz’s warm hand wrap around the head of his dick while Fae pressed the vibrator to the base of him, just above his balls.</p><p>“I’m not going away,” Hilda promised, shaking her head, curling over to his side, to lay next to him, a hand on his face.</p><p>Now Claude could see the others touching him, and his knees twitched, timid and stimulated. Fae caught his gaze first, and pressed a warm kiss against the inside of his leg again, clicking the button to speed and change the pulse of the toy.</p><p>Hilda shifted up closer to the head of the bed again, laying on her side where she could see the others also, and nudge her chest back towards Claude. He was inconsistent in pressing his blushing face and open mouth against her skin, often distracted by the allure of watching Fae and Lorenz, who were kissing now as Lorenz rocked the vibrator against Claude’s length, between the base of his middle and ring fingers.</p><p>Wondering about his impulse, but acting on it anyway, Lorenz moved to hold the vibrator against one side of Claude’s shaft, and ran his tongue back and forth over the opposite side of him, slowly moving to suck on the head of his cock. Claude whimpered in a way that was far worth it.</p><p>“Wait,” Claude gasped after a moment. “Wait.”</p><p>But after the first syllable, Lorenz had already curled his fingers around the toy and pulled it away, and leaned up to look at Claude in sympathy.</p><p>“Too much,” Claude admitted, pouting.</p><p>“I think that was plenty, anyway,” Fae said, running their fingers back and forth over where his leg met his pelvis. “For now.”</p><p>“Sit up, sweetheart,” Hilda said to Claude, rubbing her hand, fingers splayed, down the front of his chest, and he nodded as he complied.</p><p>Lorenz moved too, transitioning from touching Claude to touching Hilda as he moved to kneel behind her, up against the wall, arms around her stomach.</p><p>While the other three kissed, Fae removed the condom around the toy, throwing it onto Lorenz’s pants on the floor for easy discovery later. They sat on the edge of the bed, and held Claude’s hand as they pulled themselves out of the last of their clothing.</p><p>Lorenz helped Hilda lean back as she hooked a thumb under the band of her panties also, and instructed Claude with her eyes to remove the garment. She tilted her head back and kissed Lorenz at the unaccommodating angle, purring as Claude kissed the top of her right breast as he leaned forward to undress her.</p><p>“Hilda,” Fae called, and when they had her attention, they tossed her the toy.</p><p>Fae clung to Claude’s shoulder as he stumbled through rubbing at Hilda’s soft, wet pussy, and kissing her lips and chest while first she, and then Lorenz, held the vibrator to her opposite nipple. Fae crept their arm around Claude’s waist, stroking precum across his cock and kissing his upper arm as he curved his hand and pressed his middle finger to Hilda’s entrance.</p><p>Hilda moaned, and Lorenz chuckled. “Here Claude,” he offered, extending the toy to him.</p><p>With some instruction, Claude pressed his fingertip back inside Hilda, and slid the vibrator so that the side of it pressed between her inner and outer lips, and gasped with her when she squeezed around his finger.</p><p>Whining, Hilda reached for his arm and eagerly, Claude explored her pleasure until he whimpered with the realization that they were reaching a crescendo.</p><p>“Claude,” Hilda moaned, gurgled, and Fae nuzzled against him.</p><p>“Don’t keep her wanting,” they begged, mindlessly, and Claude shook his head, unable to fathom it. He sped the wrist of the hand that had a finger inside Hilda as she bucked against him so that his palm jut against the top of her cunt, adding more to the vibrations and the soulmate connection and being surrounded by her lovers...</p><p>“Fuck,” Hilda whined, and then chanted, repeating the word until only air left her lips, blushing, lost in ecstasy.</p><p>Hilda’s orgasm had been obvious and welcome and Claude pulled the vibrator away as he slowed his hand, wet and warm around Hilda’s sensitive lips. He swallowed as he extracted himself, running his fingers up over her mound, and his thumb back and forth along the silken petals of her sex.</p><p>“I — Claude,” Hilda gasped, catching her breath.</p><p>“You Claude?” Claude teased, moving his hand to her thigh.</p><p>“I love you, Claude,” Hilda said in a rush, pouting, and Claude felt disproportionately guilty for teasing, and leaned forward to kiss her deeply for a long time. He felt Lorenz kiss the top of his head and his body shook once in amusement, but his sincerity could not be mistaken when he pulled away and whispered, “I love you too, Hilda.”</p><p>“Do you want to fuck me next?” Hilda asked him, lounging in Lorenz’s embrace, blowing a tired kiss towards Fae.</p><p>Claude smiled as he glanced from her to Lorenz and back before suggesting, “I think Lorenz should.”</p><p>Lorenz blinked in surprise only until Hilda sat up and turned on her side, a hand on his thigh. She asked, “Would you want to?”</p><p>Lorenz looked from her to Claude and Fae also, seeking disappointment or jealousy, and finding none. He nodded to Hilda, adjusting her loose hair as he confirmed, “I would love to.”</p><p>They lost connection while they figured out what they were doing, propping Hilda up in the middle of the bed on pillows, Fae and Claude to either side of her, within reach to kiss her breasts or offer help or stimulation, while Lorenz dressed himself in a condom, and tried not to think to hard about the last time he slept with Hilda, sure they hadn’t been and never would be soulmates.</p><p>Lorenz ran a fingertip along Hilda’s cunt, and her body jittered, still stimulated and sensitive, relaxed and ready, and the mask of desire on her rosen face was enough to pull him back into the moment even before each of the other two took a moment to kiss her.</p><p>He crawled up on his knees, and rubbed himself against the top of her mound as he confirmed, “Like this?”</p><p>“Like this,” Hilda begged, also overwhelmed by the turn of events, feeling a longing for every person in the little room, wanting so much more than a moment of intimacy, but wholly and desperately wanting that too.</p><p>Bracing himself with one hand on her thigh and another on her upper stomach, Lorenz thrust himself towards her, slowly moving his hands to her hips as he adjusted until each motion was a smooth glide bringing them together.</p><p>“Oh,” Hilda moaned, “oh, Lorenz…”</p><p>And while he had recently heard her voice in ecstasy twice now, to hear her call his name broke his heart and fueled his desire. He propelled them faster, leaning to try and angle against her, moving one hand atop her mound and wrapping the other around an ankle bouncing beside his hip.</p><p>“Hilda,” he gasped.</p><p>Fae let their mouth hang open against Hilda’s bouncing breast, and slid their right arm down her middle, rubbing circles on her lower stomach and then the top of her mound when Lorenz realized their intention. He moved his hand down Hilda’s leg as he rolled his hips more slowly, and gathered her legs until he could press her thighs up together.</p><p>Hilda let her feet rest against his right shoulder as she moaned appreciatively, sliding a hand down Fae’s back, her left holding the side of Claude’s face as he moved to breathe in her hair and upon her ear, watching Lorenz from the corner of his eye, as his left hand teased back and forth across her breast.</p><p>When Hilda started to jitter and bounce, flexing her thighs and her ass, gyrating against Lorenz’s waist, he squeezed her tighter and pressed his open mouth to the side of her calve in a moan.</p><p>“<em>Oh~!</em> <b>Yes!</b>” Hilda cried. “I’m—! Lorenz—! <b><em>I—!</em></b>”</p><p>“Ha-ah... <b> <em>Oh!</em> </b> <b> Oh</b> , geuh… <em> Fuck... </em>”</p><p>He could feel shivers as far down as his ankles, but no more important than the awareness of his soulmark, than the throbbing of his cock. Lorenz let go of her legs, encouraging them around him, which she gracefully accommodated as he went silent and manic, holding her waist and fucking her faster and more shallow until he crashed their hips together one final time, and held her to his pelvis as he panted through his orgasm.</p><p>Hilda whimpered when Lorenz pulled away, too soon for her liking, but at least his hand was still on her leg, maintaining their soulmate connection as Claude kissed the side of her head and Fae placed a hand under her chin and led her into soft, slow kisses.</p><p>“Goddess,” Lorenz groaned, his hand twitching against Hilda’s skin.</p><p>Claude caressed his left hand down across Hilda’s body, rubbing a few more circles at the top of her mound as he nuzzled against her, and resisted humping the bed. Hilda moaned against Fae’s lips, “Nguh, fuck. Claude.”</p><p>“Oh,” he whimpered, stilling his hand, but keeping it wrapped around her. Fae was humming in amusement, kissing him next.</p><p>“Can I—?” Claude gasped when their mouths parted. Fae nodded towards him once, so that the tip of their nose slid across the side of his.</p><p>“Can you?” Fae prompted, and Lorenz, having thrown the tied off condom to where Fae had left the other, moved to lay between Claude and the wall, letting his hand skip from Hilda to Claude, breaking and restoring their soulmate connection so that the other three froze and sighed. He chuckled softly.</p><p>Claude licked his lips, his cheeks flush. “Can I taste you?”</p><p>Fae smiled and nodded. “No teeth,” they teased.</p><p>“No teeth,” he repeated, shaking his head, his body shaking once in a silent laugh.</p><p>They moved about so that Fae was curled up on their back, pelvis raised on two pillows, their shoulders back against Hilda, with the remaining pillows tucked behind her. Lorenz lay next to them on his side, his arm curled around one of Fae’s raised legs, within reach to easily kiss either them or Hilda.</p><p>Claude kneeled before the other three, reaching out to touch Fae’s thigh again, watching the red of their soulmark bloom on their hand where it clasped Hilda’s.</p><p>Resisting saying ‘I love you,’ on repeat, Claude leaned forward, kissing the side of their breast and the underside of their leg as he extended his left hand to curl his fingers around their lips, pinching and rubbing as his mouth drifted, and kissed the back of Lorenz’s hand. Pressing the side of his face into Fae’s leg he smiled at them as he brought his hand back to his lips and lolled his fingertips in his mouth before going back to touching them, leaning up to kiss Lorenz’s lips once before returning to his descent of Fae’s body; Lorenz and Hilda sharing a kiss next.</p><p>Placing his hands at the base of their thighs, Claude rolled his thumbs over either side of Fae’s cunt and mound, settling on his stomach as he sucked on the lips of their pussy in a kiss, watching their eyes close and their head tilt back into Hilda with a deep satisfaction. He closed his eyes and lapped at them, his shoulders tightening as their sighs and hiccups sang on the air, interspersed by the occasional bit of praise from Hilda.</p><p>Pulling away to lick his lips once, Claude asked, “It’s alright?”</p><p>He was shocked to see Fae’s strained and rosy expression, nodding desperately. Hilda was pinching one of their nipples and answered, “Keep going.”</p><p>Claude exhaled an excited breath, nodding before he nuzzled his mouth around their lips, eager to comply. Sloppy noises following the pace of his tongue. Fae moaned, and Lorenz murmured, “Oh, he’s good at that, isn’t he?”</p><p>Nodding again, Fae realized that Claude couldn’t see and so answered, breathy and passionate, “<em> Yes. </em> Yes, <em> Claude! </em> It’s so good. I — <em> Mm! </em> <b> <em>Ah-ha,</em> </b> <em> yessss. </em> Just—! Argh! Wait.” Fae laughed</p><p>“What is it?” Lorenz asked as Claude wiped at his mouth and Hilda stroked her open hand across Fae’s breast, soothing.</p><p>Fae gave him a sharp look. “Leg cramp,” they laughed, and his eyes blew wide as he let go of them, allowing their leg to fall back down beside Claude.</p><p>Lorenz covered his mouth a moment, but Fae was shaking their head, reaching up to his chin until he leaned down to kiss them, their body still shaking with amusement.</p><p>When Fae stretched back into Hilda, bending their knees to either side of Claude’s head, they started to ask him, “Do you want to—?”</p><p>But Claude was shaking his head, his words and expression strained by desire, and his cock twitching impatiently between his legs. “I want to make you cum. You… It felt like you were close?”</p><p>“Yeah…” Fae agreed. They swallowed. “Can you … finger me? While you lick my clit?”</p><p>“Fuck,” Claude gasped. “Fuck yes. I can … I can do that.”</p><p>He repositioned himself as much as necessary with the change in Fae’s positioning, but the pillows helped and soon he was sucking and lapping encouragingly as they’d asked, his right index finger feeling them, fondling them, finding where to piston back and forth.</p><p>“So … <b> <em>good.</em> </b> Claude,” Fae grunted, and he slowed his hand to curl his finger, careful and solid as he moaned around their lips. Hilda cooed as Fae started rolling their body up towards Claude’s mouth, grinding against him as they sputtered out half-formed words until their frustration changed to pleasure, and Fae stilled their hips; their pelvis jittering.</p><p>Claude was afraid to stop, the line of pleasure and completion not as clear with Fae as it had been for Hilda, and so it wasn’t until they curled a hand around the back of his head, and gasped out a sign of their overstimulation that he pulled his mouth away.</p><p>“Okay. Okay, please.”</p><p>He still kissed their wet lips twice more before sitting up and helping to pull the pillows away and set the vibrator on the bedside table. The lovers were less shocked now when the soulmate connection broke and reestablished as they settled back down.</p><p>Claude kissed his way from one partner to the next, shivering as Hilda purred in his ear, “Your turn.”</p><p>Fae hummed against his lips, pleased and thoughtful. “What do you want?”</p><p>Claude’s gaze flitted from them to Lorenz, although his attention was clearly distracted when Hilda caressed his face. He captured her hand as it made to drift away, so that he could kiss and bite upon the green soulmark on her palm. He looked back to Fae, blushing as he stroked a hand across their upper chest and shoulder.</p><p>“Do you want more from me?” he asked,  eyebrows knit in curiosity.</p><p>Fae shook their head, letting their expression show their confusion, “If I do we’ll get to it. You didn’t want to cum earlier, and you don’t want to answer my question now; are you uncomfortable?”</p><p>“No,” Claude answered instantly, blushing. “I … don’t want to disappoint, and…” He made desperate eye contact with his boyfriend. “And I want Lorenz to fuck me, like we usually do.” Claude felt his ears burning from his blush as Fae smiled and Lorenz’s eyes went wide. Claude confessed, softer, “This is all… I wasn’t expecting… I want something familiar. If we’re all okay with that?”</p><p>“Do you want privacy?” Hilda asked, looking from Lorenz to Claude.</p><p>Claude shook his head. “I don’t want to make you feel awkward for being here, but, no.” He smiled again as Hilda wrapped an arm around him and kissed his cheek.</p><p>Lorenz found everyone looking at him expectantly afterwards and smiled, meek, looking over the soulmates in his bed. He extended his left hand to Claude’s hip, kissing his forehead and then Hilda’s, because of proximity, stroking his right hand down the side of Fae’s neck as he confirmed, “Of course.”</p><p>“Alright, well, let’s lead into it?” Fae suggested. “Why don’t you lick Lorenz back to attention while I get you ready?”</p><p>Claude sighed, arousal clear on his face. “That sounds good.” When the others seemed to laugh at him, he tried to correct himself. “Nice? Good?” He snickered too, clarifying needlessly, “I would like that.”</p><p>Lorenz found himself laying back, an arm around Hilda at his side, kissing her occasionally, as Claude stroked and sucked flavored lube off his cock, already half-hard again from the atmosphere and the promise. Meanwhile Fae donned two of their gloves and massaged Claude’s ass.</p><p>They curled their right hand around the left side of him, prodding their lube-slick middle fingertip against his entrance. When Claude moaned, open-mouthed and stuttered, against the head of Lorenz’s cock, Hilda giggled about Lorenz’s stomach flexing and toes curling downwards.</p><p>“You’re so pretty, Claude,” Hilda cooed, rubbing a hand across Lorenz’s chest. “Lorenz can hardly stand it.”</p><p>“Shhh,” Lorenz hissed, strained and smiling.</p><p>“Me neither,” Fae teased, moving their right hand back and forth tugging upwards against him carefully, massaging his ass with their left hand. “Maybe you’ll let me fuck you sometime.” Claude moaned again, shaking Lorenz’s hard cock between his lips with the force of his hand. “Just need a new cock for my strap. The one I have now is just for Hilda.”</p><p>Hilda winked at Fae and Claude pulled off Lorenz’s cock with a pop.</p><p>“Wait, really?” he panted.</p><p>“Mmhmm,” Fae confirmed, driving their hand deeper and pulsing a curl of their finger so that Claude made a noise was all distraction and pleasure. Fae cooed encouragingly, pulling their hand back again to apply more of the unflavored lube and press their thumb against him, moving their left hand to his balls. “I would have thought Hilda would have told you?”</p><p>“She — she said toys,” Claude wheezed, smiling up to her and Lorenz.</p><p>“You’re ridiculous,” Lorenz sighed, extending his left hand to touch the back of Claude’s forearm.</p><p>“You love me,” Claude whimpered, finding himself accosted by a second finger.</p><p>“I love you,” Lorenz confirmed softly, gasping as Claude sucked him back into his mouth.</p><p>Hilda pursed her lips in amusement, and slowly slid down the bed to swipe back Claude’s hair, petting and playing with him as he continued his blow job. Once, when he pulled off to gasp, Hilda tightened her grip in his hair and he moaned, flush and eager, and she pulled him back a little farther than necessary to kiss his mouth, purring about the wet noise of Claude’s hand jerking Lorenz’s cock.</p><p>“Fuck, Claude,” Lorenz warned, not quite <em> there </em>, but still trying to steady himself.</p><p>Claude took the warning and let go entirely, gripping Lorenz’s pelvis and thighs as he started to bounce his body back towards Fae.</p><p>“Oh, you are pretty,” Fae praised, fingering him a little longer before moving their hands to his hips and pulling him back into an empty thrust, and Claude whimpered about the power in their hips.</p><p>“They’re good,” Fae said to Hilda when her kiss broke, and Hilda smiled kindly, all joy and excitement. She and Fae crawled to a corner of the bed, where Hilda sat in their crossed legs, her own wrapped up around their waist. Fae held a hand out for Claude to take as he laid on his back.</p><p>Lorenz bit Claude’s lips, his hands insistent in their direction. Claude grunted his pleasure as Lorenz guided him in place, laying down atop him, between his legs, cradling his back and kissing him deeply. He pulled away with unsteady hands to fit himself in a condom.</p><p>Claude started to let go of Fae’s hand, until he remembered that this was a <em> thing </em> now and something he wanted and needed, and tried to slide himself further down the bed with the force of one hand, bending his knees up. He squeezed Fae’s hand, as if in regret of even <em> loosening </em> his grip, and they squeezed back, assuring him. Lorenz returned, guiding hands on Claude’s legs, helping him fold back into a comfortable position.</p><p>Lorenz rubbed more lube around the head of his cock, and then prodded at his lover teasingly, stroking himself over Claude’s balls, retreating entirely so that Claude huffed in frustration. When he finally started sinking into Claude, slow and deliberate, he pouted with lust and emotion, and ghosted fingertips around Claude’s asshole as he confirmed, “Good?”</p><p>Claude nodded, silent and blushing and groaning in relief when Lorenz finally started to shift himself back and forth, deeper and deeper. It was slow, for a long time it was slow, and Claude shivered all over from the sensual connection with his lovers. </p><p>Hilda kissed Fae’s neck and rubbed her chest against them while Claude and Lorenz kissed and moaned.</p><p>Then Lorenz was speeding, laying a hand open and gentle on Claude’s neck, swiping it up into his curls, leaning back and squeezing at Claude’s cock so that Claude gurgled happily.</p><p>“Let go of Fae,” Lorenz commanded.</p><p>“What?” Claude whined.</p><p>“Just for a minute,” Lorenz begged.</p><p>Claude could feel Fae letting go before him, and pouted as the soulmate connection was lost and the purple of Lorenz’s soulmark faded back to the deep brown that lied about their compatibility. Lorenz shifted forward, his hands caging Claude in as he stilled for all of a moment.</p><p>“Every. Time,” Lorenz grunted through gritted teeth, thrusting himself sharply against Claude to punctuate each word. “<b>Every. Time.</b>”</p><p>Claude reached out to take the back of his thighs in each hand, distracted from Lorenz’s dilemma by the deep sexual satisfaction of each rapturous thrust.</p><p>“Every <b>time</b> I made love to you, I was having sex with my soulmate.”</p><p>Claude sobbed in surprise, his body tightening and bouncing against Lorenz’s cock. Having been able to express his sentiment, Lorenz moaned and started to speed.</p><p>“Every time,” Claude repeated, all relief and affection.</p><p>“Every time,” Fae whispered to Hilda, stroking a finger across her smiling face. They were making out again, Fae’s hand flat on the bed, extended to where Claude could reach in case he wanted to restore the soulmate connection, which he did, rather quickly, his every nerve alight as Lorenz whimpered on his neck, curled around him as he was.</p><p>Shifting his knee forward at Claude’s side to raise his body away from Claude, Lorenz wrapped his hand around his boyfriend’s cock again, and Claude was nodding, frantic. His left leg wrapped around Lorenz’s waist and bent inwards, pulling him closer as he tried to place this moment in his mind. <em> ‘I have soulmates. People I trust. People who love me.’ </em></p><p>“Oh, I love you. I’m cumming!” Claude said in a rush.</p><p>Lorenz didn’t declare it, but he didn’t need much more. He stroked Claude through his orgasm and ran his hand through the cum on Claude’s stomach, shifting half onto his heels so that he could thrust downwards into Claude’s sensitive body as he too found his peak. Claude was moaning choked and broken noises as he bounced himself back against Lorenz until Lorenz went still.</p><p>“Fuck,” Claude groaned, shivering as Lorenz pulled away, smiling as he turned to Fae and Hilda, chiding as if in fond exasperation, “soulmates.”</p><p>They both looked fond and incredulous, and Claude didn’t need to see Lorenz to know he was rolling his eyes.</p><p>Lorenz moved away from the group, and started disposing of their mess.</p><p>He washed his hands and found a tee shirt and some sweatpants and the others followed suit, cleaning up and redressing — barely; Hilda in her panties and her shirt, Claude in boxer briefs and a hoodie, and Fae in their panties and one of Claude’s tee shirts. They brought the food to the dining table, where they let Claude take a poor picture of the mess of cards, still scattered on the table where the candle had burned down in its glass, before setting them aside and sitting down to eat, bare feet tangled under the table, reminding them they were soulmates, as if this information would ever be forgotten.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>We are 6,948/7,314 words into the outline! Wahoo! akjdsfhlkajsd</p><p>I hope that this was worth the wait and consistent with the other chapters. I had to rewrite this when I did not like how meek Claude was turning out originally. I think I hit a good balance here. &lt;333</p><p>I love them! We have 1-3 more chapters to look forward to, I think. I'd love a kudos or comment, especially if you're a guest. Thank you for reading and all your encouragement!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. I'm Only Human</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>trigger warnings for: strained parental relationships, very light suicidal ideation</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>They were still up talking when the power kicked back on. Lorenz, Fae and Hilda squished together on the couch, while Claude had pulled a chair closeby. He released Lorenz’s hand when the group groaned about the sudden light and the pop of the television. Lorenz turned it off and on again to make sure it hadn’t broken, before turning it off yet again to return to the previous silence; while Claude hopped into the kitchen, confirming everything there was still soundly off.</p>
<p>When Claude returned, taking Lorenz’s hand again, he let himself be pulled towards his soulmates. He kissed Lorenz and then took Hilda’s outstretched hands to continue their connection as he released Lorenz to kiss Fae and Hilda next, letting himself fall into the seat farthest from Lorenz this time.</p>
<p>Hilda declared, “I’m texting <em> everyone </em> tomorrow morning.”</p>
<p>And the conversation turned to friends and family.</p>
<p>“I … just want to be sure,” Fae asked nervously, “if my father asks, we’re <em> together </em> now, right? We’re partners, and not only soulmates?”</p>
<p>“I think so,” Lorenz answered, looking to the others for confirmation. He ran the fingertips of his left hand along the back of Fae’s fingers, where their left hand tangled with his right.</p>
<p>“Only soulmates,” Claude snickered in amusement.</p>
<p>Hilda was resting back against Fae’s right arm, vested around her neck. She turned to initiate a quick kiss between the two of them. “That’s what I want.”</p>
<p>“Me too,” Claude confirmed, squeezing Hilda’s hand.</p>
<p>“He’s definitely going to want to meet you,” Fae warned.</p>
<p>“I think I’ll be able to hold off my family for a little while,” Hilda said, as if this was a consolation.</p>
<p>“Oh Gods,” Claude groaned, before laughing. He explained for Fae, “My family is … huge and intense. I’ll try to give us some time to adjust before… Maybe I won’t even tell them for a week.”</p>
<p>“Your parents will be so relieved,” Lorenz teased.</p>
<p>“What about your family?” Fae asked Lorenz, and he frowned. Claude and Hilda shared a look, but as Claude opened his mouth as if to speak on Lorenz’s behalf, Lorenz did answer.</p>
<p>“I … hadn’t spoken to anyone in my family for about two years now. I have a bunch of extended family, and my father, but… Well. I’m sure if I told him it would just be another way in which I’ve managed to disappoint him.”</p>
<p>“I’m sorry,” Fae said, softly, and Lorenz huffed, a soft smile on his face. He pressed a kiss to the side of their forehead.</p>
<p>“It’s fine,” he promised. “I suppose we’ll be sharing autobiographies soon.”</p>
<p>Fae opened their mouth while looking at Lorenz, but turned to Claude and Hilda before they spoke, nervous. “I think we should both have group outings, or hangouts, or whatever, and private dates. At least for a little while.”</p>
<p>“That sounds good,” Hilda said with a nod to Fae and Lorenz.</p>
<p>“Yeah,” Claude agreed.</p>
<p>Slowly, Lorenz nodded. “Okay.”</p>
<p>Fae shook their head, “We won’t keep you from your boyfriend, you don’t have to look so distressed.”</p>
<p>Lorenz smiled, incredulous. “It’s not that,” he said softly, and Claude pouted so he amended. “It’s not <em> only </em> that. I think I would like to sleep at home.”</p>
<p>“Done. Easily done,” Fae said as they bent their elbow to bring Hilda’s head closer to themselves for a moment, quickly relaxing their arm again and releasing her as she giggled, but Lorenz still looked pensive.</p>
<p>“I also,” his eyes flashed up from Fae to look at Claude, and his expression turned from solemn to sad, “want to tell you…”</p>
<p>Claude’s eyes went wide as he felt he could reason out where Lorenz was going with his nervousness, with their talk of families and soulmates and expectations, and found himself asking, “Why you hired me?”</p>
<p>Lorenz’s mouth went tight and he nodded frantically, looking away and back to Claude, squeezing his hands around Fae’s.</p>
<p>An insincere laugh escaped him as he started his story. “You remember my boss had me undergo training for that other certification a few months ago?” Claude nodded to his question, and Lorenz looked to Fae and Hilda and saw their quiet interest, their patient sympathy, and he grimaced. “Well, he ended up having to give the job to someone else when <em> his </em> boss found out that I actually didn’t have the requisite education. Which was ridiculous because the last three people they promoted in that way had my same level of education.”</p>
<p>“I’m sorry,” Claude started to say, but Lorenz continued, bitter.</p>
<p>“I’ve still been doing the extra work. No additional pay.”</p>
<p>“Lorenz,” Claude hissed, disappointed, but Lorenz just shook his head.</p>
<p>“It is what it is. I’d need to take at least one other college program, or wait for my boss’s boss to move on before trying again, but … I don’t know that it would matter. When they called me in to tell me … my father was there.”</p>
<p>Hilda’s eyes blinked wide open, surprised, but not horrified in the way Claude was.</p>
<p>“Your father was at your office?” he asked softly, his voice raising in volume with subsequent questions. “When? Why didn't you tell me?”</p>
<p>“I wasn't ready to talk about it,” Lorenz said stiffly, swallowing. He closed his eyes. “It was about four months ago now.” He opened them again, and they were glassy, but his expression was angry, and that took the wind out of Claude’s sails. “He asked me to ‘come home,’” Lorenz explained in disgust. “Said he would speak to the university about the credits I'd already earned. Implied I'd find my soulmate if I was back on the right path.”</p>
<p>“And you—?” Claude started to ask, but Lorenz was adamant, needing to be clear that this had not tempted him in the slightest.</p>
<p>“I told <em> him </em> I'd think about it, but I'm telling <em> you </em> that I'd never even consider it. And yet…” Lorenz held his mouth closed through a sob before continuing, “he did succeed in making me feel like a failure.”</p>
<p>“Lorenz,” Claude said, soothing. Hilda sighed sharply through her nose, and Fae pulsed their grip, stroking their thumb down the side of Lorenz’s hand.</p>
<p>Lorenz took a minute. He hadn’t expected to tell Claude like this. Claude was going to find his soulmate, and none of this would have mattered to him anyway … and Claude was not going to discover that they were actually soulmates, and that Lorenz was still capable of lying by omission. He had to hope that wasn’t a sign of being his father’s son, and confessed, “Every way that he was implying that I was hurting, I could see for you… I worried I had trapped you, in love, in debt, from taking your business more seriously when it made so much more sense to travel.”</p>
<p>“Hey,” Claude interrupted, insistent this time so that Lorenz clenched his jaw and looked away in shame. “I’ve <em> never </em> felt that way.”</p>
<p>Lorenz whimpered, on the verge of tears. He rubbed at his face as he conceded, “I know you wouldn’t.” He smiled weakly to Fae and Hilda. “I’m sorry to saddle you with this so soon.”</p>
<p>They were each shaking their heads.</p>
<p>“You’re fine,” Fae promised.</p>
<p>“What are you going to do?” asked Hilda.</p>
<p>Lorenz licked his lips and looked to Claude. “I think I need to quit my job. Maybe not right away, but … I need to find somewhere my father has no influence over.” He shifted, uncomfortable. “I don’t want to be a burden to you, either because I’m stagnating or unemployed or—”</p>
<p>“It’s okay,” Claude said, firm. “If you’d needed to have quit <em> then </em> I’d have understood. I wish you’d told me.” He sighed, and it was stuttered, strained. “I wish you’d trusted me. Even if we weren’t soulmates I wouldn’t have wanted…” He squinted and abandoned the sentence, Lorenz and the others knew. “Thank you for telling me now,” he said instead.</p>
<p>“I’ll work on my guilt,” Lorenz promised, a clumsy smile accompanying his pleading expression. “I was wrong, and I’m sorry, and I won’t be pulling away anymore. I wouldn’t want you,” and Lorenz swept his gaze over Fae and Hilda also, “to regret having me for a soulmate.”</p>
<p>“<em>That </em> won’t happen,” Claude insisted, standing, letting go of Hilda and rubbing the heels of his hands across Lorenz’s face, pulling him into a kiss. “You were still wrong though.”</p>
<p>Lorenz sighed, tilting his head into Claude’s left hand, looking at his golden soulmark. “Never happier to be wrong.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The apartment was too hot, especially for four bodies in a bed not made to accommodate them, and so after an hour, Fae and Hilda retreated to the guestroom to spend the rest of the night more comfortably. It wasn’t until after breakfast the following morning that they found themselves able to indulge in the soulmate connection again.</p>
<p>They texted their friends and families and made digital announcements, which had soon turned into phone calls from more animate supporters; including a call from Fae’s father, who was insistent and oblivious to how awkward it might be to ask to speak with the others. Fae waited until they were ready before setting him on speaker, refusing to force them into private conversations with him as first impressions. They blushed and avoided eye contact with their soulmates through his congratulations, offers of support, and declarations of the importance of time.</p>
<p>“Love isn’t hard to find, if you can figure out how to look,” he said, “but real understanding, that’s once in a lifetime, or,” he snickered, “three times over in your case, but it’s important, and if you’re right for Faedolyn then I have to hope you have some grasp of that already… Sorry. Listening to me ramble as if I have any idea what I’m talking about. Come for dinner, more than once. I want to know you, and I can’t imagine you’d have interest in texting an old man, so obligatory dinners is the best I can do. You can take me off speaker, Shiner.”</p>
<p>“Your father’s very sweet,” Lorenz said when Fae had finished their phone call.</p>
<p>“Shiner?” asked Hilda.</p>
<p>Fae nodded. “It’s a small freshwater fish, and I wish I could just blame it on him being big into fishing, but I was too. In fact... I guess this is when you find out my father and I lived alone on a mountain for most of my life.”</p>
<p>“You’re joking,” Hilda laughed. “How has this not come up?”</p>
<p>“I mean I went to school,” Fae argued, “but I’m really not. Dad repairs cable-cars, like ski-lifts and tourist traps.”</p>
<p>“How did you end up in the city?” Claude asked, sharing a look of confusion with Hilda.</p>
<p>“I was supposed to go to the university, but I got messed around with bursaries and couldn’t afford it. But I had the job and my own place, and I liked meeting people, so I stayed.”</p>
<p>“What were you going to study?” asked Lorenz.</p>
<p>“Education,” Fae said with a wince and a shrug. “They say teachers can find work anywhere. But having fucked up my own, I do feel like it sounds like a bad joke.”</p>
<p>“You still could,” Claude suggested, but Fae was shaking their head, smiling.</p>
<p>“Not if I want to have savings enough to move. I assume that’ll be happening sometime in the next year maybe? Moving in together?”</p>
<p>Claude frowned. “You shouldn’t put off going to school for … partners.”</p>
<p>“I’m not putting off anything,” Fae insisted. “It hasn’t been on my mind. There are thousands of people without an education, I’m in good company.”</p>
<p>“Florists don’t get retirement though,” Hilda contributed, tilting her head in weak opposition.</p>
<p>And Fae sighed and bit their tongue between their lips, in thought and consideration, before they admitted, “Next year, I’ll be as old as my mother was when she died. I guess I’ve been assuming I wouldn’t live that long, but … now that attitude wouldn’t be fair to you.”</p>
<p>“Neither is it fair to yourself,” Lorenz said quickly.</p>
<p>Hilda threw herself against Fae, arms around them, kissing their cheek. She pulled away with teary eyes and a mournful squeak as she turned back to Claude and Lorenz. “Shit, do we all need therapy?”</p>
<p>“It wouldn’t hurt,” Claude chuckled, sardonic, leaning forward on his elbow.</p>
<p>Hilda turned back to Fae, pouting, kissing their lips as Fae straightened her hair. “We’re going to be the most annoying seniors at the old folks home. Other people will bet their grandchildren about knowing four people who are soulmates, and we’ll get half their winnings just for holding each other’s hands.” Fae chuckled and so Hilda kissed them again. “You’ll look back at our life with me and be happy.”</p>
<p>“I am happy,” Fae promised, squeezing Hilda, helping her lean on her side and fall into their embrace. “I’ll think about our future, okay? I’m not planning on going anywhere.”</p>
<p>Hilda pulled Fae back towards her by the back of their head, kissing them again. “Okay.”</p>
<p>“Do we want to take a break before I call home?” Claude suggested.</p>
<p>Hilda was nodding, running her hands over her eyes. “Let me put on some makeup first but, I’d like to step outside?”</p>
<p>They walked to a corner store and bought actual junk food; chocolate bars and kettle chips. On the way back, Claude was walking with one arm linked in Fae’s, smiling about Hilda and Lorenz ahead of them, looking happy and relaxed.</p>
<p>“So let me preface <em> my </em> family stuff by saying I love my parents and think they’re good people,” Claude began.</p>
<p>“Oh shit,” they answered, as the impending ‘but’ that this sentence set up was … glaring.</p>
<p>He laughed. “<b>But,</b> that doesn’t mean they were great parents. They’re better now that all of their children are adults, and you missed the fucking years of awkward reconciliation that took, but things are still … weird, sometimes.”</p>
<p>“Okay?” Fae agreed as they caught up to Hilda and Lorenz at the apartment lobby.</p>
<p>“So I’m the youngest of six, and while my parents are soulmates, their parents are not.”</p>
<p>Lorenz mimed a whistle or exhale of breath, sharing a look with Fae as they frowned about Claude’s explanation.</p>
<p>“My father and his first wife had five children, and then when he met my mother — his soulmate, they just … broke up. He didn’t abandon his kids, or at least, that’s what I’ve been fed, and I’d be inclined to believe it because at my house this mess meant that every second weekend I had this huge family. Not <em> all </em> of my siblings, because there are thirteen years between my eldest brother and I, but the others. Anyway, so, things were strained between my siblings and my mother, even after their mother found her soulmate when I was about six years old, and I may have made my relationship with my siblings worse when I went into my particular line of work.”</p>
<p>Fae dropped their forehead into their hands for a moment before looking back to Claude, “I cannot believe I tried to talk to you about my parents' soulmate situation.”</p>
<p>Claude smiled, bright, “No. That was great, and I was happy you did. I just … didn’t know how to get into all this. I <em> definitely </em> know how finding a soulmate can be … hard, and not-great for everyone involved.”</p>
<p>“You make them sound so intimidating,” Lorenz criticized. “They really have been better to you the past few years. There’s a lot of love in his family, even with any occasional tension.”</p>
<p>“Let’s hope this isn’t one of those occasions,” Claude sighed. “They’ll want to meet you too.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Returned to the apartment, Claude called his parents, and agreed to dinner in two weeks, as Hilda had already invited their friends to his and Lorenz’s apartment to celebrate on the coming Friday. Hilda called her family last, first her parents and then her brother, and those phone calls were easily the loudest and most boisterous, but Hilda was right in that they’d agreed to meeting her soulmates at a later time so long as she kept them updated.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Lorenz had been surprised when Fae had suggested they might all be moving in together, but when the day started to drag on, and discussions started to be had of Fae and Hilda heading home, he felt his heart tense, and realized how logical that next step seemed to be. He worried about how far off the reality of it might be because of his impending unemployment, but after each workday that week, all three of his soulmates asked him if he’d quit, so that by Friday, he did put in his notice, satisfied with Ignatz’s promise that he could get him a job at the mail room he worked at, until he found something better. One less burden before their celebration.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>We are done with the outline! &lt;\3 I thought I'd be able to squeeze in some quick descriptions to get through and finish up! But no. I now suspect that we have at least 4 more chapters of my nonsense. Possibly more, if I write more smut or just take longer to explore certain concepts.</p>
<p>I hope this felt appropriately built up, because it, and what I'm still leading up to, was always part of the planned progression. I wasn't sure when to start injecting Lore into the AU, because I could've had the characters reminisce before now, rather than just info-dumping so far into the story... Hopefully it's okay! Objective Chapter 18 Complete, Codex entry unlocked! And even now there's still More Backstory that might creep in.</p>
<p>I'm so sorry for anyone who is less comfortable with any wild mood-swings between each chapter.</p>
<p>Let me know if you think it's worth exploring different date nights in this AU. I love your feedback! &lt;333</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. By Invitation Only</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>trigger warnings for: strained parental relationships</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“<b>Holy shit</b> you’re going through a crisis.”</p><p>Lorenz opened the door to the apartment for their latest guests, Leonie, Linhardt and Marianne. Previous to them, the only guests to arrive were those that Fae had invited, Flayn, Dedue and Dimitri, and while they hadn’t known Lorenz well enough (or at all) to see anything strange about six days worth of beard growth, he wondered whether he was prepared to face this reaction from so many of his friends.</p><p>Leonie’s exclamation had been spirited and confused; jokingly judgmental. Marianne covered her mouth with the side of her hand delicately as a snicker turned into a full on laugh. With an elbow to Marianne’s side, Leonie started laughing too, unreserved. Linhardt stood next to them, puzzled, tight lipped and brow lowered, as he grimaced politely.</p><p>Lorenz covered the lower half of his face with a hand, letting them have a minute of it before stepping aside to grant them entry, moving to hold his chin as he muttered, “I’m fine.”</p><p>They each hugged him on the way in, Leonie tight enough to get a grunt out of him as she asked, “So, what? You find your soulmates and just give up? Quit your job and stop shaving?”</p><p>“It’s trim,” Lorenz protested, and now Linhardt snickered, let in on the joke.</p><p>“It could be nice. After a few more days...” Marianne said softly. She gasped when Lorenz gave her a pleading look, and Leonie laughed again. She shook her head back and forth between them, mouth agape, before attesting, “It <em> is </em> nice. Just … different.”</p><p>“Very sharp,” Linhardt insisted, embracing Lorenz last. “I’m impressed with your mustache line.” He pointed back and forth with an index finger thoughtfully, but this only caused Lorenz to shake his head. “Congratulations, by the way.”</p><p>“Thank you.” Lorenz smiled and opened his mouth to continue, but Leonie interrupted him as Claude walked by, returning from the bedroom with a lint roller in hand.</p><p>“Claude. You let Lorenz live like this?”</p><p>Claude snorted. “No one says hi anymore,” he greeted, wrapping an arm around Leonie to pinch the back of her neck with his elbow. “You don’t think he looks like a young Toshiro Mifune?”</p><p>Lorenz scoffed and tossed his head back with a roll of his eyes, incredulous.</p><p>“I have no idea who that is,” Leonie said plainly and Claude turned to Marianne who was shaking her head, clearly showing that she also didn’t know, and not that she disagreed.</p><p>“An actor?” Linhardt suggested with a shrug of his hands.</p><p>Claude beamed. He winked at Lorenz. “Hilda and Ignatz would definitely watch Shûbun again.”</p><p>“He doesn’t even have a beard in that one,” Lorenz said, squinting, smiling.</p><p>“Yeah, but he plays a villain in the other one,” Claude whined, pulling Marianne into a hug so that she laughed about their conversation.</p><p>“Ginrei no hate.”</p><p>Claude stuck out his tongue, victorious. “So you agree?”</p><p>Lorenz blushed. “No, I just knew which movie you were talking about.”</p><p>“Lorenz, come drink with me if you’re already talking in circles,” Leonie insisted as she thrust a bottle of wine into his arms.</p><p>“I wasn’—heh. Fine.”</p><p>As Lorenz led Leonie through the kitchen to the dining table for drinks and conversation, Claude and the others made their way to the living room, where a few more folding chairs had been set up to accommodate the oncoming crowd.</p><p>“Dedue.” Claude offered him the lint roller, pulling him from a conversation, and the large man blushed, still embarrassed that when he’d removed his sweater that the shirt underneath had been absolutely covered in cat hair.</p><p>“Thank you,” he mumbled, accepting the item as he sidestepped around Fae and Dimitri before starting to use the device.</p><p>“Oh. What kind of pet do you have?”</p><p>At the sound of Marianne’s voice so close, Hilda turned and wrapped her arms around her friend from her side, squeezing her as she rocked back and forth. She kissed her cheek, but kept from squealing a loud greeting, as she let Marianne indulge in meeting a new friend, usually taking longer than five minutes to open up.</p><p>“My roommates have five cats,” he said with a hint of exasperation. “And one of them is pregnant. The others have since been fixed... It is a challenge to keep the hoard from my laundry hamper.”</p><p>“Do they have experience with pregnant cats?” she asked.</p><p>“You have my utmost sympathies,” Linhardt said, and grunted softly when Hilda nudged him.</p><p>“They do, though it isn’t something they’re attempting to manage on their own.”</p><p>“That’s good,” Marianne sighed, relieved. She added, cheery, “I used to foster a number of different animals, although lately I’ve given Lin and Leonie a break of it, and we only have birds in the house.”</p><p>“I don’t recommend them,” Linhardt confessed. “Cleaning the cage is tiresome, and they seem to easily forget what time of day is meant for sleep.” He turned to Marianne, assuring her. “Although they <em> are </em> good company, and smart enough that I question whoever coined the term ‘bird-brained.’”</p><p>“Oh!” Hilda peeped. “That reminds me, I have a few little reflective pieces you can take home for your babies if you like.”</p><p>“Thank you,” Marianne answered with a smile.</p><p>Hilda sat on the chair closest to the window and pulled her crafting bag out from under the coffee table, and Marianne sat next to her legs as she recounted how well received Hilda’s last gift had been, and well crafted, with no hazardous little pieces for curious beaks.</p><p>As Dimitri’s rant about injustice came to a close, he was flushed and embarrassed, and clearly looking around for Dedue, which allowed him and Linhardt to inject themselves into the group with proper introductions and handshakes. Their conversation changed to moving; each Claude, Lorenz, Fae and Dedue having had significant moves in their youth. This had piqued Claude’s interest, and soon he and Linhardt were discussing soulmates and gravitation and probabilities. The others left them to it to instead talk about drinking and college and dates as they intruded on Leonie and Lorenz.</p><p>Meanwhile Hilda and Marianne continued their whispers.</p><p>“You were worried about jealousy before,” Marianne observed when Hilda smiled about Fae and Lorenz sharing a kiss when he went to get the door.</p><p>“It’s different,” Hilda insisted. “It’s different because we’ve talked about it and it hasn’t come out of nowhere. And it’s different because it’s them.” She swooned at Marianne. “There’s such relief.”</p><p>
  <em> ‘Please understand.’ </em>
</p><p>“It <em> is </em> different,” Marianne agreed, but in a way that didn’t set Hilda at ease. “I’m glad no one is angry for it.”</p><p>Hilda pouted. “Are you worried for me, my precious little Marianne?”</p><p>Marianne giggled. “I haven’t been shorter than you in almost a decade now, Hilda.”</p><p>“So tiny, my Marianne,” Hilda exaggerated, sliding to sit on the floor next to her, shoving her bag back under the table. “Itty bitty, microscopic, infinitesimal. Smol.”</p><p>Marianne rubbed at her eyes as she laughed and tried to dismiss her blush. She sighed. “Yes, Hilda. I care for you, and worry sometimes.”</p><p>Lysithea arrived then, and after collecting a drink she moved to sit with Hilda and Marianne, and Hilda called out to Fae, beckoning them to come meet the ladies. Meanwhile the others moved to and fro, their gathering coming into swing.</p><p>Claude called out a question about whether people wanted to order, and whether they were still feeling curry. He was grateful when people were still willing to pitch as he placed an order with an Indian place, and surprised when the door buzzed almost immediately afterwards, but this was only Ferdinand, whom Hilda had invited on a whim. She eagerly set him up with a drink and introduced him to Claude, and the others; this work friend who had been privy to the strange blossoming of their relationship.</p><p>To no one’s greater relief than Ferdinand, he hit it off with the group quite well.</p><p> </p><p>“Aren’t you going to show us?” Leonie asked, referring to their soulmarks. “I can’t believe you didn’t take pictures.”</p><p>Hilda was not about to confess that she had failed for over an hour to get a photo of the inside of her hand that didn’t make her fingers look, what she felt to be, unflatteringly long.</p><p>“It’s not a parlor trick,” she argued. “Besides, unless it happens naturally, we’ll wait for Raphael and Ignatz.”</p><p> </p><p>To pass the time, and for fun, the table was pulled away from the wall and the extra chairs squished around it as the group started a session of shoots and ladders, with alcoholic stakes for those who drank. The rules were malleable, mostly because of the number of players, but a fuss was still made about the board pieces and keeping them in place when the game was set aside in a far corner on the floor when the food arrived.</p><p>Lorenz was holding bags of take out when his phone rang again, signaling someone else at the door, and he absently clicked the button to allow them entry.</p><p>“Raph and Ignatz are here,” he said to Claude across the crowd and the table as Hilda plucked dishes from the bags and set them up on the table.</p><p>When a knock came upon the door, Claude shared another nod with Lorenz and skipped around his guests to answer it, and almost immediately swung it closed.</p><p> </p><p>Claude stopped just shy of hiding his own face, his body suddenly stiff, rigid in surprise and anger. He said, hopelessly, “He’s not here.”</p><p>An older man in a sharp suit with long lilac hair stared at him with a familiar incredulity. A peal of laughter from the gathering inside echoed through the open door, and Lorenz’s father lowered his chin. With a sigh, Claude opened the door just enough for him to step out of it, and closed it behind himself.</p><p>“You <em> can’t </em> be here.” The sentence held so much meaning. It should have been incredulous, authoritative, but Claude worried it came across as plaintive, because he could have begged. The idea that Lorenz might easily develop a complex about every knock at their door signaling his father’s arrival was too believable for Claude to dismiss the thought. And then there was the reason for the gathering, something none of them needed infected by whatever Lorenz’s father was here to say.</p><p>Claude started leaning, directing the other man to step aside.</p><p>“And <em> you </em> can’t keep me from seeing my son.”</p><p>Claude smiled, empty, smug. <em> ‘Of course getting you to leave wouldn’t be as simple as that.’ </em></p><p>“Don’t need to. Door’s doing that.”</p><p>“If he doesn’t want to see me, then let him say so.”</p><p>As Lorenz’s father spoke, Claude stepped further forward.</p><p>“He has,” Claude said, his voice flat. “Many times.”</p><p>“He spoke to me recently.”</p><p>
  <em> ‘And what did you take from that encounter?’ </em>
</p><p>“Then text him,” Claude suggested, “call him, send a registered letter—”</p><p>“He doesn’t answer.”</p><p>“And whose fault is that?” The words were out of Claude’s mouth before he could stop them, and he straightened his posture in defiance, needing to stand by this conviction now that he’d poked the bear.</p><p>Lorenz’s father’s eyes widened, and then narrowed as he crossed his arms. He asked, skeptic and mirthless, “What’re you celebrating?”</p><p>The door moved to open then, and Claude grabbed the handle from the outside and slammed it closed as he answered, “We’re not.”</p><p>Some amusement crossed Claude that by now his leaning and direction meant that Lorenz’s father was not in line of the peephole of the apartment door, but it was short lived.</p><p>“Then are those hostages you’re keeping inside?” he taunted, and Claude held his tongue this time, and took a few deep breaths before accepting that there was nothing now to do but let this happen, and released his hold on the door. It didn’t burst open, but it was soon that Lorenz tried again.</p><p>“Claude, what is—?” Lorenz cut off, clearly able to see what the issue was. Claude turned his attention to his boyfriend, eyebrows knit, determined.</p><p>“Tell him to leave.”</p><p>Lorenz looked back between Claude and his father. Soft and defeated, he asked, “Claude, can you give us a minute?”</p><p>With a nod, Claude suppressed his desire to reach out to Lorenz, and left the estranged family to the hallway.</p><p> </p><p>The noise of those inside was quieter now … maybe. Lorenz had to wonder if it was imagined, and if they simply felt further away. Although he couldn’t know it, his mind traveled to where Claude’s had, frustration with his father’s appearance; he hadn’t ever come to his apartment previously. When he and Claude had first moved in, there had been polite excuses to keep his father away, but it had only been a few months before they were beyond polite excuses.</p><p>“Lorenz—”</p><p>“Don’t,” Lorenz interrupted, not needing his father to set the tone of the conversation. “What do you want?”</p><p>His father looked hurt as he answered, “To check on you.”</p><p>Lorenz’s shoulders twitched closer together as he accused, “After four months?”</p><p>“After you quit.”</p><p>Surprised at his own horror, Lorenz mumbled, “You’ve been… You’ve been watching me?”</p><p>His father sighed, obviously disappointed by this assessment, even unable to deny it as he was. “I thought you might seek a transfer to another medical office if you weren’t going to accept my offer. I wanted to know where you were.”</p><p>Lorenz raised a fist to his mouth, not sure whether he should laugh or cry about having led his father here by his own actions. He lowered his arms to his sides and concluded, “But I quit, and so you couldn’t find me.”</p><p>“You were supposed to come see me,” his father insisted, hissing, his voice raising in volume as his posture opened up with grand gestures. “And instead you’re, what? Celebrating a descent into vagrancy? Have you found another job?”</p><p>The desire to defend his life, his wit and his ability were strong, but Lorenz managed to quash the impulse as he declared, “I don’t have to answer that.”</p><p>“No, but it worries me.” His father swept his hair back, and Lorenz felt suddenly aware of every way he, himself, was disheveled. He had to resist touching his own hair, his face, his clothing, his nails. “You were trying to improve yourself, Lorenz.”</p><p>“And you swiftly put a stop to that.”</p><p>His father was exasperated, and whined, “You should be properly prepared for any challenge life has for you. The position wouldn’t have been a good fit without a complete education.” Lorenz swallowed, unsure of the truth of such a statement though it had warred within himself. He knew too many people now with logic and ability beyond his own that had no academic recognition. “You should go back to school ... whether in medicine, or business, or any other field that has taken your fancy. You’re not learning how to manage an estate in your current living situation, and I’m not going to be here forever to—”</p><p>“Don’t start with that,” Lorenz insisted, relieved his tone did not waiver.</p><p>His father stopped then, just for a few moments, and Lorenz could see the gears of his mind turning in those large blue eyes, and braced himself.</p><p><em> ‘You can’t make his life your problem. His life is not your problem. There are people just beyond this door who value your success and your life beyond what it would afford them. You don’t owe him time or pursuits or reasoning. You’re fine. You’re </em> <b> <em>fine.'</em></b></p><p>“I still have you listed as my beneficiary, Lorenz,” his father said, gentle.</p><p><em> ‘And there it is. He only wants you to act as an extension of himself. You would never be able to spend an amount that matters to help anyone. It will always be </em> his <em> money.’ </em></p><p>“I’ve known of many a young man to waste his youth in idle pursuits,” he continued, as if they were suddenly having a casual conversation of the children of business partners. “Although you weren’t travelling countries and continents, I assumed this is what you were doing with your little—”</p><p>“Don’t say it,” Lorenz begged.</p><p>“—love affair.” His father had been too far into his sentence not to finish it, and raised an eyebrow at Lorenz when he’d done so. Lorenz sighed, as, in the least, it was not the most offensive phrasing his father had used to refer to his relationship with Claude.</p><p>“But then you sought to improve yourself, and I assumed you were finally ready. That you finally recognized that I am getting on in years. It <em> is </em> time for you to accept the responsibility that comes with being a Gloucester.”</p><p><em> ‘You are the only Gloucester you’re responsible for,’ </em> Lorenz told himself, but remained unconvinced.</p><p>He looked away, shutting his eyes for a moment, blinking long and slow. Recomposed, Lorenz asked, “You really expect me to just pack my things and leave with you?”</p><p>“Nothing so dramatic,” his father said, as if this were an assurance. “But I do expect you.” He sighed, and spoke as if impatiently guiding a child, “I’d have thought you’d have learned by now that not every relationship has to work out. Family is what’s important. <b>You</b> are important to me. Come home and I will—”</p><p>“Raphael.” Lorenz had been rolling his eyes when he realized his distraction had caused him to miss Raphael and Ignatz leaving the elevator, now approaching, Raphael leading by great strides.</p><p>“Mr Gloucester, so nice to see you again.” Raphael extended a hand as he approached, and Lorenz swallowed. He wondered whether he’d ever seen his friend look so angry. He wore a smile on his face, but it was empty save for the rage that bubbled behind it.</p><p>“Father, leave. Now. By the stairs,” Lorenz urged, and his father had enough misplaced pride and hard fought ignorance to hold his ground, and turn slowly to the mountain of a man that approached, as if Lorenz’s offer were not a kindness.</p><p>While Lorenz might have mixed feelings about whether his father was in need or deserving of violence, he had no desire to have invited his friend into his home to be arrested for assault.</p><p>“Raphael, please,” Ignatz begged, seeming desperate. He wrapped a hand around Raphael’s outstretched arm, covered in a long sleeve shirt, until his soulmate dropped it back to his side.</p><p>“But the man should say hello,” Raphael said, his tone steady, but devoid of the joy Lorenz typically associated with his friend, “it really is the least he could do. Isn’t he supposed to be a paragon of manners?”</p><p>“I should say I am,” Lorenz’s father answered, offering Raphael his hand now to shake. “Do I know you?”</p><p>Ignatz covered his mouth with both hands, and Raphael and Lorenz made eye contact around his father.</p><p>“Raph,” Lorenz said softly, a plea for rationale.</p><p>Raphael’s smile faded as he looked to Lorenz, and instead he simply stared down Lorenz’s father, until the man frowned and lowered his hand. He turned back to his son and forced a handshake-hug on him instead, though Lorenz was still watching Raphael, and too distracted to do anything about what his father pressed into his chest.</p><p>After straightening himself, Lorenz’s father said, “Call me.”</p><p>He left the others standing in silence, staring at one another until they heard the elevator signal the older man’s departure.</p><p>“Raph—” Ignatz started, soothing, but Raphael snapped his arm away.</p><p>“Don’t,” he whimpered, a large noise for a large man. “Don’t touch me right now.” He turned to walk towards the staircase. “I’m going for some air.”</p><p>Ignatz stepped up to Lorenz instead, who shook his head as if relieving himself of a trance and then looked at his friend, sad. He apologized, worried his words were empty and worthless. “I’m sorry.”</p><p>“It’s not your fault,” Ignatz insisted, assuring  him, his expression meek and unconvincing, but still Lorenz smiled politely as they entered the apartment. More than half of their audience stopped silent at their entry and watched them suspiciously.</p><p>“It’s awfully quiet in here,” Lorenz said, trying to dismiss the awkwardness, fanning the paper his father had pressed to his chest along the inside of his left palm.</p><p>“What’s that?” Hilda asked, standing, just as many of the others, advancing on the pair of them as Ignatz removed his shoes. Lorenz found himself surprised Ignatz wasn’t more prepared to leave. He looked down at what he was fidgeting with.</p><p>“Um … it’s a cheque.”</p><p>“For what?” asked Claude.</p><p>“For how much?” piped Leonie.</p><p>Lorenz stared at it for a little longer, his mind too distracted to answer properly or to think of the impropriety of telling such a large group. “For … forty grand.”</p><p>“Wait, what?!” The exclamation had come from one of Fae’s guests, Flayn, but Lorenz was caught in Claude’s concerned eye contact, and addressed his question.</p><p>“He’s worried about me quitting my job, supposedly.”</p><p>Lorenz looked down at the cheque between his hands for a moment, before placing a thumb to either side of it and moving as if to tear the thing, and the room stepped towards him, those of them who were invested in what had been happening in the hallway anyway. There was a group gasp and exclamation, though Leonie’s voice was the loudest.</p><p>“Don’t!”</p><p>Lorenz winced and handed the intact paper to Claude. “You all think I should take it?”</p><p>Leonie scoffed. “Well you shouldn’t give it back to him.”</p><p>Lysithea contributed, “Even if you don’t want it, you could always deposit it and then donate it to someone in need.”</p><p>Running a hand over his forehead, Lorenz whined, “He’d just see that I took it…”</p><p>An uncomfortable silence followed and when Ignatz stepped up next to him, Lorenz looked from him to the others and muttered, “I … I’m going to lay down for a minute. Sorry, everyone.”</p><p>No one tried to stop him as pressed past a number of them to his bedroom, and closed the door.</p><p>Fae and Dedue exchanged a glance, and they leaned against him softly, allowing room for others to turn back into the living room as Hilda did her best to introduce Ignatz to Ferdinand and change the subject.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Should I have given Lorenz's father a first name? Maybe.</p><p>Writing and imagining his dialogue is just, paraphrase something my mother said to me, explicitly state something my mother said to me*, air a grievance with canon, air a grievance, air a grievance, worry that it doesn't sound believable or strained enough. Oh well!</p><p>*'not every relationship has to work out' was said while I was (and am) in a very happy relationship she disapproves of.</p><p>Ignore what I said previously about how long this is going to be. I'm just full of words. Some of them are nicer than others, but all of them are full of love for my characters. I wasn't sure if the party would be 1 or 2 chapters, but it's going to be 2, so look forward to follow up on the crowd. Also, I started writing this without Lin or Dimitri there and I was like ... okay but what if it had Linhardt in it? And then I had no excuse for Dimitri to Not Be There even if he hasn't had a true speaking line yet.</p><p>Hope you're still with me, and enjoying this. I'd love a kudos or comment, especially if you're a guest!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0020"><h2>20. What Are Friends For?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Lorenz stood with his back to his closed bedroom door a moment longer, wondering whether someone might follow him, or what else he might hear. There was some concern about whether they should leave, but Claude encouraged everyone back inside, and then all Lorenz could hear was the discord of their voices as people spoke over each other. It was hard to tell if it could be about him.</p><p>Sitting on his bed, he reached out to pull a pillow, first to his chest and then to his face as he thought of Raphael’s expression. It accompanied now a varied collection of disappointment Lorenz had cultivated for himself over the years. He remembered the blank surprise that had covered Raphael’s features something of seven years ago, and the rolling disgust on his father’s face some years later … an expression that by rights Lorenz should have been proud to pull out of him, all things considered. However, he now too had the memory of Claude’s horror when he’d shown up to hire him a few weeks ago, and had to remind himself that he’d specifically promised Claude that he wasn’t going to do this, to focus on his guilt.</p><p>
  <em> ‘Is guilt different than responsibility? Where does indifference start?’ </em>
</p><p>He fell into bed, one pillow under his chin and a second pulled up over his head as he thought of his mother’s face, and fought tears.</p><p>
  <em> ‘Does Raphael still have memories of his parents?’ </em>
</p><p>Lorenz felt his body convulse; a sob, if he’d have let it happen. He wondered about the insecurity of his bedroom door, being the only thing keeping his guests from seeing him like this. He squeezed his pillow more tightly to his ears.</p><p>
  <em> ‘Someone who needs it? What about compensation? Surely Raphael would find a good use for the money… What would your soulmates think of that? Goddess, what must Fae think of you now? Willing to abandon comfort and security, for pride? You don’t even know anything about their father. He could have medical bills or needs that you could help with that you were just going to disregard.’ </em>
</p><p>His mind skipped and spiraled until there was a buzzing in his pocket. Lorenz gasped as he hurried to sit up on his knees and retrieve his phone.</p><p>“Raphael?” he confirmed with the buzzer down on the main floor.</p><p>“Yeah,” came the answer, neutral and clear. Lorenz pressed the button to let him in.</p><p><em> ‘Fuck.’ </em> Lorenz wiped at his eyes. <em> ‘And what does it say about you that Raphael was able to compose himself first?’ </em></p><p>Standing, Lorenz shook his hands and paced a little, trying to will any blood that had flowed to his face back into his extremities. Using a mirror on the dresser, he adjusted his hair and ran a hand over his face again, contemplating his growing beard. It was a strange sensation on his face, and had been uncomfortable throughout the stress of speaking to his father, but his partners had expressed appreciation… It was hard to decide how he felt about it.</p><p>
  <em> ‘Do you look like yourself? Would you be more comfortable looking like someone else?’ </em>
</p><p>When he finally left his room, he opened the door to a different barrier, as Raphael stood immediately before him, hand raised to knock.</p><p>“Raphael, I—”</p><p>Raphael’s hugs were always all-encompassing. The shock to Lorenz’s system from where his mind and body had been a moment ago, to finding himself with one large hand holding the side of his head against his friend’s chest while embraced around both shoulders was … warm. Slowly, he raised his arms to hold Raphael around his upper back, and hissed in relief when they each squeezed a little tighter.</p><p>It lasted at least a full minute, certainly longer than a simple greeting. Lorenz felt calm and relaxed when he pulled away, and huffed as Raphael squinted one eye in assessment. Raphael smiled as he ran his hand down Lorenz’s hair to straighten it and a thumb along the side of his face through his facial hair. When he finally started to separate, Raphael said, friendly as ever, “It’s good to see you, Lorenz. It’s been too long.”</p><p>“It really has,” Lorenz agreed, walking with him down the hallway, jumping in shock when Raphael clasped both hands around his upper arms for a moment.</p><p>“Skinny as always; you sure you’ll be fine lifting those boxes at your new job?”</p><p>“I’m sure I’ll manage,” Lorenz answered, rolling his eyes and sharing a curt smile with Fae across the room where they ate with Dimitri and Leonie. “Ignatz can.”</p><p>“Sure, but he’s got me to keep an eye on his workout routine at home,” Raphael teased as they made their way to the others and their dinner.</p><p>“It’s all about repetitive motion, right?” Claude taunted from where he stood across the table, pumping a fist provocatively.</p><p>“Claude!” Ignatz whined, bright red and clenching his hands around his bowl of food.</p><p>Raphael laughed with Claude as he reached out for a bowl. He hummed in appreciation of the chicken and rice Claude offered him next. “You guys saved enough food for us, right?”</p><p>“There’s plenty,” Hilda promised, plating three more onion bhaji.</p><p>“Mm,” Claude agreed around a mouthful of food. “So go wild so we can clear the table and play another game?”</p><p>“What’d we miss?” asked Raph.</p><p>“Shoots and ladders,” Lysithea contributed from a seat at the table. “I won.”</p><p>“The game didn’t exactly end,” Claude said skeptically.</p><p>“You know I won,” Lysithea retorted.</p><p>Hilda barked a laugh before she cooed in excitement, “But Ignatz is here now, so maybe we’ll play pictionary.”</p><p>“That’s not exactly a game of skill,” Ignatz argued, a whine to his voice, smiling, tight lipped in surprise, as Leonie leaned around him from behind to tear at a piece of naan.</p><p>“Are you kidding?” she balked. “Have you seen my doodles?”</p><p>“I’ve always wanted to play pictionary,” Flayn contributed nervously from Ignatz’s other side.</p><p>“What’s stopped you?” Lorenz asked, his face crinkled in amusement as Hilda helped him fish out a dumpling from the malai kofta.</p><p>“My father is very particular about houseguests,” Flayn answered with a blush. “I suppose the answer is simply that there were never enough people around.”</p><p>Hilda winked at Ignatz, who shook his head and then smiled at Flayn as he conceded, “Well then who am I to say no.”</p><p> </p><p>Most of the open containers were scraped clean, and though Claude was skeptical about Dimitri and Dedue being satisfied, he trusted the leftovers to Raphael anyway, to snack on for the remainder of the night. Lorenz set out some multigrain chips, to the horror of some who’d eaten their fill, and Claude carefully selected books from a shelf to act as a surface for people to draw against, as a number of them got lost in their game. They had been playing for forty minutes before realizing that they maybe should have been keeping score, and shared a laugh about it.</p><p>The game became even more disjointed when Leonie claimed authority over the background noise and started playing a bunch of disco; and Dimitri was struggling to depict ‘scrambled eggs’ — “It’s not chicken shit. And no, it’s not broken dreams either.” — while Leonie, Hilda, Claude, Raphael and Lysithea laughed through an rendition of I Will Survive.</p><p>Eventually, Raphael did guess correctly, following a line of prompts from ‘broken eggs.’</p><p>“Oh, Goddess!” Leonie exclaimed when it was won, raising both hands to snap both thumbs for emphasis. “Fae, have you seen the food art that Ignatz draws?”</p><p>“What?!” Ignatz peeped. “Oh, no, please.”</p><p>Leonie smiled at him, pouting a little, lowering one arm across her waist as she snapped her hands in time with the music now. “Aw, come on. I’m shocked no one’s asked you to do menu art yet. It all looks delicious.”</p><p>“You really shouldn’t act so,” Lysithea shared a look with Raphael before settling upon, “humble, when people bring up your art if you’re really hoping to do something with it.”</p><p>“It’s a,” Ignatz stammered. “Well, it’s a hard habit to break.”</p><p>He was going through his phone to find some appropriate artwork while Fae confessed, “Hilda’s been sending me some of your other pieces.”</p><p>“And I’ve got to enjoy them also! Fae’s sent them to me,” Flayn added. “And they have been absolutely delightful! Well worth sharing.”</p><p>“You’re very impressive,” Fae echoed, accepting Ignatz’s phone to admire his art.</p><p>“Was this a roundabout way to make a dig at my eggs?” Dimitri mumbled, louder than he’d hoped due to the alcohol.</p><p>“I’m sure it wasn’t,” Ignatz answered. “Now knowing what they are, even your first sketch makes far more sense.” He clicked a photo of it with his returned phone and Dimitri looked more embarrassed than even Ignatz had. “Hard to depict eggs without color.”</p><p>“My apologies,” Dimitri said. “I didn’t mean to take away from your compliments. I too would love to see any of your work.”</p><p>While Ignatz and Dimitri hovered over his phone, Lorenz moved to walk across the room when Claude reached out to take him by the hand. With a smile, Lorenz let himself be led down into Claude’s lap, wrapping the hand that wasn’t holding a wine glass around Claude’s neck.</p><p>“You’re okay?” Claude whispered, with far more success than Dimitri’s aside, and Lorenz nodded and pecked his lips.</p><p>“I’m much better. I’m sorry about my father. You’re alright?”</p><p>“So long as you are,” Claude said, tilting his head back to try and kiss or bite the fingers playing on his neck.</p><p>“Good,” Lorenz attested, pulling his hand away and standing with a spin. He left his wine glass on the table beside Claude, realizing that slip and save was probably as dramatic as he needed to be for the remainder of the night, accepting more than Claude’s soft chuckling in attention as he continued on his way to sit next to Marianne on the couch where she’d nodded to him a moment ago.</p><p>Ignatz was pulling a stylus out of the side of his oversized phone case and moving to sit in a far corner when Claude and Raphael each stood to help relieve Dimitri of the hot-seat he found himself in, what with their game mostly abandoned. Seeing this, Claude let Raphael collect the relevant papers and mess, and instead reached out to grab a bouncing Hilda around the waist during the more lively portion of Donna Summer’s Last Dance.</p><p>When the song ended, it was succeeded by Can’t Get Enough Of Your Love, Babe and after just the first few words Claude and Hilda shared a look and cracked up laughing.</p><p>“Leonie, I love it, but you’ve got to modernize your taste in music,” Hilda said, wiping her left eye and leaning back against Claude.</p><p>“Blame your brother,” Leonie bit back. “He’s the one who shouldn’t have still had a record player when we were, what? Twelve?”</p><p>“As if you wouldn’t have found your 70s niche without him,” Hilda answered.</p><p>“Does he still have his collection?” asked Claude. “Or did your mom finally sell the rest of it?”</p><p>“She sold a lot of it,” Hilda agreed, “but there’s one or two boxes left.”</p><p>“Maybe I’ll buy a record or two for his favor and her annoyance before we take Fae to meet them?” Claude suggested.</p><p>“I envy you the ability to introduce your soulmate to your family,” said Dimitri, looking to where Dedue sat by the wall, Fae moving to sit next to him. “The most I have to share is a graveyard.”</p><p>“Have you been?” asked Raphael, swallowing some of a mixed drink Leonie had offered him. He clarified, “To the graveyard?”</p><p>“Uh, no,” Dimitri said, looking to the floor and back, “I thought it might be inappropriate.”</p><p>“Is it in town?” asked Hilda.</p><p>“No, it’s in Faerghus.”</p><p>“Ah, well, give it time then,” Claude said with a nod.</p><p> </p><p>Fae smiled at Dedue, quiet and rosy. Still they asked him, “You doing alright?”</p><p>He nodded. “I’m good. Your soulmates, their friends, are good people.”</p><p>“I know,” Fae agreed. “Dimitri’s good too; awkward at times, but no worse than the rest of us.”</p><p>Fae and Dedue watched Dimitri try to pull himself out of his sweater, something he should have done hours ago with the heat set as it was and the number of people in the apartment. His shirt stuck to the wool, exposing more than half of his stomach so that Claude and Hilda were looking around until they made eye contact with Fae and Dedue, and Hilda outright pointed at Dimitri’s chiseled body. Dedue chuckled as Dimitri tried to straighten himself out, red-faced, although obviously only half aware of what had just happened as Claude and Hilda smiled politely and continued their conversation.</p><p>“He has grown on me,” Dedue agreed, “which, I suppose is to be expected of soulmates.” He waited what he hoped was an appropriate amount of time before asking at a whisper, “What do you think of … what happened tonight?”</p><p>Fae could follow Dedue’s line of sight to where Lorenz, Ferdinand and Marianne were giggling away. They sighed and swallowed some more of their drink before conceding, “Forty grand is a lot to just drop, even on family.” They leaned their chin on Dedue’s shoulder. “Strangely, I don’t think it’s the money that concerns me.”</p><p>“It should.”</p><p>“I know.”</p><p>“What are we whispering about?” Flayn asked, sitting next to Fae.</p><p>“Money,” they answered.</p><p>Flayn looked to Lorenz and then back to her friends as she squealed, “Claude let me hold the cheque! I’ve never seen so much money.”</p><p>“Shh,” Fae hushed affectionately, and they could see Lorenz tense for half a moment, having certainly heard her.</p><p>“Oh,” Flayn peeped, covering her mouth for a moment. “I’m so sorry. I don’t mean to agitate anyone’s distress.”</p><p>“What does his father do?” Dedue whispered under the bassline of Disco Inferno.</p><p>Fae hesitated. “I … I don’t know. Tonight isn’t the night to ask.”</p><p>“I could, if that is something you would want me to do?” Flayn suggested, having already embarrassed herself.</p><p>“No,” Fae giggled. “I’ll ask him later, and share in a few days. Just worry about meeting him.”</p><p>“His values don’t exist in a vacuum,” Dedue cautioned, having recently struggled through his own financial discussions with Dimitri.</p><p>“You just said you liked him,” Fae teased.</p><p>“Me?” asked Claude, with an almost practiced timing.</p><p>“Oh, I adore you,” said Flayn, exaggerated and earnest, so that he winked at her as he pulled up a chair to sit across from the other three.</p><p>“You guys okay here?”</p><p>Dedue sat up straight. “How does the Indian food compare to Almyran?”</p><p>“Very similar,” Claude confirmed. “Which means, I ordered an additional butter chicken just to hide in the fridge. It’s always better the next day, after the spices have really had time to set.”</p><p>“That just sounds like you’re not using strong enough spices,” Dedue critiqued, kindly. “Food from Duscur must be prepared in a particular way, lest the peppers burn your hands.”</p><p>Claude smiled at Fae, who raised their eyebrows and nodded encouragingly. “I’m so interested in this,” he said, pleading with Dedue for more information. “Is there a restaurant you’d recommend?”</p><p>“Your best choice is authentic.”</p><p>“Are you offering to cook?” Flayn asked, excited.</p><p>“If you are, I could help,” Fae offered. “I wouldn’t want you to feel obligated to cook for more than two people on your own.”</p><p>“I could help too!” Flayn chirruped.</p><p>“I’m sure Dimitri’s got a huge kitchen,” Fae coaxed.</p><p>“He’s a fucking riot,” Claude said suddenly, amused. He asked Dedue, “When he’s sober, please remind him that he ranted about injustice to a bunch of mixed-race law graduates. Twice.”</p><p>Dedue chuckled with Claude before addressing the friends to his right. “We’ll see. I was, in fact, not offering. Just boasting that I still get to enjoy home cooking from time to time.”</p><p> </p><p>“I have to stop letting Leonie mix my drinks,” Linhardt said distractedly, staring at a half finished glass.</p><p>“At least you’re not dancing yet,” Marianne said softly, nodding to Hilda and Leonie, which Lorenz found hilarious.</p><p>“Hilda’s always two inhibitions away from dancing,” he reminded her. “No alcohol required.”</p><p>“She is exactly as I’ve been picturing her,” Ferdinand offered. “Or rather, she is very earnest. Her true self even in emails.”</p><p>“You’re like an old friend just made,” Lorenz said with a smile. “Or however that saying goes. It’s hard to believe we’re only meeting you tonight.” He opened his mouth and then closed it, before whining, “I’m sure I’ve left a just awful first impression.”</p><p>Linhardt squinted. “Because you had to lay down?” He snickered. “I have five times slept through my own birthday celebrations, and only three of those were on purpose.”</p><p>He raised his glass in salute and Lorenz smiled slowly, correcting him, “I meant more because of the business with my father.”</p><p>Ferdinand rolled his eyes in exasperation. “Goddess, okay, so, when I turned twenty, I met my soulmate, had known him a few years, and that’s a whole other story — but we went to my home to talk, and while we were, well, arguing, on the couch, my family burst in with their own argument.” He took a breath. “And that is how I found out I had a half-sister.”</p><p>“No,” Lorenz and Marianne gasped, while Linhardt snorted.</p><p>“No sense of timing,” Ferdinand agreed before assuring Lorenz. “We didn’t even see your father. Hardly as embarrassing.”</p><p>The four of them snickered about it and took to asking about Ferdinand’s half-sister, the conversation turning to other tales of disappointing fathers and family, and good moments shared with some friends and family. Lorenz was left feeling more assured about his connection to his friends than he anticipated.</p><p>“You’re still awake?” Leonie teased Lin as she sat on the arm of the chair he sat in.</p><p>“Is that what this is for?” Linhardt asked, gesturing with his glass. “A sleeping draught?”</p><p>Hilda skipped between Marianne, Ferdinand and the table to drop herself into Lorenz’s lap.</p><p>“You look lovely,” he slurred, wrapping his arms around her.</p><p>“Oh! Everyone’s here now,” Marianne pointed out.</p><p>“Oh, right,” Hilda agreed, distracted. “Lorenz, come here.”</p><p>“What is happening? Oh.”</p><p>He let her direct him to his feet by his hand and Hilda easily plucked Fae and Claude from their conversations so that she could force them into contact.</p><p>It felt a little silly, to be at the center of attention, but there were different things to offer assurance. Claude saw that each Raphael and Ignatz, and Dimitri and Dedue had subtly taken a moment to find contact, and he squeezed at each Fae and Lorenz’s hands. Fae had been holding their arm up to show off the back of their right hand and rotated it back and forth in a little dance until Leonie paused the music. Lorenz leaned down to press his chin against Claude’s forehead, letting go of his hand to run his fingers up and down where he displayed the gold of his soulmark. While Hilda chattered away beside him with Marianne and the others, Marianne tracing over Hilda’s soulmark on her palm as if reading it.</p><p>“I can’t believe your soulmark isn’t pink,” Leonie teased, sticking out her tongue.</p><p>“Green is nice,” Hilda fussed.</p><p>“Destiny really couldn’t have picked complimentary colors though, could she?” lamented Ferdinand.</p><p>“You guys are going to focus on the colors?” Claude asked, aghast. He led Fae’s hand into Lorenz’s so that he could move and break their connection. It was quickly reestablished as he wrapped a hand around the back of Hilda’s neck, “Come here.” He kissed her once in assurance, and Leonie made a noise of mock disgust.</p><p>“That’s weird. That’s weirder than the colors, you’re right,” she joked.</p><p>“Claude kissing me is hardly the weirdest thing,” Hilda whined, before finishing with a deep tone to her voice and a wink to Leonie, “but kissing him might be.”</p><p>“…Is it strange? Dividing your attention?” asked Marianne.</p><p>“I imagine it feels no different than having one soulmate really,” Hilda answered, even as the others scoffed.</p><p>“I doubt that,” Lorenz contributed.</p><p>“Especially considering when we’re not all four in contact…” Claude pulled away from Lorenz as he finished his already-known explanation, “we could easily have never known.”</p><p>“Not easily,” Fae assured him.</p><p>“It did take seven different coincidences for us to all touch,” Lorenz observed.</p><p>“True.” Fae giggled.</p><p>“I don’t think it’s that strange,” Ignatz said kindly. “You have a lot of love to give.”</p><p>“Lorenz’s beard <em>is</em> stranger than your soulmate situation,” Lysithea teased.</p><p>“I think it’s handsome,” Fae insisted.</p><p>Lorenz looked across the group before announcing, “You know what? I’m going to shave.”</p><p>“No! You’re drunk!” Hilda shrieked as Lorenz simply, walked past and around any who were in his way, to the washroom at the end of the hall.</p><p>“I’m not using a straight razor,” he answered, incredulous, but still there was a strange cacophony of noise as a number of his friends hovered outside the bathroom exclaiming warnings and assurances and advice over the buzz of an electric razor.</p><p>“Be careful. Be careful,” Marianne chanted.</p><p>“I’ll hold your hair back,” Leonie offered, to more than just Lorenz’s laughter as he held the razor far away from himself and leaned away from her.</p><p>“You’re too short, and I don’t need you to do that.”</p><p>A few short minutes later, and it was done.</p><p>“I miss it already,” Fae said with a pout, reaching out to take either side of Lorenz’s face in hand and accept a quick kiss.</p><p>“Aw,” Claude whined, “Leonie, Lin and Marianne never even got to make a comparison to Toshiro Mifune.” He turned to Hilda, “I said you might want to watch Shûbun?"</p><p>“Oh! Yes,” she squeaked happily. She added, worried, “If we’re watching movies?”</p><p>“Yes, please. Let’s do anything else now,” Lorenz begged, gesturing for the crowd to allow him to leave the washroom.</p><p> </p><p>Ignatz, Raphael and Lorenz moved the couch back away from the television before finding their seats here, and Dedue and Leonie each took a chair, while Claude and Hilda arranged pillows and blankets to allow for room for the remaining crowd to squish and lounge and lean. Laughter and defence and soft insistent romanticizing was shared about the fashion and script and acting, but still the story enthralled and whispered conversations mostly stemmed from the movie itself rather than additional gossip.</p><p>Gasps of surprise and coos of heartbreak increased as they approached the climax of the movie, with Hilda tossing her head back in an exaggerated sob when it finished.</p><p>“Why would you want to watch such a sad movie?” Ferdinand asked her, smiling and rubbing unshed tears from his eyes.</p><p>Claude was wrapped around Hilda, and answered with a wink. “To feel connected. I got to see you cry.”</p><p>“And it’s only going to get worse,” Hilda warned, standing up. “I’m putting on Ginrei no hate.”</p><p>“Alright,” Claude laughed, standing, “then I’ll do drink orders. Coffee, tea, hot chocolate?”</p><p>“I’m not driving, I’m mixing another drink,” Leonie said, moving to the dining table.</p><p>“I’ll help,” Lorenz promised, and kept everyone’s orders in mind while the other two focused on the tasks of preparation.</p><p>Ignatz shared with Raphael and Dimitri the completed, colored piece of scrambled eggs he'd finished over the picture of Dimitri's sketch from earlier, before figuring out the best way to share such a thing with the others over social media, so that he could hold onto his phone.</p><p> </p><p>The gathering spoke over the second film with more enthusiasm, whether about personal matters, or while yelling at or about the subject matter of the movie.</p><p>“Goddess, he even has the hair flip,” Leonie said about the actor Claude had said shared similarities with Lorenz.</p><p>Drunk now, and sipping warm tea, Lorenz said aloud, gesturing with his free hand, “You can’t say I look like him. I think he’s hot and that just won’t stand.”</p><p>“You can both be hot,” Hilda teased.</p><p> </p><p>At the first signs of violence and animal distress in the film, Marianne was gasping in horror, and Leonie shocked Linhardt awake as she exclaimed, “Oh no he’s a jackass!”</p><p>“It gets worse,” Lorenz droned, amused that Hilda was putting the crowd through the emotional whiplash of watching the actor play a kind gentleman and then a ruthless criminal.</p><p> </p><p>Sometime later, Dedue was standing to either seek out more tea or water, when Claude called to him from the floor, as a warning, “Wait, you’re about to miss the best part of the movie.”</p><p>Dedue lowered his brow and stayed standing, he and everyone now watching the screen in anticipation, when their attractive villain stabbed his chopsticks directly into a potato, and the room was awash in noise. </p><p>Lorenz, Hilda, Ferdinand and Ignatz were shouting out meaningless exclamations of horror. Fae, Dedue and Marianne were gasping in shock. And Lysithea shouted out an emphatic, chastising, “Rude!”</p><p>Meanwhile Claude tossed his head back in cackling laughter, which he tried to stifle quickly, as this moment <em> was </em> immediately followed up by a plot point. He asked Ferdinand, “Did you also just hear your mother screaming in your head?”</p><p>Ferdinand huffed, still full of dread and amusement. “My grandmother in my case, but … yes.”</p><p> </p><p>As the movie ended, Lysithea asked no one in particular, “We’re nowhere near a Rosen Morgen, right?”</p><p>“It’s only one in the morning,” Claude assured her. “Buses are still running for anyone who can’t drive, and the couch is available.”</p><p>“I have room for one more if someone needs a lift,” Marianne offered softly.</p><p>“I could take people home too,” Hilda suggested.</p><p>Claude squeezed around her as he whispered, “Would you be coming back?”</p><p>“You’re so needy,” Hilda teased, kissing him. She nodded. “I’d come back.”</p><p>It was another hour before everyone left, and between cabs and designated drivers, Hilda had not had to leave, and so after an emphatic farewell to Marianne, Leonie, Linhardt and Ferdinand, she found herself left alone with her partners.</p><p>Claude made a show of producing the cheque, for everyone to see and remember and be aware of, but he didn’t say anything about it as he tucked into the bookshelf between a collection of poetry and Isaac Asimov’s Robot Visions, to be addressed later.</p><p>“Still a good night?” Fae asked Lorenz, and he frowned and nodded, obviously trying to suppress something.</p><p>“Hey,” Hilda soothed, running her hands over one of his. “We love you.”</p><p>“I love you too,” Lorenz answered her, pulling her up into his lap on the couch, where he’d returned. After they kissed for a while, Claude extended his hand down Lorenz’s neck and chest from behind the couch to gather their attention.</p><p>“Come on,” he beckoned, directing the four of them to his bedroom for kisses and cuddles and compliments, until Fae and Hilda retreated again to the guest room, for sleep.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>If you're enjoying my modern-setting fe3h content, you might enjoy <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/Recurring/pseuds/Recurring">Recurring</a>'s fic <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23551843">Hate to let you down</a>. I highly recommend it.</p><p>Also <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-yy-I8rCs-o">go enjoy Shûbun while it's on Youtube</a>, and tell me that <a href="https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0042958/mediaviewer/rm1326821888">this screenshot isn't Lorenz and Hilda</a> (you are actually entitled to disagree, I'm just ... whatever). And <a href="https://omgkalyppso.tumblr.com/post/619211225429065728/toshiro-mifune-in-snow-trail-1947-dir-senkichi">here's a photoset from Ginrei no hate</a>.</p><p>I don't know why I made Leonie into disco, but it was either going to be that or latin music, with her, Hilda and Lysithea stumbling through El Chico Del Apartamento 512.</p><p>There was very little plot this chapter. Hope the characters still felt like themselves and that you're still having fun! This chapter was supposed to be fun! Mostly! akjsdfhlka I'd love a kudos or comment. Stay safe during covid-19, friends!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0021"><h2>21. To See You Again, To See You Often</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>trigger warnings for: strained parental relationships, previous parental death, class tensions</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Fae worked the following day, and Hilda returned home after driving them in, leaving Claude and Lorenz to clean their apartment. The rest of the weekend was spent lazing about comfortably, engaging only in casual conversation, digitally when separated.</p><p>They agreed to try going out on Tuesday, Claude and Hilda to a barbecue restaurant downtown, Lorenz and Fae to an Asian fusion place in The Village.</p><p>Claude felt hyper aware of his appearance all day, used to having time to prepare himself before a public outing, especially a date. They weren’t going anywhere special, and it was just Hilda, and he doubted there was little he could do to impress or disappoint her, but still, he was relieved to have kept an outfit to change into in his car when their day had finished, and, as he’d anticipated, she went to change. The relief faded to infatuation when Hilda returned in thick black nylons with little pink and purple stitching, and a red, sleeveless, turtleneck dress with black flowers patterned throughout.</p><p>Her hair had been pulled back all day, but she rubbed at it now, in a half bun so that pink spilled over her shoulders and framed her bust; long metallic earrings and a necklace of black plastic pearls hanging on her in decoration.</p><p>“You look stunning,” Claude said in awe, moving to stand and walk around his desk. Hilda smiled and moved to kiss him and his nose wrinkled in surprise, still smiling, as she’d obviously also donned perfume. “You did all that in twenty minutes?”</p><p>“I just changed,” Hilda said, shaking her head, acting unimpressed, but clearly satisfied with the compliment. She adjusted her hair again and Claude smiled about her bubblegum yellow nail polish.</p><p>“Did you always dress up like this when you went out before?” Claude asked, touching her upper arms, and Hilda just kept shaking her head, looking away from him as she pulled away.</p><p>“Not always.”</p><p>Claude couldn’t tell whether she was being bashful or simply didn’t want to think about it, and resolved not to ask again.</p><p>A knock came from the front door and Hilda flashed him a tight lipped smile as she went to let Fae in. He followed along behind, smiling as they gushed.</p><p>“Ah! Look at you!” Fae pulled her in for a quick kiss. “You look so beautiful. Tell me Claude’s called you beautiful already?” Fae teased, waving him closer until he was also within distance to lean down and kiss them.</p><p>“He said stunning,” Hilda allowed, walking back towards her desk.</p><p>“Good. You look—” they started to tell Claude.</p><p>“I’m still in my work clothes,” Claude promised, winking.</p><p>“Yeah, okay,” Fae agreed, laughing. They taped his chest once and tangled their hand in his as they followed Hilda along.</p><p>Hilda tossed Fae her car keys and then advanced to touch the side of their face with her right hand, taking Claude’s opposite hand in her left. Fae hummed comfortably for half a second before pulling away, “Okay, I’ve got to go so I can get a ten minute shower in before seeing Lorenz.”</p><p>“Have fun,” Hilda called with a wave.</p><p>“Drive safe,” said Claude.</p><p>“You too. Love you.”</p><p>The door closed before either of them could respond, and Hilda kicked herself up to sit on her desk.</p><p>“You worried about them?” she asked.</p><p>Claude winked at her. “Lorenz is worried about <em> me</em>.”</p><p>She scoffed in mock offense, and then snorted and rolled her eyes. “He would be.”</p><p>“Alright, give me ten more minutes in here,” Claude gestured to his office with his thumb, and then opened his hand, “and then ten more minutes in general,” and then closed his fist, “and then we can head out.”</p><p>“Hurry up, then” she teased, trailing a hand from his wrist to his elbow as he passed her.</p><p> </p><p>Lorenz was on his last week at his current job, and was relieved he’d have time enough to go home before heading out for the evening, even if that meant at least another two bus rides in his life. Resetting himself and his mindset were worth it, no matter the annoyance of having to go back outside. The cold wasn’t so bad, it was the heat of the buses and the establishments that grated on him. Even forgoing a sweater, Lorenz removed his coat when there was room enough for him to sit down on the bus, hoping any smells from the public transport didn’t permeate his clothing.</p><p>He was still carrying his coat when he walked up to the restaurant where he and Fae had agreed to meet. He was just pulling his phone out of his pocket when he saw them pulling up.</p><p>“What are you doing? It’s freezing,” Fae worried with a smile as they hugged in greeting, around his coat.</p><p>“I’m fine. It’s fine,” Lorenz laughed, half around them. “It’s good to see you.”</p><p>“It’s only been four days. Barely.”</p><p>“You’ve missed me too,” Lorenz observed, Fae’s arms still around him. They laughed as they pulled away.</p><p>“Of course I did. Let’s get you inside.”</p><p> </p><p>The restaurant was small, but not tiny — twelve tables in all, and they waved at the hostess as they took seats by the window, where they could see the snow and the city.</p><p>“So, three days left,” said Fae, referring to Lorenz’s employment. They smiled when he did, though he was looking at his phone, texting Claude to assure him of their arrival. “Are you ready for your next big change?”</p><p>“Eager, more like,” Lorenz agreed, adjusting his hair around an ear, red from the cold. “Still looking though, at other jobs.”</p><p>“What meets the criteria for you to apply? Could I help you look?”</p><p>Lorenz blushed and ran his right index finger up and down his left, “No. Thank you. My reasoning would seem silly.”</p><p>“Silly?” Fae prompted. “In what way?”</p><p>Lorenz sighed. “I want to help people. I think it was more that than my father which originally drew me towards medicine, but finding positions that I’m both qualified for and are beyond my father’s influence, or at least his notice, feels … practically impossible.”</p><p>A server came and poured water, took orders of drinks of beer and soda, and left them menus.</p><p>After swallowing some water, Fae asked, “So who is this horrible man,” and Lorenz failed to stifle a laugh, “that you call father?”</p><p>“He owns a pharmaceutical company.”</p><p>“He <b>owns</b> it?” Fae repeated, and Lorenz nodded. “Okay,” they said with a soft laugh.</p><p>“He’s a third generation, and thinks that means something. He’s a man who’s never wanted for anything, which, when I was younger, I might have interpreted as successful,” he conceded. “Now I know it only means that he’s selfish, short sighted and … some days I think he’s too stupid to be cruel, but with wealth comes the capacity for true malice…”</p><p>“Not very affectionate, then?”</p><p>Lorenz sighed and smiled weakly. “Contrary to what you might think, he <em> is </em> very affectionate. I was, for a time, his pride and joy. If anything he’s always invaded my space far more than I liked.”</p><p>Lorenz sat up straight. “Look, we, we don’t have to talk about him if you want to keep things casual. Very little on this subject will be.”</p><p>“I don’t want to pressure you,” Fae said quickly, leaning into the table.</p><p>“No,” Lorenz insisted. “No. I’m fine. You deserve to know, and at least while it’s us two, I won’t have to worry about the others worrying around me.”</p><p>Fae relaxed and stretched out across the table, taking Lorenz’s left hand as they asked, “Have they known him long? When did they meet you?”</p><p>“Claude moved far more as a child. He moved and met Hilda at twelve, and I moved and met them and most of our other friends at sixteen.”</p><p>“Why answer for Claude?”</p><p>“Context,” Lorenz said with another deep breath, curling his hand so he could rub his thumb on the base of Fae’s palm. “My mother died when I was fourteen.” His throat tightened when their eyes widened and he choked out as casually as he could, “Illness. She’d been sick half my life.” He swallowed, and his voice returned to him. “And it was almost in the same week as the funeral that I was sent away to a boarding school.”</p><p>“Lorenz,” Fae said, surprised, at a bit of a loss, and he nodded, as if this was what he was expecting. “I… It occurred to me that you hadn’t mentioned your mother, but…”</p><p>“Sorry for springing that on you,” he said, wincing and pulling away.</p><p>Fae shook their head, “No, I’m … I’m sorry, for your loss, and everything.”</p><p>They pursed their lips, watching their mental picture of Lorenz repaint itself. They’d often wondered how they might be different, if they’d known their mother, whether it would have been harder to lose than to never know. They pictured Lorenz at ten years old, deciding he wanted to be a doctor by his ailing mother’s bedside, and then at twenty, abandoning that dream when others crashed around him.</p><p>“I, well…” Lorenz brought his hand to his neck and drank more water, apparently unable to follow through with consoling them that it was a long time ago. “Thank you.”</p><p>The server returned with their drinks, and Fae and Lorenz apologized for yet being unable to order, and were once again left alone.</p><p>“Have you ever been here?” Lorenz asked.</p><p>“No, only walked by. Have you?”</p><p>With a nod Lorenz moved into the seat facing the window, to be closer to Fae, helping them navigate the menu, though the pair of them settled on nothing particularly adventurous, soy chicken thighs, vegetables, and an order of gyoza, to share. When this was decided, Lorenz was already leaning so close to Fae, that for a moment he considered kissing them, surely inappropriate for this moment on a regular date, but they had already kissed so deep and so often, that he floundered on the simplicity of the action.</p><p>Instead he admired them, the layers in their mint green hair, their silver rain cloud earrings, the curve of a curious laugh line, the pout of their lips.</p><p>“You look lovely,” Lorenz said, returning to his seat across from them.</p><p>Fae lowered their brow skeptically. “Looking to avoid talking about boarding school?”</p><p>“No,” Lorenz gasped, and relaxed when they made a soft noise of amusement. “I should have said it earlier,” he whined.</p><p>Fae looked again at Lorenz, wearing a watch, as they hadn’t noticed before, in a button up shirt of dark teal, with pale, peach flowers.</p><p>“That’s a nice shirt,” they teased. “And you’re quite handsome.”</p><p>Lorenz tilted his head back before he accused of their phrasing, “Less handsome than the shirt.”</p><p>“Oh,” Fae exaggerated. They bounced their index finger in his direction. “More handsome less the shirt.”</p><p>He laughed and shook his head, and was saved from responding when the server returned to take their orders. Once they’d gone he drank some of his beer and tapped the side of his glass with a nervous fingertip.</p><p>“Boarding school was fine. I had a therapist I hated, my grades were average, and a few casual friends that I would never get along with if I knew them now.” He explained, needlessly, “Just the friendship of being trapped with someone in the same place for months at a time.”</p><p>Fae nodded.</p><p>“Well, two years passed and then my father needed to move for business and I suppose some distances are unforgivable, because he moved me with him, and so I met Claude and Hilda, with an inflated ego and reactionary pride. It’s a marvel that either of them can stand me even now.”</p><p>Fae squinted skeptically. “You were a teenager.”</p><p>Lorenz relaxed.  “I suppose, and knowing them … did help me come out of my shell…” He closed his eyes for a long time, and when they opened they were glossy again. “That shell should have cracked sooner. It wasn’t until I tried to leave my father’s house to move in with Claude that it did. I wasn’t even going to forsake my education and his path for me up until that point, but the resulting argument was… It broke a lot of illusions I’d kept of my father, and made our every interaction afterwards another argument. He never treated me with respect, has never treated me with respect, or anyone, I suspect. Maybe my mother … but I don’t remember that.”</p><p>“What do you remember?” Fae prompted, sad and hopeful.</p><p>“Photographs,” Lorenz answered instantly. “She loved cameras, and even got to play with digital a little before…” He cleared his throat, and smiled. “She’d embarrass me by asking other parents about taking photos of their children. I don’t know if my father still has albums of me smiling with strangers somewhere, or if he would have thrown those out, but I don’t think we ever visited any kind of landmark without my mother having photos of at least a dozen people we didn’t know. We’d go through them, and she wouldn’t remember their names — sometimes couldn’t even speak their language, but she’d remember that they were smiling, and had been happy to share a moment with her — and those moments <b>were</b> <em>shared</em>, really. I rather suspect they’d remember her if I knew anyone to ask, about the eccentric woman with long black hair who asked to take their picture.”</p><p>Fae smiled. “She sounds fun.”</p><p>“She was.” He drank more. “They weren’t soulmates, but I think they were happy, maybe.”</p><p>“Nothing wrong with that,” Fae offered.</p><p>“No,” Lorenz pouted, agreeing. “There wouldn’t be if my father wasn’t so … morally bankrupt.” He looked from side to side absently, and Fae wondered what he was looking for before he worried, “I’ve been talking a lot, should I—?”</p><p>“Lorenz, you’re fine,” Fae promised. “I’m the one asking.”</p><p>He traced the pattern in the tablecloth absently, nodding. “There was a scandal, when I was eighteen. You might remember it.” Fae reached out to touch his hand again, and Lorenz winced about how messy and ugly and undignified he felt, but if they were his soulmate, then they would need to know all of him. Claude and Hilda were still by his side, he had to hope that they would be too.</p><p>“There wasn’t a law at the time, but I think people … myself included, would have assumed there were industry standards. But there was a leak, revealing that a number of people who had agreed to experimental drugs were given placebos, useless sugar pills, vitamins, to act as control groups for…” Lorenz trailed off, scratching a gentle thumbnail across the side of their fingers. “Anyway, they weren’t told, and they weren’t given an opportunity for alternate treatment — which is what the law calls for now. People are still being fed placebos, but … with the expectation that there is time for alternate treatment if their condition doesn’t improve.”</p><p>“On its own,” Fae said, grim.</p><p>“Exactly,” Lorenz agreed, sad. He raised his right hand so the side of his palm rested against his lips, and pressed the bones of his palm against his nose.</p><p>Lowering his hand to rub the back of his knuckles against his chin, Lorenz explained, “The victims of the scandal included our friend Raphael’s father and,” he winced, “and without getting much into it, his mother died that same year. It had to be when he was … nine, I think.”</p><p>Fae squinted. “Which would have made you…?”</p><p>“Ten? Maybe?” Lorenz answered, surprised.</p><p>They raised their free hand, palm up. “You can’t feel guilty about it.”</p><p>Lorenz brought the back of his hand back up to his mouth to hide a mirthless smile. “You underestimate me,” he teased.</p><p>He sighed and rolled his shoulders, continuing, “Each Ignatz and I thought Raphael would hate us, but Ignatz’s parents had only administered the drugs … and hadn’t known which patients were being treated, and which weren’t. And, as you point out, I was a child. Raphael … rightfully, hates my father and anyone associated with the decisions of the time, but he’s never been anything but a friend to Ignatz and I. And, more than a friend to his soulmate, I suspect.”</p><p>“I …” he hissed with sadness, “I tried to see the reasoning in the decision, at the level of those who made it. I would have been too … too polite, to say such a thing in the presence of my friends at the time. It wouldn’t be until I could reflect on this later to see why I couldn’t quite think as they did — they being my father and his board members, n-not Ignatz and the others.”</p><p>“And that’s the life your father wants for you?” Fae asked, and they were so kind about it, nothing like the impatience or frustration or horror Lorenz had been expecting. “To be part of decisions like these?”</p><p>He nodded, heavy shakes of his head that rattled him more than he meant to. He swept a hand through his hair. “And how could I live with that? How can they? Their whole model, everything, from the ground up, needs reworking. Even if they can blame every decision on one another, they just ... grow wealthy and obtuse. What could they want for the money when there are yet others in need?”</p><p>Stretching his hands out in front of himself, Lorenz worried, “And now I’m preaching.”</p><p>“To the choir,” Fae assured him. “It’s an appropriate subject to get worked up about, and it’s not just that it makes sense for it to be personal to you — it actually <em> is </em> personal to you. I understand.”</p><p>With a bashful smile, Lorenz relaxed. “Thank you.” He took a moment to drink as they did, trying to think how to segue out of the spotlight, satisfied that his tale was told, and they weren’t running or shouting indignantly about what he could do with what his father offered. “Did you and your father ever get to travel?”</p><p>“Nowhere fancy,” Fae giggled, relieved he was finding room to change the subject instead of them. “The landmarks we would have seen would have been unremarkable mountains and cliffsides, the largest taxidermied jackalope, supposedly. Real tacky shit.”</p><p>“What makes a mountain unremarkable?” Lorenz asked, teasing.</p><p>“How common the name is in the cultural sphere,” Fae answered. “You wouldn’t know where we were, and you wouldn’t know to go to a lot of the places I’d lived if it weren’t for pamphlets in gas stations, and websites not updated since the dawn of the computer. But they were all … graceful, in their own way, beautiful and cold.”</p><p>“Graceful?”</p><p>“I mean, looking down and imagining the cliff crumbling or climbing over years and centuries, bowing down or reaching out. I’m not a poet, but I think graceful’s fine.”</p><p>“That sounded like poetry,” Lorenz insisted.</p><p>“I think it sounded like my father,” Fae said with half a laugh. “He always walked a strange line between romantic and practical. I grew up with two radios in my backpack, and knew channels where I could reach him if I were close enough, or authorities if he went missing. Mountains are perilous, even with company and precautions.”</p><p>They fussed with a dangling jewel from their earring, a sparkling rain drop. “When I moved to the city my father was still working on this mountain that had a suspended cable car over a waterfall. It was full of ghost stories of women throwing themselves off the sides, for love or jealousy or rage. It was breathtaking, even in winter, but I worried about him… I felt guilty at the time, but he moved to keep me from worrying. From having to call every night. He works on a less perilous cliffside now. No waterfalls. About four hours away.”</p><p>“And that pays the bills?”</p><p>“As much as it needs to,” Fae agreed with a nod.</p><p>“Are—” Lorenz hesitated. “Are you as fond of his personality as you are of him? Do you feel … respected in his company?”</p><p>“He is my biggest supporter. When I was a kid I would have called him my best friend, but as I grew up I saw other teens who called their parents their best friend, and realized that my dad actually … fathered. Like he knew how to set boundaries and teach me things and be my dad.” They laughed awkwardly, “But you know, everything he taught me was lower-middle class bullshit, how to cook, change a tire, hunt, garden, approach or avoid cattle. How to find someone else to do your taxes.”</p><p>“All useful,” Lorenz agreed, shrugging. “I’m glad to hear it. I look forward to meeting him.”</p><p>Their orders were laid out on the table, and they nodded and whispered thank yous to the server as water was poured and phones and possessions reorganized. Lorenz moved back to sit next to Fae when he saw how they were trying to hold their chopsticks to pluck at the gyoza; not wrong exactly, but clumsy and inefficient.</p><p>As they ate, Fae showed Lorenz some photos their father had taken with his phone out in the wilderness, and some just in his garden, apparently having had a good cucumber crop this past August. They spoke of countrysides and music and travel, of good food, shared and secreted away, and portioned a chocolate cupcake between them with warm tea.</p><p>Lorenz checked the time, and Fae cleared their throat. “You don’t have to worry,” they offered. “We can just wait here until later, if you want.”</p><p>“I—? No,” Lorenz said, blushing. “I was just—”</p><p>“Sorry,” Fae apologized, laughing. “I thought … you might still feel delicate after our earlier conversation.”</p><p>“Would that spoil your mood if that were true?” Lorenz whispered.</p><p>“No,” they confirmed, shaking their head. They ate the last crumb of their dessert. “Ready to go then? See my apartment?”</p><p>“If only that,” Lorenz teased, leaning closer to bump against them, and Fae smiled in a way that promised far more.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I have like 7 different headcanons about why Countess Gloucester is never mentioned and what happened during Lorenz's time at Fhirdiad's School of Sorcery, like why he went and about him being pulled out just after Duscur... I just ... chose some to explore here.</p><p>Eat the rich! I was very worried about posting this during the current political climate, but one of my friends who was editing for me had time to read it and told me it was fine... It's fiction. It's fine. I hope I handled any subjects that may have affected anyone personally with respect. You have my sympathies and I am a willing ear if there are ways this could be improved.</p><p>I was originally going to write Lorenz and Fae's date and datenight as one chapter, but this, though not Too long, is longer than I was expecting, so now, we're looking forward to Claude and Hilda's date; and then either 1 chapter of smut exploring both of their nights, or 2 chapters of smut. Hope you're all on board.</p><p>ACAB. If you're protesting, do it safely. Covid-19 is still no joke.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0022"><h2>22. I Will Submit To The Mortifying Ordeal Of Being Known</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>trigger warnings for: referenced suicidal ideation</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Claude emerged from the bathroom with a bundle of clothes under one arm and the other stretched back behind himself, his face down and at an angle as if in thought, as he stretched his neck. He had clearly yet to finish whatever pep talk he was giving himself and Hilda diverted her eyes to her phone for a moment,l smiling because she could not imagine what about the pair of them would warrant assurance.</p><p>She’d been half sitting, half leaning on the front of her desk and moved to step in front of him as he made to pass into his office, only then looking up from her phone as she slid a hand from his chest to his neck. She stretched until her fingers found his at the top of his spine.</p><p>“Trying to out class me?” she accused.</p><p>Claude had changed into a deep brown dress shirt, patterned in bronze scales that shone when they caught the light but were lost in the darkness of the garment otherwise, and wine colored pants held in place by a black belt with a plain gold buckle. He still wore his same earring from earlier, but when he brought his hand in front of himself, holding Hilda’s, she could see that he also wore a beaded bracelet she had made, and a gold chain about his neck.</p><p>He laughed once, airy. “You set the standard,” he insisted, kissing her fingers. “I’m just trying not to embarrass you,” he sighed as he pressed past her, “and relieved you don’t think I look too tacky.”</p><p>Hilda smiled at Claude as he retreated to his office to drop his clothes in the chair across from his desk. They walked in step as they left, Hilda’s boots huge around her stockinged legs. She stamped a little at the entrance as Claude locked the door, a dance for the chill.</p><p>Claude giggled as he turned even before Hilda linked an arm with him, hurrying them along. “Come on!”</p><p> </p><p>They laughed the whole drive over, Claude’s car syncing to his phone and playing out a series of embarrassing pop songs. His first instinct had been to change the music, but Hilda’s annoyance was so overplayed that he gave her an off-key serenade instead; she didn’t bother pretending to not know the words of the second song.</p><p>Claude left the battery running so that the music continued to play as they relaxed, motionless on the street by their destination.</p><p>“Lorenz sings with you?” Hilda asked softly, leaning back into her seat.</p><p>Claude smiled bright and even adjusted his seat so he could lounge with her as he answered, “Absolutely. But you can’t bring up the sound of his voice or he’ll just … clam up, for like a week. Especially if it’s a compliment.”</p><p>“I can imagine,” Hilda agreed, amusement in her voice.</p><p>“And Fae?” Claude prompted.</p><p>“I don’t think either of us has heard the other sing,” Hilda said thoughtfully, a crease in her brow.</p><p>Claude frowned. “We’ve known them <em> a while. </em>”</p><p>“We have,” Hilda conceded, smiling skeptically.</p><p>“You’d think we’d know them better,” he observed.</p><p>“Mmm,” Hilda agreed. “If we were faster to open up, we might have discovered we were soulmates sooner.”</p><p>Claude swallowed. “I mean … it would have been nice to happen before it felt like Lorenz was threatening to break up with me,” Hilda pouted and Claude shrugged as she reached out to hold his hand, “but I think I’m happy it didn’t happen right away.”</p><p>“You had Lorenz,” Hilda criticized.</p><p>“You had me,” Claude offered. “And I don’t mean to just assume. Are you comfortable with what we are?” He rolled more to face her, extending his far hand to curl around her wrist. “With what we could be?”</p><p>Hilda smiled and nodded, and squeezed her hand in Claude’s as she felt his grip loosen so that he could stroke the crook of her thumb. She sighed, exaggerating, “How could I say no when you ask me like that?”</p><p>Claude leaned in to kiss her, long and slow, and then quick in parting as he pulled away to kill the car. With a wink, Claude exited the vehicle, and hurried around to meet Hilda on the sidewalk.</p><p> </p><p>A server waved at them to wait when they entered, to which Hilda smiled and nodded in answer, and Claude waved back. He almost lowered his arm around Hilda on instinct, but hesitated just for a moment, before following through, and pulling her close enough to kiss the side of her head.</p><p>“What was that?” Hilda asked, leaning her head away from him.</p><p>“Well…” Claude shrugged, bouncing her whole body, “Are things supposed to be different now?”</p><p>Hilda shook her head and opened her mouth to speak, but was interrupted by the server, who set them up at a table by the door and stayed in polite conversation while they ordered iced tea and whined about the weather.</p><p>“Spring feels so far away,” Hilda whined when the server left.</p><p>Claude snickered. “Remember when Leonie insisted we had to try ice skating at least once?”</p><p>Though she groaned, Hilda was smiling. “At least I was smart enough to stay by the wall of the rink. You must’ve been covered in bruises.”</p><p>“She said she had me,” Claude argued, gesturing with a hand. “And she did, kind of. Kept me from breaking my nose at least.”</p><p>“It’s funny that you’d bring that up.” Hilda paused, squinting at Claude. She blushed as she explained, “That was the first time Lorenz kissed me.”</p><p>“What?” he asked, incredulous, leaning forward so his hair swung from the movement. “I thought that was at Marianne’s birthday.” He laughed. “We all made such a big deal out of it.”</p><p>Hilda pressed a fingertip to her lips, eyes wide, as she shook her head. “No, it was after the skating. He walked me home.”</p><p>“He <em> did</em>,” Claude said, with a tone of recognition. “That’s so cute.”</p><p>“Is it weird?” Hilda asked, concerned. “Is it weirder now?”</p><p>“I mean,” Claude kept eye contact, but he fussed with the cutlery on the table nervously, “it’s not what people expect, but whether it’s weird depends on you, I think.”</p><p>Hilda frowned. “And not you?”</p><p>Claude laughed. “Oh, no, I’m definitely weird.”</p><p>“Claude,” Hilda chastised.</p><p>But the server had returned with their drinks and prolonged Hilda’s suffering. She ordered a smoked jackfruit platter, while Claude ordered a beef brisket sandwich.</p><p>“See even that,” Hilda insisted. “We’ve been here a dozen times. Why not order pulled pork? You hate it from almost everywhere else, from the quality of the meat to how much sauce they use…”</p><p>“Because we’re on a date,” Claude said, obviously a little surprised that he’d need to address this element, but Hilda was still confused and so he mumbled the rest. “I worried you wouldn’t kiss me.”</p><p>Hilda moved her hand to cover her mouth, in quiet shock at first, but then laughter overtook her, soft and hysterical. “You’re ridiculous.”</p><p>“Maybe,” Claude allowed, “but you never answered my question earlier. Hilda, if I’m weird, it’s because I’m nervous and excited. If my soulmate wasn’t going to be Lorenz, I’d wanted it to be you. And I want to tick those boxes for you,” his shoulder twitched, dismissive. “I want to do things you notice, and appreciate. We can still be friends — we can <em> just </em> be friends,” he amended, “if that’s more comfortable for you, but, I want things to be different besides sex. I want to be your partner.”</p><p>Her large pink eyes went from glassy to crying in a blink, and Claude was instantly standing. Hilda was curling further away from him as he walked around the table, one hand on her neck and the other on her forehead.</p><p>“Hey, hey,” Claude soothed, worried and awkward, as he took the empty seat next to her and carefully opened his posture so that she could lean into him if she wanted. “Shit. Don’t cry, sweetheart.”</p><p>“I’m sorry,” Hilda whimpered letting herself flop into the offered embrace.</p><p>“No, you’re okay,” Claude promised, wrapping his far arm around her stomach, and waiting, in suspense.</p><p>While catching her breath and her composure, Hilda asked, “Can you… Can you say it again? That you’re happy to be my soulmate? That you don’t want to leave me?”</p><p>Claude could’ve gone into shock, but still he squeezed Hilda closer and confessed, “I’m so happy. I’m so happy you’re my soulmate, Hilda.” He shut his eyes and shook his head running over the past few days in his mind, realizing she’d spent most of that time with Fae. “Did I <em> do</em> something…? Did Fae do something?”</p><p>“I mean… Fae … admitting that they’re ready to just fucking die—”</p><p>Claude tsked as he moved to correct her, “They didn’t say—”</p><p>But Hilda pressed on, “—and Lorenz having at least one secret conversation with his father.”</p><p>“Hilda,” Claude cautioned, begged.</p><p>“It just felt like they were trying to get away from us … from me. And I know,” she insisted, firm. “I know that’s wrong and that’s why I can’t— I wouldn’t say anything. I can’t make their pain about me.”</p><p>“Hilda,” Claude repeated, more bewildered than cautionary now, as she moved to sit straight and look him in the eye.</p><p>“But I wondered if I could talk to you about it,” she said, still frantic. “I figured you might understand…”</p><p>Claude loosed a heavy breath through his nose, appreciating that she had the decency to withhold the explanation that he would understand her predicament because of his own sometimes-obvious abandonment issues; feeling like an afterthought to his parents and a burden to his siblings, and more recently an obstacle to Lorenz, had festered over the years. He smiled weakly, leaning across the table to grab more napkins as Hilda pressed one across her face.</p><p>“Okay,” he cooed. “You’re okay.” He asked with less warmth, “<b>Are you</b> okay? Because I think you’re in need of some tough love.”</p><p>Hilda gaped at him, still recovering from breaking down in a public place. “Are you fucking serious?”</p><p>“Yeah,” Claude answered weakly, “yeah, I am.” He enumerated with his left hand, stretching his thumb and fingers back with his right index finger as he explained. “I do understand and I’m always here for you. Our partners were not trying to get away from you, and you were right not to voice your concerns while they were discussing their pain — if you need to talk to me about these things first, then that’s fine but — you have to talk to them about your concerns. You’re allowed to be hurt by the things people say and do, and you have to talk about them — that’s true of any partnership, romantic or otherwise. You can’t make your pain not their problem. We all have shit to work through, <em> and </em> we can work to better articulate our pain so that we’re not hurting each other. And I’m speaking for Fae and Lorenz, but I promise we’ll all feel better knowing you’re not just bottling the things we say. We love you, Hilda. <b>I</b> love you.” She was smiling again, nodding in agreement and understanding, so Claude leaned towards her, to kiss her forehead, and stroke a hand across her face, his thumb through her bangs. “Do you want to get our food to go?”</p><p>Hilda huffed out a soft laugh, running her fingers under her eyes as she asked, “Am I that much of a mess?”</p><p>With a shake of his head, Claude caught her chin with the crook of his index finger and tilted her towards him as he pecked her lips. “You look beautiful,” he promised, and kissed her forehead once more before he moved to stand. “It’ll be our secret.”</p><p> </p><p>Hilda still retreated to the washroom to reset any relevant makeup, and to pout about how right Claude had been. She supposed he did have a few more years on her in figuring out what a real long term romantic relationship looked like, but she hadn’t expected anything more than Claude promising her that the others would be fine and that she should get over it. Being faced with the responsibility of her own feelings instead… <em> ‘Tough love, indeed.’</em></p><p>“So when’s the last time you went out dancing?” Hilda asked as she returned to the table.</p><p>“Uhhhh,” Claude blew air out of his sealed lips, bubbling the noise. “You would know that better than I would.”</p><p>Hilda snorted in amusement as she leaned forward on her elbows, “So like four years.”</p><p>“You were always doing it to find your soulmate,” Claude said to explain why he wouldn’t have gone with her. “And Lorenz and I don’t usually do ‘active’ dates.”</p><p>“We should go though, the four of us,” Hilda suggested, crossing her hands and holding her upper arms. “For new year’s maybe — or before, if that crowd would be too much for Fae or Lorenz.”</p><p>“Could be fun,” Claude said, joy and skepticism warring in his voice.</p><p>“I’ll talk to them first,” Hilda said, rolling her eyes. “Well before.”</p><p>“Good,” Claude agreed, before greeting the server returning with their food. He was all smiles with the stranger, and Hilda tilted her head to wink at them as they left.</p><p>They enjoyed a few bites, when Claude’s phone buzzed on the table.</p><p>“Everything alright?” Hilda asked as Claude pouted at the message.</p><p><b>Lorenz (7:12 PM):</b> at restaurant with Fae. Hugged. Missed the soulmate connection even more without you</p><p>“Yeah,” he answered, using a napkin on his mouth as he moved to sit next to Hilda again, showing her the text. It took no convincing to take a selfie of a shared kiss, and he confirmed the message with her before sending off his reply.</p><p><b>Claude (7:16 PM):</b> Thank you for letting me know you’re safe. Now put your phone away and focus on your date or I’ll elope with Hilda. We’re already kissing.</p><p><b>Claude (7:16 PM):</b> <em>[Claude and Hilda sharing a simple peck in front of a dark blue wall under amber lighting]</em></p><p>“I’m surprised you wouldn’t be wanting them to check in at every update,” Hilda taunted.</p><p>“I can be patient,” Claude argued.</p><p>“Clearly.” Hilda giggled as he took another bite of his sandwich. She gestured to it. “Worth it?”</p><p>Claude could feel his face heat up as Hilda watched him chew and swallow, turning his head to try and not be undignified about it. He winked as he straightened in his seat. “For you, Hilda, I would forgo all my favorites meals,” he laughed, “but thankfully, we share some.”</p><p>“We share a lot,” Hilda observed, obviously referring to more than just their taste in food.</p><p>“Too much?” asked Claude, not accusatory, just curious.</p><p>“I wonder sometimes,” Hilda said, unsure if she was teasing. “When will you get tired of me?”</p><p>Claude frowned while Hilda ate some of her dinner, waiting to have her attention. “You know, with Lorenz looking to help people, I do wonder about us. I wanted to help people too.”</p><p>“You do,” Hilda insisted.</p><p>“The elite,” Claude agreed, as if a dismissal. “We’re a luxury service. Is that really better than what we were avoiding?” Hilda looked nervous and Claude tried to smile to assure her. “And you’re too smart to stay an administrative assistant forever. Overqualified and, now, full of experience.”</p><p>“You’re not getting rid of me that easily,” Hilda said, tilting her head into a long sip of her iced tea.</p><p>“I’m not trying to,” Claude promised, “but maybe … start thinking about what you could be doing, and where, if we’re moving anyway. I won’t be looking for a change in career until Lorenz is settled at least, maybe not until I’m sure what Fae’s doing, so you don’t have to worry about me putting you out of work … but I’d write you any glowing reference you’d need.”</p><p>He played with his cutlery. “Or maybe I just need you to convince me.” Hilda rolled her eyes and Claude smiled a little brighter. “If you really think our work is significant… Worthwhile.”</p><p>“Well,” Hilda sighed. “I’d miss you, but maybe there’s something to be said for working somewhere with vacation days.”</p><p>Claude reached out across the table, and Hilda could feel his heartbeat in his palm, more worked up than his demeanor was telling. “I’d come home to you every night, Hilda.”</p><p>Hilda snapped her hand away, chiding. “Finish your fucking supper. You big sap.”</p><p>She was smiling, and her posture was relaxed, and so Claude was too. Relieved and hopeful, he nodded in acknowledgement, and stole glances of her between mouthfuls.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I wish so badly I could have had someone read this chapter before I posted it... I hope the references I've made this chapter (and have been making this whole fic) for dietary restrictions for Hilda (and other characters) have made sense and been respectful.</p><p>I was also concerned about giving Hilda tough love, when she's the only woman in the ot4 and I don't want to give her a hard time, specifically. I hope that previous and upcoming moments where people have been more tender with her balance it out, and I hope that it's obvious that I'm trying to portray an overall healthy relationship between all members, where any of them are in a position to be called out by the others...</p><p>Anyway! Hopefully this was still, you know, nice.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0023"><h2>23. But Love Isn't A Reward (Fae x Lorenz)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Lorenz frowned when he realized Fae’s apartment was on a ground floor, the meager fencing around a glass door and nearby window feeling uncomfortably insecure. He was relieved he wasn’t compelled to comment upon it at least, not drunk enough after only one glass of beer for that, and swallowed his concerns of his partner’s security as they led him through the front door, to access their unit properly from a warm hallway.</p><p>“Home sweet home,” Fae offered.</p><p>“Did you paint the walls?” Lorenz asked, because the first thing to strike him about the apartment was the color.</p><p>“I had help,” Fae allowed. “It took two years to work up the nerve to do it, but they were going to have to repaint it anyway after I left.” They shrugged.</p><p>As they took his coat they gestured around themselves. “Living room,” and pointed to Lorenz’s left, to what he thought might be a closet, “bathroom,” and walked straight away from him to gesture to the grey cabinets and appliances behind the sofa, “kitchen,” and to their opposite side, “bedroom.”</p><p>The walls perpendicular to the entrance were painted dark copper, while those parallel to the entrance were red, painted in such a way to exaggerate the space of the apartment. Navy blue lampshades with pale yellow stitching decorated two lamps, and besides the beige rug by the door for their boots, there were two giraffe patterned carpets visible on the floor, one in front of a brown sofa facing them and, if Lorenz turned to his right, a television, the other marking the divide of bedroom and kitchen, supposedly. Each corner and ledge, regardless of size, seemed decorated in greenery; plants rested happily in a variety of pots, some painted, some plain, obvious against the dark walls and navy curtains which clearly hid the glass door to the outside.</p><p>With the exception of the bathroom, it was all one room, really, but Fae still managed to walk out of his line of vision to the bedroom; hanging their coats in the closet that backed onto the bathroom.</p><p>“Do you want music? Something to drink?”</p><p>They looked confused when they saw him again because Lorenz was smiling. He teased, “You’d offer me music before a drink?”</p><p>“It was in the same breath,” Fae argued, walking up to him, taking each of his hands in theirs as they leaned away, as if to pull him into the apartment. “Come now. What do you want?”</p><p>Lorenz couldn’t help to wonder if he or Claude more resembled their apartment, because Fae looked at home. A patterned sweater hung off their shoulders and swayed behind them, as if leading them both. It was decorated in moons and flowers — <em>‘And llamas? No, those are roosters…’</em> — in muted shades of blue, turquoise and maroon. They wore a navy blue shirt that looked itchy, if Lorenz had to guess, velvet-like in material, and high-waisted teal shorts over black pantyhose that had hearts patterned on them. A belt looped through the shorts, which he hadn’t really been able to see before, had yellow suns painted on brown leather.</p><p>“Um,” Lorenz hesitated, allowing himself to be pulled two steps, “water, I suppose? And something quiet?”</p><p>“Just background noise,” Fae confirmed, leading Lorenz to a dark grey table behind the sofa, where he sat at one of two folding chairs. They turned on some lights and poured them each a glass of water, before setting up an electronic-orchestral playlist on the speakers under the television.</p><p>“There,” Fae declared as they returned to sit across from Lorenz. “Now maybe the silence won’t stifle us.”</p><p>Swallowing some of his water, Lorenz raised his eyebrows in agreement.</p><p>“It’s strange,” Lorenz said quietly.</p><p>“What is?” Fae asked, encouragingly.</p><p>He blushed and clenched his glass. “I can’t even imagine, getting change at a grocery store and finding your soulmate, or even going to a gathering where you’re meant to be looking for them?” He rubbed the back of a wrist absently. “I have the benefit of knowing you so much better than I could… And still, I feel nervous.”</p><p>Fae smiled, relieved. “I’m sure we’ll find some way to relax you.”</p><p>They stole his glass of water as they stood, and blew him a kiss as they moved to place both glasses on the bedside table. Balancing a lack of subtlety with a measure of grace, Fae dropped themselves onto their plush brown comforter and crossed their hands between their knees.</p><p>Lorenz chuckled as he chased after them, sitting on their right, closer to the base of the bed. He rolled his thumbs over their cheekbones, guiding their smiling face to his own as Fae stretched back, craning to kiss him. Shifting his hips closer to the edge of the bed, Lorenz leaned forward to exaggerate the angle, forcing Fae to extend their hands behind themselves to support their weight on their wrists.</p><p>Fae gasped when Lorenz let his ring finger dip across their ear in a caress, which Lorenz answered with a soft noise deep in his throat. They giggled between two soft presses of his lips as he snaked his left arm around their waist and brought his right hand to their shoulder, curling closer and pressing his forehead to theirs.</p><p>Leaning into Lorenz, Fae turned on their side, their left hand curling around his thigh. Lorenz wondered whether Claude or Hilda had suggested something about music, or if it was a coincidental distraction, to keep him from fretting too much about the sounds of their kisses as they continued their silent conversation.</p><p>Fae arched their chest into his touch as his hand fell from their shoulder to their breast, groping and massaging them. Curving his palm back and forth across the swell of their breast until he could feel their nipple through the layers of their clothing, Lorenz rolled his hand to where he could pulse the crook of his thumb around it.</p><p>Pulling away, Fae shook their head so that their nose tickled across Lorenz’s cheek. “Feeling more confident than you were letting on?”</p><p>Lorenz meant to reply, but only breathed out a short, surprised moan as their hand slid from his thigh to his cock. He startled, eyes blinking open as Fae moved to straddle him where he was still seated upright. Their hands clung to his back and his neck as he let his own slide across their body from the motion. Finding the back of their sweater, Lorenz tugged gently so that it fell further back off their shoulders as Fae shifted forward, pressing them closer together.</p><p>“Muh-maybe,” he stuttered, his gaze full of adoration.</p><p>With a hum of approval, Fae leaned up on their knees and cradled Lorenz’s head to their chest.</p><p>“Hold me.”</p><p>And he did, while Fae rolled their shoulders and stretched out of their sweater. With another kiss, his hands slipped up the back of their shirt, and though it hadn’t quite been Lorenz’s immediate goal, Fae pulled themselves out of that next as it hitched over Lorenz’s wrists. He traced his tongue up the side of their breast regardless as they settled back down against him, his pelvis swaying up to chase any pressure in his lap as they kissed again.</p><p>Soon, Lorenz found himself on his back, hands around Fae’s ass, their thighs spreading farther apart as they laid upon him and bit his tongue. Slowly Fae slid down across him, and he worried about their knees crashing to the floor, but they simply stood up, legs still around his knees. They unclasped the belt at their waist as they asked, “Do you want me to undress you?” They smiled as Lorenz flushed and moved to sit up with his weight on his forearms. “Or would you take your shirts off for me?”</p><p>Lorenz felt far less nervous than earlier. He nodded as he whimpered, “Yes,” and sat up as he raced through the buttons.</p><p>Fae tossed their belt aside, and stepped away to pull themselves out of their shorts. They were surprised they didn’t feel more foolish in what they wore, but Lorenz’s interest was too transparent to dissuade them from leaning back towards him, and reaching out to slide their hands over his undershirt, and then over his chest as he managed to undress.</p><p>“Just—” Lorenz started to ask. “May I?”</p><p>He directed Fae away from him again, and also fussed with his belt, unbuckling the thing and unfastening his pants, but not removing them as he leaned back as if to offer them space to approach.</p><p>Fae snorted in amusement, clenching their hands in the material on the outside of his thighs. “<em>May I? </em>” they repeated.</p><p>“Sorry,” Lorenz laughed softly. “Yes, of course.”</p><p>Fae licked their lips about the way Lorenz rolled his body skyward to help free his clothing, and pouted sympathetically about how bashful he looked when he realized that they weren’t going to simply let his pants fall to the floor. They stepped farther back so that his legs were forced to straighten up until they had pulled the garment off his ankles, too amused with his disorientation to stop.</p><p>“You’re so pretty,” Fae promised, laughing with Lorenz, though his laughter started off as incredulous, and he shook his head as he shuffled his toes against his heels to remove his socks.</p><p>He pressed his left hand down his thigh while wrapping his right arm around himself, as if that might do anything to hide him. “I must look ridiculous.”</p><p>“Mm-mm,” Fae disagreed, crawling on the bed by his side. They thought of reaching for the bulge in his boxer briefs, but didn’t want to color their compliment, and so only dropped their hand on his stomach, slowly caressing up over his chest as they leaned in to kiss him. They hummed in contentment as his hands found them again, and lay down diagonally across him, into his embrace as his hands sought the clasps on their bra.</p><p>Fae trailed their hand down across his body again, this time making a show of fondling him as they purred, “Very handsome. Every inch of you.”</p><p>Lorenz gripped at their upper arms through their kisses, and hissed in wonder as they leaned away and out of their bra, caught on his curled fingers, “My soulmate…”</p><p>They rolled around, kissing necks and nipples, fingertips and soulmarks, moving to find a more secure place lying long-ways on the bed. “Beautiful,” he whispered between kisses, because it was true. “And patient,” and this compliment stemmed from their temperament tonight. “And thoughtful,” but he could think of being enamored with them sooner, as they cared for Hilda and were kind to Claude. “And still you’re … you…” he hesitated, grateful for how they were looking at him, and touching him, and —</p><p>“I love you, Lorenz,” Fae said softly, now laid on their side facing him, their legs intertwined with his, a hand on his hip and the side of his ass to help them find each other as they humped against one another.</p><p>“I love you too,” Lorenz sighed, the glide of their stockings smooth against his skin, the slide of their chest warm against his heart. “Would you—? Would you consider turning around?”</p><p>“Finish undressing first?” Fae bargained, and they smiled when Lorenz nodded.</p><p>“Yes,” he agreed. They rolled apart, and each hooked thumbs along their own waistbands, until Lorenz peeped, “Oh, wait.”</p><p>“Oh,” Fae answered in understanding, moving first to wrap their arms around their middle, and then repositioning to curl their hands around Lorenz’s arm as they asked, “Just you?”</p><p>“Just me,” Lorenz echoed, smiling and blushing. “Just for … a minute? Less?”</p><p>“I won’t time you,” Fae teased, kissing his shoulder.</p><p>Lorenz huffed a laugh and nodded again. He allowed himself one more breath before bending his knees up as he pulled himself out of the last of his clothing, missing the buffer and assurance of his usual lover. Although to suggest Fae looked judgmental or disinterested would also have injured Lorenz; they were courteous and infatuated enough that their excitement was gentle as they reached out to wrap a hand, first around his own, and then around his cock, their other hand flexing along his chest as they shared more kisses.</p><p>Fae waited until a helpless whimper escaped Lorenz, wanting that auditory assurance of his pleasure before releasing him. They rolled onto their side, reaching out to the bedside table for water. Lorenz let himself whine as he rolled after them, pulling their hips closer to him for half a moment before Fae offered him the glass, from which he accepted a swallow.</p><p>Replacing the glass on the table, Fae chuckled about their hair being swept forward over their shoulders, exposing their back to Lorenz’s skin and touch as he crowded around them, pulling them back into his arms so that they were half on their backs and their sides as he ground his cock against the side of their ass and smooth, rippling surface of their stockings.</p><p>They both adjusted to slide him between their thighs, Fae curling a hand in the front of the garment to pull it up so that he could bump more securely between their legs, up against their clothed cunt.</p><p>“I have to be careful with that seam,” Lorenz whispered, soft and amused. He took Fae’s right thigh in hand, hitching and spreading their legs, slow and careful, concerned about the tension on the sheer garment.</p><p>“Was it uncomfortable?” Fae asked, reaching down to angle his cock against them, squishing the head of his cock between their palm and their pussy through three more of Lorenz’s tender movements.</p><p>“It— A little, but <b><em>this…</em> </b>” Lorenz whined, allowing himself to jitter.</p><p>“Mmmm,” Fae purred, agreeing. “This feels good?”</p><p>“Oh yes,” Lorenz breathed on the side of their head, rolling his hips a few more times.</p><p>“For me too,” they promised, pressing their ass back against his pelvis and rolling their palm in circles on his dick.</p><p>They repeated the motions a little longer, until Lorenz gasped in warning. Fae cooed as they released him, and Lorenz let go of their thigh as they pulled away enough to roll around and face him, hands on his chest, their chin on their hands. They pressed down to propel themselves close enough to kiss him, and Lorenz was flush and smiling, stroking his thumbs over their shoulders.</p><p>Fae adjusted their hair as they sat up, working their lower layers down their legs and to the floor as Lorenz sat up behind them. He rubbed his fingertips along the base of their stomach, the top of their mound, until they were finished. Then, kicking their calves up to either side of themselves, Fae stretched up on their knees to grant Lorenz’s hand room between their thighs to pet over their soft lips.</p><p>“Oh,” Lorenz whimpered, using his free hand to help pet their hair over one shoulder as they tilted their neck towards his mouth. “You <em> really </em> enjoyed that,” he observed, surprised by the smooth, sleek slide of his fingers. He held them both secure with an arm across their chest, holding a breast.</p><p>“Are you fucking serious?” Fae half laughed, and Lorenz hummed behind their ear, curling his hand around their pussy with firm, prodding, pressure. They each knew he’d been far more undone by it, and there was no need to focus on it further.</p><p>Fae slid their hands down Lorenz’s forearm, finding the back of his palm and rocking up into it a few times before taking their right hand in search of his left to tangle their fingers together. When he bit their ear, Fae started to force them to dislodge, and Lorenz found that he wasn’t distressed. Patiently, he watched as they retrieved a condom from a drawer on the bedside table.</p><p>As Fae approached him again, Lorenz reached out as if to accept the condom from them, but they snapped that arm away and instead guided him to lay back again. Straddling his thighs, Fae leaned forward to dress him in the condom, and Lorenz reached out to caress their hair back, groaning, toes curled, as they delayed them longer by sucking him into their mouth a few times.</p><p>Crawling over Lorenz, Fae leaned on one hand beside his shoulder, while extending their left down beneath themselves to guide them together. They admired his strained expression, and though they sighed too, they basked in the kiss of his breath across their skin and the security of his hands on their hips.</p><p>They kissed as Fae adjusted their knees and rocked themselves back and forth a little while, gasping as they sat up, and moaning with Lorenz as they let gravity force their connection.</p><p>“Rest your hand on mine?” Lorenz asked, and Fae knew which hand he meant without asking.</p><p>With their left hand, they balanced themselves on their knee, as they curled their right hand over Lorenz’s left, rested on their thigh, so that he could see their muted soulmark. Fae rolled their hips back and forth at first, and then fell forward enough to rest their hand on the bed by Lorenz’s side, so that they could fuck themselves along him in a way that took more advantage of the length of him, trying to figure out what he liked more.</p><p>The change in position had Lorenz feeling more secure about his own movement and tried to match Fae in theirs, but there was something about their expression and their breathing that told Lorenz they were exerted, and not overcome by passion. He pulled their right hand aside in his own, releasing it to run his grip up their wrist.</p><p>“Fae,” he called, soft and amused. “Sit back up.”</p><p>They giggled. “Okay…”</p><p>Lorenz laid a hand on their chest as they did so, initially to help them balance, but then Fae was nodding and he was more playful about the touch, gripping their breast, pinching a nipple between the knuckles of his fingers. Fae rocked themselves to and fro, able to squeeze around Lorenz depending on the curve of their back, and it was obvious they both enjoyed that. Whimpering as Fae moved faster, Lorenz dropped his hand so that their thighs were in his grip, granting him purchase to rut up inside them. Fae slowed to nearly stationary to let this build, slipping their hand between their legs to tap their middle finger above their clit as they moaned in ecstasy.</p><p>“Fuh-ah, nah, fuhhhha… <em>Fuck. </em>” Lorenz hissed. “Are you—?” Fae didn’t answer him, leaving Lorenz to whine as they jittered in his lap, pulsed around his cock. When they stilled, Lorenz pouted. “That’s — <em>Oh-o … ohm… </em>Mmm.”</p><p>After a long purring noise Fae squeezed their thighs around Lorenz’s hips. “You’re well disciplined,” they teased, resting their hands on his stomach, petting their thumbs down his pelvis.</p><p>Lorenz leaned his waist up into their touch and their cunt, shivering as he laid back down. “I try.”</p><p>Fae licked their lips. “Alright, let’s bend your legs up.”</p><p>“I—? Um?” Lorenz snuffled as Fae moved to sit between his legs, his hands sliding away to the top of his thighs where they twitched as Fae grabbed his cock with both hands.</p><p>“I’ll still ride you,” Fae offered in assurance. Lorenz raised one hand to hold his stomach, now struck with concern about the way his body bounced with each harsh breath. He swept at his hair with his other hand, and felt Fae lower their hands to his pelvis, holding him erect in the curve of their thumbs and forefingers. “Unless you really don’t want to?”</p><p>Lorenz moved his hand from his hair to his chest, feeling his heart tighten. “Would it be selfish to ask that we turn off the lights?”</p><p>“Lorenz,” Fae whined, wishing he’d asked sooner. “Of course not.” They grabbed their sweater and stood, and skipped around to accommodate the request. “Is there anything else you’d like?”</p><p>Unbidden, thoughts of their first night together came to mind, laying in bed with Claude and Hilda also, feeling the activation of his soumark, seeing the proof of theirs, and Fae too.</p><p>“Not right now,” he promised, accepting a kiss, hitching his knees up and apart as Fae sat on the side of the bed and reached out to fondle his balls.</p><p>“Don’t let me make you uncomfortable,” Fae pleaded as they pulled away to remove their sweater.</p><p>“I won’t. You wouldn’t,” Lorenz insisted, as Fae moved to sit between his legs, one hand on his cock and the other on his knee.</p><p>“Alright,” they agreed, smiling as they stroked him a little, first with their whole hand and then just their thumb, index and middle fingers around the head of his cock, and then the whole of his length again with both hands, confirming his arousal. “Then hug your knees.”</p><p>Fae moved their hands to the back of Lorenz’s ass and thighs as he moved to accommodate them, helping him into position, and attempting to soothe. Soon, they were reaching out with their left hand to hold his right leg back, as each they and Lorenz’s right hands tipped and tugged his cock towards Fae. They straddled the backs of his thighs as they filled themselves with him.</p><p>“Oh, but I can’t…” Lorenz observed, whining, realizing that like this, he couldn’t thrust or contribute.</p><p>“Mmmm,” Fae agreed, shifting back and forth. Lorenz’s voice warbled out of him. “You just have to lie there.”</p><p>The position was not altogether unfamiliar to Lorenz, but it still felt different to be fucked like this, wholly out of his control, with a new partner, who smiled between strained expressions and was utterly enamored with him. Pressing his cock towards them as they thrust and bounced, Lorenz pressed his lips together, tortured by slick, sweet pressure and intentionally choppy movements that forced him down into the bed so that the springs helped lift him back to his lover. When realization struck that the muscles they had built up for this purpose had likely been honed topping Hilda these past few weeks, Lorenz pressed his heels to either side of Fae’s ribs, wanting to be so much closer than connected.</p><p>“That good?” Fae taunted, slowing to fluid, rhythmic sways of their hips.</p><p>“Yeh…” Lorenz whispered. “<em>Yes.</em>”</p><p>Fae shifted farther away from Lorenz, squatting at first, but then leaning forward on one knee as they thrust towards him, and then up and down so that his moans cut off into rushes of air, deep and desperate exhales, made worse when Fae started grunting on the end of each motion. He could feel himself twitching inside of them, as they slowed between every other thrust for their body to shake and shudder around him. Sliding his hand from behind his knee to the base of his foot, Lorenz worried that Fae might stop either for pleasure or exhaustion, and he was so close now to the peak of his pleasure that he felt choked by it.</p><p>“<b>More,</b>” he whimpered. “<em>Please, </em>more. I—”</p><p>“Oh, <em> yes, </em> Lorenz,” Fae cooed, moving themselves more heavily against him. They gasped, and their body stuttered, nearly stopping from surprise at the sensation of his orgasm, quickly moving again as they moaned and indulged in his pleasure. His breath squeaked out of him in short bursts, as Fae groaned empty affirmations, and stilled their body when they felt him go pliant and rubbery beneath them.</p><p>“Fuck, you’re hot,” Fae said, giggling a little when Lorenz released his foot to hold the back of their ass, keeping them close. They shifted his leg back and tilted their head to kiss his achilles tendon twice. “And so delicate. Was that all okay?”</p><p>“I…” Lorenz tossed his head back into the pillows for a moment, emphasizing his pleasure, matching Fae’s smile when he looked back to them. “This has been a dream. Thank you.”</p><p>Lorenz whimpered as Fae helped them disconnect in a way that didn’t lose the condom, and yelped in surprise when they bat at the back of his calves, not really hitting him as they scolded, “Don’t thank me, Lorenz.”</p><p>Letting his legs settle back down around them, Lorenz rolled his eyes. “It was good,” he confessed instead.</p><p>“Good,” Fae agreed, leaning forward to kiss him. Nuzzling their forehead to his, they requested, “You want to throw out the condom and wash your hands? … I’d like more too, if you don’t think it’s too late?”</p><p>“Do not check what time it is,” Lorenz insisted, kissing them again as he moved to sit on the edge of the bed to remove the condom. “Of course,” he promised, following their pointed arm to find a waste bin on the floor to drop it in. He fished around in the clothes on the floor to retrieve his boxer briefs, and leaned over to kiss Fae’s shoulder when he sat up before he stood. “I’ll be quick.”</p><p>He fumbled for the light switch, both to turn it on, and then off as he returned to his soulmate, now under their comforter.</p><p>“Please don’t fall asleep,” Lorenz begged, wrapping his arms around them, but then Fae pushed him back to straddle his thigh, soft and wet; and he had to imagine that they were too distracted for that to be a real possibility.</p><p>“Don’t worry,” Fae said, kissing him and shifting to rub three of their fingers against their mound.</p><p>Lorenz forced them to roll onto their back, shifting his own legs aside so that he could caress their body as he crouched over them under the covers, kissing their happy mouth. They squeezed their thighs together around his hand, and at first Lorenz thought Fae might be instigating a game or a challenge, but it only took a little more guidance for him to realize it was a direction, and by holding his hand in place where they wanted him that they were taking pleasure from the soft and solid force of his fingers as they rut into his touch.</p><p>Slowly, he started to rub circles, answering the grinding of their pussy against his fingers with dips of his digits that threatened to penetrate them, but never quite did. Lorenz sat up enough so that the blanket slipped away and Fae reached out to tug it around him, pulling him closer with the sheets. With a whine, they let their legs slip apart, and Lorenz rolled the heel of one palm over their mound as he pinched at their lips with his opposite hand.</p><p>Moaning, Fae hitched their knees and adjusted their breasts as Lorenz cursed softly and returned to his previous efforts, freeing one hand to pinch and play at their nipples; and Fae had no doubt that he would be as present for them as they had been for him.</p><p>Extracting his right hand for all of a moment, Lorenz made eye contact with Fae, and sought any kind of objection as he repositioned, and sucked on their breast, first atop it, then their nipple, then below. Their left hand found the back of his head, and Lorenz hummed appreciatively as he let his middle finger rub circles on their entrance until it slipped inside of them, and then he returned to his more purposeful petting as Fae groaned overhead, out of sight.</p><p>Lorenz wondered whether this orgasm would have felt different on his cock than their last, as their moaning was soon accompanied by a vice like grip around his finger. Carefully, he pulled his hand away as he lapped once more on the sensitive skin around their nipple as he looked to them for confirmation. Even then, Lorenz had to roll his hands around their thighs as he leaned up to find their expression, back arched as they were.</p><p>With a sigh of relief and a shared smile, Lorenz moved his hands up to wrap around their lower back instead, burying his face in Fae’s neck as they curled their legs around his middle, cradling him close to them as their limbs continued to twitch comfortably.</p><p>“I love you,” Fae whispered.</p><p>“I love you too,” Lorenz promised, wiggling a little. “I’m not crushing you, am I?”</p><p>“No,” Fae hummed, amused. “Thank you.”</p><p>Lorenz nuzzled into them, kissing their jawbone afterwards, along to their chin. “My pleasure.” He kissed their mouth next, plucking at their lips with his own. “Would you want to see me again if I weren’t your soulmate?”</p><p>“You are my soulmate,” Fae insisted, and Lorenz felt his heart tighten, a mimicry of the connection he missed. He adjusted his arms, needlessly, and Fae squeezed him tighter also.</p><p>“Do you think it’s too late to hope to hold the other two?” Lorenz asked, half serious. “I’d like for us all to sit together, for a little while…”</p><p>“Me too,” Fae chuckled, letting their limbs go slack. “I’m sure they’re up, and if we all regret staying up late on a work night, we’ll know to better schedule these outings. Let me up.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I hope so deeply this was worth the wait, fun, matched the tone of other chapters, and not too repetitive.</p><p>I'm sorry that I'm so inconsistent about when to express italicized thoughts in this fic. It was a new thing for me, and I still lean towards including thoughts in flavor text, and having characters (eventually?) say / act on things, rather than explore inner dialogue. I'll try to be better about it.</p><p>Also, I'm sorry if the stocking stuff was weird? Undressing characters for the purpose of smut is weird. Also dressing characters is weird (and sometimes FUN and sometimes not). And that reminds me! <a href="https://www.pinterest.ca/omgFaedolyn/writing-outfits-inspo/">Here is a pintrest board</a> with a bunch of outfit inspiration for this fic (and a top down view of Fae's apartment which is the first building I've ever referenced that wasn't based on a real place that I've been to (but I did almost rent an apartment on a ground floor with a questionable glass door once)) and for my fic <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/21423745">Just Go With It</a> at least, and probably future fics, if anyone was curious.</p><p>Love you guys. Stay safe. I'd love a kudos or comment, especially if you're a guest.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0024"><h2>24. It's An Experience (Claude x Hilda)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Hilda and Claude arrived at his apartment, he took a minute to scurry around; lighting a candle in the bedroom, starting tea in the kitchen, and giving Hilda an extra two pillows where she lounged in the living room. She grimaced, sympathetic and judgmental, and he could only shrug in response, settling down into the opposite corner of the couch.</p><p>“You don’t need to worry so much,” Hilda assured him, stuffing the pillows against the arm of the couch before dropping herself into them, but Claude wouldn’t stop smiling and so her words felt hollow. She rolled her eyes as she swung her legs up into the space between them.</p><p>Claude bent his feet under himself as he turned towards her. “I’m not <em>worried</em>,” he insisted, reaching out to take her left ankle between his hands. Hilda looked incredulous, so as he massaged his thumbs up the sides of her calve, Claude added, “I’m just … feeling your eyes on me.”</p><p>Wiggling her feet back and forth, Hilda laughed. “Does one of us need a blindfold?”</p><p>Claude laughed too, a puff of air. He shook his head before daring to look Hilda in the eyes again. “Maybe next time.”</p><p>With her hands on her thighs, Hilda tapped her index fingers back and forth as she stretched into Claude’s massage. He smiled, slowly, looking like he was lost, or on the verge of saying something, but Hilda didn’t want to rush him, so they sat in silence as he averted his gaze to her knees again and waited for the kettle to pop.</p><p>Hilda pulled one of the pillows out from behind herself to embrace while Claude stood and went to make tea. The silence, and the tinkling of metal on ceramic, were loud in the apartment, as loud as Claude’s heart had felt in the dead silence of the power outage a few days ago, in his bedroom. He smiled to Hilda as he returned, asking her as he handed her a mug, “Do you want to—?”</p><p>“Yes,” she said instantly, pointed. She smiled wider as Claude did.</p><p>He let himself sink back into the couch. “You don’t even know what I was asking.”</p><p>“Don’t need to,” Hilda teased, licking pine and lemon off her lips.</p><p>“I could’ve been asking that we wait,” Claude proposed, taunting.</p><p>“Then we’d wait,” Hilda said, warm and sweet. She paused, crossing her ankles and watching Claude as he let the front of his argument melt away with a sigh. His shoulders were slumped as he sipped his tea, and Hilda thought of him saying he hadn’t wanted to be a disappointment that first night, and of him saying he’d wanted her to be his soulmate. He made her wonder about this past Sunday, texting and talking, and she asked, “Did you or Lorenz suggest you go out with me first?”</p><p>Claude was blowing on his tea, more absently than purposefully, but he blushed and left it on the table, swiping his thumb and forefinger over his upper lip, his knuckle below his lower one, before he answered. “No, uh, I asked.”</p><p>“Oh?” Hilda peeped, sitting up, leaning to put down her mug also, tossing the pillow she’d cradled to the chair by the window. She bent one leg and then the other beneath herself, kneeling, expectant.</p><p>“I thought,” Claude hesitated, shifting closer, leaning on the back of the couch. “I thought it would be easier … for me.” He huffed, squinting, disappointed with himself. “Selfish.”</p><p>“Claude,” Hilda called, reaching out to place her left hand on his chest, and sought his left hand with her right. She watched his fingers tangle with hers, in five different ways — at first because the fit wasn’t right, and then just in play — and then sought his gaze again, hooking her middle finger on the second button on his shirt, the highest that was bound.</p><p>He leaned closer to her, parting his lips to answer, but Hilda curled her fingers, stealing his attention. The fabric of his shirt rustled, and Claude squeezed back the hand he was holding on instinct.</p><p>“I want to make this easy for you.”</p><p>As her soft, pink lips formed the words, Claude found himself pouting, grateful and guilty, but then Hilda smiled at him, like it was a game or a secret … or any other easy thing between them, and he couldn’t help responding in kind.</p><p>His right hand swept up through her hair, folding her bangs back into the pull of the locks atop her head, failing to apply a guiding pressure to tilt her head back and her chin up for a kiss. Although he found he wasn’t disappointed to just be petting Hilda, silly as it might have been. Claude nodded, and curled forward to kiss her instead.</p><p>Hilda leaned in to kiss him back, and her knees dipped down into the couch so that they bumped against Claude’s; the gentle crash of contact enough to encourage them both to move. She adjusted her hair as she went to straddle Claude’s lap, a slow task as he tried to return his feet to the floor without kicking her, but she was smiling, bright and amused as his hands found her back and her shoulders, supporting her weight as she reclined away from him, rocking her pelvis into his lap.</p><p>Claude sighed, but this time it was all desperation, as he bounced them both further from the back of the couch, as if to try and chase her. He tugged at her waist and craned his neck, and smiled as she bent to meet his mouth. Relieved, Hilda straightened her back so that they both sat up straight.</p><p>Spreading her knees a little more, Hilda caressed her fingers across Claude’s neck, her thumbs tracing his jaw, as she pressed her tongue past his lips. Unthinking, Claude whimpered, and Hilda pulled away to check on him, which he allowed for barely an instant before wrapping his arms more securely around her, as he kissed her again.</p><p>His right hand supporting the back of her head, curling in the hair below her bun, Claude slowed their kisses until he could pull away to kiss her cheeks, to bite her chin while Hilda squinted and grunted skeptically, turning her head aside. He thought to lick a stripe up her neck, but nuzzled into the curve when he realized she was protected by her turtleneck.</p><p>Claude turned his head and sought her shoulder instead, reaching for her right hand with his left so that he could stretch out her arm, kissing across her bare skin with indulgent little pecks as Hilda giggled and fidget in his lap; threatening to steal his attention with the sway of her chest and hips as he made to kiss the side of her palm. Turning her hand over let him kiss the inside of her thumb, and her muted soulmark.</p><p>Hilda bent her elbow and he followed her hand as it rose, kissing the lower knuckle on her thumb twice more. When his gaze locked with hers again, he was curious, questioning.</p><p>“I know you bruise Lorenz,” Hilda chided, referring to his soulmark, jolting her hand away. Claude laughed. “And I won’t let you bite me—”</p><p>“Ah—” Claude started to whine in protest.</p><p>“Not there, anyway,” Hilda insisted, emphatic and laughing as she gently shoved the side of Claude’s face.</p><p>He was trying to keep from snickering, caught by Hilda in more kisses as he turned back to look at her. Loosening his grip, he let his hands wander, thumbs pressing up on her arms and shoulders, palms smoothing out the wrinkles of her dress, fingers following the curve of her ass, while Hilda’s hands were gliding across the smooth material of his shirt, finding a button, three, before creeping below the material and over the natural glide of his skin.</p><p>Their kissing slowed drastically, lips caught lazily together, as they idled in the heat of the room and each other; Claude in particular feeling warmth blossom from below his skin where Hilda touched him. He pulled away, swallowing and observant, wondering about whether the temperature of his body and his apartment might be causing Hilda discomfort, but she took a different signal from his motion and kissed his cheek and then above his eyebrow as she stood to disentangle from him.</p><p>“Let me touch more of you,” she suggested, swaying his left arm as she held his hand, not daring to look away from her soulmate.</p><p>Claude nodded, and Hilda smiled, warm and bright and comforting. He let her lead him the first few steps, before using the hand he held to spin her on her stockinged feet on the wooden floor, giggling with her as they kissed and danced for a span of hallway. Hilda put a stop to it, shoving Claude up against one wall so that he cooed in interest and surprise, and she rolled her eyes, walking the last few steps solo, but sparing him a glance as she stepped into his bedroom that had Claude lick his smiling lips in anticipation.</p><p>Hilda bounced into the bed and rolled up towards the wall and the window, her dress hitching precariously as she turned back to turn on the lamp, and then hitching more as she bent a knee and extended an arm into the empty space beside her, tapping on the surface to invite Claude into his own bed.</p><p>The room smelled of lavender, and Claude blew out the candle on the dresser on his way to Hilda, the room awash in lamplight now.</p><p>Sitting on the edge of the bed, Claude turned on his side and leaned back to kiss Hilda before letting the motion pull him to lay on his back, the top of his head brushing against her stomach as he lay in the curve of her body. Hilda stroked at one of his curls, and started moving to sit up when Claude reached overhead, prone as he was, to rest his left hand on the side of her waist.</p><p>Eyes closed, Claude was relaxed, safe in Hilda’s company, and embarrassed, at the mercy of her judgment. He beckoned, “Come here.”</p><p>Having already lay with her bare breasts in Claude’s face, and feeling like his nature was predictable, harmless and playful, Hilda found it easy to lean over him as requested. Claude caressed Hilda’s chest as the warmth of her body pressed into his face, and his hands chased up over her neck and shoulders. Nuzzling against her, he purred appreciatively even as the curve he’d found himself in slipped away.</p><p>“Oh,” Claude whimpered as he realized Hilda was crawling over him. “Ouhf,” and then again as Hilda sat on his face.</p><p>Blushing, she made to lean forward again, meaning to return to her hands and knees and movement, but Claude’s hands curled fast, clinging to her thighs and then to his forearms as he held her in place. She bounced a little, inadvertently, as she giggled, and then intentionally, as she rolled her hips back towards Claude, stopping to squeeze her thighs together when he moaned in delight, hot breath and vibrations tickling her with pleasure.</p><p>He released his hold to grope her ass, but still Hilda moved to sit at his side when she was free.</p><p>Claude was red faced and smiling, and readily accepted two long, soft kisses from Hilda as she slipped a hand into his open shirts. As he undid the rest of his buttons, Claude raised his hips off the bed as three of Hilda’s fingertips threatened to follow the material of his shirt below the band of his pants, but then they retreated back up through the fine hair on the base of his stomach and he settled back into the bed with a happy groan.</p><p>Hilda reached out with her right hand to swipe back some of Claude’s hair as he sat up, while she watched the pulse of his chest as each warm breath resonated through him, and his shirt fell back over his shoulders. She caressed his collarbone, letting her thumb curl under the coil of his necklace.</p><p>“You look good in gold,” she whispered, her long lashes flickering as she locked eyes with him again before closing them as she leaned in for another kiss.</p><p>Claude dragged it out as he pulled himself from his shirt. With his wrists free of his sleeves, he tangled his hands in her hair again, and Hilda grunted pleasurably as he guided her head back, and Claude laughed as he hesitated again, still hindered from reaching her neck. He craned his mouth toward her ear, to sigh over it. “You look good in green.”</p><p>They laughed softly, and Claude moved his right hand to her hip, while his left sought to hold her right again, tilting her palm so he could kiss her soulmark, even muted, even lacking green.</p><p>Hilda crowded around Claude when she kissed him again, forcing him to return to his back, as she rested her weight on her knees and her left hand, and her right hand fumbled Claude’s as they worked at his belt buckle.</p><p>Claude was wondering how different this would feel, physically, emotionally, if their soulmarks were still activating when it were just the two of them. He couldn’t think about it too long, because he didn’t want to imagine what it would have felt like if Lorenz and Hilda had discovered they were soulmates first, only for him to later be viewed as a problem. Hilda could be frustrated all she wanted. He could work at making it up to her. This was better, as far as Claude was concerned. He knew he loved her, even without the sensation of soulmates.</p><p>“I love you,” Claude blurted when Hilda’s lips left his.</p><p>“I love you too,” Hilda promised, letting her hand curl over Claude’s hip as he rolled on his side to pull himself from his pants and socks, throwing them to the floor. She snickered when he rolled back, and touched his lower lip with her middle finger. “My lipstick’s starting to wear on you.”</p><p>Smiling, Claude swept two fingers over his mouth. He held his chin as he asked, “How’s it look?”</p><p>Hilda rolled her eyes. “Either you or I would need to wear more of it for it to look like anything.”</p><p>As Claude shrugged, Hilda pressed on his chest and chased him to kiss the left side of his collarbone, and then his neck, as she straddled his leg.</p><p>She rubbed her body down against him, bending her knees and rocking her feet back and forth as Claude’s arms wrapped around her again, caressing her as she moved her mouth across his skin. Hilda stroked a thumb over some hair on his chest before chasing it with her tongue, and he had his head thrown back, eyes closed, breathing deeply and shivering beneath her, an occasional moan passing his lips as she lapped at a nipple.</p><p>Hilda pinched her legs around Claude’s thigh and reached to fondle him through his boxer briefs as she went back to kissing across his chest. His stomach flexed, bouncing his cock in her grip, and she squeezed him encouragingly.</p><p>“Fuck,” Claude hissed, swallowing so that his chest jolted under Hilda’s welcome weight. As his eyes were still closed, Hilda was surprised his lips weren’t more slack when she craned to kiss him again. She continued to pet him through his clothes and leaned her face away from him, to watch Claude in rapt appraisal.</p><p>“You’re sensitive,” Hilda observed, a declaration like a promise.</p><p>Claude huffed in embarrassment.</p><p>“I’m a sensitive guy,” he joked in agreement, looking at her again, his composure slipping nearly instantly as Hilda crept her hand into his clothing with soft, insistent fingers.</p><p>She squeezed and caressed Claude until he coiled a hand around her elbow, and her lascivious intent was temporarily outweighed with tenderness as she caught sight of the bracelet she’d made around his wrist. She pulled her hand away, letting the band of his clothing snap against his skin, and Claude looked at her, hopeful and desirous.</p><p>“You think you can undress me?” Hilda taunted, and Claude was nodding, desperate, and eager, and interested as she kissed him in preemptive thanks.</p><p>Hitching his leg between her thighs, Claude wrapped his right arm around Hilda, and they bounced on the bed as he rolled them, first on their sides and then so she was on her back, with Claude half naked and hovering over her.</p><p>“You’re so hot,” Hilda praised. She smiled wider when Claude hesitated, as if this were in any way unexpected, and she’d not been saying as much just a moment ago with her lips on his body.</p><p>“You could kill me with that smile, Hilda,” Claude sighed, bumping his knee up between her legs as he kissed her, long and slow, and not quite able to keep from grinding down against her thigh. He licked her lips as he spread his legs around her thighs, straddling her body and wrecked with anticipation.</p><p>“Roll over for me?” Claude asked softly.</p><p>“On my stomach?” Hilda confirmed, kissing his jaw twice more after he nodded.</p><p>Claude nuzzled behind her ear and let himself dip down to be flush with her body, thrusting against her ass twice before adjusting his knees to hold himself up and letting his hands fit under Hilda’s body to grope and caress. He gathered her hair over one shoulder and kissed the fabric on her neck, and her bare forehead, and finally her lips, as she turned to look at him.</p><p>Sitting up, Claude let his hands follow Hilda’s sides, and then rolled them up over her ass until they found her waist again, and massaged over the material of her dress.</p><p>“Can I—?” Claude hesitated, and huffed in amusement when he realized that how he phrased things with Lorenz, would need to change with Fae and Hilda.</p><p>“Can you what?” Hilda asked skeptically, raising herself on an elbow to look back at Claude.</p><p>“Nothing,” he answered quickly. “I’ll ask you in a minute.”</p><p>“Alright,” Hilda allowed, settling back on crossed arms as Claude’s hands slid down across her backside again, his thumbs finding the base of her dress, so that when he pet up towards her back, the garment came with his hands, and bunched around her waist.</p><p>She was expecting it, but Hilda still squeaked as Claude’s fingertips bent under the band of her nylons and he paused again, flattening his hands so that his fingers spread out over the bare skin of her back.</p><p>“Good?” Claude worried.</p><p>“Good,” Hilda confirmed, blushing when Claude leaned over her to kiss the back of her head.</p><p>Carefully, he pulled her nylons and panties below the swell of her ass and Hilda pressed her face into the backs of her hands for a moment, embarrassed by the attention. She craned her neck up, intending to tell Claude to hurry the fuck up, but then his hands curled around her left thigh, and she could feel him delicately rolling her clothing down her leg, as if concerned or conscious of tears, and she laughed once softly as she laid back down.</p><p>“Ticklish?” Claude asked, rolling his thumbs on the back of her thigh, the fingers on his right hand dipping between her legs, pulling away just before reaching her pussy.</p><p>“Something like that,” Hilda teased, flexing and relaxing the muscles in her ass a few times so she bounced beneath him.</p><p>“Mm,” Claude agreed, groping her a little, and then returning to his painfully meticulous task.</p><p>He ran his hands up and down her legs a few times afterwards, as he returned to his knees, finding a comfortable position from which he could kiss the backs of her knees, her thighs, the divot at the base of her ass.</p><p>“Can I lick your ass?”</p><p>Hilda’s shoulders pinched at the question, and she rocked her pelvis back and forth so that Claude’s body twitched in desperation.</p><p>“Please?” he added, trying not to pout as Hilda started spinning on her side to look at him.</p><p>“Let me take my bra off,” she said, smiling as she reached behind herself to work at the clasps through the fabric of her dress.</p><p>“I can—” Claude started to offer, but Hilda shook her head.</p><p>“Just a second,” she insisted, pulling each shoulder strap down until she was able to retrieve the garment through an open sleeve and toss it to the floor, unable to endure the possibility of Claude making a production out of it.</p><p>Claude stretched over her to collect three pillows for her to prop under her chest and stomach as she returned to her knees. He trailed his hand down the dip of her spine as he sat back.</p><p>“We’re going to have to peel you out of this,” he observed; the heat of the room having sealed Hilda in her dress.</p><p>“Do you want to do that first?” she asked, rocking her whole body back and forth.</p><p>Claude huffed in admiration. “Fuck,” he whispered. “No.”</p><p>With that, Claude repositioned himself so that he could run a hand over either side of Hilda; his right hand groping gently as his thumb trailed up and down the cleft of her ass, while his left curled beneath her to rub at her mound. </p><p>Hilda pouted through a smile, as Claude fumbled, and she rocked a little to fit her left hand beneath herself, trying to guide his touch as he leaned forward to press gentle, biting kisses into the base of her ass. Rolling his wrist so that the curve from his middle finger to his thumb rubbed across the front of her pussy, Claude extended his tongue in slow, reverent licks and tender, sucking mouthfuls.</p><p>“Claude,” Hilda chided, finally, and he pulled away, his hand on her cunt moving so that his thumb traced over her lips one last time before stopping. She didn’t wait for him to answer. “You don’t need to do everything at once.”</p><p>Claude blushed as he moved his hand from between her legs to the back of her thigh. “Sorry.”</p><p>She bit her bottom lip as she looked at him over her shoulder, shaking her head, rocking her body again to recapture his attention.</p><p>It was easier then, to massage her ass and her thighs, while engaged in an act that might’ve felt familiar if it weren’t for the enormity of it, or the mountain of differences between Hilda and Lorenz’s bodies. Claude hummed against her skin, a noise of desire and approval when he realized she was still rubbing herself between her legs. He pressed her ass forward, and Hilda rocked herself back towards him with a tortured moan.</p><p>Releasing his grip, Claude caressed over her back and the side of her hip, encouraging her motion as he chased her body with an open mouth. With his right arm wrapped around her thigh to guide her still and hold her close, Claude massaged his left hand back to the swell of her ass, and shook his head so that his tongue swept against her. He stretched forward, letting his tongue drag up Hilda’s body, and then grunted, and curved his body again to bite more securely at the top of her ass, towards her right side.</p><p>Hilda yelped but then Claude asked, desperate and breathy, “Let’s take off your dress?”</p><p>“Yeah,” Hilda sighed, swiping at her face and shifting her legs together on Claude’s side as she rolled onto her right. She blushed, as Claude was already reaching out to force her dress over her stomach.</p><p>As Hilda sat up, she crossed her arms to try and pull herself out of the garment when it felt tight around her neck, and she laughed as she tugged at her necklace to show Claude the reason for her sudden, seeming hesitation. She was removing her jewelry when Claude leaned forward as if to kiss her, and Hilda pulled away, hands raised in front of her face.</p><p>“Oh?” Claude peeped in surprise.</p><p>“I mean—” Hilda whined, but Claude was smiling so big it was goofy and Hilda decided anything she had to say wasn’t worth it and went back to removing with her earrings.</p><p>“It’s fine. It’s good,” Claude tried to say soothingly. He fidgeted nervously, and licked his lips. “Was it good?”</p><p>Hilda had to fight the voice in her head that said he was teasing her, but she managed to smile and nod.</p><p>“Good,” Claude sighed. He pouted as Hilda got her dress overhead, hesitating from reaching out to her again. He rocked back and forth as if from impatience. “More kisses if I use mouthwash?”</p><p>She hid her face in her hands for a moment and then reached out to shove at his chest, avoiding eye contact as she agreed, “And wash your face.”</p><p>“Two minutes,” Claude promised, stumbling away to his washroom while Hilda nodded and stretched out on the bed.</p><p>She found Claude’s shirt, and curled the cool, silky material around her arms, cradling it to her chest as she thought on the differences between this night and their first together, between this night and any other she’d shared with partners who were not her soulmate.</p><p>Claude was blushing as he returned, to see Hilda, bare in his bed. Bending his right leg under himself as he sat, he reached out to caress any flyaway hairs away from Hilda’s face, and leaned in to kiss her as he crawled closer into her space. His left hand dripped down across her body, catching on his shirt and tugging to pull it away as his right hand took hold of her chin, so that he could finally turn her head aside to kiss, and breath against, and gently, hopelessly bite from her neck to her shoulder.</p><p>Hilda cooed appreciatively and leaned into the affection, and extended a hand to grope at his stomach. “Thank you,” she whispered.</p><p>“Gods, but you’re beautiful, Hilda,” Claude hissed, nuzzling into the curve of her collar. He licked her breastbone and kissed his way across her chest, stopping to whimper as she curled a leg around him. He moved to where he could extend his left hand down between her legs, petting his ring finger against her lips and clit before adjusting his hand so that he could touch her, as he had been instructed that first time; penetrating her sometimes, but more often not, as he leaned into the bed and sought her pleasure.</p><p>Hilda purred and arched up towards him, running her hands through his hair and across his shoulders, wiggling sometimes because not only was Claude attentive, but irritatingly intuitive also, and unashamed; so that each kiss and pinch and roll of a knuckle, was eager and amorous in application. Hilda found herself thrusting into Claude’s fingers as he tapped his middle and ring fingertips against where the outer lips of her pussy still mostly protected her clit from her lover’s curiosity.</p><p>“Hold still,” Claude whispered, fond. Hilda bit her tongue at him as she complied, sighing and relaxing as he stroked at the petals of her sex, building up to pressing a finger inside her.</p><p>With a strained hum, Claude started moving his hand, and Hilda tossed her head back, exaggerating her pleasure he was sure, but still his heart stopped as she asked, “So are you going to fuck me or what?”</p><p>“Yeah,” Claude agreed. Hilda laughed at him. “Fuck. Yeah.”</p><p>He crawled away from her, and Hilda sat up, biting her index finger at him playfully as he stood and pulled himself out of the last of his clothes before grabbing a condom from atop a dresser. Hilda swung her legs off the side of the bed as Claude returned, parting them for him to approach her.</p><p>She took his cock in both hands, and Claude sighed in relief, reaching out to touch her hair. Slowly, she increased her grip and watched the strain in Claude’s expression with a smile, until gently letting him go.</p><p>Ducking, Hilda took him in her mouth, squeezing the condom in place, amused that Claude’s hands more or less didn’t react, but his posture straightened so significantly. He whimpered as she looked up at him, dragging her tongue along the head of his cock.</p><p>“Take my hair down,” she ordered, mostly to be cruel. She prepared for snags and less comfortable tugs, but even though Claude huffed, as if he were a little lost, his fingers felt out the position of her hair pins carefully, while Hilda amused herself with his distraction; blowing him as he whined and cursed and snickered. He left a pile of hair pins and three bands on the bedside table.</p><p>Claude carded his fingers through her loose locks afterwards, and Hilda purred around half his cock. He huffed little affirmations when Hilda pulled away, and reached around her to grab the pillows. Pulling her to the edge of the bed, Claude helped her readjust, with two pillows below her waist and a third beneath her neck.</p><p>Hilda curled her feet around Claude’s hips, as if to encourage him closer, because he still looked a little star struck, and she needed some satisfaction before that felt like a compliment. Unknowing, Claude sighed in wonder, and whispered, “Okay.”</p><p>“Okay?” Hilda repeated, squinting.</p><p>Claude prodded the head of his cock up between her lips with a tense expression. He nodded, and slid his hands up and down the front of her calves, bending her legs back towards her. He let go with his left hand to hold himself steady as he brought him and Hilda together.</p><p>He was slow to lean over her, spreading his legs to accommodate the height of the bed, his stomach flexing as his body came in line with hers, shifting back and forth, deeper and more secure each time as her heels pressed into his back.</p><p>“Oh fuck,” Claude groaned, “okay.” Hilda smiled, wicked, and used her purchase on his body to rock herself on his cock. “Oh, <b>fuck ...</b> <em>okay.</em>”</p><p>“Mm,” Hilda agreed, humming in delight as Claude caught himself on the bed and rolled himself forward, fluid and strong. “Good?”</p><p>Claude swallowed and then whispered with a cock of his head, “Different.” He gyrated in a few short, little motions before amending, “Good.” Hilda moved a hand to his left forearm, rubbing her thumb over his soulmark. “I’m good Hilda.” Smiling, Hilda flexed her legs several times as Claude’s body stuttered trying to find a pace. He hissed, “You’re so good.”</p><p>“Yeah?” Hilda taunted. “You want me to get on top?”</p><p>Claude shook his head, straightening up to grab her hips. “I want this. Please. Please let me — <em>oh, yeah.</em>”</p><p>Claude curled over again as they found some sort of coordination in their motions, resting his temple to hers. Hilda ran her fingernails down his spine before requesting, softly, “I need you to go faster.”</p><p>With a pout, Claude laughed and kept pace as he confessed, “I’m trying not to cum.”</p><p>Hilda pressed her nails into the back of his neck as she groaned and humped against him. She moved her feet to his hips and pressed away at him until they separated, and then moved up on to the bed so he had to chase her. On his knees he was heavier, and more stable, so that soon the pair of them were overcome by pleasure and passion, even when the hard bursts of energy lost out to slow, indulgent fucking.</p><p>Hilda swept a hand across Claude’s face, sweat dripping down past his curls, and he whimpered, overcome and grateful. She was sure her hair was a frizzy mess and wondered about how far her eyeliner must’ve smudged. Claude kissed her before sitting back on his heels, and Hilda moaned.</p><p>With an encouraging grunt, Claude wrapped his left arm around her thigh and moved his right hand to her mound, but Hilda shook her head.</p><p>“No, come back,” she beckoned, hands on his chest. She bent her legs as much as she could. “Put my knees over your elbows.”</p><p>Claude whimpered in answer and sought to do as he was told, hands fisting in the blankets beneath her as he found his place. He looked like he was trying to swear, but only another moan passed his lips, and Hilda tried to nod at him, but the power of his hips had her seeing stars and doubting the motion came across as anything other than recoil.</p><p>“<em>Fuck, fuck, fuck,</em>” she squeaked. “Claude, I’m cumming.” Hilda moaned as her admission earned her a harder thrust from her desperate lover. “Yes. Yes, come on. Give it to me.” </p><p>“Hilda!” Claude whined, having been still trying to assure her pleasure without giving into his own, but she took solace in this, and tried to provoke him again.</p><p>“Give it — to me — <b>Claude.</b>”</p><p>“Fuuuh-<em>gho!</em>” Claude choked, cumming rather dramatically while Hilda continued bounce towards his frenzied thrusts.</p><p>“That’s good. <b> <em>Oh, that’s good,</em></b>” Hilda praised, wrapping her legs around him as Claude released them from his arms, vibrating herself against him with some more well-placed flexing.</p><p>“Gods-fucking-dammit,” Claude hissed, following it up with a laugh and a pleasured sob.</p><p>Hilda purred as she spread her legs, and Claude took the cue to move from his place to fall into bed next to her, on his back. Hilda moved her right hand down to curl around his left arm, where their muted soulmarks could meet. She found she was smiling, regardless.</p><p>With a sigh she rolled back against the bed, as if dislodging herself from where they’d been fucking.</p><p>“Mmm,” Claude answered, softly, obviously still catching his breath.</p><p>“So,” Hilda teased, “you fucked your girlfriend.”</p><p>Claude pouted, sighing in tortured desire even now. He turned to look at her. “Hilda…” He swallowed, watching her expression, hoping she saw his sincerity. “I love you.”</p><p>Hilda closed her eyes for a moment, letting the sentiment wash over her. She squeezed his arm. “I love you too.”</p><p>She sat up, and looked at him as if in challenge. “I need a fucking shower.”</p><p>A laugh wheezed out of Claude. He nodded, wrapping his right hand over hers. “Let me wash my hands first, then take your time.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So apparently even when I basically know exactly what I want to happen, it can take a while to write it down... For those who don't know ... I will confess ... I have 15 more scenes I want to explore for this fic. That's probably 15 more chapters. Probably.</p><p>I see my Hits go up with each new chapter posted and I'm like ... this can't be ALL bad. Anyway. Hope you enjoyed this one! I promise they did. asjkdfhgasdkj</p><p>I tried to do a thing with the 4 date night chapter titles. Did you notice? Was it a good choice? The original quote is: "if we want the rewards of being loved we have to submit to the mortifying ordeal of being known." - Tim Kreider</p><p>&lt;3 Wear a mask. Wash your hands! Respect your partners' boundaries! I'd love a kudos or comment, especially if you're a guest.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0025"><h2>25. The Intimacy Of A Dark Room</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><b>Lorenz (10:42 PM):</b> What’s the mood at home? &lt;3</p><p><b>Claude (10:42 PM):</b> comfortable. You on your way?</p><p><b>Lorenz (10:45 PM):</b> yes. now. ｡♡ we’re good too.</p><p><b>Claude (10:47 PM):</b> miss you</p><p> </p><p>Lorenz and Fae expected Claude and Hilda to be in bed, but as they entered, Hilda waved at them from the couch, and Claude was standing from the chair by the window to greet them. The apartment was dark though, devoid of light except from the television, which Hilda muted as they entered. Lorenz might’ve expected the silence to add to the emptiness of the dark, but maybe it was the heat, and maybe it was Claude’s smile, but the apartment felt comfortable, full of home and heart.</p><p>“Hey there,” Claude greeted quietly, pulling Lorenz into a hug. He bent forward to catch Fae in an embrace next, as they’d been leaning down to untie their boots.</p><p>Fae giggled about the interruption and kissed Claude as they straightened, silencing him with three squeaking pecks.</p><p>“Hi yourself,” Fae said warmly, plucking at Claude’s tee shirt.</p><p>Hilda would normally have contented herself to wait, especially <b>before</b> — because there was a before now, and an after. <em> ‘You’ll never wonder who your soulmate is again.’ </em> — She had no desire to prolong their distance though, and smiled when she caught eye contact with Lorenz as she scurried to the others, while Claude asked Fae about the snow and where they had parked for the night.</p><p>As they answered him, Fae offered Hilda her keys, and she winked at Fae as she clasped her hand over theirs to accept them, and then extended her right arm back behind herself within Claude’s notice. He stopped mid-sentence to take Hilda’s offered hand, and then the trio were looking at Lorenz as he hung his coat.</p><p>“We’re not even in the door yet,” he said in feigned exasperation, touching the side of Claude’s neck to bring them all into their soulmate connection. With a sigh of relief, Lorenz leaned down to kiss Claude, soft and quick.</p><p>“He’s been hinting at missing the connection for hours,” Fae said, mocking Lorenz.</p><p>Claude gasped, exaggerated. He asked Lorenz, “Were you rude?”</p><p>Hilda’s eyes blew wide in amusement as Lorenz turned to Fae, a little more earnest in his worry, “Was I rude?”</p><p>Fae chuckled, releasing Hilda and reaching up to Lorenz’s face as he ducked down to kiss them. Fae shook their head. “No, I missed it too.”</p><p>Lorenz looked to the others, sheepish. “Can we go sit down? Or lay in bed?”</p><p>They were already two steps towards the living room when Claude teased, “Long day?”</p><p>“Be careful how you answer that,” Fae warned, a gentle tone.</p><p>“Goddess,” Lorenz laughed, taking a seat in a chair. “Fae did all the heavy lifting,” he said as Claude found the spot on the couch closest to him, glad that the darkness might hide his blush as he shared a smile with Hilda as she put herself in Claude’s lap.</p><p>Claude made a soft interested noise while Hilda bit her bottom lip suggestively at Fae as they sat next to Claude.</p><p>“Nothing I regret,” Fae said quietly, “or wouldn’t do again.”</p><p>Hilda adjusted herself in Claude’s lap so that she leaned back against the arm of the couch between him and Lorenz. She wore a delicate pink nightshirt that just barely met her mid-thighs, a pattern of yellow bows decorated it, and matched the yellow pajama shorts beneath. Fae caressed Hilda’s bare legs as they stretched out across their lap</p><p>Hilda was holding Claude’s right arm as he held her, and he extended his left for Lorenz to take. The glow of the television was insufficient to display their soulmarks, but was enough to bring attention to Claude’s eager smile. Lorenz squeezed his hand.</p><p>“So…” he hesitated for propriety, but slid one hand up Claude’s arm to stroke over his soulmark and asked anyway, “how was it?”</p><p>Claude looked at Hilda, hopeful. “Good?”</p><p>“Wonderful,” she confirmed, gripping his shoulder as he leaned forward to steal a kiss. “I’m sure you have ideas for next time.”</p><p>Claude practically growled in answer, a huff of air filtered through a barrier of teeth, and then whined through pursed lips.</p><p>“Promise of a next time,” Fae contributed, running the heel of their left hand up Claude’s spine.</p><p>“I did get that,” Claude agreed, turning to look at them, being met with a smile. He returned his gaze to Lorenz. “How was dinner?”</p><p>“I did tell Fae about my family,” Lorenz confirmed. “Just a bit.” Hilda started to sit up, and Lorenz quickly added, “And I’m fine. It was good.” Fae was nodding at Hilda as she resettled, and Lorenz worried, half-serious, “I think. Or else they’re far less honest than they seem.”</p><p>Fae looked at him, a mask of incredulous exasperation. “No.”</p><p>They shared a more fond exchange, and Lorenz tried to veer them away from their current focus. “Fae told me of their father in return, and I’ll be thinking about him catching a dozen catfish on one line of hooks looped with bacon whenever I see one for the rest of my life.”</p><p>“<b>Don’t</b> let him know you think that’s a compliment,” Fae begged. “And it was probably more like 8? He’s got me exaggerating his fish stories now.” They laughed. “Oh, but I’m looping back to say that dinner was good and I’d go there again.”</p><p>“Claude’s been making a big deal about food all night,” Hilda said in mock criticism.</p><p>“It’s important!” He insisted. “Eating every day is a privilege that should be enjoyed, and I’m still heartbroken about what happened to the last meal I tried to prepare for you.”</p><p>“Then why didn’t you cook for me tonight?”</p><p>Claude opened his mouth to answer and then snapped it closed, looking confused while Hilda laughed in his arms.</p><p>“You know,” he conceded, “I don’t have a good answer to that.”</p><p>“He just wanted to show you off,” Lorenz teased.</p><p>Goosebumps rose on Hilda’s legs as Fae caressed down her calve and Claude leaned in to kiss her again. “Next time,” he echoed.</p><p>“Mm,” Hilda agreed.</p><p>“So what did you guys talk about at dinner?” Fae asked, curious and innocent. “Just the food?”</p><p>“Shared memories,” Hilda said, keeping eye contact with Claude so that he frowned slightly.</p><p>“And insecurities,” Claude confessed, stroking his thumb over her shoulder.</p><p>“Shared insecurities?” Lorenz prompted, in sympathetic solidarity.</p><p>Claude snickered as he looked up to Lorenz. “Yeah.” When he looked back at Hilda her eyes were glassy, hard to see in the dark, but she also shook her head at him, distressed, and he nodded at her in answer, in understanding. He wasn’t going to force her to have those conversations she’d promised so soon, or in his presence, or while they were settling down for bed. He could trust her to bring it up again, just from knowing her, but now also from being her soulmate.</p><p>Suddenly he jolted, an uncomfortable peep passing his lips as he pulled his hand from Lorenz to reach behind himself, laying the back of his hand flat against his back.</p><p>Fae chuckled as Lorenz and Hilda were struck with concern. “An itch?” Fae asked, incredulous on behalf of the others.</p><p>“Are you fucking serious?” Hilda laughed.</p><p>Claude squinted in embarrassment as he whined, “I’m sorry.”</p><p>“Here?” Fae confirmed, reaching out above Claude’s hand.</p><p>“Yeah, please,” Claude grunted, discontorting himself. Hilda rolled her eyes and Claude pouted, relieved at least that this would happen now, and not earlier. “More towards the middle? Yes. There.”</p><p>As the sensation passed, Claude extended his hand back to Lorenz even as Fae continued to scratch and rub at him through his tee shirt.</p><p>Taking Claude’s hand again, bringing the connection back to the group, Lorenz confessed, “I’m surprised I’m not more distressed to have the soulmate connection broken … when I know there’s the promise of it being immediately restored. It’s only the longer partings … that make me feel like I’ve been missing this all my life.”</p><p>“And you have,” Fae pointed out. They asked in an aside to Claude, “Good?”</p><p>He nodded, and accepted a kiss as Fae crept their left hand around his neck.</p><p>“And I have,” Lorenz agreed, his heart feeling full to bursting. He moved to sit up on an ankle, curling into his chair as he watched Fae and Hilda kiss next when a cold breeze filtered from the hallway. Lorenz gasped. “Did Hilda get you to open a window?”</p><p>“The one in the guest room,” Claude confirmed.</p><p>Lorenz tossed his head back in exaggeration, and then pulled one hand back to adjust his hair. “It usually has to be much warmer for Claude to concede to that,” he explained for Fae’s benefit. He told Claude, “Fae <em> actually </em> has control of the temperature in their apartment.”</p><p>Hilda groaned as if in pleasure, earning a laugh from Fae. She prompted, “Isn’t it <em> so </em> nice?”</p><p>“For more than the temperature,” Lorenz agreed.</p><p>“It is not big enough for everyone to sleep at,” Fae insisted suddenly. “Not comfortably anyway.” They linked a hand with Claude, sharing a smile with him before looking back to the others and adding, “But thank you.”</p><p>“Think I’ll get to see it soon?” Claude teased.</p><p>“Maybe not soon,” Lorenz answered, leaning forward and loosing a few of his buttons. “Unless Fae changes their mind about having us all over.”</p><p>Fae scoffed. “I didn’t say you couldn’t come over.”</p><p>Lorenz hummed, amused with Fae’s reaction. “I know,” he asserted, “but … I don’t know if I want to do more solo dates for a while. Although tonight seems to have been a success,” he failed to slow his growing smile, “I want to nurture <em>this</em>. This dynamic. Being together.”</p><p>He stood and wrapped his left hand around Hilda’s bare arm, keeping the connection as he released Claude’s hand, raising his arm over Claude until Fae took hold of his fingers, so that Lorenz could let go of Hilda, and squish himself to the floor. His right and Fae’s left hand reached down to touch the side of his neck as he sat between their legs, Fae’s right hand curled around Hilda’s calve.</p><p>“So we could visit on an afternoon maybe,” Lorenz suggested. “Or some other time when we wouldn’t be a burden for sleep.”</p><p>“Never a burden,” Fae promised, guiding Lorenz’s hand up to Hilda’s leg, to secure their connection this way, so that they could slouch back into the couch and stroke their fingers through his hair.</p><p>Claude and Hilda huffed in amusement, sharing a silent wonder about whether Fae and Lorenz had been <em> like that </em> the whole night. It was still new, and comical, and exhilarating for this exchange to be punctuated with a kiss, and Claude luxuriated in it, trailing his thumbs down either side of Hilda’s neck.</p><p>The cold blew in again, and Claude pulled away with a groan.</p><p>“I have to go, not-close-the-window,” he assured Hilda, “but close it a bit more, to narrow the opening.”</p><p>“I’ll do it,” Lorenz assured him, reaching out to the table to lift himself to his feet.</p><p>“Why don’t you complain, if temperature control is such a problem?” Fae asked.</p><p>“Because there are seniors in the building,” Claude answered with a grimace. “If we encourage the landlord to lower our temperature, they might think it’s fine to do that for the whole building, and there are people who might need it where it is.”</p><p>“That sucks,” Hilda said simply, even having been aware of their reasoning. She bounced a little, pleasantly distracted. She sat up and moved about to sit in Claude’s lap, feet to the floor, his hands on her thighs. “Still, any criticisms of your apartment are overshadowed by the benefits and good memories. Room enough for us to spend the night,” she lauded. “And where we found out we were soulmates.”</p><p>Hilda winked at Fae as Claude curled around her, and then tilted her head back and at an angle so he could kiss her forehead.</p><p>“Where we first made love?” he suggested, earnest and amorous.</p><p>“Ugh, you have to go and be embarrassing,” Hilda groaned, laughing with Fae.</p><p>“I’m glad one of us can be embarrassing, at least,” Fae contributed. “I love you.”</p><p>Lorenz returned to his soulmates kissing and caught dreamy, needy eye contact from Fae. He moved the table closer to the television, and the couch and floor made for a more spacious area in which to kiss and cuddle than the bed would have. While Hilda initially refused to be pulled to the floor, when Lorenz returned from helping Fae with a towel so they could shower and change into nightclothes, Claude forced Lorenz onto his back so that he could straddle his pelvis, and then it was too entertaining to let Claude guide her down to straddle Lorenz across the stomach to kiss Claude out of his reach until his turn for the shower.</p><p>Fae pressed on the bathroom door as he’d been closing it, to apologize and step around him to swipe a tissue across a tiled wall, collecting some long mint hairs to dispose of in the trash. They apologized profusely for having forgotten, but he was only amused; that they would be concerned about clogging the drain, that they would have this habit, and that, even clumsily, they would fit so neatly into his and Claude’s lives. It was strange to think of trying to build or find a home, or at least, a way of living, with his soulmates, wholly different from any other vision of his future.</p><p>They were waiting for him, in his bed when he got there, and once Fae and Hilda wished him and Claude a good night, they went away to the guest room for the night.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Sunlight tickled Lorenz’s senses, waking him. With a gasp he looked for the clock, and was relieved it wasn’t as late as it seemed. He could hear the others in the kitchen and quickly showered and dressed. They were still talking happily by the time he came in search of food. Fae said he and they would have to leave immediately or they wouldn’t be able to drive him, and while he felt panicked, there was a relief also, at the prospect of being left behind to walk beneath the oddly bright sun to the bus stop. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Lorenz rushed to put on his shoes at the door when a voice called to him from the dining table. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Be careful, or you’ll forget your keys.” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> His mother was seated at the far side of the table, tossing him his key ring. Her face was gaunt, but she was without the oxygen of her worst days, and she smiled as if she were comfortable. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Catching his keys, he thanked her, and headed out into the hall. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Lorenz woke up coughing violently, startling his bed-mate awake. Taking in the situation, Claude reached out to take Lorenz by the back of his shoulders.</p><p>“What happened? Are you alright?”</p><p>With a nod and an upheld finger, Lorenz continued to hold his mouth, unable to stifle his outburst. Claude worried, and moved to rub at Lorenz’s back through the rest of it.</p><p>“Dust … or something,” Lorenz gurgled, strained. “I’m sorry.”</p><p>Claude shook his head. “You’re okay?” His mind went to worse and irrational places, that it would be after sleeping with someone else, that <em> something </em> would happen to steal his opportunity to be with Lorenz again ever again.</p><p>Lorenz nodded again as he started to shift to the end of the bed. “I just need water.”</p><p>“Alright,” Claude conceded, letting Lorenz go.</p><p>He did need water, and it did help with his throat, but his dream wasn’t entirely forgotten, the way dreams sometimes were. The apartment was dark, 3 AM and nowhere near sunrise, especially in winter.</p><p>Lorenz sat at the dining table, and stared at the place his subconscious had placed his mother for a long time. He felt nervous to place his hands on his table, and was painfully slow in doing so. He rubbed the back of one hand, and wondered about his late mother.</p><p>
  <em> ‘Would she have loved you to know you now? Would you hate her, in the way you hate your father?’ </em>
</p><p>“Lorenz,” Claude beckoned, approaching him from behind. “What are you doing?”</p><p>“I…”</p><p>
  <em> ‘You must look like a man possessed, staring at nothing, in the dark.’ </em>
</p><p>“I dreamt of my mother,” he confessed, eyes thick with tears, a bubble in his throat. He nodded across the table. “She was seated just there… She tossed me my keys as I left for work.” He only looked away from the space for an instant, but found that he couldn’t meet Claude’s eyes again, and went back to staring at the empty seat across from himself. “And I have to wonder … if I summoned her, by my conversation with Fae, or if I simply jogged my own memories.”</p><p>Frowning, Claude swept his hand up the back of Lorenz’s hair before leaning forward to embrace him from behind. He kissed the side of his head, and was unsurprised when Lorenz sobbed. Pulling a chair from the side of the table to seat himself next to Lorenz, Claude sat facing him, rubbing his shoulders and waiting as Lorenz leaned into the table, and cried in crossed arms.</p><p>It was the second time Claude yawned that Lorenz was determined to pull himself together. He wiped his face and blinked long and slow.</p><p>“I think I’m going to call my father tomorrow,” he said, and Claude could see and hear that Lorenz’s upset hadn’t quelled. “I-I’m going to ask him if I can go through any old photographs he might have.”</p><p>Lorenz smiled, nervously, seeking eye contact now. “...You’ll be nearby? For after? I am ... not ready to talk to him, but—”</p><p>“Of course I will, Lorenz,” Claude insisted, earnest and exhausted.</p><p>“Alright,” Lorenz agreed with a nod. He kissed Claude’s soft lips. “Let’s go to bed.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I do feel like this is probably the weakest of all my chapters. The scene I wanted to explore for the purpose of this scene was actually scratching someone's back (and I'm sure some of you are like, how is that a scene? But you would be surprised at what my list of scenes looks like. Chapters 19 &amp; 20 had the following scene descriptions: Dad - get out &amp; Party + Cheque), and then I had to try and twist everything around it.</p><p>The dream was added on a whim, and is based on a dream I had of my late grandmother; just saying something kind and helpful. I was (am?) very fond of her, but I do worry sometimes that if she'd known I was bi and polyamorous and nonbinary that maybe her love for me would have been different, or less, the way that the love other relatives have for me has suffered because of their impressions. So I'm just projecting on a bi, polyam Lorenz.</p><p>I originally envisioned this chapter being each a scene of Claude and Lorenz in their bed talking about their dates, and Fae and Hilda being in the guest room doing the same, but after some failed attempts at writing that, I let them all unwind together. I hope it felt natural, even though I felt that Hilda would not be able to handle talking to both of them at the same time about her insecurities at this stage of their relationship, and so now both of those conversations are going to happen in the background.</p><p>Also! Omg. Claude I-Had-A-Power-Rangers-Style-Monologue-About-The-Power-Of-Frienship von Riegan absolutely says embarrassing, questionably-romantic shit.</p><p>Anyway. Thank you for reading! Wishing you well! I'd love a kudos or comment.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0026"><h2>26. First Impressions Go Both Ways</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This and the next (2?) chapter(s?) will combine my interpretation of Claude's family from my fic <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/20599046">Expanded Epilogue</a>, some information they gave us about him in an interview, and some random stuff specific to this AU.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>By Saturday, Hilda had already spoken to each Fae and Lorenz, and something of a schedule was starting to come together, for dancing and meeting parents, and picking up eight boxes of old photographs from Lorenz’s father.</p><p>Too stressed to handle that additional burden, Lorenz was already a little out of his mind about starting his new job on Monday, and Claude was struggling to balance the support Lorenz needed with texting his parents in preparation of dinner the following day. Hilda had spent most of the day at their apartment, and, uncertain how long he’d been at it before her arrival, had allowed Lorenz three hours of uninterrupted job searching before insisting upon a distraction.</p><p>They were still playing a slow game of Civilization V by the time Fae was buzzing up, having finished their day of work. They once again returned Hilda her keys, and had Claude help them set aside a polite bouquet of orange, cat-friendly flowers for his parents.</p><p>As Claude went to organize a meal of freezer food and steamed vegetables, Fae joined Lorenz on the couch to continue the series they’d started. Hilda sat nearby, scrolling through beading patterns on her phone and texting Marianne.</p><p>It was sometime in the evening, after dinner and into the second season of their … gothic-horror-romance, that Claude stood and pocketed his phone.</p><p>“Alright. I’ll be back in an hour.”</p><p>“It’s nine o’clock?” Lorenz pointed out. “Where are you going?”</p><p>“To my parents’ place.”</p><p>Hilda looked up from her phone, clearly just as confused, but Claude only winked at her, so she asked aloud, “Why?”</p><p>“Well, I intended to go by sometime before the rest of you anyway,” Claude assured the others. He scoffed, annoyed in a way that was full of love, and confessed, “So they could get the harem jokes out of their system before you got there.” Hilda and Fae each snorted in amusement, while Lorenz looked apprehensive. Claude tried to smile in a way that might inspire confidence. “It’s fine. Apparently I’m needed to help set some meat to marinading.”</p><p>“They said they would handle dinner,” Lorenz observed, almost as a query.</p><p>“That might have only meant they were going to pay for it,” Claude admitted, his expression smug and his tone exasperated.</p><p>“Oh!” Fae peeped. “Do you want to bring the flowers?”</p><p>“No, fuck,” Claude said quickly. “I want you to do that. I’ll be right back. I think. I hope.”</p><p>“That’s a bad sign,” Hilda chuckled.</p><p>“Be careful on the ice,” Fae offered.</p><p>“Text,” Lorenz requested.</p><p>Claude pointed to each of them in turn. “Yes, yes, and I will. See you.”</p><p> </p><p>The road their apartment was on was not well plowed, but the two major roads and parkway that got Claude to his parents’ place were well maintained, and his journey was short and uneventful. He texted Lorenz as much from his parents’ driveway, and used his key to open the side door.</p><p>The door led to the kitchen, which was dark, and Claude was relieved that it was also bare and clean, even if it seemed they were going to have him cooking from now through to tomorrow.</p><p>“That you, kiddo?”</p><p>His father’s voice came from the living room, kitty corner to the kitchen, and Claude smiled as he sat to take off his boots, calling out an Almyran greeting before asking in Fodlani, “You’d let a stranger so long in your kitchen before confirming it’s me?”</p><p>Several soft excited meows chased his voice and by the time he was leaving his boots on the mat, an old friend was happily tangling himself in Claude’s legs, extending long claws up towards his knees for attention. Claude swept a hand around the greying tortoiseshell’s face, greeting the cat, “Oh, you missed me didn’t you, but I can’t pick you up just now. Later, okay?”</p><p>Claude stood and started making his way to the living room just as the cat flopped, and she meowed in offense as she chased ahead of him.</p><p>“You say that like we weren’t expecting you,” his father said, loud, and suddenly close. He struck the back of one fist against Claude’s chest as he pulled him into an embrace with his opposite arm.</p><p>Claude grunted, squished as he was, but he did his best to follow the formality of the greeting anyway, hugging back as they each kissed one cheek and then the other. Over his father’s shoulder Claude could see soccer on the television, the Brigidian and Morfiot flags in the upper banner. “Who’s winning?”</p><p>“Morfis, if you can believe it,” Nader grumbled, turning and keeping an arm over the top of Claude’s shoulders, weighing him down in a way that had him fussing to pull away. “I don’t think it will last.”</p><p>“You just want to see Almyra beat Brigid,” Claude accused, as his mother’s footsteps started rolling down the staircase. Nader laughed.</p><p>“Claude!” his mother called warmly, even as he rolled his eyes and turned to embrace her. “Took you long enough.”</p><p>“Yeah, yeah,” Claude laughed, kissing each of her cheeks in turn, but he was startled to silence as his father made sense of her teasing.</p><p>“To come help with dinner or to find his soulmates?”</p><p>Claude’s mother stretched far enough away to see all of his face while still being in his space, her hands touching his cheeks and hair. Confused, but unthreatened by the sudden inspection, Claude opened his mouth as if to speak, but then her expression softened, and he clamped his mouth shut instead.</p><p>Claude could hear how his father’s smile stretched his face as he asked from behind him, “Does he look different?”</p><p>“Yes,” she said instantly, and swept her right thumb over his forehead with a soft laugh. “One less crease in his forehead.” Gently, Claude bat her hands away. “Tell us about your soulmates, Claude,” she requested, obviously still looking for something in his eyes.</p><p>With a smile and a blush Claude looked away, feeling his parents’ amusement and curiosity now. “Sure, but let me work on the marinade,” he declared, moving to step past her and back towards the kitchen. “I need to get back to them.”</p><p>Each of his parents called out a version of, ‘Oh, they can wait.’ as they followed behind.</p><p>Claude set to washing his hands as his mother declared she needed to get a pen. They spent some time on task, talking about Fae and Hilda and Lorenz as Claude navigated his childhood home with familiarity, collecting what he would need while his mother annotated his measurements and actions; a recipe he was sure she would lose before he was even out the door.</p><p>While accepting his role in the food prepartion as distracting and scaring away the cat as needed, Nader struggled to recall which story from 1001 Tales that Claude’s situation had reminded him of, a book Claude had read a thousand and one times at the age of twelve. To his horror, his mother had helped him so that they’d called him Kamar for the rest of the evening. Regardless, it wasn’t an uncomfortable time, and their teasing was less crude than he’d worried, and Claude felt satisfied that they might respect his wishes and warnings for the following day as he left the standing rib rack in a cooking bag in the refrigerator.</p><p> </p><p>It was an easy thing to sleep when he got home, even with the others prodding for information and assurances in regards to his parents.</p><p> </p><p>Claude could assume that one of his parents’ reasons for wanting him to cook, besides their own lack of experience, was to prolong their visit, and they left around noon so that Claude would have time to spend some minutes in introduction and relaxation without the burden of preparing dinner.</p><p>His parents lived in a single family home, just in from a corner, with a large triangular yard blanketed in undisturbed snow. Claude could see that the driveway had been shoveled more than the previous day, with their car pulled back towards a tool shed. He supposed they expected them to show up separately, rather than piled into his car, and he said as much to the others.</p><p>“Will it be strange then, all showing up together?” Fae asked.</p><p>“No, it’s just a ride, it shouldn’t be weird,” Claude answered, only sounding half convinced, so that Hilda was laughing as she got out of the car, and Lorenz was reaching out to touch his hand.</p><p>“Things are good,” he whispered, insistent.</p><p>“Things are good,” Claude repeated, starting to smile but startled when Hilda squealed.</p><p>The asphalt of the driveway had a few dips in it, prone to collecting ice in winter. Hilda found one, and then reached out to the side of the house to steady herself, catching her glove and palm against the roughcast stone in a way that tore neither, but stung even as she saved her ankle.</p><p>“Fuck.”</p><p>“Are you alright?” Claude asked, closing his car door and making his way to her.</p><p>“I’m fine,” Hilda insisted, opening and closing her hand. She pouted at him. “Might bruise though.”</p><p>“We’ll get you some ice,” Fae suggested, looking at Claude, who nodded, sighing and casting his face in a cloud of condensation.</p><p>He led them away from the overhanging icicles and around the divots in the driveway, but left them huddled on the porch at the side door for a while as he collected salt from a bucket tucked away in a corner and scattered some out and beyond the path to and from their ride. The door was unlocked when Claude tried his key, and he frowned upon opening it.</p><p>The kitchen was empty again, but the lights were on both here and leading down into the basement, the door to his immediate right open and suspicious. Claude called out another Almyran greeting as he stepped further into the room, exchanging a look with Lorenz as they moved the kitchen table away from the wall so that there would be room for people to gather at all four sides of it, needed at this time for them to sit and take off their winter boots.</p><p>His mother was scurrying up from the basement, her deep voice delighted, “Hilda, it’s so good to see you again.”</p><p>“Hiiii,” Hilda greeted, loud and enthusiastic, and strained in a way that Claude could hear. He was gathering a dish cloth and moving to the freezer, leaving their boots on the linoleum floor. “It’s been a while. Do I still call you Rebecca?”</p><p>“It is my name,” she answered, taunting in her tone.</p><p>“Be nice,” Claude warned, running water over the outside of the rag.</p><p>“What’s going on?” Rebecca asked, noticing what Claude was doing.</p><p>“Oh, I slipped,” Hilda explained, pulling her glove off carefully; the skin was torn, but she wasn’t bleeding, yet the circumstances of their visit still meant that her eyes teared a little, from pain, embarrassment and frustration about making such a silly mistake. The dimples of pressure so close to her soulmark felt heartbreaking. Claude offered her an ice cube in a wet rag, and they exchanged a smile and nod when she accepted.</p><p>Rebecca frowned at Claude before turning back to Hilda, “Well, let me know if I can do anything else for you.”</p><p>Claude was bending to take Fae and Hilda’s shoes, and had to keep from snorting, wondering if it were just his imagination that his mother was repressing a ‘you’ll-get-over-it.’</p><p>“Thank you,” Hilda said, pressing the ice to her hand. She smiled, practiced and polite.</p><p>He intended to return for his and Lorenz’s shoes afterwards, but Lorenz was just behind him, shoes in hand. Lorenz stopped at the edge of the kitchen to turn and nod at the woman of the house. “Good afternoon, Rebecca.”</p><p>“Lorenz, we’re so happy for you,” she cooed, tilting her head and touching her chest.</p><p>With a hum and a quick glance across his soulmates, Lorenz answered, “A blessing, for certain.”</p><p>He followed Claude down the carpeted hallway to the vent and the closet by the front door, and Fae stood, leaving their coat on the back of their chair.</p><p>They faltered, because Claude’s father was just reaching the top of the basement staircase in that moment, and they found themselves facing down both of Claude’s parents. They looked like him, or rather, he like them, and they seemed younger than Fae was expecting, with thick, dark hair, clean skin and deep laugh lines.</p><p>“I’m Faedolyn,” they said, hoping this was enough of an introduction. “A pleasure to meet you.” They were relieved when Claude’s parents, like them, looked in Claude’s direction for a moment, even if they might’ve been doing so to exchange some kind of judgment. “I brought flowers.”</p><p>“That’s very sweet,” Nader said slowly, and Fae was left to wonder whether his hesitation was incredulity or whether he was withholding another reaction. Even so, they continued reaching out over the table to collect the flowers, as Lorenz pressed past them to stand by the kitchen sink and Claude leaned on the end of the hallway. “As I’m sure Claude has told you, I’m Nader, and this is my wife Rebecca,” he accepted the flowers,“and these are lovely. Aren’t they lovely?”</p><p>“And cat-friendly,” Fae added, awkward, their voice smaller than they’d intended.</p><p>“And cat friendly,” Nader repeated, presenting them to Rebecca from her side. She struck him in the chest with the back of her hand as she stepped away from him and towards the doorway to the dining room.</p><p>“Don’t go trying to accept even the smallest credit for Faedolyn’s gift. They are lovely,” she agreed, addressing their guest. “Thank you.”</p><p>“I’ll get them water,” Claude suggested.</p><p>“<b>I’ll</b> get them water,” his mother insisted, “and drinks for the rest of you. You can show them the house. Tea?”</p><p>“Tea’s good,” Claude agreed, the others nodding around him.</p><p>“Wait,” Nader called, as Claude started to lead the others away. He smiled, bashful and guilty, as he pleaded, “Come on.” Claude tossed his head back in exasperation, so that Nader growled, taunting, “Just once. Before— So it’s out of the way.”</p><p>“It’s not a big deal, Claude,” Lorenz offered, and Claude’s sharp gaze flickered from him back to his father.</p><p>“You literally promised you weren’t going to ask,” Claude said, rolling up his left sleeve.</p><p>“I figured you were just embarrassed, but that if it were just your mother and I, that it might feel less embarrassing in the moment,” Nader explained, gentle, while Fae waved Hilda over to rest her back against them, taking her left hand in their own and extending their right to Lorenz, Hilda still clutching her cold compress.</p><p>Lorenz took Fae’s hand, and shared a tight lipped smile with them, as things <em> were </em> still good, even if the kitchen was cramped and Claude’s control over the situation already felt like it were steadily slipping.</p><p>He was slow about reaching out to touch Claude’s wrist, relieved at least that Claude’s parents were only interested in seeing the changes to his own mark, though Fae and Hilda could turn and offer their hands. Undressing, even by a button or two, would have changed his level of comfort with the whole production. He let his grip pulse on the veins on Claude’s wrist, trying to communicate something under the cacophony that arose as a result of their performance.</p><p>“Mama,” Claude blurted, blushing and flustered by her sudden scream.</p><p>She slapped a hand over her mouth, the space still filled with Nader’s laughter. “But I was so worried,” she fussed. She shoved Nader aside so she could advance on Claude, pressing on his chest and neck to shove his head back to move his shadow away from his soulmark. He frowned, and then smiled. “That there would be a lie in it.” She looked him in the eye quickly to amend, “An exaggeration.”</p><p>Claude rolled his eyes, still smiling as he asked, “How would I exaggerate this?”</p><p>“<b>You</b> could,” Rebecca accused. “I know you.”</p><p>“I mean this with all the love in the world,” Nader contributed, interrupting them so Rebecca stepped back out of Claude’s space, “but I didn’t think you’d find your soulmate in my lifetime.”</p><p>“Soulmate<b>s</b>,” Fae corrected, blushing through it.</p><p>“Soulmates,” Nader agreed with a nod towards them and Hilda. “Let go of Lorenz’s hand,” he requested, and they quickly moved to accommodate him so that Claude’s soulmark went dark. Nader barked out a noise of joyful glee, placing a hand over his heart. He told Claude, in Almyran, “If they’re your soulmates they can put up with our excitement a little longer.”</p><p>Claude was adjusting his sleeve when he answered in Almyran, “They are not <em> your </em> soulmates.”</p><p>Nader laughed again, and Claude curled his hand around Lorenz’s upper arm to direct his soulmates into the next room, larger and more spacious, and private, even with his parents just beyond an open doorway.</p><p>The dining table was pulled out with extra slats put in so that it could accommodate eight instead of the usual four. Hilda sat down again, as, mostly for Fae’s benefit, Claude distracted himself by pointing out the decor of the room. There were two cabinets, one filled with glasses and festive plates, and private documents, and a second which housed a sound system, once an old radio, and a collection of unorganized CDs and junk.</p><p>There were three picture frames on the wall, each holding a medley of photographs, children holding frogs and handheld video games and staring at the camera with a look of confusion. One of Claude on Nader’s shoulder derailed Claude’s explanations for a while, as Fae confirmed, “Is that you?”</p><p>However, to Claude’s relief, they soon made it from one open doorway through another to the living room, where the television sat off in an open stand that housed an incense burner and a few other decorations. There were two recliners, sitting back against the wall opposite the television to either side of the open doorway that led to the hallway Claude and Lorenz had been in before, and a couch which backed onto a long window facing the front of the house. A birdfeeder sat half full in a tree out front, half coated in snow.</p><p>There was a stairlift on the stairs leading to the second floor, and Claude explained it was for his sister. At the top of the landing there was a cabinet that housed towels and household items, next to a door leading to the bathroom. To their right was what was now a guest room, its space filled with a treadmill and an extremely dated computer, but which had once held two double beds and a cot, for when his siblings stayed over. The room next to this one belonged to his parents, and the door was closed.</p><p>The last door led to the smallest room in the house, besides the bathroom, and any sign that it had once been Claude’s was absent. There was a low sitting couch with a dozing cat upon it, that startled at their entry, and quickly zoomed down the hall. Hilda took her place on the sofa, and tapped at the sheer curtain obstructing a window facing the front of the house, whose view was completely obstructed by the tree below. The room was full of potted plants and unlike the hallway, was uncarpeted, and the wooden floor was cool under their feet.</p><p>“Sorry Dragon,” Claude called after the cat, but she was already out of sight.</p><p>“Do you want to sit?” Hilda offered Claude, moving a cushion aside.</p><p>He ran a hand across his face, considering his options before nodding and bending further to sit on the floor beneath her. With a soft laugh she scratched her left hand through the curls on top of his head.</p><p>“How’s your hand?” Claude asked, as Fae sat in the space Hilda had cleared for him.</p><p>“Good. Better,” she said, soft and bashful. She could feel the wet cloth against the side of her hip. “The ice is about melted.”</p><p>“Mm,” Claude agreed. He asked Lorenz, “Would you toss the rag in the bathtub? I’ll figure it out later.”</p><p>Lorenz readily went to task, while Fae fussed over Hilda’s hand, massaging her wrist as they observed, “I would have expected your childhood home to be more …”</p><p>“To <b>have</b> more of my childhood in it?” Claude supplied, laughing softly. “There are photo albums in the television stand downstairs, and maybe a bag of some of my old possessions in the basement. They warned me they were going to give my books away when I moved in with Lorenz.” Lorenz returned then, and quickly Claude added, “Not as an ultimatum or anything, they just … didn’t need them, and thought others might.”</p><p>“You took your share of books,” Lorenz teased, moving to sit next to Claude. “We have three shelves and two boxes worth.”</p><p>Claude reached out to hold Lorenz around his back and upper arm, and pulled him into a kiss against his cheek. “Thank you.”</p><p>“For?”</p><p>Claude shook his head. He didn’t want to risk planting the thought. <em> ‘For putting up with me.’ </em></p><p>“We were here less than ten minutes before they started going back on what we agreed on. I know it was just sharing soulmarks, but it’s going to get worse.”</p><p>“It’s too early to start cooking,” Lorenz contributed absently, and he smiled when Claude groaned.</p><p>“I can go embarrass myself some more?” Fae suggested. “I’ll talk about flowers until they question inviting me into their house.”</p><p>The others laughed softly, and Hilda’s fingers found the side of Claude’s ear at the same time as Lorenz wrapped a hand around his, and the connection was soft and familiar, invigorating in its privacy. Claude couldn’t imagine being a couple going through this kind of meeting, where every signal and assurance brought with it this whole huge sensation. For all the complications of having more soulmates, it felt more manageable, to know that he likely wouldn’t be accidentally struck by it while handling a knife at dinner.</p><p>“Alright,” Claude agreed. “Tea could be nice.” He laughed again, “And should be an easy segue into talking about flowers, if the plants up here aren’t already.”</p><p> </p><p>They actually spoke about family and siblings, moving and competitions. It came out that Claude had at least one chess trophy in the basement, a hobby he’d given up at thirteen as a result of their last move, to this house. His father had worked in various construction jobs throughout Claude’s childhood, but coming here had meant the success and stability of an inspector position. Meanwhile Claude’s mother was a librarian, and Claude waiting around books so much and so often had amplified an already extensive love of the written word.</p><p>An hour passed quickly, and Claude had started to relax. Dragon had come to lay curiously by a door frame, and conversation swayed to how the cat had been intended to be companionship for Claude, but had instantly taken to his father far more.</p><p>“Though she’ll love anyone with blueberries,” Claude supplied. He dangled his hand by his side, hoping to entice her with the prospect of scritches, but she was too wary of the size of the crowd.</p><p>“We have some, in the fridge,” Nader said.</p><p>“Fae, I’ll get—”</p><p>“I’ll get them,” Rebecca said, standing, so that Claude raised an eyebrow.</p><p>Then the sound of an engine pulling up the driveway reverberated from outside, and Claude’s expression fell in exasperation. He got up to run to the window at the bottom of the stairs, to see a van parking.</p><p>He tossed his head back, and exclaimed in Almyran, “Mama?! What the hell is this?”</p><p>“It’s just your brother,” she said in Fodlani, pouting. “You love your brother.”</p><p>Claude closed his eyes and took a breath before going to the kitchen. He threw open the fridge.</p><p>While yesterday he had been expecting his parents to have made space enough for him to leave the roast inside, he hadn’t considered that it might be suspect that there had been enough room for a whole second roast. Apparently her written recipe had seen almost instant use.</p><p>“Mama?” he repeated.</p><p>“I wanted to make sure we’d have enough food,” she offered, moving to the kitchen more slowly.</p><p>Nader smiled at the dining table, covering his mouth with a hand, while the others sat, awkward and unsure; Fae most of all, since Claude’s parents had promised him a quiet dinner, and had implied for over a week that it was a meal they had handled, and Claude had confided so little to them about the stresses between his siblings. They wondered if he needed defending, or whether they needed to leave. There was relief then, when Hilda wrapped her hand over theirs.</p><p>Claude opened a lower cabinet and asked in Fodlani, “Where are the potatoes?”</p><p>“We don’t need them,” Rebecca said, sharp. “You don’t need to make potatoes.”</p><p>His brother knocked at the door and Claude shared one more visual exchange of withering challenge with his mother before moving to open it.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Did you guys read 1001 Tales / Arabian Nights in your formative years? I really enjoy the Tale of Kamar al-Zaman. It is in two halves.</p><p>The first half of the story is about a prince and a princess countries away from each other who don't want to be married, but they each have a spirit (an Ifrit) watching over them who argue about who between these two are more beautiful, so they bring them to like a pocket dream dimension so they'll be side by side so they can compare them. The Ifrits decide they're equally beautiful, but the couple wake up and they fall in love (at first sight, but whatever). They spend their waking time finding each other.</p><p>The second half of the story has the princess disguise herself as her husband to save him from a kidnapping, and through a series of good deeds ends up being promised this other woman's hand in marriage. She comes clean to the other woman, who is enamored by their love story and agrees to help her. And then these two women save the husband and he takes the second woman as his second wife and everyone is happy.</p><p>The message I took from this story was no matter what troubles you might face, that in the end there will be people around you you've chosen that love you (in this case romantic but not necessarily) and that you will be safe enough together to have joy and family (in this case children but again, you do you!!).</p><p>Anyway. Happy birthday Claude von Riegan. I wrote you parents for your birthday.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0027"><h2>27. Food As A Love Language Is More Than The Meal</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Desktop users, take a Cheat Sheet going in (my apologies to mobile users):</p><p>Name - age when Claude was born - current age - current partner &amp; children - job<br/>Sarim - 13 - 38 - Shohreh, Ana 4, Noor 6 - city planner<br/>Sara - 11 - 36 - Ami, Ben 10, ??? 5 - human resources<br/>Asmaa - 8 - 33 - high school science teacher<br/>Sajad - 5 - 30 - forestry inspector<br/>Rumaisa - 3 - 28 - Isabelle - physical therapist<br/>Claude - 0 - 25 - soulmate investigator<br/>Rebecca - 31 - 56 - librarian<br/>Nader - 35 - 60 - building inspector</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was easier than Claude expected to mask his distress, being greeted with smiling, squealing nieces. The kitchen was loud then, as Claude collected Ana, the youngest, in his arms and took Noor by the hand to lead them in, out of the way of their father, carrying a bag on one arm and a large tupperware bowl in both hands. Greetings and embraces were exchanged, and kisses between the brothers, as room was made for the removal of snow covered boots and outdoor clothing.</p><p>Free of these trappings, the little girls ran to greet their grandfather, and while Claude regret a little that he was leaving his father to introduce his partners, he followed his brother to the closet, helping to clear the kitchen so that he could ask softly in Almyran, “You had to bring everyone?”</p><p>“Did you think I would leave my very pregnant wife alone with two small children?” Sarim answered in Almyran, tilting his chin in challenge. Claude had more tact than to ask why they wouldn’t have hired a sitter. His brother warned him, “Besides, we are not half the guest list.” Claude hissed, taking a deep breath, and Sarim chuckled, turning to face him, their task complete. “We should all be bringing food. And Sajad might only pop in and out after dinner. Congratulations.”</p><p>Sarim’s congratulations were so casual, that Claude almost didn’t register them, and he had to shake a confused expression off of his face so that he could thank him. They left Claude’s mother to run a mop over the grime on the kitchen floor, and Claude introduced Sarim and Shohreh to Fae and the others. More hugs were exchanged, and kisses between father and son, as the crowd in the dining room started to stand, wondering if they should relocate.</p><p>Rebecca returned, and confirmed for Shohreh that she’d placed her tabouleh in the fridge.</p><p>“You know, if I knew we had so much meat to cook, I would have already been preheating the oven,” Claude whined, as politely as possible, leading a train of Sarim, Rebecca and Lorenz back into the kitchen, where the others could assume he was doing just that.</p><p>Ana and Noor were leaning into a long window frame behind their grandfather, whispering to each other as they admired the smooth expanse of white in the backyard. Noor called out over her shoulder, “Mama, can we go play in the yard?”</p><p>Shohreh froze a little as she smiled, and the exhaustion of a parent who had just helped their children from their winter clothes leaking through a little. “Let me rest for a little while—” she began.</p><p>“Of course you can rest,” Hilda insisted, advancing on the woman. She looked between her and Fae, seeking their consent to suggest, “Fae can go outside with the girls, if you like?”</p><p>Shohreh looked to Nader, and he assured her, “I’ll go with them.”</p><p>After sharing a smile with her father-in-law, Shohreh nodded at Fae and told her daughters, “Have fun then, and behave.”</p><p>Hilda led Shohreh to the couch in the living room and let her speak about her aches and fatigue. While Hilda had initially seated herself far enough away to feel respectable, soon they were huddled together, giggling about partners and expectations, and the importance of finding help when it was needed.</p><p>The crowd in the kitchen called out a line of questioning down the hall as Fae and Nader helped the little girls back into their outdoor things, but this was easily settled, unlike their own conversations. Rebecca was still trying to comfort Claude, when he only wanted to swallow his upset and move forward.</p><p>“Do they make you uncomfortable?” Sarim asked Lorenz, who had seated himself in a chair at the kitchen table across from the oven, in the farthest corner of the room.</p><p>Lorenz huffed, his expression sympathetic. “Not at all,” he whispered, nodding at Claude and his mother. “They’ll be fine in a minute.”</p><p>“Not them,” Sarim laughed, sitting next to Lorenz as the front door closed. “It’s just been you and Claude for a while—”</p><p>“Ah,” Lorenz peeped, blushing. “Yes, well, it’s … it’s been good. Things are working out.” He massaged his left thumb, for a moment, steeling himself to say, “They are my soulmates too, after all.”</p><p>Sarim smiled, seemingly satisfied, and then shouted at his brother, “Claude! You don’t need to guard the oven by standing in front of it while it’s just us here. Come sit, sit, sit, sit.”</p><p> </p><p>The sun and the wind had cooperated enough that it was a pleasant afternoon, to be out in the snow. Fae wondered a little about in what ways they were being judged and measured, rather than simply relied upon, but it was fun, anyway, to lay in the blanket of white next to where Nader had thrown his grandchildren, and make lopsided snow angels. The girls and Nader each warned Fae about where some raspberry bushes might be buried, but otherwise it was all lawn inside the hedges. Digging and piling began in an effort to make a few paths that were far too shallow to call tunnels, but which Noor and Ana cut out with authority, designating their halls with imaginative functions.</p><p>Eventually, Nader couldn’t keep crouching in the snow, and moved to stand by a tree as Fae helped pile some snowballs, food for the “snow snakes” that tunnelled outside their sanctuary, supposedly.</p><p>Inside, Lorenz had ended up explaining the rules of Civilization to Sarim, while Rebecca had brought soda to the living room, and turned on the television to play under the conversation she joined and half-took-over between Hilda and Shohreh. Feeling a little pushed out, and unneeded, Hilda retreated to the kitchen, and Claude was instantly standing again, on instinct. She was stifling a giggle as she approached him in front of the oven.</p><p>“You okay?” she whispered, leaning into the arm he wrapped around her.</p><p>“Yeah,” he scoffed. “I knew this was a possibility … probability. Likelihood.”</p><p>“Let me know if you need an excuse to leave? Family emergency?”</p><p>“No,” Claude snickered. “Thank you.”</p><p>“Alright.”</p><p>Claude kissed the side of Hilda’s forehead and his brother groaned from where he sat at the table, interrupting himself to ask loudly, “Is this not a public space?”</p><p>Tossing his head back in exasperation, mouth open and silent, Claude looked physically pained by his mother’s voice from the living room, “What’s happening in there?”</p><p>“Your son is kissing people,” Sarim answered, shaking his head in challenge at his brother.</p><p>“On the lips?!” Rebecca balked.</p><p>“On the forehead! Don’t get excited,” Claude insisted. He pouted at Hilda, who was blushed deep pink, and facepalmed.</p><p>“I can’t go back out there,” she said quietly.</p><p>Sarim was laughing softly as he gestured to an empty seat at the table. “Come, sit with us instead. Are you still working with Claude?”</p><p>Lorenz shrugged, hands lifted slightly in loss and sympathy as he looked from Claude to Hilda, and tried to keep up with the change in conversation.</p><p> </p><p>The game Noor and Ana were playing was interrupted when another car started pulling into the driveway, and the group outside followed after it eagerly.</p><p>“Asmaa! My baby,” Nader called as he walked around to the driver’s side. He turned to Fae and asked them to get more salt while the little ones eagerly greeted their aunt in Almyran.</p><p>Leaning on her cane, Asmaa exited her vehicle slowly, and answered her nieces with each a soft touch to their faces before allowing her father to embrace her.</p><p>“No trouble since I saw you last?” Nader queried.</p><p>“None,” she confirmed. She squealed a little when Fae came around. “Ah! You’re one of Claude’s soulmates! I’m so happy for you. Come, come, come.” Fae was glad to be rosy from the cold, to cover up some of the blush that grew from being greeted so warmly, but they readily accepted the hug, careful not to squeeze or unbalance the woman.</p><p>“This is Faedolyn. That you recognize them by sight, does have me wonder if Claude’s been more forthcoming to you than Rebecca and I,” Nader accused. Addressing Fae he added, “Not that he hasn’t had very nice things to say about you.”</p><p>He cleared his throat. “Anyway, this is Asmaa.”</p><p>“The baby?” Fae asked. “Besides Claude?”</p><p>“No, I am just <b>a</b> baby,” Asmaa joked, opening the door to the back seat. She directed her father, “Get those, would you?” As he leaned in to collect two foil covered dishes, she finished, “I would be the middle child, except for Claude.”</p><p>“Like me!” said Ana, jumping a little.</p><p>“That’s right,” Asmaa praised as she curled her hair behind her ear with her free hand, showing off a pale hearing aid. “Your little brother or sister will be here so soon.”</p><p>“Well, I’ll still be the oldest, like Baba,” Noor said in Almyran, a little haughty, so that her aunt and grandfather were explaining that while it was nice to remember, that it didn’t give her the right to be arrogant as they walked to the side door.</p><p>“Anyway,” Asmaa said at the top of the landing, “I know you by sight because Rumaisa and I went looking through Claude’s social media, because <em> I </em> didn’t remember Hilda, though she did.”</p><p>Fae opened the door and their opportunity to reply was quickly stolen by exclamations of greetings. Asmaa’s trays of potatoes were left on the counter, and Claude ran to grab an extra chair or two from the dining room for everyone to pull themselves from their boots. The siblings kissed and Asmaa had Sarim put her keys on the wall as she sat next to Hilda.</p><p>“It’s been so long,” Asmaa accused, playing up that she’d met Hilda before despite having confessed to not remembering it very well. She pouted. “And your hair’s grown so long and beautiful.” She looked to Lorenz and then to Claude. “You’re too lucky, always have been.”</p><p>“It’s catching up to him,” Lorenz teased.</p><p>“No husband today?” Claude asked, ignoring the bulk of the conversation, feeling overheated by the attention and the oven and the gathering crowd.</p><p>“No, I left Yaser at home with some of the potatoes. I figured you’d be cooking enough.”</p><p>“You left your soulmate at home with a lonely spot of potatoes?” Sarim laughed.</p><p>“He’s an adult,” Asmaa said, dismissive.</p><p>“They didn’t make you carry the potatoes to your car by yourself did they?” Claude asked in Almyran.</p><p>“We’re not that absent minded,” Rebecca groaned in Almyran from the door to the hallway, and Claude looked away, feeling satisfied and justified, rather than shameful; it would not have been the first time. “Thank you for helping,” she added, in Fodlani.</p><p>As the conversation continued, Rebecca led Shohreh and her grandchildren into the living room, finding an animated film with colourful talking animals for them to watch. Sarim revived his and Lorenz’s conversation about games to Nader’s delight, and though Lorenz sought an excuse from his soulmates, he found himself roped into a game of chess with the champion of the household, Nader the Undefeated. They set up the board in the dining room, leaving Hilda and Asmaa to keep Claude company in the kitchen.</p><p>The men playing chess explained for Fae that Claude’s chess prowess, at least at the time, had gone beyond winning over his peers, having had the chance to play against older competitors and in competitions with no age requirement, not always winning, but having a skill and mind for it. Significantly, however, he never won against their father.</p><p>Lorenz wasn’t concerned about winning, under the circumstances, only wishing to do well enough to not embarrass himself, though he would have still been motivated to try to best Claude. Unfortunately, he started playing particularly slow and clumsy when they began to ask about his plans for work and career goals, even as kind and mundane as their questions had been.</p><p>Fae was going to get drinks for the dining room when another car turned into the driveway. They did a two-step with Claude as he went to stand in the open doorway from the dining room to the living room. He asked his mother, seated in a recliner with a view of the window, “Who is it?”</p><p>She gave him a firm look, so that by her silence, he knew.</p><p>Claude returned to the kitchen, chased by his mother. He and his brother had never been able to get along when there was a crowd.</p><p>When it were just the two of them, <em> ‘Sometimes,' </em>   things had been fine, even amicable, <em> ‘Maybe,' </em>  but even in their smoothest interactions, there were memories of worse moments. Insults and unpleasant accusations of him and his mother, claims that any nickname given by their father was because he couldn’t be bothered to remember the name of a sixth child, were only some of the things that had passed his brother’s lips. More serious explorations of how Sajad’s mother and siblings had suffered for the separation of their parents, hadn’t been explored in some years, and Claude pointing out the selfishness of those assertions had never helped.</p><p>Being here with his soulmates however, brought a specific memory to mind, of Sajad insulting him in Almyran, repeatedly, at a dinner where Lorenz had been present, something of four years ago. Their father had defended him, but too late and too quietly for anyone to ascribe value to the act.</p><p>“Be nice,” his mother hissed, and Claude smiled, tempted to say he was always nice. It irked him that she would beg him like this, knowing that she must’ve been the one to invite his siblings. His father would have lamented their presence, but not acted upon it. “Your father is getting old,” she said softly, in Almyran. “It means a lot for him for you to all be here. If you visited more often, then this might not happen.”</p><p>Disappointed that her logical argument had to be punctuated with a veiled criticism, Claude’s expression fell as he nodded.</p><p>The front door opened, cold and loud. Rebecca and Asmaa greeted the latest arrival as he swung the door closed behind him. The snowy gust spooked Dragon from under a chair, and she raced past Claude as he smiled, careful and practiced, and embraced his brother.</p><p>Sarim and Sajad made their way down into the basement to collect a few extra chairs, though the crowd was seeming smaller than Claude had feared, with Sajad also having arrived alone.</p><p>Fae found themselves once more trying to step aside, to give Asmaa room to make her way to the living room, when they approached Claude, left alone except for Hilda while his brothers were in the basement.</p><p>“Did something happen?” they asked him gently, having heard, but not understood, the quiet words he and his mother had exchanged.</p><p>“Nothing new,” Claude said with a smile and a wink.</p><p>“Fae,” Hilda called, tapping the empty chair next to her.</p><p>Claude was happy to let Hilda try to explain something of his relationship to his brother, and sat with them, quiet and trying not to fixate.</p><p> </p><p>“You brought your kids here?” Sajad asked his eldest brother, a man who at one time he would have called his only brother.</p><p>Sarim lowered a stack of chairs to the concrete floor. “And what of it?”</p><p>Sajad twisted his chin back and forth, shrugging with one shoulder. “You’re fine with them being around—?”</p><p>“My siblings?” Sarim suggested. His tone was casual, but firm. He started separating three chairs from the pile. “Because if you were going to say anything else, I would throw you out myself.”</p><p>“You used to hate him too,” Sajad said, trying to justify himself as he accepted the smaller stack of chairs.</p><p>Sarim scoffed, a mirthless laugh that was all sadness. “You’re still judging what you think he represents?” Silence answered him, so Sarim straightened his posture and looked his brother in the eyes. “Sajad, <b>I was a boy</b> and so was he.” He sighed. “Have you not grown up, little brother?”</p><p> </p><p>When Sarim and Sajad returned from the basement, Fae and Claude helped them unstack the chairs and distribute them to the dining and living rooms. The brothers settled again in the dining room, engaging in loud, Fodlani conversation and taunts about the ongoing chess game.</p><p>Rebecca popped in and out of the kitchen then to collect snacks and things for the children, and when she left, Claude gasped and looked down the hall. Dragon was curled up by the front door, away from the foot traffic, staring down the hall back at him.</p><p>“Fae,” Claude beckoned, even though they were just two feet away. “Do you still want to offer blueberries to Dragon?”</p><p>They nodded, smiling, and Claude could see that Hilda softened next to them too. He gathered a plate and found the resealable bag in the fridge; the crinkling of the plastic enticing the black and orange cat to trot up to the kitchen doorframe.</p><p>“So patient,” Claude praised, giving Fae the plate. They kneeled on the floor by the counter, close to where Hilda was sitting, bringing the plate close to the floor, but not laying it down as Dragon took a few tentative steps forward. Leaned against the fridge, Claude kicked his foot out so the cat had to hop over his heel as she sped up in her approach when Fae let the plate down.</p><p>“She’s a sweet, old girl,” Fae agreed, moving to sit cross legged against the cabinets. Dragon raised her head in nervous assessment, but it just made her audience giggle. “Yes, you,” Fae confirmed.</p><p>An exclamation of disappointment rang out from the dining room and the trio snickered.</p><p>“Poor Lorenz,” Hilda said softly, watching the plate slide closer to Fae as Dragon pushed it across the floor with happy licks.</p><p>“He’s distracted at least,” Fae observed. “From tomorrow.”</p><p>Dragon seemed to decide that her plate was suitably empty and looked from Fae to Claude as she sat up, licking her lips.</p><p>“I was too,” Claude admitted, tense in a different way for just a moment, finding himself relaxing as if in sympathy, as Dragon leaned her neck into Fae’s wiggling fingertip.</p><p>“It’s good of him to want to feel more in control,” Hilda said, thoughtful. She sighed, and looked as if she wanted to say more, but was cut off by a call from the living room.</p><p>“Taxi’s here,” Rebecca announced.</p><p>Claude lit up. “That’ll be Rumaisa, she’s closest to me in age, and, well, gay as the day is long.”</p><p>“Oh, I like her already,” Fae said eagerly.</p><p>“Hand me that,” Claude requested with a bit of a laugh, referring to the plate. Fae did so as they stood, and the door opened.</p><p>“Claude!” Rumaisa hollered upon seeing him, and he almost shattered the plate in the sink. She laughed about this, loud and triumphant. She shouted out, as if for the household, “I brought donuts and raspberry sorbet!”</p><p>Rumaisa had short shaved hair and loud, tacky clothing, completely contrasting the muted professional attire of the woman who entered behind her, who waved something of a peace sign to Fae and Hilda, her thumb extended at the same time as her middle and index fingers.</p><p>Claude turned from the sink to give his sister an incredulous look and she rolled her eyes as she dropped some grocery bags on the table.</p><p>“Don’t look at me like I’m weird! You’re weird! Mister three soulmates.” She embraced and kissed her brother. “Literally the only thing I remember about Hilda is that she liked raspberry sorbet,” she turned to the woman in question as she begged, “and please tell me I remembered that right?” Hilda was smiling and nodding enthusiastically, and Rumaisa looked at Claude as if she’d bested him in something. She raised her hands and beckoned Hilda with fluttering hands. “Good, then come hug me!”</p><p>Fae felt that Rumaisa had the same kind of energy as Asmaa, if dialed up to eleven.</p><p>“You remember Isabelle?” Rumaisa confirmed, reintroducing her girlfriend to Claude, and while they embraced, Fae found themselves the next focus of the enthusiastic woman’s attention.</p><p>“Fae? Faedolyn?” she asked.</p><p>“Fae’s fine,” they agreed, hesitating before finding themselves squished in Rumaisa’s strong arms.</p><p>“It’s nice to meet you,” Rumaisa hummed, earnest and loving. She was barely pulled away far enough as she shouted to the house, “Where’s Lorenz?!”</p><p>“Rumaisa!” Asmaa chastised, suppressing a laugh and some curse words. “Be quiet!”</p><p>Rumaisa ducked into the dining room so she could shout around the corner directly into the living room, “Oh, I’m sorry what were we doing that was quiet!?”</p><p>“Watching a movie!” Asmaa answered.</p><p>“Well pause it, I’m not done!” she laughed at her sister.</p><p>Turning to the table in front of her, Rumaisa greeted her father softly in Almyran, hugging and kissing him, and then separating herself to scold him. “Baba! You can’t just rope your guests into hour-long games when there’s so many people to meet!”</p><p>The men at the table started voicing arguments and justifications, but she was already moving around the table to grab Lorenz by the arm, forcing him to stand.</p><p>“And what the fuh— is this boy’s club? Mingle! For Gods’ sakes!”</p><p>Sarim gave her a look of warning about the insufficient way she’d censored herself, and then rolled his eyes.</p><p>Led into the kitchen, Lorenz laughed a quiet, “Thank you.”</p><p>“Any time,” Rumaisa said, excited and buzzing as she pulled him into her arms. “I’m so happy for you.” She asked Claude in Almyran from over Lorenz’s shoulder, “Can I call him brother yet?”</p><p>“No,” Claude said, quick and sharp. “Not yet.”</p><p>This embrace was lasting longer than the others, and even when they separated, Lorenz saw that Rumaisa’s eyes were red, and he quickly pulled her close again.</p><p>Claude put away the sorbet and moved the donuts to the counter, surprised when Asmaa came to sit with their group, until it became obvious that Rumaisa had guilted everyone in the house into reorganizing.</p><p>Rebecca brought the children upstairs to draw on long pads of paper with markers while they finished their movie in her bedroom. Shohreh and Sajad sat together to watch a show about house repair, while Rumaisa squeezed herself and Hilda into one of the recliners where she could put a braid in her hair and get her to talk about herself and her family with Nader, in the opposite chair. Fae and Asmaa were talking about her career as a high school science teacher, with Claude’s encouragement, even as Asmaa and Sarim sidetracked the conversation with tales of them and Claude as teenagers.</p><p>Meanwhile, Lorenz found himself brought aside to sit with Isabelle on the foot of the stairs, in line with the television and close enough to the living room conversation. They could have passed for socializing or watching the film, but she was quiet and her shoulders were tense, and Lorenz felt strongly that he could guess why.</p><p>“What was it like?” Isabelle asked, staring straight ahead, her voice soft and brittle. “Finding out it was him?”</p><p>He thought for a moment to correct her, to speak of the importance of it being all of them as soulmates, and not only he and Claude, but it wore thin in his mind. To her, it wouldn’t matter, and it didn’t need to. “It’s been wonderful.”</p><p>It was about two years ago that Lorenz had met Isabelle. They didn’t have so much in common, whether by time or by interests, that they were instant or great friends, but being gay and having a partner who wasn’t your soulmate had given them a camaraderie and understanding. Lorenz hadn’t thought of how this change in his and Claude’s dynamic might affect others who’d known him beyond cursory support or disapproval. He’d never bothered to think too hard of the relationships of others independently, his own emotional baggage had always felt sufficient.</p><p>There was something unsettling now though, to think of Isabelle and Rumaisa being at a crossroads. Conceivably, this could be the last time he’d see the woman of Duscur and her resigned expression.</p><p>She scoffed and smiled. “Rumaisa’s been trying to twist the news… To convince me that it’s a sign that ‘You never know.’” She leaned on the wall away from Lorenz to where she could look him in the eye and stare down the hall to the kitchen. “But <b>you</b> always did.”</p><p>“Isabelle,” Lorenz said, frowning, “Claude and I cannot be what ascribed value to your relationship. No one can take what you’ve built from you.”</p><p>“Her father doesn’t even need to say anything,” Isabella lamented, “just by his actions from years ago, you can see how he values soulmates.”</p><p>“That’s unfair,” Lorenz protested. “You can see how he values <em> his </em> soulmate, and his opinion should also be separate to—”</p><p>“I know,” Isabelle interrupted. “It isn’t just him though. I think… I think it’s important to Rumaisa, even if she wants to pretend it’s not.”</p><p><em> ‘And you still love her,’ </em> Lorenz realized.</p><p>There must have been something about Lorenz’s expression, loss and distress, that touched Isabelle differently because she raised her hands, apologetic. “I am happy for you.”</p><p>He sighed, nodding and setting her at ease. “And I’m hopeful for you. Whatever that means,” his inflection clear that this was meant to be all-encompassing, and not dismissive.</p><p> </p><p>Claude was checking on the roasts when Sajad came into the kitchen, pointing past him as he ordered, gently, as a request, “Hand me a donut.”</p><p>Claude looked at him with the insult of a homemaker who’s dinner was about to be served.</p><p>Sajad tossed his head back, a mockery of annoyance and exasperation. “It’s for Shohreh.”</p><p>Caught in a pang of guilt, Claude quickly handed his brother the box, from which Sajad plucked one donut to hold between his teeth as Claude made a noise of disbelief and irritation. With muffled laugh, Sajad did grab a second one, assumedly for his sister-in-law, and handed Claude back the box.</p><p> </p><p>Soon the front door was bursting open as the final guests arrived, Claude’s sister Sara and her family calling out Almyran greetings and shuffling in out of the cold. She and her husband Ami had prepared roasted butternut squash, tomato salad and cookie bars, and Claude eagerly whispered to her that she was a saviour.</p><p>“They’ve not been too hard on you, have they little brother?” Sara asked, hissed and serious.</p><p>“No, I think things are going well. And you’re just in time.”</p><p>“I planned it that way,” she promised.</p><p>Sarim’s children hurtled themselves down the stairs with such a speed that Lorenz and Isabelle might’ve worried they’d fallen had they not witnessed the act. They were quickly standing up out of the way for the cousins to reunite in the kitchen; a room that was quickly becoming crowded until three of the children raced back down the hall and up the staircase.</p><p>Lorenz and Isabelle stood at the doorway to the kitchen, and he jumped when Hilda touched his back. Smiling wide she asked, “Are you feeling tall?”</p><p>Lorenz tried to stifle it but Isabelle and Hilda laughed for him, as he had at least four inches on everyone in the room.</p><p>“Maybe I should have been on hand, though I doubt Claude needed anything atop their refrigerator,” he teased.</p><p>The three of them were quickly pushed into the room by Rebecca, returned from upstairs, and the flow of people found their way to the dining room as greetings and introductions continued.</p><p>Even as empty as the kitchen was afterwards, Claude announced, “Alright, no cats or kids in the kitchen!” He stopped to laugh because Sarim and Ami seemed to be making fun of him. “I’m doing a thing,” he finished, lamely.</p><p>Ami and Sara’s eldest, Ben, seemed to run up from the hall just to be in the kitchen again to ask, “Can I stay?”</p><p>“Are you asking me if you’re a kid?” Claude asked, laughing harder, but Ben just nodded, wide-eyed, hopeful. “Get out of here!”</p><p>“Ben!” called his grandfather from the dining room. “Come here and tell me about grades!”</p><p>The ten year old tossed his head back exaggeratedly and dragged each foot on his way to his grandfather.</p><p>Claude moved the roasts to the table and the stovetop, covering one in foil while Rebecca cut the other, and placed Asmaa’s potatoes in the oven to reheat.</p><p>Hilda volunteered to collect the children from the second floor, and had them set the table.</p><p>“Alright so how many people are we now?” she asked idly, but this had been a mistake, as while she and Noor were trying to calculate it, the younger two were pointing at people at random, and repeatedly counting up, inflating the guestlist beyond reason, and restarting a number of times. Seeing Hilda overwhelmed by this only encouraged their silliness, so that even as Hilda realized that the group was eighteen and started planning accordingly, they also took to counting and exaggerating the place settings and stacks of cutlery.</p><p>When they were finished, Hilda let their relatives keep watch over the children, to keep from playing with the sharp objects, and returned to lounge in the recliner. Fae sat on the arm of the seat and stroked the back of their hand against her cheek.</p><p> </p><p>Dinner was messy, both by organization and presentation. The dining room table was set, and some people sat at it, but otherwise the second roast and the side dishes were presented on the kitchen table, for people to make plates and bowls to take into the living room, sitting on the couches and the floor, rather than wait for a second sitting at the table.</p><p>Claude was forced to sit at the dining table, supposedly having earned it, but it wasn’t a welcome position, with all three of his soulmates in the next room. However, it was surprisingly fun to talk with Sarim, Rumaisa and their father about soulmates; differences in meeting them, knowing them, not having them, how they related to his work. It felt … normal.</p><p>After dinner, some people had dessert while others started cleaning the dishes, while everyone was singing praise: of Claude’s cooking, of Sara’s dishes pairing so well with the meat and the tabouleh, of Rebecca’s decision to invite everyone. It was light and overwhelming, better than some other gatherings by far.</p><p>Claude nodded to Lorenz, directing him upstairs, now free of the children, and took a moment in what had been his room to hold him. Familiar and honest, refreshing in a way that the conditional kindness in his family was not, even as rewarding as it was.</p><p> </p><p>Hilda sat on the couch with Noor, who also had a soulmark on the inside of her hand. Noor asked what color Hilda’s was, or what it looked like and showed Hilda a bunch of drawings she’d doodled this evening of her own soulmark and how she thought it might change someday.</p><p>Having returned to serving, Claude handed each of them a bowl of sorbet and blushed deep while half bent over.</p><p>He looked over his shoulder to where Rebecca, Sara and Shohreh were gossiping in Almyran.</p><p>“Hey, hey, hey,” he said, as if in protest. “I can hear you, you know.”</p><p>“Then be discrete,” Sara said dismissively, waving her fingers at her brother.</p><p>Claude rolled his eyes and left, so Hilda asked Noor, quietly, “What were they saying?”</p><p>“They were saying about how soon they had babies after finding their soulmates.”</p><p>Hilda bit her lips and took a breath. Shelving that, she asked Noor if she knew what calligraphy was, with her soulmark drawings being so pretty.</p><p> </p><p>Claude found Fae in the dining room telling Nader about their father, and sat next to them silently, listening for a way to contribute or for any discomfort. He leaned on his right elbow, ready to stand and find more to do, his left hand on the edge of the table, and was surprised when Fae reached out, wrapping a hand around his own, and slowly he relaxed and let himself become a natural part of the conversation, letting their joined hands drop off the table to rest on his thigh.</p><p> </p><p>It was another hour and a half before people were leaving, and another half hour until it was just Claude, his soulmates, and his parents.</p><p>Dragon pulled herself from behind the couch with a few nervous meows.</p><p>“Aw, would you look at that. Coming to say bye?” Claude asked, seated cross-legged on the floor at the end of the coffee table. She let him pull her into his lap, eyeing the others nervously while he rubbed her until she felt secure.</p><p>“You’re headed out?” asked Nader.</p><p>“Well soon,” Claude confirmed, stretching forward to look at the clock on the cable box.</p><p>“We’ll still call, you know,” Rebecca promised. “Even though you’ve found your soulmates. And you should still visit.”</p><p>Claude smiled and nodded, but seeing the sadness in it, Lorenz was the one to answer. “He will. Thank you.”</p><p>“Be careful with your soulmates, Claude,” Rebecca said.</p><p>“He is,” Lorenz insisted, feeling Hilda place a hand on his elbow. Claude furrowed his brow, feeling scolded for nothing.</p><p>“We trust you,” Nader told his youngest. “These are very fine people you’re sharing pieces of your heart with.”</p><p>“Thank you,” Hilda peeped, trying to pull some attention off Claude; and it worked because Nader looked at her. “You’re so very kind to say so.”</p><p>She went on in her compliments, until they had rambled so far and away from her original point that Fae was able to jump off of them and change the subject. Claude had to keep from snickering and pressed his face into the back of Dragon’s head.</p><p> </p><p>Finally leaving, Claude turned around in the driver’s seat to face the others.</p><p>“That wasn’t so bad?” Claude meant it to be a statement, but even he heard it as a question.</p><p>“It was fun,” Fae assured him.</p><p>“I have to go to bed,” Lorenz announced. “I’ll be well rested for my new job tomorrow.”</p><p>“Can you drop me at my apartment?” Fae asked as Claude started the vehicle.</p><p>“Oh, sure,” Claude answered slowly.</p><p>“I’ll be back tomorrow.”</p><p>“Okay,” Claude agreed. “...And my family didn’t factor into this decision?”</p><p>“No,” Fae said, sounding amused.</p><p>“Alright,” Claude conceded. He sighed. “Did anyone give you a hard time?”</p><p>“Claude, relax,” Hilda begged. “If they did, it’s over. We’re going home.”</p><p>“Well fuck, did they?” he groaned.</p><p>“No,” echoed the others in the vehicle. They laughed at him then, gently, and recited things they’d learned and happier little moments of the night, as if to set him at ease.</p><p>Lorenz held Claude and Hilda’s hands as Fae kissed Claude in parting, a last moment of the connection for the night.</p><p>It wasn’t a surprise to either of them when Hilda said that she’d go home too. She hugged them both tight, wishing Lorenz luck, and found her own car on the roadside.</p><p>It might have been a reminder then, of other family gatherings, to be domestic with Lorenz before going to bed, but there was little to be felt when they finally reached their apartment besides exhaustion. Claude clung to Lorenz’s back until the last moment, when he rolled over for sleep.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>AAAAAAAAAAAAAA.</p><p>17 named characters (18 if you count Dragon) and 1 unnamed. It's a lot. I hope it flowed well, that you got a sense of everybody, that it made sense and wasn't too Out There.</p><p>I thought about having Sajad voice something of an apology, but that resolution would be for another time, and probably not this fic.</p><p>I hope that you got the sense of Family that I was trying to portray, and that it did not make you uncomfortable. Thank you so much for reading this far.</p><p>We're over 100k words deep now! If you're reading this, it can't be an accident. &lt;3333</p>
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<a name="section0028"><h2>28. How Could You Choose</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Lorenz’s first day had been mostly technical training, related to forms he shouldn’t be overseeing as a new employee anyway, sorting systems and the personalized mail codes of this particular organization. He was relieved to not be feeling physically run down by the end of the day, and changed into something more professional (a shirt that breathed less, and a suit jacket) to make his way to an appointment at the bank to deposit his father’s cheque.</p><p>He arranged to be expected at his father’s home the following week, and didn’t want to risk going to see him and finding some reason for his father’s offer to be withheld or cancelled. Although he supposed it still could be, regardless.</p><p>However, if he was going to try and find a more palatable use for the funds than returning them to his father, there would be a security in seeing them deposited, despite the stress it might cause him.</p><p> </p><p>Fae was waiting for him, even though the bank was only four blocks away, insisting that the ride was no trouble. They’d discussed on Saturday that as they had the day off that they might collect some things from their apartment, since they were spending so much time at Lorenz and Claude’s.</p><p>It still seemed hard for Lorenz to concede to the offer until it extended beyond him, so that while he ran his errand, Fae would drive Ignatz home, sparing him a bus ride. Fae anticipated Lorenz’s pride objecting further when he realized what they had in the backseat.</p><p>They were ensuring the box they’d arranged was suitably propped behind the driver’s seat when a knocking came upon the passenger side window.</p><p>They smiled at Lorenz and Ignatz, and waved their hand inward until the men tried the doors.</p><p>“Hey strangers,” Fae greeted.</p><p>“Hi,” Lorenz answered, reaching into their lap to hold their hand, a million words behind his eyes that he held there, and Fae had to wonder whether he might’ve said more if not for the presence of his friend.</p><p>“Hello,” Ignatz said, winded from falling into the backseat. He was adjusting his hair and glasses as Fae looked back to him. “Thank you again. I really do appreciate the ride.”</p><p>“You’re welcome. It’s no trouble,” Fae confirmed, restarting the engine. “How was Lorenz’s first day? Anyone give you a hard time for nepotism?”</p><p>Ignatz chuckled. “The job is too menial for this to look like a favor. They’ll be happy to have the extra body so long as he’s not obvious about job hunting.”</p><p>“I’m not really ‘in it’ yet,” Lorenz added. “My day was slower than Ignatz’s.”</p><p>“Boring?” Fae teased.</p><p>“A welcome change of pace,” Lorenz agreed.</p><p>“Don’t expect that to last,” Ignatz said, mournful.</p><p>“I wouldn’t,” Lorenz assured him, amused. He spoke more of the other three new hires and other trivialities until Fae was slowing the vehicle again, ejecting him in front of his destination. He said a more serious goodbye to Ignatz when his friend exited the vehicle, and waved to Fae as he turned away from his ride.</p><p>Ignatz dropped a bag in the passenger seat and looked back and forth between Fae and the bank. They watched him patiently, but still he blushed. “Just a minute?”</p><p>“Sure,” Fae confirmed as he closed the door and took out his phone. They tried to determine what he might be doing for a moment, before sitting back to watch for oncoming traffic instead. Their mouth tightened in amusement as Ignatz skipped across the street behind their SUV, and observing him now, they could see he was taking photos of the building.</p><p>When Ignatz settled back into the passenger seat, adjusting his bag in his lap, Fae prodded, “Collecting evidence?”</p><p>“What? No, heh.” He leaned his phone screen towards them. “I love it when little works of art sneak their way into the design of a building. Just a little sign of creativity from someone, a builder, an architect, an artist, who thought to make their creation unique.”</p><p>His photos showed three little statues of birds worked into the corner of the brick and stone.</p><p>“Ignatz, that’s lovely.”</p><p>Ignatz brightened. “There’s an apartment complex a few blocks from here with some black iron cats worked into their fencing. I’d really have to dig to find those photos now but…” he trailed off as he turned his phone towards himself and Fae waited. When he presented his device again it was of a digital painting of what was, undoubtedly, the building, a black ironworks cat twisted between the bars of a fence, while a grey tabby stretched away from the statue, wary and curious.</p><p>Fae giggled. “Cute!”</p><p>“I find myself thinking often of theories that paleolithic art may have extended beyond the inside of caves, and that one of humanity's first instincts was to immerse ourselves and our landscape in art and memories. I wish more than echoes of that lived on.”</p><p>“Have you worked on any public art projects?” Fae asked, and covered their mouth to keep from laughing again as he blanched.</p><p>“I … I don’t think I’d be good enough for that,” Ignatz said, embarrassed. “I’ve never practiced working on anything larger than a typical canvas, and it’s been a while since I touched practical mediums. Expensive and messy, and I don’t quite have the room.”</p><p>Fae shrugged, sympathetic. “Maybe someday.”</p><p>“Maybe someday,” he agreed.</p><p>They smiled and nodded ahead of them. “So, where are we headed?”</p><p>Ignatz lived about twenty minutes away by car, which would have been anywhere from forty minutes to an hour by bus. Fae waited a few minutes at his destination to text their soulmates, and was satisfied when they didn’t receive a response from Lorenz as they headed back to collect him.</p><p> </p><p>Hilda was staring at job postings. She had no intention of applying anywhere yet, but she was thinking about what Claude had said, and was curious about her options. There were a number of clerical positions she was confident she could get a call back from, and she wondered how Claude would feel about her leaving to do nothing more exciting than what she did here with him, even if it were with a company that offered better compensation than their two-man team.</p><p>With a stretch and a sigh, she set down her hand gripper and flexed her fingers. Claude was arguing with someone on the phone, which Hilda snickered about because all she could hear was Claude’s increasingly loud and polite insistences, and had to imagine what was being said on the opposite end of the line.</p><p>She was relieved to have yet another distraction when her phone buzzed.</p><p><b>Fae (04:12 PM):</b> Has someone bought Ignatz a canvas roll before? They’re like 80 bucks before shipping</p><p><b>Hilda (04:13 PM):</b> fjdhasgkdjf well I haven’t??? Why?</p><p><b>Fae (04:15 PM):</b> I think he needs a push. Ask Raphael, and then ask if he wants to go in with me on getting him one.</p><p><b>Hilda (04:16 PM):</b> okay. :smiling emoji: if we’re getting one, i’m sure more than Raph will help pay :kiss wink emoji:</p><p> </p><p>Claude hated when he was told he was being put on hold only to be met with silence. Too much uncertainty with whether the call was dropped, or that the person on the other end hadn’t simply muted him, rather than being put on hold. He muted himself as if in retaliation, letting his arms and fingers twitch and curl in the privacy of his office as he sat himself in his chair. Some of his irritation melted away as he checked his phone.</p><p><b>Fae (04:11 PM):</b> collecting Lorenz from the bank :hand peace sign emoji:</p><p><b>Claude (04:15 PM):</b> :smiling face with hearts emoji: drive safe</p><p> </p><p>Lorenz looked lighter as he re-entered Fae’s vehicle, thrown inside with his momentum that Fae wondered whether his kiss in greeting was premeditated or an accident of relief. They held around his chin, smiling as he leaned back into his seat, taking their hand in his.</p><p>Fae tilted their head and waited, in case his experience might’ve come with worries or confessions, or whether Ignatz’s absence might give him room to mourn or argue. To their mixed disappointment, Lorenz only asked, “You weren’t waiting long?”</p><p>They shook their head and pulled their hand away toward the wheel.</p><p>“Do you mind if we stop at the grocer? I figured since we have some time today, that we could make a more complicated dinner.”</p><p>He easily agreed to the detour, and argued only a little when they insisted on paying.</p><p>“My food budget has been more than cut in half, spending so much time at your apartment,” Fae insisted, in line at the check out.</p><p>“That doesn’t mean you have to rush to pay for food,” Lorenz protested. “Neither Claude nor I would begrudge your spending, even if—”</p><p>Fae jabbed him lightly a few times as he was interrupted by the cashier, and propriety kept them both in good behaviour for the rest of the transaction, finishing the matter. They politely made contact with the cashier — collecting bags and shaking hands, and tangled their fingers together on the way out.</p><p> </p><p>“What’s this?” Lorenz leaned on the hood of the vehicle, clear of snow and cold to touch. He frowned as Fae pulled the box out of the backseat.</p><p>“My pantry,” they declared.</p><p>“What?” he squawked and moved to meet them as they walked around the back of their SUV.</p><p>“Just noodles, spices, dehydrated potatoes,” Fae said, half laughing and spinning away and Lorenz tried to reach for the box. “To contribute to how you’ve been housing Hilda and I these past few weeks, and, hopefully, to enjoy with you in the next few.”</p><p>“You realize that I’ve yet to receive my last paycheck from my old job, yes?” Lorenz asked, chasing after them to open the door. “We’re fine on money.”</p><p>Fae shrugged, their brow furrowed in thought. “Let me contribute,” their voice was soft and deep, and tickled at Lorenz’s mind. He touched the back of his neck absently, thinking of all the things he’d let them do, both sexual and mundane, for the benefit of their company.</p><p>“So long as you know it isn’t necessary. You don’t need to earn the time you spend with us.”</p><p>“Maybe I’ll have to take it all back anyway,” Fae said, with a smile. “Between brands you hate and dietary restrictions.”</p><p>Lorenz rolled his eyes as they entered the elevator, assuring them, “We’ll make do.”</p><p> </p><p>They washed up and Lorenz directed Fae through the kitchen as the pair of them put things away, Fae doing their best to learn better how to navigate the kitchen. He left them to start cooking to call Claude from the bedroom in the evening, assuring him about his first day, revealing what Fae had done and asking him to collect toiletries since they hadn’t done groceries on the weekend, and he’d yet been too modest — embarrassed, Claude insisted — to suggest that detour when he’d been out with Fae.</p><p>As such, Hilda arrived first and by the time Claude returned home, it was to her and Fae dancing in socked feet in the living room, while Lorenz lay on the couch, scrolling through more job postings on his phone. To be met with joy, and then still given time to himself, to be understood and respected, and loved… He couldn’t exactly rush himself to unwind, but he was eager to shower and change and be with them.</p><p> </p><p>They ate fish and vegetables, and wild rice Fae’s father had bought from an indigenous market. It was different, and comfortable, and full of teasing Fae that they’d brought their pantry and then tried to use half of it to eliminate the evidence.</p><p>There was a lull in conversation when Lorenz took a deep breath as the others ate before he declared, “I’ve been thinking about the money.” The others watched him with curiosity, and he frowned, “And I’ve been thinking — not to put too fine a point on my upbringing — but I’ve been thinking that it’s not that much.” He sighed while he suffered the judgement of the others, Fae was outright coughing in shock. “If someone needed surgery, or if you fell and slipped on the ice tomorrow...” he suggested, gesturing to Claude. “It isn’t an amount beyond what someone who is middle class might have saved, for emergencies.”</p><p>“So you want to save it?” asked Hilda.</p><p>“No.” Lorenz extended his hands in front of himself as if in frustration, “My father says I’m still his heir and … if he wants to have a relationship with me, then I have to assume that if we were in dire straits then, much as I’d hate it, he would probably …” Lorenz sounded pained, “offer support.”</p><p>Fae coughed one more time, a stuttered end to their outburst, and Claude couldn’t help a chuckle. “You alright?”</p><p>“Mm,” Fae hummed, holding the base of their neck. Their voice was hoarse as they asked, “So what are you thinking of doing? Paying off debts?”</p><p>Claude snorted once more in amusement as he looked back to Lorenz, “Gods, I hope not.”</p><p>Lorenz shook his head and scoffed. “No, I … I was thinking that I should offer some of it to Raphael. He has the bed and breakfast, and his sister’s schooling, but then … anywhere from ten to twenty-five thousand might get us a house.”</p><p>“We can <em> save </em> for a house,” Hilda suggested. “I mean, I say that having next to no savings, but—”</p><p>“But you’re right,” Claude assured her. He looked back to Lorenz critically. “I don’t want you to always feel like you owe our home to your father.”</p><p>He smiled, grateful and sad. “Thank you.”</p><p>“Fae’s ready to move in,” Claude teased, bringing attention back to their box of supplies. They rolled their eyes and Hilda felt her heart sink as she wondered whether, when Claude said ‘our home,’ whether he meant to include everyone. Not that he could get rid of her at this point, but it felt fast.</p><p>“Do you two need more space?” she asked, turning from Claude to Lorenz.</p><p>“Do you?” Fae asked as the three of them turned to look at her, and Hilda shrunk and shook her head.</p><p>Claude offered her his hand under the table, and smiled when she took it. “Everything’s been perfect so far,” he promised.</p><p>“Claude and I wouldn’t need a house for just the two of us,” Lorenz said, smiling as if amused. When Claude looked at him, he added as he placed his gaze back on Hilda, “Even if it were just the two of us, you know we prefer the noise and vibrancy of company.” His smile widened to taunt, “You’ll have to deal with us hosting.”</p><p>She extended her tongue in an expression of disgust, leaning away from Claude and his outstretched hand as she told him, “If you’re hosting, you’re cleaning.”</p><p>Claude winked, and then stretched his arms down in front of himself, tilting his head back towards Lorenz, “So the money?”</p><p>He bit his lips for a moment, taking a deep breath, “Well, Raphael, and … I was saying medical costs are expensive.” His fingers slid down the part of his hair, thoughtful and nervous, released with such speed as he tried to dispel that nervousness, that the adjustment he’d made to his coiffure was almost instantly lost, sending strands skyward with static. “There are surely others in need of the money now, as we aren’t. We could sit in, find people looking for donations online, and make a night of it?”</p><p> </p><p>Lorenz called the bank the following day to forewarn of the recent funds' imminent disappearance. He bused home with Ignatz that evening, and had an emotional conversation with Raphael, before insisting he take a cheque for more than half of the money; enough to redo the plumbing, and put a dent in Maya’s school debts.</p><p>In spite of the awkwardness of the interaction, and the sometimes heated atmosphere, Lorenz was lighter when Hilda picked him up, so much so that he found himself flung from one emotional hurdle to another, as when they returned to his apartment, they made out in the parking lot.</p><p>Claude and Fae were late, chatting with Dedue and keeping him company while he waited, awkwardly, for Dimitri, after his shift.</p><p> </p><p>On Thursday night, the apartment was dark once again except for the glow of candles and Fae’s laptop. It was easy to wonder whether the blackness would always take them back to that moment now, of their soulmate discovery; as they basked in the soulmate connection, and giggled and drank wine, and nickel-and-dimed away the majority of fifteen grand.</p><p>When it was done, Lorenz whispered, soft and slurred, to Claude, “You forgive me?”</p><p>With a smile, Claude shook his head, and in his inebriated state, Lorenz pouted, distressed.</p><p>“<em>I</em> forgive you,” Hilda teased from Claude’s lap, and Lorenz looked at her, hopeful.</p><p>“There’s nothing to forgive,” Fae chuckled, on the floor at Lorenz’s side, sliding their hand up and down Hilda’s bare leg.</p><p>“Mm,” Claude agreed. “We’ll be okay.”</p><p>“How much is left?” Lorenz asked again, resting his chin on Hilda’s knee to where Fae could kiss him.</p><p>“Enough for half a month’s rent,” Hilda answered, looking at her phone again. “And a little extra.”</p><p>“Enough to go dancing,” Claude taunted.</p><p>“Enough to go dancing,” Hilda echoed with a laugh.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Sorry it took so long to get this chapter out. I've been going through some personal stuff. I'm hopeful the next chapter will be much sooner despite desires for it to be longer and more, uh, robust?</p><p>I originally expected them to go through Lorenz's photos this chapter, and to discuss the money later, but obviously that is not what happened. Maybe this chapter offends someone, but it's ... just wish fulfillment. I want to help everyone, but you can never help everyone; and there are times where you can't help anyone, and are the person in need of help. Anyway. Be kind to each other. &lt;3 I'm rooting for you.</p>
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<a name="section0029"><h2>29. You Know What They Say About Dancing (Claude x Lorenz x Fae x Hilda)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p></p><div class="center">
  <p> </p>
  <p>    <br/></p>
</div><div class="center">
  <p>I drew this thing.</p>
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    <p>The inside of the club was dark and warm. The noise of the music, of the conversations, of the drinking, created a secure, social bubble of joy in the sterile, white chill of December. Hilda felt she had every reason to smile as she dragged her partners through the coat check, to the dim glow of the bar.</p><p>She goaded them into starting with a shot, and could already see how their nerves played at them; Lorenz concerned about the technicalities of dancing and the length of his limbs, Fae fretting about their heels, and Claude wary of the crowds and foreign touch, as always. Their anxieties felt small, and manageable, and Hilda wanted to help dismiss them so that she could show off her partners.</p><p>It felt like it had been a common occurrence, when she’d come on her own, for a couple or twelve to do nothing more than exist on the dancefloor for everyone to see the change in their soulmarks, instilling jealousy and stealing attention. Hilda even convinced Lorenz to leave his buttoned shirt in the sleeve of his coat, in order to show off his more subtly situated soulmark upon occasion, in the collar of his tank top.</p><p>Fae was far more exposed, in a dress made of amber sequins that barely covered their mid-thigh, though the motivation in their outfit had only been <em> fun</em>. Whereas Hilda had allowed herself to dress for comfort, covered far more than she might’ve been when she’d come out with friends or alone, but in clothing that allowed movement; in a black springy skirt and pink spaghetti strap top that hugged her figure under a jacket of gold bugle beads.</p><p>“So start in the crowd, or start in a corner?” Fae asked, wrapping an arm around Hilda.</p><p>“In the crowd,” Hilda answered with a kiss. She winked at Claude afterwards, to assure him of her attention and secluded corners yet to come. Though she could tell, despite his apprehension, that he’d dressed for dancing just as she had; his green paisley t-shirt festive and soft, and his black pants, not-quite-jeans, baggy enough to accommodate squatting and motion, even if they were more modest than Lorenz’s faded skinny jeans.</p><p>Fae let Hilda slip away then, to take Claude by the hand and lead him towards the swaying bodies. No one of note would be performing tonight, and so there wasn’t a gathering around the stage, but rather an array of patrons who pulsed and danced to simple bass heavy beats.</p><p>People were mostly confined to themselves, groups and couples, and Claude was surprised that after Hilda found a space for them that he could extend either elbow without risk of bumping into anyone. He supposed it might be different if it had been a night geared towards finding soulmates, or with a particular performer, but as it was, it was easy enough to focus on Hilda and bob to the music in a way that had her laughing.</p><p>“Oh come on, I know you have better rhythm than that,” Hilda begged, resting the bottom of her right wrist, soon the underside of her forearm, on Claude’s shoulder as she advanced on him, letting her eyes close comfortably as he wrapped his right arm around her. Hilda was biting her bottom lip in a smile, close enough to Claude now to feel him sigh as he melted into her direction and the music.</p><p>It was easier with her guidance, to move more sensual, less playful, though they were both still laughing as his left hand dripped down her arm into her hand. Hilda leaned back and stepped her left foot forward, forcing her thigh between her partner’s legs. Looking down into her eyes, Claude realized they wouldn’t really need the room if they were dancing this closely.</p><p>Fae and Lorenz joined them, and while Lorenz had at first assumed he could get away with swaying and acting as a backdrop for the others, in the way that some other taller dance partners did in such venues, Fae was leading him by the hand to insist upon footwork.</p><p>“Stop thinking about it. Stop thinking about it. Stop thinking about it,” Fae chanted, shaking their head and smiling brightly when Lorenz's anxieties seemed to burst like a bubble as he bumped into a pillar. Relieved that maybe that would be the worst of his luck for the evening, Lorenz dared to feel encouraged, and took something of a lead in their momentum. They were out of sync as he extended one leg aside and Fae would be chasing to match him, but it was easy to see that this was more of a game than a trial in coordination.</p><p>Lorenz hesitantly shimmied his hands and Hilda called, “No, make Fae do it with you.”</p><p>Confused, he took hold of Fae’s hands and wobbled them, and Fae tossed their head back in a full body laugh, their partners wheezing a quieter amusement.</p><p>“Noooo,” Fae said, recovering. They spun their back to Lorenz and led his left hand in front of their left thigh and his right hand in front of their right shoulder. “Now do your thing.”</p><p>“Oh, Goddess,” Lorenz groaned, aware of not-only his partners’ attention on them as he repeated the motion, but then Fae was mimicking it, shimmying their hands in front of their chest and stomach as they found the beat again, leaning forward and back until more laughter overtook them and broke them apart.</p><p>“Alright, alright,” Lorenz conceded. “That was fun.”</p><p>“Oh, oh,” both Claude and Fae were groaning.</p><p>“Two minutes of dancing and you’re trying to sound like you’re done,” Claude chastised.</p><p>Lorenz tried to scowl, but there was too much joy in his face. He stuck out his tongue.</p><p>The music faded into a song with more of a latin beat and Claude and Hilda were swaying their opposite hips in triplets to the tempo, as if it were practiced <span>— and really it was, a lifetime ago, part of a dance mostly forgotten — </span>smooth and fluid. Fae and Lorenz slowly eased closer together in something of a four-step pattern, knees knocking at times, or hands slipping away from one another if a step was missed. He found himself distracted from his lead, watching the sway of Fae’s hair, and how it framed their face, their neck, their chest. It took him a minute to follow their gaze. The necessitation of steps forgotten, Lorenz wrapped an arm around Fae’s waist as he pulled them together, for them to grind upon his thigh, as he and they watched Claude and Hilda undulate together.</p><p>They traded partners a few times afterwards, their dancing more obvious as amateur and playful as the night went on. Reaching out to one another, they sought more than lingering touches that secured their soulmate connection, but they tolerated songs and more of disconnection, giving them individually (Claude and Hilda especially) time to show off.</p><p>A slow song had offered an excuse for a long drawn out moment of touch. There was another group nearby, of three, clearly friends and far more intoxicated, who each wrapped each other in arms at a distance so they could still sing and giggle as they swayed to the music. Lorenz held Claude up under his chin, too close to see anything more than his back, but this was still more than he saw of Fae, who had an arm around his back as they hugged his side and curled a hand around Claude’s bare elbow, and more than he felt of Hilda, who was wrapped inside Claude’s left arm for the duration of the ballad.</p><p>When the song ended, Fae suggested they get more to drink, and they and Lorenz neatly carried six glasses between them to a table on the second floor which Hilda had, correctly, promised would be vacant. It was up a half-stair and next to a table behind a pillar where a couple was obviously unhappy to be interrupted. Hilda whistled as they left.</p><p>A particularly sexual song started playing and Claude groaned around a mouthful of water. “You ruined their night right before it got good.”</p><p>Fae hid a smile behind their fingers as they rested their weight on an elbow on the table, shaking their head.</p><p>“Fuck ‘em,” Hilda agreed, raising her paloma mocktail in salute, working herself out of her long, sparkling jacket.</p><p>They gossiped about experience with dancing through different milestones of their lives. Fae had done some traditional Fodlani dancing as a child, and some choreographed performances in high school, but as part of a biyearly musical, and not in competition, the way Hilda had. Lorenz had been in something parents dared to call ballet from ages three to five, and then something like ballroom in his few years at boarding school, but everything afterwards had only been recreation, usually at Hilda’s behest. Claude’s experience was even less formal, dancing as a matter of tricks and taunts and community, all for fun and attention until twenty years old, and then really only privately, in intimacy and celebration.</p><p> </p><p>Two glasses of water sat half empty, three alcoholic beverages at least three quarters done, and Hilda’s non-alcoholic drink was finished when a song came on that had Hilda and Fae exchanging a look and a laugh.</p><p>“What is it?” Claude asked, eager to be let in on the joke.</p><p>“Hilda taught me a dance move to this song,” Fae conceded.</p><p>Hilda started standing and waving her fingers at Fae for them to follow. Claude laughed.</p><p>“Is teaching a love language?” he goaded.</p><p>“Everything I do is for love,” Hilda exaggerated, giggling as Fae wrapped their arms around her and backed up against the wall.</p><p>They swayed at odds, which bounced them together to the beat of the music, as they waited for the snare drum to sound again. Hilda ran her hands through the base of her hair, pulling it up and back to expose her neck and back to some cool air, causing her jewelry to jingle, onyx earrings catching the light. Fae held their right fist up aside Hilda’s left hip and jerked their hand three times, as if starting a gas motor, Hilda swaying her bottom as if tethered to the motion.</p><p>Fae cracked up upon seeing Lorenz and Claude’s expressions, and Hilda laughed too, a little delayed, as hers was brought on a little from embarrassment, and mostly as a result of Fae’s reaction. She leaned into her partner and Fae raised their hands up to hold the back of Hilda’s upper arms until the giggles stopped. Afterwards they were limber and lax, dancing together for fun, rather than performance, though the nature of the music and the fun, still offered allure and invitation to their partners; Hilda twerking while Fae swept their hands, cool from holding iced glasses, over her neck and shoulders.</p><p>But where their performance had led Claude’s mind still took Lorenz completely off guard.</p><p>“Let’s try it.”</p><p>“Oh, Goddess, no,” Lorenz objected, pushing his chair from the table with one hand, his left raised in protest, meeting Claude’s smile with a laugh.</p><p>Claude tilted his head back in a whine as he argued, “When — <b>when</b> else are we going to have an opportunity? Get up.”</p><p>Claude was already half standing, and Lorenz quickly caved. After standing, Lorenz let Claude crowd around him, and, following the flow of the music, they stepped from one foot to the other as they found the rhythm. Even without the snare drum, Lorenz swayed his fist by Claude’s hip, an unfair number of times, though Claude still did his best to follow along and oscillate towards Lorenz's teasing hand. The recreation of not-quite-what Hilda had been doing, tickled another laugh out of Claude, and Lorenz taunted, “You’ve got a false start.”</p><p>As Claude went to answer, the drum in the song sounded, and while Lorenz did his best to imitate the motion properly, Claude found himself unprepared and the four of them roared in disappointment.</p><p>“Here, here. Less full body movement,” Hilda insisted, placing her hands on the back of Claude’s shoulders and dancing her pelvis up against the curve of his ass.</p><p>Fae leaned against their table to watch and Lorenz rolled his eyes in their direction, though when he looked back to Claude, and Hilda’s hands sliding around his dance partner’s shirt and down to his hips, his expression was all tenderness and revelry. Claude and Hilda were mostly successful for the last beat in the song, and Lorenz was turning pink while a server came to take away their empty glasses as Fae gently chastised his lazy shoulder for his part in the dance move, and even though the following song didn’t quite sync up with their practice, Lorenz's lesson was dragged out at least long enough to try and get it to <em> pop </em> as much as his elbow.</p><p>Claude and Hilda traded places a few times during this process, and it was with Claude’s arms around her that they stepped away from Lorenz, cheering softly in celebration as Hilda swiveled herself in Claude’s lap to this techno song before it ended also.</p><p>Extracting herself, Hilda grabbed her jacket and forced the others to chase her back to the main floor, pulling them through a few more songs. When another slower number played, and Lorenz was drunk enough to dance with her with less reservation, his movements long and exaggerated, while Claude held Fae from behind, whispering in their ear as the pair of them teetered from side to side, Hilda decided that this would be a good time to drive them home if she wanted them to have energy for the rest of the night.</p><p> </p><p>The lights were on in the bedroom of Claude and Lorenz’s apartment, the bed unmade, the mood sanguine. Lorenz was stretched lazily across the sheet, a hand around Fae’s thigh where their dress had curled up over their hip, as he lounged, watching them kiss Claude. From Claude’s opposite side Hilda scratched gentle fingertips up his stomach, bunching up his shirt, teasing the four of them with met and broken soulmate connection more than once.</p><p>“Okay, no, no, no,” Claude laughed, sitting up.</p><p>“Ticklish?” Fae asked, and Claude widened his eyes as he smiled, standing and turning to face them.</p><p>“I mean, absolutely, <b>but</b>,” he emphasized, pointing at Hilda with one hand while touching his face and his hair with the other, “I have to go freshen up.” He leaned away from the others, as if nervous, stretching his hands out in front of himself, accusing her, “I <b>will not</b> hear you bitching about me in two days.”</p><p>“You’re my soulmate? I’ll bitch to your face,” Hilda taunted as Claude left, reaching into a top drawer of a dresser on his way out.</p><p>He'd known of other men she'd met on active dates, like dancing, and wanted to avoid their failings, really by any means necessary. It would horrify him for Hilda to think of him as comparable.</p><p>Fae snorted in amusement. “The alcohol may have stolen his subtlety, but he is still a gentleman.”</p><p>They took Hilda’s hands in theirs as they rolled atop her, kissing her as Lorenz bent his knees to pull himself across the bed. He thought for a moment of accusing Claude of not doing such a thing for him, but decided it would be rude, revealing and not altogether accurate; moods were different.</p><p>Claude returned pants-less and in fresh boxer briefs, and started a revolving door for the others to cleanse themselves, after which Lorenz was fetching them water to share, and it was when he was returning that Claude asked, “How the hell were we ever spontaneous enough to, like, fuck competitively?”</p><p>Fae accepted a glass from Lorenz and sat up, drinking as they were supported by Claude’s left arm around their back, their panties down around their knees. His right hand was in their lap, now over their dress as they swallowed, Hilda’s left hand still upon their thigh.</p><p>“It’s because you wanted to jerk me off in front of an audience,” Lorenz attested, and Fae was choking, and accidentally knocking Claude in the forehead with the base of the glass while they recovered. They were all laughing as Claude took the glass from Fae and turned to leave it on a bedside table.</p><p>“Don’t beat me,” Claude whined, rubbing his head and adjusting his hair. “It’s not even true.”</p><p>“I’m so sorry,” Fae cooed.</p><p>“It’s okay.”</p><p>“Are you okay?”</p><p>“Yeah, I’m fine,” Claude promised. His tone regained some of its tenor as he addressed Lorenz, “Asshole.” He turned back to Fae, pouting and imploring them to take his side. “I was just going to kiss him.”</p><p>Fae reached out to rub their thumb across Claude’s forehead, looking him over again for bruising. Their tongue was heavy with alcohol when they beckoned him, “Kiss <em> me</em>.”</p><p>Claude leaned into them and gasped in surprise with the return of the soulmate connection just before their lips met, Lorenz having sat back on the bed, curling his hand around Hilda’s leg. She had her right hand on Fae’s left forearm, and extended her left hand to play with the cascade of Lorenz’s hair as he leaned toward her.</p><p>Smiling, Lorenz pressed his face into the side of Hilda’s knee, leaving a wet kiss with an edge of teeth that barely touched upon her thigh. As goosebumps rose on her skin, he closed his eyes and breathed upon her damp skin as he extended his arm so that his fingertips slowly caressed down to her ankle.</p><p>Fae stretched their head up away from Claude as his mouth found their jaw and neck, his own hands reaching down to either side of their thighs, fumbling to find their panties again. He giggled with Fae as he kissed down the front of their chest, and they bent and twisted their legs towards him so their undergarments could be pulled away.</p><p>Squeezing their ankles against Claude’s hips and sides, Fae reached over his back to start taking off his shirt, which he eagerly helped with; glad when he could sit back on his heels and toss it away. There was no fear from before, and far less nervousness, as Claude hovered over them. Bowed forward, his hair parted and dangled loose in front of him, arched from how he’d styled it back, and Fae planted a foot on his chest to delay his return and admire him.</p><p>At the sound of a blissful sigh, they turned to Lorenz and Hilda, finding Hilda rolling onto her back, legs spread, one knee bent, with Lorenz having nuzzled his way under her skirt, rubbing his nose over her clothed pussy.</p><p>Lorenz slid a hand up Hilda’s thigh and soon she was moving to accommodate him, holding her undergarments aside with his thumb so he could kiss and lap at her soft lips. When Lorenz and Hilda broke apart, shuffling her skirt and underclothes down her legs, Claude wrapped his hands around Fae’s foot, and they hissed. He instantly let go, eyes wide in confusion.</p><p>“Just the straps on my shoes,” Fae explained, and Claude pouted as he leaned aside and tilted their limb to examine the extent of it. Assured they weren’t raw, he placed a kiss atop their foot and rested the appendage aside, leaning down to tangle in their arms. The soulmate connection was lost, but he luxuriated in the feeling of their hands on his neck and his chest, their lips on his mouth and his ear, as they found a different rhythm.</p><p>Slowly, Fae let their left hand let go of him as they looked over to Hilda, who was sweeping Lorenz’s hair back with both hands, his head between her legs, licking and sucking at her clit. Fae caressed the side of Hilda’s shoulder with the back of their hand, causing her to whimper and Lorenz to moan as the connection struck them again, until Claude was curling around them, his arms on their lower back as he whispered, “Sit up?”</p><p>It wasn’t a smooth motion, and by the time Claude was in a position at Fae’s side to allow them enough room to actually sit up, Lorenz and Hilda were laughing about how Lorenz had struggled, and failed, to keep his place with how the bed had bounced through their clumsiness. Hilda pressed the side of her hand to the bridge of her nose, an expression of mild exasperation, as Lorenz crawled forward. He kissed her mouth as her hand fell away, rubbing the front of her pussy with three fingers in a few quick circles before grabbing hold of her waist.</p><p>Fae was resting their hands on Claude’s shoulders while he reached around them to pull the zipper down on their dress. His head hung over their shoulder, but he knew better than to try to watch the way his hands had to work, and simply straightened his knees at times to bump his body up against theirs. Creeping his hands beneath the material, Claude massaged soft muscle and the dip in Fae's spine, scratching gentle fingertips up to the halter collar of their dress, searching for a button or a snap.</p><p>Fae reached over their shoulders, hooking their thumbs under the material as they clarified, “It’s just overhead.”</p><p>As Fae and Claude worked first the collar, and then the rest of their dress overhead, Hilda was arching up, as she found the clasp of her bra beneath herself. She rolled on her side, her back to Lorenz’s chest, so they were both facing their partners as she tossed her garment towards the end of the bed. Lorenz humped against her a little, holding his left arm around her and adjusting her loose hair with his right hand, exposing the soft, cool skin on the back of her upper arm to amorous kisses.</p><p>Adjusting himself into a seated position afterwards, Claude found himself at the base of the bed, legs bent over the side. Fae moved to his side as they let him finish undressing himself, reaching out a hand to his chest to keep him leaned back when they curved their body to kiss him again, letting their hand drip down to squeeze at the head of his cock.</p><p>They straddled one of Claude’s thighs, and he ran a hand over the bare curve of their hip, finding a sensitive squish somewhere above the thick swell of their thighs, below the tapered contour of their waistline. He reached out to grab their ass with both hands, pressing his thumbs into those responsive little points on Fae’s sides, and anticipated a laugh or a squeak of protest; not the encouraging moan he’d received.</p><p>Claude gasped in the space between their lips, surprised at holding any power over their body, and their situation. He tilted his head away from them, but Fae tilted forward, kissing his neck, and Claude barely got to look over Fae’s body to where he kneaded their backside, before his eyes fluttered closed, their warm, solid grip on his shaft pulsing as they tried to find a comfortable place to keep their arm as they undulated towards him.</p><p>Another chill wind blew in through the window, and Fae, Claude and Hilda hissed in discomfort, bringing Lorenz to giggles.</p><p>“Okay, no,” Hilda declared, rolling around and stretching to where she could close it.</p><p>“Sorry,” Lorenz whispered, about the window, feeling decidedly less apologetic about sliding his hands up the front of Hilda’s shirt as she settled back close to him.</p><p>“You’re lucky your hands aren’t fucking cold right now,” she said, voice flat, but he was still laughing softly, bold and dizzy with drink. He pinched a nipple, sliding the shirt over the swell of her chest, letting go as she moved to take it off.</p><p>Like Claude, Lorenz had changed his outfit when the opportunity had presented itself, and it was easy for him and Hilda to pull him out of a different tank top than what he’d worn at the bar and a pair of long johns.</p><p>Fae kissed Claude’s mouth a few times in parting as they moved to the floor, between his legs. They worked their warm, wet mouth down the length of his cock to his groaning approval, until he was suitably lubricated for them to stroke his shaft as they continued to suck the tip of him. They curbed their amusement when he reached out to card their hair back, holding it away from their blowjob.</p><p>They kept this up for a while, Fae with their oral affection, and Lorenz and Hilda with wandering kisses and cloying hands. Claude whimpered, and gasped when the back of Fae’s busy hand patterned in red, as their soulmark lit again.</p><p>Fae leaned away to laugh about Claude’s surprise as Lorenz and Hilda embraced him from either side, his stomach flexing as their connection was restored. Gently, Lorenz and Hilda lay Claude back, his hands slipping down to his sides, leaving Fae’s hair to fall back around them. Fae sat back on their heels and used both hands to pump at Claude’s erection as they watched Hilda lean over Claude to kiss him, and Lorenz left the bed to gather condoms.</p><p>“Alright, come here,” Lorenz instructed, guiding Hilda, at first gently, a hand in hers, and then with voracious, lustful force, his left arm around her waist, his right hand directing her limbs and her back. Hilda was pretty sure she had the strength to twist Lorenz into more compromising positions than what he was currently imploring of her, but she squeaked happily anyway, enjoying playing the waif.</p><p>She found herself on all fours, more or less, knees bent and barely spread over Claude’s face so that it would be an effort on his part if he wanted to lean his mouth up to her body, her forearms resting on Claude’s lower stomach and right thigh to support her weight; she would barely have had to move an inch or two for her and Claude to sixty-nine. Instead, she kissed Fae as they rolled their wrist, churning a careful grip on the head of Claude’s cock.</p><p>“Oh, fuck,” Claude whined. “Hey, hey, hey,” he warned, panting heavily, met with a mix of relief and anticipation when Fae let him go, placing both of their hands on his thighs as they smiled with Hilda.</p><p>Claude wrapped his hands around Hilda’s thighs, more as a matter of security than a matter of massage, though his thumbs rolled and his grip pulsed as he was tortured by sense and fantasy, laying in wait of Lorenz.</p><p>“Are you good like this?” Lorenz asked Hilda, running his hands up and down her back as he moved up behind her.</p><p>Hilda lowered her face for a moment, blushing. “Yeah,” she promised.</p><p>“And you, sweetheart?” Lorenz confirmed, stroking his left hand across Claude’s forehead.</p><p>“Oh yeah,” Claude answered, eyebrows askew in wonder.</p><p>“Okay,” Lorenz agreed, smiling wider when he made eye contact with Fae. It was a marvel to be overtaken by the ludicrous, libidinous moment he’d built; friendship and heartache just as much a part of it as celebration and desire.</p><p>Hilda had to spread her legs as Lorenz pressed his condom-clad cock against her silken lips to give him room. He sank himself inside of her less than halfway in case someone protested, but the slow, cautious pace gave Claude room to be bold, and he extended his neck to press his tongue against the front of Hilda’s pussy. It was an awkward angle, but the warbling sigh that followed her squeak of surprise was encouraging, and Claude bobbed his head to lap at her a few times before Lorenz took pace.</p><p>Fae’s face fell in sexual sympathy as Hilda moaned, and they adjusted her long pink hair over her right shoulder as they surged forward to kiss her cheek and upon her ear. They stroked her neck as they continued pumping at Claude with their left hand.</p><p>“You’re so hot,” Fae vowed, whispering in Hilda’s ear, holding her as they nodded at Lorenz, assuring him too as he slowed again, reveling in the complete euphoria of it all.</p><p>His hands on her waist, Lorenz planted his left foot on the bed, adjusting their positioning so that he could keep up his pistoning. He surprised himself with a squawk of a moan that tripped out of him, and he might have expected the others tease him over it, but Hilda was simply hiccupping her pleasure as she squeezed at the head of Claude’s cock, and Fae, though out of sight, was busy too, leaving open mouthed kisses on Claude’s thighs; while Claude had been the source of Lorenz’s outburst, having extended his tongue so the base of the tip of it pressed against Hilda’s clit, and the expanse of the muscle cushioned Lorenz’s balls on each inward thrust.</p><p>Claude couldn’t hold the position, and made a final effort to wiggle his tongue against Hilda. The muscles of his neck cooled and eased as Claude settled back into the bed, practically purring as Fae went back to licking his cock.</p><p>The soulmate connection was inescapable for the next few minutes; moans, gasps and curses filling the room as the lovers kissed and fucked.</p><p>Hilda was quivering, flexing and relaxing the muscles in her ass and thighs, her enthusiasm influencing the depth and pace Lorenz was able to manage. Lowering her shoulders, Hilda arched her ass back towards him, and after a few more thrusts, he took this lull between her orgasms to leave her wanting.</p><p>“Don’t worry. I’ll — just a minute,” Lorenz pledged as Hilda whined. With a soft laugh, Lorenz shifted his foot back so that he could find Claude with his eyes, his soulmate’s expression flashing from dazed to joyful.</p><p>“Hi,” Claude said, stupidly, sliding his hands down around Hilda’s thighs.</p><p>Lorenz shook his head, scratching his left hand across Claude’s chin and facial hair before he huffed, “Open your fucking mouth.”</p><p>Claude thought about cursing, but there wasn’t room to do more than smile and comply as Lorenz led his cock to Claude’s parted lips. It was slow at first, shallow and teasing, as Claude’s puckered lips chased the head of Lorenz’s cock as he’d pull away, but then Lorenz was leaning forward as he had when he’d been fucking Hilda, propelling more of himself into the wet haven of Claude’s mouth.</p><p>Unburdened, Hilda was free to play with Fae, and soon there was nothing for Claude but the taste and sense of sex, with Lorenz in his mouth and Fae and Hilda’s tongues pressing upon either side of his cock, taking turns wrapping him in the warmth of their lips.</p><p>A few minutes passed, Lorenz thought, maybe, time and pleasure never quite getting along, and he straightened himself away from Claude to ask Hilda, “Do you want me to grab a new condom?”</p><p>“Uh? Yeah,” Hilda agreed, nodding. She rolled to her side, off of Claude, when Lorenz shifted away towards the bedside table, and he looked back to her as if worried, but Hilda was smiling as she shook her head as she clarified, “And I’m moving.”</p><p>“Good idea,” Fae agreed, rolling their neck as they stood and stepped one knee onto the bed as they reached out to Lorenz. “And give me one?”</p><p>Claude stole the condom from Fae afterwards and there was a tussle and tumble in the bed as they kissed and argued, falsely, about how they wanted to be, Claude winning out on hunching over them, unsatisfied with the prospect of returning to his back, and wanting to see their face; at least this first time. Fae lay on their back, close to the head of the bed so that they could turn to look Hilda in the eye, back on her knees and facing her partners as Lorenz fucked her to their mutual exhaustion.</p><p>Claude and Fae were slower, and quieter, for the most part, spending much of their time admiring their partners, but also indulging Claude’s slow, romantic kisses, his curious and uncertain touches. Fae blushed, fond and infatuated with their friend and soulmate, their lover, their boyfriend. They loved him, and that included the way he slid his hands over their arms and kissed from their bicep to their breast, how he obeyed direction to press a spit-slick thumb to their clit as he thrust between their legs, how he'd needed no direction but approval, to hold their knees together, somewhere between their chests, as he sped and let them chase their peak after Lorenz and Hilda.</p><p> </p><p>They made another round of clean up, Hilda going last to shower and change, needing the longest to recover from perfect, trembling bliss.</p><p>She returned to find Fae wrapped around Lorenz’s right side, their legs tangled together, Claude spooning Fae from behind.</p><p>“You need a bigger bed,” Hilda scolded as she sat upon the corner.</p><p>“We need a bigger room,” Lorenz attested, “with chairs and all. Are you going to put on moisturizer?”</p><p>Hilda furrowed her brow in accusation, raising her palms.</p><p>“You look beautiful,” Lorenz insisted, rolling his eyes so that it almost appeared insincere, “but if you are, then I’m going to grab ours.”</p><p>“Oh,” she giggled. “Yeah, sure.”</p><p>After Hilda collected her bag, they spread out to sit across the bed, grooming and talking about the night, what they’d enjoyed and other date nights, ideas for next time; finally whispering declarations of love, and lamentations of the distance of their one foot wall, and separating for sleep.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Okay so maybe the dancing scene isn't beyond reproach (and they should have drank more), and maybe some more details were needed in the intimacy (I'm thinking: internal thoughts, motivations, descriptors of bed sheets, etc.). But. I have been anticipating this chapter for a long time. Far longer than when I first posted <a href="https://omgkalyppso.tumblr.com/post/626907625767993344/id-art-of-characters-from-fire-emblem-three">that art I drew</a> on my tumblr two months ago! I would have only linked to the art I drew but I figure some people aren't reading notes or following links and I wanted to show it off. Let me know if it's a Huge Problem and I'll try to resize it.</p><p>Also! My friend drew a <a href="https://crxwes.tumblr.com/post/632027961751633920/for-omgkalyppso-read-their-fic-in-which-hilda">chibi Hilda in her dress from the dance club.</a></p><p>Speaking of which, I have not been to a club since 2012, and at the time I would not have known the music. I think I've decided this fic is set in 2015, and ... forgive me if I got the culture, mood, etc. wrong. I made <a href="https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5PYrzNiKhRUTRj6nQwgZZg?si=p9ucd6G8R9uVPyR2VwGQGg">a playlist</a> to get myself in the mindset to write this chapter (the club, not the intimacy) (yes, I know this isn't club music) (this is meant to be listened to on shuffle). And here are three of many dance videos that inspired descriptions and the general mood for the dance floor: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Uzuluh4cmQ">the motor dance move</a>, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oqn8FgEBKMg">lorenz drunk slow dancing</a>, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UXAdlaUhrlE">the latin beat</a>.</p><p>Oh! And 2 friends asked, so Yes. That is a Hamlet quote on Lorenz's tank top.</p><p>Hope you enjoyed it, and that I'm still true to the story since this is 2 months since my last update to this fic. I'd love a kudos or comment.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0030"><h2>30. Regular 'Couple' Things</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>trigger warnings for: strained parental relationships, previous parental death</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Claude made breakfast Saturday, leaving Lorenz to sleep in, and Hilda to crawl in after him. Fae had already left for work, and Claude texted them, at first just to wish them a good day, but then to tease about what they were missing out on, sending photos of shakshuka and of Lorenz and Hilda in the hallway, him flipping off the camera while she hid her face, both still disheveled from sleep.</p><p>Fed, dressed and prepared to face the public, Hilda soon left to spend the day with her brother. Claude and Lorenz moved more slowly, cleaning and cuddling while they conversed about their friends and soulmates. They accepted a last minute invitation to Raphael’s for dinner, and spent the evening with him interrupting his grandparents, to keep them from offering thanks, while they gossiped and watched television with Maya and Ignatz.</p><p>Sunday was spent apart and in housekeeping; laundry, at least, being something that Fae and Hilda insisted upon doing in their own homes. The soulmates started using a chat service instead of texting when Fae’s phone refused to accommodate a texting group chat, and messaged each other throughout the day.</p><p>Fae, Claude and Lorenz mostly spent their time in solo hobbies: video games, reading, writing, while Hilda worked her apartment to an acceptable level of upkeep so that she could go destress with Marianne. She sat and sketched her friend’s parakeets while talking out the ongoing and impending changes in her life, only blushing a little when Linhardt and Leonie started offering advice. Hilda appreciated that Marianne asked before suggesting solutions, and wasn’t always prepared for how goal-oriented the other two could be about their friends’ problems.</p><p> </p><p>It was late when Fae suggested calling their partners, resulting in Claude and Lorenz rushing around their apartment looking for earbuds while Fae and Hilda settled in.</p><p>Fae lay in bed, propped up in a pile of pillows. Their sleeping space was finally clear of folded laundry, and their laptop nearby, paused at the credits of The Count of Monte Cristo. Hilda sat on her couch, swaddled in a thick wool blanket, a mug of tea cooling on the table, feeling strangely nervous about the call.</p><p>“Heyyy,” Fae greeted when Hilda joined the chat, rolling their eyes at themselves afterwards where no one could see them, sitting up straighter in case that helped with their voice.</p><p>“Hiiii,” Hilda sang back. “How are you?”</p><p>“I’m good.” Fae let their expression relax. “I’m not keeping you up, am I? I know it’s late.”</p><p>“No,” Hilda giggled. “I still have a whole mug of tea to forget before I go to sleep.”</p><p>Although Fae smiled, they worried more seriously, “Then you are getting ready for bed?”</p><p>“No, I’m just, sitting by the television.”</p><p>“What are you watching?”</p><p>“Don’t laugh,” Hilda whined.</p><p>“Cross my heart,” Fae promised.</p><p>“I like the fireplace channels that pop up at this time of year.”</p><p>“That’s cute,” Fae said without inflection, sincere and smitten, and silently thinking of Hilda’s habits that might be teased as being for a woman three times her age, the crafting, the tea, and, apparently, the television programming.</p><p>Hilda groaned a noise of annoyance and embarrassment, and Fae chuckled.</p><p>“I’m serious. Does it remind you of something or is just pretty? It’s allowed to just be pretty,” Fae suggested.</p><p>“I guess … I guess I hadn’t thought about it,” Hilda conceded as the call blooped, “but it does remind me of my brother.”</p><p>“Hello soulmates,” Claude greeted, interrupting. “What reminds you of your brother?”</p><p>“Hi.”</p><p>“Hey, hon’. Fire does. We used to go camping,” Hilda clarified.</p><p>Claude wheezed a little. “Holy Gods, and you <b>hated</b> it.”</p><p>“Oh yeah. At the time I wouldn’t shut up about the bugs, or the mud, or the temperature,” Hilda readily agreed. “But in retrospect … it was nice.” She nearly snapped, “Don’t get it twisted, if you suggest we go camping, I’ll leave you off at the closest hotel. It’s just, sitting around a fire for a few hours could be nice?”</p><p>“You’re going to hate my dad’s place <b>so much</b>,” Fae groaned.</p><p>Between Hilda’s threat and Fae’s lament, Claude was half laughing. “Is it infested?”</p><p>“Noooo,” Fae whined. “But it could be ‘like camping.’ He has both an electric stove and a woodburning one.” The call blooped again. “We could definitely have a fire.”</p><p>“Two minutes alone and you’re plotting arson?” Lorenz balked.</p><p>“Camping,” Claude amended.</p><p>“Eugh. That’s worse,” he teased, chuckling.</p><p>“Right?” Hilda confirmed, high-pitched and vindicated.</p><p>“Not <em> camping </em> ,” Fae insisted. “<em>‘Like camping’ </em> at my dad’s very rural home. Burning outside would be hard to do in winter, but there’s a wood stove indoors that he’ll definitely let us use. It supplements his baseboard heating anyway.”</p><p>“That sounds unsafe?” Lorenz said, sounding unsure of himself.</p><p>“How?” Claude prompted.</p><p>Lorenz sighed as if he were thinking, and Fae contributed. “It’s fine, there’s no gas in the place.” They adjusted their tone to reflect their joy about Lorenz’s arrival as they added, “Hello, by the way.”</p><p>“Hiiii, Lorenz,” Hilda supplied.</p><p>“Hi Lorenz,” Claude needled.</p><p>“Hello,” he answered, bashful about the attention. “It’s good to hear your voices. How do I sound? These earbuds haven’t been used in months.”</p><p>“You sound clear,” Hilda assured him.</p><p>“Like yourself,” Fae agreed. “Yeah, I didn’t want to just do text today, so thank you, for talking with me.”</p><p>The voices rolled over each other as they insisted that speaking together was welcome, that Fae was welcome to ask for attention, that they needed it too. Somehow the conversation looped back to the ugliest insects they’d seen, while camping or otherwise, a useless topic that had Hilda whining and laughing between mouthfuls of tea that Fae occasionally checked in on as not being forgotten. It was silly, and not-altogether-romantic, and domestic in a way that had Fae homesick for a time that didn’t yet exist and a place that might never be, where they lived together, comfortably, with space and understanding. It was feeling more unusual lately to go to bed alone than otherwise.</p><p> </p><p>Monday afternoon Fae collected Lorenz and Ignatz at the end of their day, and Lorenz looked more stressed than he had the previous week, if that were possible. Fae assured Ignatz that driving him home was an easy favor that they would offer as long as they could, and filled their ride with chatter until Ignatz was saying his goodbyes.</p><p>“I,” Lorenz stammered when they were alone, “I could get a cab.”</p><p>Even with them having agreed to stay with their SUV, Lorenz was wary of having Fae anywhere near his father’s home; though he’d have felt no better at the prospect of Claude driving him, worse probably.</p><p>“Let me get you closer,” Fae answered, surprising him. They started their ride. “I’ll get us to the south end, and if you really don’t want me there, I’ll find a coffee shop where I can wait for you. Then you won’t have to spend like sixty dollars on a ride.”</p><p>Lorenz was quiet, save for a sigh; touched that they were neither frustrated with his indecision, nor fighting him on the subject. He had worried they’d suggest that he couldn’t go alone, and that inherently he would know they were right, but the idea that they’d support him going alone was encouraging. He nodded, and relaxed when he saw that Fae had noticed, directing a soft smile his way.</p><p>Fae’s phone vibrated in the cupholder at the same time as Lorenz’s phone made a noise like two peals of a wind chime, and Fae left their phone be, sure it was their shared chat and that Lorenz would advise them if it were anything important.</p><p><b>Claude (4:07 PM):</b> :spinning hearts emoji: :heart and arrow emoji: :shining heart emoji: you must be on your way by now? thinking of you</p><p>Lorenz pouted, feeling silly. He felt that, as an adult, the other adults in his life should worry less about him confronting his father; especially since he was trying to convince himself that his father’s desire for reconnection could be a good thing. Before he could gather himself enough to answer, Hilda’s message popped up.</p><p><b>Hilda (4:08 PM):</b> you’re okay. Don’t let him keep you longer than an hour</p><p>“Any news?” asked Fae.</p><p>“Just, wishing us well.”</p><p><b>Lorenz (4:11 PM):</b> Thank you both. :heartpulse emoji: I know he’ll try, but I wouldn’t do that to Fae. I’ll be alright. Message you after.</p><p> </p><p>In the end, Lorenz gave Fae the directions without further hesitation, and they listened as Lorenz awkwardly recounted being driven to school, not by his father, and then even more awkwardly detailed driving himself to school after he turned seventeen. It was then that he really started to <em>accept </em>that something was wrong with the wealth disparity between him and his friends, not that he couldn’t see it before.</p><p>Worried Lorenz’s need to justify himself was triggering a discomfort he was about to carry with him into his father’s home, Fae did their best to gently change the subject. However it was hard not to fixate as they passed large, landscaped properties with grand houses, often with obvious third-stories; like no home Fae had ever been inside, which would remain true even after this trip, they supposed.</p><p>“A left up here.” Lorenz interrupted what Fae was saying about computers and they fell into silence.</p><p>“The first or the second one?”</p><p>“The second.”</p><p>There was an open gate at the end of the drive, and space to park in front of the four-car garage. The building looked as though it could house as many families, and Fae shifted uncomfortably to think of the bitter widower who kept residence alone.</p><p>“I’ll be right back,” Lorenz said, sounding as though he sought to convince himself. “With luck, I—”</p><p>“Lorenz. I’ll be fine. I’ll be here.” They reached out and took hold of his left hand. Gratefully, he ran first his fingers and then his nails over their muted soulmark.</p><p>“Right,” he agreed. He swallowed his nerves and his thanks for the moment, hoping there would be a better time for that later, and nodded before making his way out of the vehicle.</p><p> </p><p>Lorenz had a key — he’d brought his key — but he found himself floundering on the front step, wondering whether he should let himself in, or ring, or knock, or call. There was something so familiar about letting himself in, in acknowledging his … not residence, but association with the building and his father, even if it was more subtle than announcing his arrival another way.</p><p><em> ‘It’s just a door. It’s </em> <b><em>just</em></b><em> a door.’ </em></p><p>Quick about it, <em> ‘Like tearing off a bandaid,’ </em> Lorenz pulled the key from his pocket, unlocked the door, and stepped inside.</p><p>Lorenz said a silent prayer of thanks that the entrance was dark and there was no one to be immediately surprised by him bursting in. He brought a hand to his chest and tapped his fingertips against himself a few times through a long sigh, and then shuffled any lingering snow from his boots.</p><p>Glancing around, he found a nearby bench, hidden by coats hanging on the wall. His footstep felt loud on the tiled floor as he went to sit and slip out of his boots. The act was habitual, but also the result of prudence and anxiety over the prospect of ruining a carpet with wet shoes.</p><p>Hunched over his knees, Lorenz took another breath, and inhaled the smells of salt, sweat, snowmelt and wet leather; all things his father left in the hands of others: maintaining the driveway, laundry, the upkeep of shoes and jackets. These things he wouldn’t have begrudged his father, if it didn’t feel like the lives of others balanced on every convenience and accessibility.</p><p>“Lorenz.”</p><p>The impulse was there, to grab his boots while he was still hunkered down, to admit to himself and everyone that he had regressed, and to leave from whence he came, but Lorenz ignored it, repressed it. He swallowed hard, and raised himself up with a casual smile.</p><p>“As expected, I hope?” Lorenz said by way of greeting.</p><p>His father hurried down the hall towards him, pocketing his phone. “Well yes of course. You didn’t have to sit in the dark though.” He clicked on the overhead light, and smiled. “There we are. Now I can see you.”</p><p>Standing, Lorenz found he did feel better in the light, looking down at his father; even with his height inherited from his side of the family, it marked another difference between them.</p><p>“It is good to see you home,” his father went on. “It’s early for dinner, but I could—”</p><p>“My ride’s waiting,” Lorenz said quickly, and frowned when he saw the recognition in his father’s eyes; of course he’d known that.</p><p>“Is Claude here?” His father lowered an arm he’d been gesturing with.</p><p><b> <em>‘Lie,’</em> </b>Lorenz screamed at himself, but he couldn’t quite manage it.</p><p>Nervously, he rubbed his thumb on the side of his index finger. “Why do you ask?”</p><p>“Well, while <em>he </em>would refuse the invitation, if it is anyone else, you could invite them in?”</p><p>“No,” Lorenz answered while his father was still finishing his question, unable to mask the horror in his tone, but this just made his father look mournful, pleading.</p><p>“Or send them away?” he suggested.</p><p>Lorenz stretched his arms down in a quick moment of tension, to dismiss his instinctive reaction; he wondered why he’d let himself believe that he could have set terms for this visit. He pressed his hands into his pockets, and ran a fingertip over the edge of his worry stone. “I’m just … here for the photos.”</p><p>“I think your friends would understand, you know,” his father pressed, though he turned aside as if he were preparing to lead Lorenz along. “That even if you’ve grown to hate your father, that I can … I can still remember her with you.”</p><p>“I don’t hate you,” Lorenz groaned, unsure whether it was true.</p><p>The sentence perked up his father anyway.</p><p>“I’m glad to hear it. I was thinking that you could still love my memories of your mother, if nothing else; but it is good to hear you still love me.”</p><p>Lorenz didn’t correct him, even as his father’s chortle scratched at his senses. He was simply relieved to be moving, the pile of boxes in the open dining room promising an end to this interaction.</p><p>“You know that I still love you, yes?” The question took Lorenz off-guard, as did his father’s stance, head tilted as if he were sharing a secret. It hurt that this had hardly felt true, and Lorenz didn’t think it ever would again. “I’ve tried to protect you. To provide…”</p><p>Lorenz let himself blink long and slow to keep from rolling his eyes. “Where are you going with this?”</p><p>“Look me in the eyes.”</p><p>“I have been.”</p><p>“No. Look,” his father insisted, and it was quickly apparent that he wasn’t pleading for Lorenz to see something in him, but the other way around. Yet what Lorenz saw was an old, paranoid, lonely man who’d been closing his heart a little more each year since before Lorenz had been born. His father’s latest accusation did nothing to undercut the disappointment Lorenz had felt in that moment. “Do you think you’ve found your soulmate?”</p><p>The insult of not being asked whether he’d found his soulmate, but if he <em>thought </em>he had was so unexpected that Lorenz scoffed.</p><p>“You do?” his father concluded, aghast and concerned, leaning forward and raising his hands towards Lorenz’s shoulders. “When I’d seen those stories online I’d wondered whether it was a ruse the four of you were putting together, to dissuade others from finding you, but if they’ve fooled you, Lorenz I—”</p><p>“I am <b>not</b> being fooled.”</p><p>Lorenz hesitated. His body was tense, but not enough to pull away. He was repulsed, but not enough to argue that simply because a social media app called something a story didn’t mean it was a tabloid to be consumed, to articulate that his father was once again overstepping boundaries and assuming his ignorance. “Why could you not even suppose for a moment that my life—” <em>‘Doesn’t look like yours. Isn’t what you wanted.’ </em>“—has been blessed? That <em>something,</em> against all odds, has gone right for me?”</p><p>“This sort of thing doesn’t happen,” his father asserted, not without merit.</p><p>“It did. It has.” Lorenz could see how his father was holding back, and could deduce the rest. <em>‘If this sort of thing happens, it happens to the immoral and degenerate. Not to his heir.’ </em></p><p>“Lorenz, I don’t know why you can’t see how people would take advantage of you.”</p><p>“As if I have anything to offer besides eight boxes of photographs.”</p><p>Lorenz wished he could carry out more than two at a time, but the boxes were old, and he couldn’t imagine the reaction he’d have if he slipped in the snow and sent them scattering. His father offered to help, but Lorenz had snapped at him, and then let him watch in silence as he moved them to the door before refitting his boots and taking them out to Fae’s SUV.</p><p>They popped the trunk and exited the vehicle to stand next to it, and Lorenz felt ashamed as he hissed quietly, “Fae. Please. Get back in the car. I don’t want him watching us.”</p><p>Fae hadn’t meant to do anything other than comply, but found themselves looking back at the house, and catching eye-contact with the man in the doorway. They nodded at Lorenz, but he was looking at the ground as if defeated, and Fae swallowed, nervous and apologetic, as they returned to the driver’s seat.</p><p>His father called to him as he stood with the last of the boxes in arms and Lorenz looked at him with his full attention.</p><p>“I’d wanted this to be a good day for us.”</p><p>Lorenz sighed. “I could tell.”</p><p>The following silence was awkward. Lorenz was rather certain his father didn’t know how to apologize in general, let alone how to apologize for this.</p><p>“I … I know this won’t make this evening better, but I do have a request,” Lorenz confessed, feeling all of the blood in his heart.</p><p>“Yes?” His father’s answer was eager, and the prospect of asking his father for anything made Lorenz feel sick, even when what he was asking for was respect.</p><p>“Stop investigating me. Please. Please don’t try to intuit what’s going on in my life by looking at my friends’ and partners’ online profiles.” His father looked offended, but Lorenz still finished his appeal. “Just <em>ask </em>me, and, if I should tell you that something is none of your business … please trust that.”</p><p>“I—”</p><p>“Just say yes.”</p><p>“Lorenz, I—”</p><p>But being denied, Lorenz turned to leave, relieved that there was a cold wind to bite the heat from his face, and that there was distance he could put between himself and his father.</p><p> </p><p>Fae waited until they were on the highway before speaking. The tension hadn’t melted out of Lorenz’s posture, but at least here they didn’t feel compelled to reach out to touch him. They wanted to offer comfort, and were feeling helpless, considering how closed off Lorenz was.</p><p>“Is the silence good for you? Would you rather the radio? Or conversation?”</p><p>“Fae?” With the question, Lorenz stretched his legs, pulling himself out of his thoughts as much as the physical slump he’d been in.</p><p>“Yes?” They were skeptical, and worried that they’d interrupted him too soon.</p><p>“Thank you for driving me.”</p><p>Fae looked at Lorenz in confusion before looking back to the road. He continued, “You didn’t have to, and, much as I’m … distracted, I’m glad you’re here.”</p><p>Grimacing, Fae assured him, “Then I’m glad to be here. You’re welcome?”</p><p>“We’ve been spending so much time together lately, even as I’ve known you for years, and of course things are different <em> now </em>... I’m just thinking about what I know about you, the partner I should know the least. And I think I know you, and that you’re kind, and generous with your friends. You could give Claude a run for his money in regards to keeping a schedule and having a series of backup plans. You’ve let Hilda lead you through her hobbies, and been so gentle with her insecurities.”</p><p>Lorenz swallowed, “And I’m thinking of your green thumb, and the music in your apartment, and the fears you’ll admit to, and the ones you won’t.”</p><p>Seeing Lorenz relax in his rambling, Fae stuck out their tongue at him, feeling both cherished and embarrassed by what they thought was a diversion.</p><p>“And my father says he loves me,” he said, and Fae’s smile fell away, but Lorenz’s stayed, despite the mournful look in his eyes. “And I don’t want to love as he does. Blind. Either he doesn’t even know me, or he can’t admit he doesn’t even <em> like </em> me. If he met me as a stranger; a bi, polyamorous man in the lowest possible position of what is basically a service industry, who writes poetry in private and not for profit, who sees <b>his</b> wealth as blood money and does not want it—” Lorenz hid his eyes in his hands, sighing as he slid his fingertips to his chin.</p><p>“I had started to hope that him showing up at the apartment was how he was expressing care, but … it was just more of the same.”</p><p>“I’m sorry, Lorenz,” Fae said softly. “For what it’s worth, I’m really grateful for you. For how you love and who you are … I love you.” </p><p>Lorenz pouted, and failed to start a sentence three times though he opened his mouth. When he did collect himself enough to speak, it was after a sob burst past his lips. “I might cry the rest of the way.”</p><p>“That’s okay. We’ll be home soon.”</p><p>The lines on the road were lost in the frost and snow. There was definitely only supposed to be three lanes here, but people were driving as if there were four, and while Fae focused on driving, Lorenz messaged Claude and Hilda again.</p><p> </p><p>The apartment had a communal dolly, so they were able to get the boxes up in a single trip, and Lorenz’s mood started to change as soon as he and Fae were arguing about who would handle which tasks in the kitchen. They had baked tofu wraps and seasoned fries plated by the time Hilda and Claude arrived, and ate while discussing Lorenz’s stressful visit.</p><p>Hilda and Claude had all their online content private and protected, as much as they could, knowing how easily it could be accessed through the nature of their work. They easily deduced that it was probably through Ignatz’s online presence that Lorenz’s father had found them out, not that they’d been particularly subtle.</p><p>There wasn’t even a call now for more privacy. Simply an awareness for what could be.</p><p>With Lorenz’s permission, Claude lifted the lid on the first box, which prompted Lorenz to look inside the others. Most of them were already organized, which Lorenz felt silly for not anticipating. Two or three photo albums with the year written in pen and taped to the front, sat neatly inside the boxes with a few stray photographs of varying size pressed up against the side. Only two boxes were a mess of photos, some intact and others snipped away at, presumably to fit inside frames and wallets.</p><p>Three albums were pulled from the first box, and Fae suggested they start four piles of photos: yes - with family, Lorenz or his mother, yes - with strangers, maybe - with Lorenz, and maybe - with strangers; leaving any photos they didn’t need to keep around inside their albums, to be safely stored together.</p><p>Lorenz asked to start with the more sober albums, the most recent years, when his mother would have been in her decline. One such album had no photos of her at all, and when they finally did find a photo of her, he was surprised that the others were ready to cry with him, it was an instant keep, for the yes pile, as unflattering as it may have been, frail and black-eyed with tubes by her bedside, <em> that was her, </em> and maybe the last photo of his mother.</p><p>It made it easier to go back in time, even with occasional hospital photos, as most were at home or out in the world. As stories and memories began to flow, Lorenz’s partners felt more comfortable in cooing over and teasing old school uniforms, over-enthusiastic smiles with missing teeth, and strange stuffed animals.</p><p>They reached an album that had photos of just after Lorenz’s birth, and it was hard to imagine that his father had these moments in memory, of trading a newborn and a camera to appease the tired woman in bed. Lorenz had previously had to ignore that almost any photos of him and his mother together were taken by the man, but that the last two boxes of photographs would chronicle something of his parent’s time together before his presence, the others easily conceded when he asked to leave them, unable to stomach it.</p><p>“I want more photos of us,” Claude declared by way of distraction. Hilda and Lorenz groaned in protest.</p><p>“I’ve been crying all day,” Lorenz whined.</p><p>“Tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow,” Hilda pleaded.</p><p>“I, <em>personally,</em> looked at exactly zero of these photos with concern about how clear anyone’s skin was,” Claude argued. “Please?”</p><p>“Come here, sweetheart,” Fae beckoned, letting Claude take one photo of them alone, and then laughing with him as he struggled to get a selfie of the pair of them.</p><p>Claude was laughing harder as Fae tried to get a photo of him, and discovering either their hands or their eyes were unsteady, but this encouraged Hilda to come help and for Lorenz to indulge them, so that they were piled on and around either side of the couch, to satisfy a few clicks of Claude’s phone.</p><p> </p><p>The ‘maybe’ piles were so small that Claude simply set away all of the chosen photos for him to scan the following day. As Claude approached the kitchen, where Fae was washing mugs and glasses in the sink, playing music on their phone, he caught sight of Lorenz and Hilda whispering a goodnight at the end of the hall; her going to shower and him going to bed.</p><p>“Thank you,” Claude murmured, “for going with him.” Fae gave him a skeptic smile and he said, more seriously, “He wouldn’t have wanted me there, and, even if things were different, I don’t think he’d have asked Hilda either. It worked out well that you just had time but…”</p><p>“But it’s not up to you to thank me,” Fae insisted, their hands dried, moving up to hug Claude. “He did already.”</p><p>“Good,” Claude agreed, kissing their forehead and shifting away from their embrace, wanting to be able to see them. “How are you doing?”</p><p>“I’m good with looking at photos,” Fae promised, used to people tripping over concerns of their late mother.</p><p>“I know Lorenz can be … intense? Passionate?” Claude snickered sadly. “When he’s had to face his father before. I was worried he might say something to upset you, but I didn’t want to warn in advance in case nothing happened and—”</p><p>“He was fine. He and I are fine. Ask him about it, but … while it was a bad day for him and his father, I think it’s been a good day overall, for the four of us.” Their smile widened as though exaggerating nervousness as they confessed, “Can’t wait to meet Hilda’s family Thursday.”</p><p>Claude chuckled, sincere in his amusement. “You’re really banging out the first impressions, aren’t you?”</p><p>“Ugh!” Fae laughed. “For better or worse, I guess.”</p><p> </p><p>Claude kissed them goodnight, and voiced an open invitation for them and Hilda, leaving his bedroom door open. Lorenz repeated and reevaluated his frustrations with his father before Claude could find an opening to ask about Fae, and the normalcy of it was a relief; their little shared universe and gossip. Their conversation wound down in time for Fae and Hilda’s arrival,  and that was a relief too, to spend silence with their soulmates in arms. Claude broke the connection when the others had fallen asleep, and felt only the slightest anguish when he left them there, retreating to the guest room alone.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I thought I was going to have Lorenz forgive his father, but this felt more natural. My current outline is not for Lorenz's father to show up again, but we'll see, I guess!</p><p>Hope catharsis was felt by the end of the chapter rather than just stress. &lt;3</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0031"><h2>31. A Peek Behind The Curtain</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>trigger warnings for: racism / implicit judgement or expectations of cultural non-monogamy, misgendering, strained parental relationships, xenophobia</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Hilda’s parents had a house in the far east end, with a finished basement that her brother had taken over years ago. He was preparing to take care of their parents, aging and ailing as they were. Hilda had worried about leaving him behind when she’d first moved out, but he’d encouraged her through it, and insisted he was grateful to be inheriting the house, worrying equally about her.</p><p>Compulsion, more than love, had influenced the frequency of her visits, but today had felt different, sort of.</p><p>Her parents had been … judgmental about her hunt for her soulmate, and … rude about the resolution of her search. Hilda was happy to claim influence over her family when habitually fibbing about a delay in meeting her parents, as her family felt relatively normal compared to Claude and Lorenz’s circumstances, it was just bad luck that they were disappointed, disgusted, and downright unreasonable. She had taken the time to talk to them, hard as that had been, and with Holst’s help had built up their parents’ expectations and developed the environment Hilda was leading her soulmates into.</p><p>She hadn’t warned them, assuring herself there was nothing to forewarn; especially with Claude already <em> aware </em> of them. Her parents would be awkward and polite, little different than the behaviour she’d asked of her soulmates. It should only be two hours or so, and hopefully not long enough for her parents to say anything too insensitive.</p><p> </p><p>“This is it,” Hilda announced for Fae, as she pulled them up next to the driveway, Lorenz and Claude in his car behind them.</p><p>“It’s nice,” Fae said politely, barely looking at the building, yellow and brown wood panel siding, white tasseled curtains in the windows. Much as Hilda was trying to hide it, they, just as Claude and Lorenz, weren’t ignorant to Hilda’s nervousness. Unlike their partners however, Fae didn’t know what might inspire that uneasiness, and decided to try and approach it in a roundabout way.</p><p>Parked, Hilda was adjusting her lip balm. “Hilda?”</p><p>“Mm?”</p><p>“This is the most makeup I’ve ever seen you wear—”</p><p>She looked at Fae in horror. “Is it obvious?”</p><p>“No, Hilda,” Fae groaned, trying to sound reassuring. “I’ve never seen you wear so much makeup to make it look as if you weren’t wearing any.”</p><p>Hilda breathed a sigh, but she hardly looked relieved. She closed her eyes, soft at first and then in a wince as she nodded in answer, signaling an unspoken message about performance and flaws.</p><p>“Should I—?” Fae began.</p><p>“No,” Hilda said quickly. “Your chapstick’s fine.” She was shaking her head as she slouched into her seat. “I wouldn’t ask you to do that.” With a smile, Hilda started exiting her vehicle and added, “Anyway, you’re gorgeous. They couldn’t handle you in makeup.”</p><p>“What was that?” Claude asked, walking up behind her.</p><p>“They couldn’t handle you in makeup,” Hilda echoed, pouting as she teased him. She giggled about Claude’s reaction.</p><p>“Few can,” he agreed, stopping himself halfway into a lean, as if to kiss her forehead, the limitations on their intimacy more readily in his mind at her parents’ place than they had been at his own. He extended his hand so that she rolled her eyes at him as she led the way. Claude looked over his shoulder, and winked at Lorenz, who looked sympathetic.</p><p> </p><p>Hilda opened the front door to a small foyer that was open to a long open hallway, immediately revealing the interior, and the smell of cooking garlic. The baseboards were wooden, like the floors, a medium brown that gave the home a sturdy, antique feeling. Around them, and leading up the stairs, the walls were dark green, but at the far end of the hall they could see the living room with sandy walls and wood accented furniture, where her parents sat under the light of a tiffany style lamp.</p><p>“There’s my baby!”</p><p>“Hi Mom. Hi Dad,” Hilda called, helping her partners inside and to a nearby bench that was really an itchy lawn sofa so they could remove their boots. Her father barely turned his head, but her mother was instantly scurrying over to them.</p><p>“Look at this!” she exclaimed, her voice energetic and accented. She gestured with open hands, “So many beautiful people.”</p><p>Claude tensed anxiously when Hilda smiled, bright and insincere. Her mother seemed unperturbed.</p><p>Lorenz felt himself de-age something like a decade, but still he managed, “And none lovelier than our hostess.”</p><p>Hilda’s mother crossed her hands over the center of her chest as she gave her daughter a longing pout, and Hilda did her best to naturally blink away a roll of her eyes, an easy accomplishment, what with how she moved away from her mother to start shoving her partners’ coats into a closet.</p><p>“Lorenz,” she cooed, with all the affection of a plotting matchmaker, “it’s been years. How are you?”</p><p>“Fine, thank you. I trust you’ve been keeping well?”</p><p>“Keeping well? I’m keeping busy! I thought retirement was supposed to be relaxing, but I’ve been finding more and more to do lately.”</p><p>“Oh that’s right,” Lorenz agreed, as if this were not something he and his partners had been recently discussing. “How long has it been now?”</p><p>“About four years — and it goes by so fast. I feel like I’m still on-call, like it was only last week I was spending all my life in scrubs.” She posed, raising her hands off to the side, tilting her head so that the silver in her grey-brown hair caught the light. She wore a long brown sweater that extended to her knees, patterned in bear silhouettes, and two toned pants that looked red where they were taught and purple in creases. “Have you ever seen me look so fashionable?”</p><p>“Lorenz, Claude, you remember my mother,” Hilda interrupted, saving Lorenz from having to respond.</p><p>“It’s nice to see you again, Mrs G,” Claude greeted.</p><p>She straightened, a polite smile on her lips in answer. <em>‘Goddess’ sake, just say hello.’ </em> Hilda wanted to shake her mother, but decided to continue the initial segue she’s settled upon.</p><p>“And this is Faedolyn.” She linked an arm with Fae to direct them forward, returning a bouquet of warm colored flowers from the sofa to their possession. A blush upon her cheeks, Hilda shared a grateful expression with her partner before a look back and forth between them and her mother.</p><p>There were enough similarities between them that Hilda’s partners could see which laugh lines of Hilda’s might become permanent, and how she would likely grow plump with age; but Lorenz also noticed that Hilda’s mother was shrinking, at one time taller than her daughter, now at least an inch shorter.</p><p>“It’s nice to meet you, Mrs Goneril.”</p><p>“<em>Please</em>,” she exaggerated, accepting the flowers as she looked directly at Hilda. “Hearing the whole name makes me think of Grandma Goneril.” Hilda’s expression stayed carefully neutral as her mother directed her attention back to Fae, pointing between them and herself. “Now that’s not even my mother-in-law, mind you, that’s <b>her</b> aunt. And I’m nowhere near that old. You can call me Mrs G, or Hanna.”</p><p>With an exclamation, Hanna leaned away as if struck. “Hesh! Do you remember when your mother sent me a birthday card addressed to Mrs Herschel Goneril?”</p><p>Hilda’s father scoffed from the living room. “As if you’d let me forget.”</p><p>“So don’t do that,” Hanna said to Fae, crossing her arms.</p><p>But Hilda and Fae, and Claude and Lorenz, all knew that Hilda had asked her mother earlier this week what her partners should call her, and as her parents were more traditional when it came to recognizing signs of respect, Hilda hadn’t been surprised when her mother had, at the time, confirmed that given names were inappropriate. Her mother had even spoken of how she hated when bank tellers and similar professionals thought to be so familiar with her. And so the invitation and the welcome felt stilted, and awkward.</p><p>Hanna started walking backwards, encouraging the gathering down the hall as she said to Fae, “But aren’t these pretty? But bad for winter, or so I’ve heard.”</p><p>“Snapdragons don’t agree with the cold,” Fae conceded. “They’re local though, and live a long time with a little care.”</p><p>“When they’re cut like this, they last as long as any other flower.”</p><p>“That’s true?” Fae felt confused, wondering if they were missing an implication.</p><p>“What do you think, Hesh?” Hanna asked, offering him the gift.</p><p>He accepted it as he stood, and for as intimidating as the older couple was, Fae was relieved to see his expression relax. “They’re wonderful.”</p><p>His voice was strained, and his posture was hunched, clearly once a taller man with a deeper voice. </p><p>“Do they mean anything?”</p><p>Fae shook their head. “I don’t speak in flowers, and I don’t have any formal training in flower arrangements either, though I’ve read more on that subject. Floriography’s usually less important than the gift itself.” </p><p>“Well thank you,” Herschel commended with a nod, handing them back to his wife. “Come, sit down,” he beckoned, letting himself fall back into the couch behind him. “Stay a minute.”</p><p>“It’s good to see you again, Mr Goneril,” Claude said quickly as the others separated, offering his hand, which the older man accepted on principle.</p><p>“Always professional.”</p><p>Hilda sat next to her father, Fae moving beyond her to sit by her side, while Claude and Lorenz found a couch on the far side of the room. A television sat in front of them, muted on some nature program.</p><p>“Your business is doing well?” Herschel queried politely.</p><p>Claude’s eyes sought Hilda for half a second, her sympathetic frown amusing him. “Better than I could have hoped when we started out. We’ve made a lot of good connections.”</p><p>“To pursue that work? Or just in general.”</p><p>“Both. There are patterns in everything,” Claude contributed.</p><p>Herschel cocked his head skeptically. His gaze skipped across Lorenz, as Hanna returned through a doorway between him and Fae. She moved to sit in an armchair next to her husband, across from Claude and Lorenz. </p><p>“Some things in life are still a surprise though, aren’t they?” Hanna mused, looking from Hilda across her soulmates. “You were less familiar with the patterns that would have untangled this puzzle sooner, I assume?”</p><p>“It happened when it needed to,” Lorenz contributed, smiling at the others, but especially Claude, who’d been surprised by his voice, before returning his attention to Hilda’s mother. “I’d loved none of them more than in that moment. I wouldn’t have known what to do with myself without that layer of friendship and trust.”</p><p>“And anyway,” Herschel added, “it may not have been such a surprise for Claude.”</p><p>Hilda and Claude moved to speak at the same time then, each prepared to try and mitigate the moment. Hilda stopped after a single warning, “Dad—?”</p><p>“Statistics on soulmates aren’t well-kept anywhere. I wouldn’t know whether it’s more common in Fodlan or Almyra to find situations like ours,” Claude said carefully. “But I, personally, was astonished.”</p><p>“Well,” Hanna said, as if trying to redirect the conversation, but what she said next had Hilda slump into Fae, “speaking of Almyra — Faedolyn, have you been?”</p><p>“Oh? I—? No, I’ve never been,” Fae answered, fiddling their hand between themselves and Hilda, seeking to hold hers.</p><p>“Claude, you’ll have to take her—them,” Hanna insisted.</p><p>“I think if we were going to make such an important trip, we’d all be going,” Claude said as casually as he could. “I’d even invite you, Mrs G.”</p><p>“Me!?” she laughed. “As if you’d want an old woman hovering over your shoulder.”</p><p>“He might as well get used to it,” said Herschel. “Or he may be already. What with how Hilda trails after him.”</p><p>“An honour,” Claude said in reflex. He looked to how Hilda had leaned back to Fae, her left forearm across her stomach, her fingers tangled with Fae’s. “I know I could rely on her for anything.”</p><p>Herschel chuckled, and bumped his elbow against his daughter. “I suppose you save all your lazy energy for when you’re at home, if Claude has <em> that </em> impression.”</p><p>Hilda tossed her head back with a grunt. “He just gives me too much credit.” She winked at Claude, sharing a performance. “But I’d need to have generous soulmates, wouldn’t I?”</p><p>Her father smiled as if this were a sweet statement and a valuable compliment that she had graced her partners with, but Hilda was trying not to wither under the statement. <em>‘Are they worse now than they used to be? Or was it always like this, and I was simply more blind to it?’ </em> She hoped her partners understood that she was imploring their generosity now, to suffer her parents for just a few minutes more.</p><p>Rushed heavy footsteps clambered behind a closed door in the hall, signaling the ascent of someone up the stairwell. It burst open dramatically, as Hilda’s brother made his entrance.</p><p>Whereas any of his houseguests would have been bashful after such an entrance, Holst’s enthusiasm only bloomed as he made eye contact with the crowd.</p><p>“Hello! Sorry, I was caught on the phone when I heard the door.” Hilda’s older brother was built like a brick wall, and he had a warm deep voice that suited his demeanor. Having seen photos of him, and been told that he was shorter than Lorenz, had Fae surprised that he had the presence of being three times his size, between the width of his jaw and the barrel of his chest. His pink hair, perhaps a shade darker than Hilda’s, was pulled back in a low bun, and he was well groomed, with a neat beard and thick eyebrows.</p><p>He leaned around his father, leaving a kiss atop his balding head, as he extended a hand to Hilda, and she let herself be pulled towards him for a quick embrace. “Hilda.”</p><p>“Holst,” she answered, relieved.</p><p>When he let her go, Claude was next, and then Lorenz, and he took each of their right hands as he wrapped his left arm around their shoulders in encompassing hugs, addressing them by name also, “Claude, Lorenz. Mother,” she got a full hug, both arms around her shoulders, and a kiss upon her cheek.</p><p>Hanna squeaked and swiped at her face. She announced, waving her hand towards Fae, “We were just meeting Faedolyn.”</p><p>“A pleasure,” Holst agreed, turning back to offer them his hand. His grip was firm, and the gesture was polite considering they hadn’t met before, and the way Lorenz seemed to still be rolling his shoulders in recovery.</p><p>“Thank you,” they said quietly, relaxed now that they could feel how Hilda eased next to them.</p><p>Holst smiled in response, and then sat on the arm of the couch next to Claude. “What were we talking about?”</p><p>“Travel,” Claude answered quickly, and carefully.</p><p>Holst nodded back at Faedolyn, “Oh, yes? Hilda says you’re from Adrestia.”</p><p>“Remire,” Fae confirmed, nodding. “It’s been a few years. I don’t have family I’m familiar with there any more, but I have fond memories. Have you been?”</p><p>“I flew over on my way to Brigid when I was about seventeen, but besides that I’ve only been as close as Myrddin, and not in the country proper. Dad’s been though.”</p><p>Mr Goneril crossed his arms, giving his son an annoyed look at the same time that Hilda was looking at Holst, wide-eyed and indignant.</p><p>“It was…” Mr Goneril floundered. “I went for business, and so I may not have appreciated it as much as I might have if I’d been visiting,” he said as if excusing himself. “There was a cafeteria in the court house that sold ham, cheese or ham and cheese sandwiches.”</p><p>Lorenz snickered, and Herschel looked pleased, but whether it was because someone had responded favorably to his story or because it offered him a chance to redirect the attention Holst had placed on him, Hilda could only guess.</p><p>“Lorenz, you’ve been to Adrestia,” said Herschel, like an offering.</p><p>“I have,” Lorenz agreed. “And I’ve spoken with Fae about it at length. The mountains they’ve seen, but the western coast … that’ll have to wait for another time I suppose. I even managed to see an opera when my parents took me to Enbarr … but I was eight and probably insufferable. I don’t remember much more than a song and a few costumes.”</p><p>“How is your father?” Herschel asked, his voice going dark and critical. He’d never liked ‘the sort of man Lorenz’s father was’ even when Lorenz and Hilda had been dating. “I can’t imagine he’s too happy with how this is turning out?”</p><p>Lorenz felt Claude pinch his sleeve and realized he’d been stretching his own thumb far enough to risk  injury, and tried to rest his hands on his knees naturally. “He’s fine,” Lorenz peeped. “I saw him recently, and he … tries to be supportive, in his way.” He found himself tempted to remind the Gonerils that his father had been none too happy with him for years now, to wrap an arm around Claude in explanation, but considering the state of things Lorenz satisfied himself with saying, “Although his manner of concern was misplaced, I’ve not been distressed by my soulmates.”</p><p>His statement earned a glance between Hilda and her mother, and Hilda smiled though she knew that her mother was signaling that she should be grateful.</p><p>“And why would you be?” Holst said merrily.</p><p>“Hilda and I have seen <em> some soulmates</em>,” Claude lamented, and she whistled in support of his point. “They end up terrified of what comes next, or how to reconcile changes and constants in each other's lives.”</p><p>“Like family!” Hanna laughed, and Claude tilted his head politely, eyebrows raised in reserved agreement.</p><p>They gossiped of conflicts witnessed personally and through conjecture, like celebrities, and spoke of work, and pets, and a little of family history, until Hanna excused herself to check on dinner. The kitchen noises taunted a curious cat out from under the end table beside the arm of the couch where Claude sat, an auburn munchkin with a long curled tail named Little Monster who sprinted away past the crowd. Hanna poked her head out to announce it would still be another forty minutes more, and Holst offered to get everyone something to drink and invited them down into his room. Lorenz and Fae each offered to help, and Holst took Lorenz up on the offer, hissing in a quiet breath in his presence when his father took the opportunity to make another comment about Hilda’s apparent sloth.</p><p>Soda and juice distributed, Holst spoke with Fae as Hilda closed the door to the basement behind their little group as they descended a winding stair.</p><p>“Little Monster is my father’s,” Holst explained, “but Nidhogg and Noraxia are mine, and they don’t usually wander too far from our nook. Nor do I, to be honest.”</p><p>The basement was finished, furnished and neatly cluttered. It seemed to span the length of the house, with five doors speaking to other features, including a dark bedroom and an orderly bathroom. Fae could immediately see the 70s influence, between the wood paneling on the walls and a psychedelic shade upon the main overhead light, though even the matching green sofa and armchair were telling.</p><p>A dormant television slept across from the seating, a coffee table between them housed a tidy stack of books. A bookshelf sat to one side, stuffed with more papers than novels, while the back of the main room was mostly occupied by work out equipment, and a sturdy cat tree.</p><p>They were greeted by a white and brown ragdoll cat, who trotted up to the group for inspection, and shied away to mew curiously at Holst about the intruders in their home.</p><p>“Nawh! So pretty,” Claude cooed, pleased when the cat’s big blue eyes focused on him.</p><p>“And pampered,” Holst agreed. “I brushed her forever so that she might not shed all over you during your visit. Nidhogg is definitely sleeping somewhere, but he should also be more friendly than Little Monster was.”</p><p>When they were in the deepest part of the basement, far from the stairwell, Hilda turned to Fae nervously. “Are you alright?”</p><p>“What? Oh! I’m fine, it happens all the time,” Fae allowed with a shrug and a shake of their head, “and I never usually expect people to correct themselves. It’s fine.”</p><p>“Okay. Alright. Thank you.” Hilda sighed, still distraught because those were strangers, and this was her mother, and an environment that she’d invited Fae into, but there was little left to do than squeeze their hands, and examine her regrets. She turned over her shoulder to where Claude had moved to sit on a workbench with Lorenz, as Holst twisted the armchair to be able to face them and the sofa both.</p><p>“Claude, are you—?”</p><p>“I’m good!” But his tone and the speed of his reply caused Hilda to scoff and roll her head back, leaving Fae to sit on the sofa, close to the others.</p><p>“Maybe I should’ve pretended to be sick?” Hilda suggested. “I still could.”</p><p>“Hilda.” Claude didn’t say her name quite as a question, and neither as a warning, but with a twinge of amusement, which only distressed her further.</p><p>“I could cancel, they’d be…” she sighed, slouching, looking between Claude and her brother, “they’ll be expecting me to cancel.”</p><p>“If you need to leave—” Lorenz began.</p><p>“Then it’ll be worse the next time,” Claude lamented, shooting Lorenz a look.</p><p>“I can’t believe they’d — urgh!” Hilda groaned, hiding her face in her hands as she rested her elbows on her knees.</p><p>“I think that—” Holst stopped when his father’s muffled, angry voice reverberated from the upper floor, and he cursed under his breath as he moved across the room to the television remote.</p><p>Hilda felt her heart fall through her chest as the words ‘promiscuous’ and ‘into my house’ came through more clearly than the rest before Holst could turn up the volume on some live show on a music station.</p><p>Fae moved to sit behind Hilda, tentatively resting one hand on her elbow and another on her opposite shoulder. They were sure that if they said they wanted to leave, that their soulmates would have made it happen, but it wasn’t a matter of being unable to tolerate how they were being treated, and there was something invasive about not wanting to tolerate how Hilda’s parents spoke of her, from such a small interaction. It had to be her call, or Fae had to wait longer to know better what offence was actually to be had.</p><p>“I thought they’d be relieved. They wanted me to have a relationship, and I wanted to find my soulmate, and I thought that when I did…”</p><p>“They might’ve been,” Claude said mournfully.</p><p>Hilda knew he meant, ‘if not for him,’ but it went deeper than that, and she shook her head.</p><p>“They like to think they aren’t hard to please,” Holst said sympathetically.</p><p>“As if they’re not always singing your praises,” Hilda said, with mock judgement and in good humour.</p><p>“They pick and choose,” Holst said, agreeing and disagreeing as he touched the back of his neck. “I’m lucky that my goals have aligned with what they usually want from me, even when my motivations often come from somewhere else, or when our values clash.” He held up a hand towards Claude, “I’ll say something about the difference between marriage and soulmates and just … Almyra in general after you’ve gone.” He raised his voice, “Although I think what spurred that whole part of the conversation was that they take exception to <b>you</b>, more specifically.”</p><p>“I…” Claude looked down and away for a moment, deciding whether to give voice to something that he suspected they all realized. “It makes sense that they’d still blame me for getting in the way of Lorenz and Hilda.”</p><p>Lorenz and Hilda each tsked and shot him a quick expression of disgust, and Claude smiled, satisfied. He shrugged.</p><p>An extremely loud shampoo commercial tore the group’s attention for a moment, and Holst adjusted the volume with a chuckle. “I usually try not to have guests while they’re home. Dating’s a nightmare.”</p><p>“When was the last time you were on a date?” Hilda asked skeptically.</p><p>“Exactly.” He stretched forward to pick up his cat, a clawed hand extended up over his knee, cooing, “Raxi.” He assured Hilda, “It’s mostly by choice.” </p><p>Suddenly, Holst’s pink eyes went wide in realization, “And before I forget — my phone call before you arrived? I got a call back from that other office. I didn’t get the job, but they’re putting me in a paid training program to fit me into a different position, with better pay, in two months, hopefully.”</p><p>“Goddess, it’s really in the air,” Hilda observed. “Congratulations. I think? I mean, it’s too bad about the job you applied for, but — <b>paid</b> training?”</p><p>“I know!”</p><p>Holst was a Labour Negotiator, and while it seemed to be a line of education that resulted in a horrible amount of debt, Fae supposed it made sense that if anyone was able to arbitrate for paid training, it would be workers in that field. They spoke of colleagues and friends afterwards, and Leonie still blaming him for her taste in music, which led to Holst showing that he still had nine records on his bookshelf, even with nothing to play them. The concert on the television ended before dinner was called, and Holst found a rerun of a science fantasy mystery show to mutter in the background of their conversation.</p><p>When they finally made their ascent, a pair of yellow eyes watched out of Holst’s bedroom, and manifested as a black cat clawing for the edge of Lorenz’s left sock as he passed the open door.</p><p>“Euh!”</p><p>“Chosen,” Claude teased.</p><p>“As the weak link,” Lorenz lamented in exaggeration, plucking Nidhogg free.</p><p> </p><p>Hilda and Holst ran about setting the table and refilling drinks, while the others took turns washing their hands, and tripping over Little Monster. Herschel helped Hanna serve the table, who were soon tripping over themselves to compliment the chef on her braised short ribs and pickled salad.</p><p>“So, Faedolyn,” Hanna beckoned while her guest was between bites. “Hilda tells me you’ve cooked a few meals for her?”</p><p>Fae held a hand in front of their mouth as they swept their tongue over their teeth. “Well, nothing like this. Just, little meals for two?”</p><p>“But that sounds nice,” Hanna insisted, extending a hand to Hilda’s shoulder. “I can’t remember the last time I had a meal with my daughter, just us two. Can you?”</p><p>“No, um—” Hilda faltered, unable to parse her mother’s motivation. It could be love, but … it felt insensitive to use her partner for that, not that insensitivity was beyond her mother, it was just … strange.</p><p>“I’ve always had to work to spend time with you,” Hanna went on, and Hilda was grateful as Holst spoke over their mother to gain Fae’s attention, and Lorenz asked something of Herschel, so that whatever it was her mother was saying was not the center of her soulmates’ attention. “You used to spend so much time in your bedroom. Always hiding in your own little world.”</p><p>Hilda held her tongue. If they were going down memory lane, then that was <em> fine</em>, but the only reason she’d found the will to leave her nook was because that too was invaded. She shrugged as she said softly, “Just shy. But I grew out of that.”</p><p>“Yes, and then you were always out with your friends.” Hanna sighed. “Did I chase you away?”</p><p>Hilda swallowed three long gulps of water. She hated this, especially as she expected her partners would ‘check in’ on her about it later when she already wanted to bury this moment. She smiled at her mother; her eyes flicking to and from her father for just a moment. “I’m right here, Mom. Not chased away.”</p><p>“You’re right. You’re right, of course,” Hanna agreed. “Lorenz, are you still writing?”</p><p>He imagined himself fainting, mortified that anything he’d written as a teenager might have survived in this house. “Not so much,” he lied, more comfortable with evoking Hanna’s sympathy than her interest, as she lamented people needing creative hobbies and that he should reconsider it.</p><p>It provided an opportunity for Fae and Hilda to have a back and forth about Hilda’s jewelry and her guilting them into trying their hand at a few little beaded things that had nearly been lost to memory. Hanna revealed that she both made charms and crocheted, while Herschel played guitar with a band on Sundays and Holst dabbled in photography and sketches of trees.</p><p>And then somehow the conversation turned to grief, about people and places and moments long past, but in a warm and comfortable way. Hanna shared about living in a two room apartment with her parents as a child, Herschel reminisced about choosing not to pursue relocating for his career for the sake of a fourth date with his now-wife, Fae wondered about their decision not to move out of the city when they’d dropped out of college, and suddenly Hilda realized that if she’d really just been floating through life, as was sometimes the impression she even had of herself, she wouldn’t have changed her courses to align with Claude, and she would likely be in immigration or social services … and not across the street from Fae.</p><p>It was a nice reminder that she wasn’t just a passenger in her own life.</p><p> </p><p>After dinner, Fae and Holst rinsed the dishes and loaded them into the dishwasher, and Hilda could hear them laughing more clearly than Claude and Lorenz whispering next to her in the living room.</p><p>Her father stood in the hallway with his hands in his pockets, looking extremely uncomfortable, and for a moment Hilda wondered if he too would dart into a corner like Little Monster if it were acceptable.</p><p>“Hilda,” he beckoned, and she lowered her head as she realized that part of his discomfort was that she hadn’t recognized he’d been silently hoping she’d join him.</p><p>“Just a sec,” she said to Claude at her side, who nodded though she’d turned away from him to follow her father down to the foyer.</p><p>“Sorry, were you in the middle of something?”</p><p>Hilda suppressed her amusement, and answered her father with sincere concern and reassurance, “No? You know me, just in my head.”</p><p>He nodded, as if it were serious, and words of affectionate mockery rang in her head, that she’d long ago learned not to voice in his presence.</p><p>“I … still don’t know how to feel about … well...” He gestured into the house with a jut of his chin, and Hilda felt her eyes well up, reactionary and stupid, as if she was dependant on his approval, or at risk of losing anything without it. “Regardless, I want you to know you’ll always have a home here. That if you’re ever uncomfortable or need your own space or need someone to talk to — that we’re here for you.”</p><p>Hilda doubted she would ever think of having a room in this house as having her own space ever again, and she took exception to the prospect that her father could neither approach this conversation with an apology or with pride. He couldn’t be happy that she was, he couldn’t trust her judgement or her friends of years, and his instinct was to presume the worst of her soulmates. <em>‘But if they weren’t my soulmates, you wouldn’t even have found this kindness.’ </em></p><p>“I know,” she agreed.</p><p>“Good.”</p><p>He initiated a hug afterwards, which Hilda returned, bittersweet and grateful.</p><p>“I love you,” she said as they pulled away, because her father never said that first, and sometimes didn’t return the phrase.</p><p>“I love you too.”</p><p> </p><p>They didn’t stay much longer, and it was still before nine when the door closed behind Hilda and her soulmates, though the sky was dark and the streets and snow were tinted orange with lamplight.</p><p>“I think I want to go to my apartment,” Hilda announced, her heart dropping when she saw how this hurt her soulmates.</p><p>“Do you want to be alone?” Fae asked, taking Hilda’s hands as she nodded.</p><p>“I just…” she took a deep breath, “want to get a bath and reset.”</p><p>Claude waved Lorenz back around to his side of his vehicle. “Can I hug you goodbye?”</p><p>“Yeah,” Hilda said, trying to keep the word from sounding like a sob as she let Claude pull her in arms. She found that Fae wouldn’t let go of her left hand, and gasped in surprise and relief when Claude stood up and put his hands to either side of her head, fixing her bangs with his thumbs, and securing their soulmate connection, for just a moment.</p><p>He regretted that she, presumably, wanted to ‘go home,’ and that home wasn’t with him yet, but understood her desire for privacy.</p><p>“It’s almost the weekend?” Claude said as a point of mock comfort, and relaxed when Hilda laughed and turned her head away, so that his fingers trailed curls behind her ears as they slipped free of her.</p><p>“Longest week in a while,” Lorenz observed.</p><p>“Do you need a ride?” Hilda asked Fae, running a fingertip under one eye.</p><p>“We can handle that?” Claude suggested, and Fae nodded.</p><p>“Can I still come over?” Fae confirmed.</p><p>Claude’s smile surprised himself. “Yeah.”</p><p>“Okay,” Hilda said, digesting her own decision. She ran her fingers up the sides of her hair and combed it down, restyling whatever Claude had done. “You’re not mad?”</p><p>“No.” The others said at once.</p><p>“Not even a little,” Fae promised.</p><p>“Alright, then let’s go before they look out the window and think something’s wrong.”</p><p>Lorenz considered approaching Hilda, but if he’d been conflicted on it before, he was far worse for it after her observation. He held his arms around Fae instead, a soft squeeze around their middle as he nodded at their girlfriend. “Bye, Hilda.”</p><p>“Bye.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I toned down the micro aggressions and decided against two flat-out "aggressions." I wanted Hilda's relationship to her parents to be strained, but not "unforgiveable" and I wanted Holst to seem to have some Wisdom and to be generally likable. I'm still unsure if I balanced in the best way, but hopefully these versions of these characters translated well.</p><p>I don't know how many times I've said this in fic notes, but probably not yet in this fic; but we have too many examples of people traveling between Almyra and Fodlan, I think the Gonerils (at least) have a number of dark-skinned cousins, and I think this is why no in-game flags were raised (further than they were) about Claude and his identity. Being from a mixed race family, I can say that this sadly doesn't stop family members from holding racist views. This is how I view Hilda's parents, and I think Holst's in-canon letter to Hilda in her A support with Cyril is him begging her to have a broader worldview and kinder ideals.</p><p>The next chapter does intend to follow up on Claude, Lorenz and Fae at the one apartment, and Hilda the following day or the day after.</p><p>I think of Hilda's supports with Caspar of not wanting to be a part of commotion, and her telling others about her father and brother telling her not to be so lazy, and I imagine that without the proper audience, she wouldn't be expending energy on being an extrovert. So I don't necessarily think she was ever "shy" but I think it'd be easy for her to present that excuse to her mother. Also, in a modern setting like this, I would suspect her dancing would not be of a nature that her parents would find too much pride. I think she's extroverted and loud because usually otherwise in her home setting where people are big and loud and take up a lot of emotional space she wouldn't be heard!</p><p>Edited the title of this chapter almost instantly when I realized it sounded like The Worst Euphemism. Help. Chapter titles are hard.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0032"><h2>32. Safe Enough To Feel</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Fae sat behind Claude as they were leaving, and could tell that he and Lorenz were on the verge of something. They couldn’t quite tell if it was an argument or a breakdown or just a mountain of vented gossip, and Fae watched them separate from Hilda’s vehicle uneasily.</p><p>As they exited the crescent Claude sighed. “For as uncomfortable as the rest of that was, I wish they didn’t talk to Hilda like that.”</p><p>“They could never decide if they wanted her to be a lawyer or a housewife,” Lorenz said sadly. “With no regard for the rest of her.”</p><p>“I can’t believe her father raised his voice while we were in the house,” Fae contributed, leaning forward in their seat.</p><p>“A combination of anger and hearing-loss,” Lorenz said with a tilt of his head. “From what I understand his temper is far more muted now than years ago.”</p><p>“Do either of you shout when you’re angry? Does Hilda?” Fae asked, sitting back as Lorenz twisted around to face them.</p><p>“I don’t think Claude’s ever raised his voice,” Lorenz observed.</p><p>“Try not to,” Claude agreed.</p><p>“I might exclaim if I need things to ‘stop,’ but, I’ve never shouted at Claude or Hilda.”</p><p>“Yet,” Claude teased, snickering when Lorenz playfully struck his shoulder.</p><p>“I don’t know if I’ve seen Hilda angry,” Lorenz confessed. “Hurt or, well, murderous, disappointed and sad, but not…”</p><p>“That’s fine,” Fae assured him as he trailed off. “<b>I</b> have outbursts,” they warned, to Lorenz’s raised eyebrows, “but usually about moments and not <em> at people</em>, if that makes sense.”</p><p>“You do?” Claude prompted, surprised.</p><p>“I try to reserve them for when I’m alone, or with sympathetic people, but I have my limits.”</p><p>“Then I hope not to find them,” Lorenz said, extending a hand back for Fae to take. “But feel free to let us know if you need to get anything off your chest?”</p><p>“I know.”</p><p> </p><p>They spoke of Holst and his cats, and Claude thought of how a few years ago he hadn’t suggested he and Lorenz get one, or any pet, because the prospect of Lorenz finding his soulmate and either being left with a living creature, or being left alone afterwards had filled him with dread. He wondered whether there was anything he should’ve done to keep Hilda from feeling so low.</p><p>Fae and Lorenz were still chuckling softly when Claude was slowing at the entrance to the parking by his apartment.</p><p>“I want to do something nice for Hilda.”</p><p>“Like what?” Fae asked, while Lorenz resettled in his seat to give Claude room in their conversation.</p><p>Claude raised his eyes to Lorenz who wrinkled his nose in suspicion.</p><p>“I was thinking we could set up a corner for her crafting. I have that old desk in storage, and it wouldn’t take much to make it look nice. I could go buy a chair and a light right now, and could stop by that art supply store tomorrow for little shelves or something?”</p><p>“Are we alright for money?” Lorenz asked, worrying that the unplanned gift sounded like a fair investment, and worried about how his contribution to their little household was shrinking.</p><p>“We’re fine,” Claude promised.</p><p>“I can help some,” Fae offered.</p><p>Lorenz sighed, nodding, not wanting to appear as though he didn’t see the value in such a gift, with the excuse of holidays and the new year approaching.</p><p>“Alright, well leave me here to sort out the desk, and go get your chair,” Lorenz said, unbuckling himself. “Hopefully I’ll have been able to move your bookshelf by the time you get back.”</p><p>Claude whined. “Do not move that bookshelf until we get back. I don’t want to come back to you having broken your neck.”</p><p>Lorenz rolled his eyes from outside as Fae exited the back of the vehicle, “Alright. Drive safe.”</p><p>He turned and caught Fae in a kiss before departing from them, as they took his spot next to Claude.</p><p> </p><p>They clambered into bed around midnight, and the bedroom was dark and quiet as Claude slid up behind Lorenz, slotting his boyfriend in as little spoon as Fae asked, “What will you do if Hilda wants to come over tomorrow?”</p><p>“I expected her to want to,” Claude confessed, hopeful. He shifted to allow room for Lorenz to lay on his back. “I figured you could encourage her to go home and collect some of her crafting materials first, and by the time you arrive we should be done?”</p><p>Fae smiled, nodding their understanding as they stretched an arm across Lorenz’s middle to touch upon Claude’s arm.</p><p>“Besides I should get home with a few hours to spare,” Lorenz said thoughtfully, curling his left hand around Fae’s forearm, which stretched away from him as Claude led their fingers to his lips.</p><p>Claude stretched forward to kiss Lorenz next; he’d intended to find his cheek, but Lorenz turned to meet him. Gently, he brought Fae’s hand back to Lorenz’s chest, directing them so that Lorenz’s hand lay atop theirs. The soulmate connection may not have been present, but Claude felt like he could fool himself.</p><p>“I like this,” he whispered, gaze drifting to Fae’s green eyes.</p><p>“Me too,” Fae agreed, tangling a leg between Lorenz’s.</p><p>Lorenz sat up a little to dislodge his soulmates. “Don’t start,” he warned. He rounded on Fae, “We need to wake up early tomorrow.”</p><p>Fae stretched to kiss him, amused and sincere, “Sorry.”</p><p>Lorenz rolled his eyes fondly, letting Fae hold their weight on his chest as they kissed Claude next, before reconfiguring themselves, until he and they had rolled over three times finding a comfortable position while allowing Claude his space.</p><p> </p><p>When Hilda arrived at the office, she called out a casual greeting for Claude, and averted her eyes when he stepped out of his office to find her, concerned and eager. She let him kiss her temple and luxuriated in the attention, what with how Claude’s eyes widened in curiosity at the sight of her dark mauve lipstick, struggling to decipher her state of mind.</p><p>Hilda messaged Fae and Lorenz throughout the day, assuring them she felt better, even if she was a little unsure of herself. She was relieved to be distracted by work, answering questions for several prospective clients, less than half of which she expected would ever actually pay anything for her time, but it was a good day.</p><p>At the end of it, Hilda gave Fae a lift to their apartment, where they could water their plants and collect some things. She’d been concerned that her partner just wanted to get her alone to have a more serious discussion, and was surprised when Fae offered their bed for a nap.</p><p>“I don’t want to get makeup all over your pillows,” Hilda whined, touching her cheeks.</p><p>“I don’t mind,” Fae assured her, amused. “But I still have those wipes if you want? If that’s your only reason to refuse?” When Hilda looked like she might continue to object, Fae added, “Or you can just rest your head on me, instead, and spare the pillows?”</p><p>Hilda grimaced, skeptic and weighing the value of her cosmetics and the time it had taken to apply them, but she nodded in the end, and sat next to Fae on the side of their bed as they started the motions of removing their bra from beneath their clothing, while Hilda discarded her pants.</p><p>Fae laid a warm hand on Hilda’s frozen thigh afterwards, and lifted it off of her in surprise before pressing back down. “Hilda?”</p><p>“It’s fine.” Hilda snickered.</p><p>“Do you want me to put your pants on the heater for a few minutes?”</p><p>“Sure?” Hilda agreed, still amused, because she could remember socks and mittens left on heaters in childhood, but never more substantial clothing.</p><p>Fae lay on their back afterwards, and Hilda curled over them, pulling the comforter with her to bundle the pair of them together. Fae had removed their pants also, and they tangled their legs with Hilda’s, resting an arm across her as she settled on their chest.</p><p>They were tempted to ask Hilda what she wanted out of their relationship, but were wary about having a serious, and possibly complicated and hurtful discussion before bringing her to Claude and Lorenz’s surprise. A place to rest seemed like a sufficient offering for the time being, and Fae drifted in and out of wakefulness as Hilda pulled a pillow down by their side after all, and rolled so that her back pressed up against them.</p><p>It was only when Fae’s phone vibrated on their bedside that Hilda seemed disturbed, a fair forty minutes later.</p><p>“News?”</p><p>“Just Claude,” Fae assured her. “Wondering where we are.”</p><p>“Mm.”</p><p>“Do you want to stay here tonight?” They leaned over Hilda with the question, pressing their lips to the back of her neck. “I’ll tell them?”</p><p>“No? It’s not too late is it?”</p><p>“No, we’re fine,” Fae agreed, kissing her before shuffling away. “Let me get your clothes. Hey, did you bring your crafting supplies?”</p><p>“No,” Hilda confessed, rolling over.</p><p> </p><p>When they finally arrived at Claude and Lorenz’s apartment, they were greeted by Lorenz at the door. He kissed them both and happily accepted a box of craftworks and half finished projects from Hilda’s arms.</p><p>“Thank you,” Hilda peeped, and Lorenz couldn’t help watching the way her lips formed the words, the tingle of her lipstick still upon his lips.</p><p>“My pleasure,” he promised.</p><p>“Hey,” Claude greeted from the living room, because he could not be trusted to be subtle in his excitement. His hints of surprises were inflated by his eagerness to share joy, so that even without knowing what held Claude back, this aspect of his personality shone through, and Hilda assumed he simply didn’t want to overwhelm her.</p><p>She spared one last look for Lorenz, before scurrying over to sit with Claude, pressing her hands in the curls on the back of his head. “Hi Honey.”</p><p>Claude’s smile widened and he readily accepted her in arms as she sat sideways in his lap, leaning back against the arm of the couch. “It’s good to see you feeling better.”</p><p>Hilda relaxed in his embrace, but whether because she was wistful or comfortable, Claude couldn’t tell, and worried he shouldn’t have brought attention to it.</p><p>“I am,” she promised.</p><p>“What do you want to do?”</p><p>“Nothing?” she lowered her brow, suspicious.</p><p>“I’m just trying to be polite,” Claude insisted, nuzzling against the side of her head.</p><p>Hilda hummed thoughtfully, and kissed him thrice, shaking in his arms with silent giggles because Claude’s smile was infectious. She was reminded of how recently their relationship had changed, of how recently she wouldn’t have had his embrace to retreat to. Whenever she was distraught by something before he would have been so careful about stepping on her feelings, but now was ready to risk his affection with eager open arms.</p><p>“Well, I want to be pampered, not coddled,” she said, partially to tease and otherwise to clarify, sliding firm fingertips down the side of his neck.</p><p>“Dinner’s ready?” he suggested, “Or I could have Lorenz make you tea?”</p><p>“You weren’t waiting for me to eat?” Hilda worried.</p><p>“No,” Claude assured her, shaking his head.</p><p>Without actually answering him, Hilda skipped to her feet, and she and Claude set to making plates for her and Fae, while Fae and Lorenz had slipped into the guest room with what Fae had convinced Hilda to bring as a matter of weekend supplies.</p><p> </p><p>“To think this is nearly no different than what she usually hauls around,” Lorenz observed, comparing the weight of the box to Hilda’s large purses.</p><p>“This might cut down on some of that,” Fae suggested. “If she only brings it around because she doesn’t like crafting at home alone?”</p><p>Lorenz blushed. “I don’t think I ever considered that a romantic relationship could be a social thing.”</p><p>“Is that bad?” Fae slowly opened a small bag of beads to place in small open boxes upon the desk.</p><p>“No, but—” Lorenz faltered. He moved to Fae’s side to cup his hands around where they were pouring delicate, easily lost materials into little containers, “I do find myself reminded of something I read once about families who slept together, not intimately, just, the parents and children all in the same bed, and <em>this</em> was how they still each had their own space in the home,” he nodded to the desk, “even if it wasn’t a whole dedicated room for sleeping. I think we could do that… I mean, we still need a larger apartment, maybe even a house, but … if there were room in the bed, if that were neutral ground, and not where we were expected to go to be alone… <b>I</b> missed Hilda last night.”</p><p>“You should tell her,” Fae said, warm. Distracted, they gestured to the decorations, “These are so cute.”</p><p>Lorenz opened his mouth to agree, but then Claude was stepping in the doorway, and inviting Fae to eat, and a series of amused nods were exchanged as they parted ways.</p><p> </p><p>Fae and Hilda ate on the couch, and when Lorenz appeared, Claude slipped from his seat to the floor and invited Lorenz to take the chair so that he could lean back between his knees. They sat in silence, a seasonal romance on the television, which soon reminded Lorenz to stand again, because it was the end of the week and there were still boxes under the dining table that housed photos of his broken family, and a wine bottle on the counter that begged to be opened.</p><p>Though Fae joined Lorenz, Claude held off drinking. He was already waiting out the impulse to ask Hilda if she wanted to get ready for bed, whether in innocence or with a sensual invitation. The thought of eating her out in that new chair while she pulled his hair and moaned his name sitting somewhere beyond the surface of his mind.</p><p>In the end, in trying to act normal he’d been at the sink, rinsing dishes when Lorenz bumped the middle of his back with the back of his hand, so they could join Fae in the hallway, slowly chasing after Hilda’s trek to the guest room.</p><p> </p><p>It was more the surprise of walking into an unexpectedly unfamiliar room which had Hilda gasp initially. The bed had been turned and pressed against the side wall, so that at the back of the room two desks sat side by side. The one to the right housed the desktop computer, while the one to the left was closer to where the window opened, as if for ventilation, and held many of the materials she and Fae had brought from her apartment.</p><p>They were neatly arranged in a little dresser shaped snap box, beside two lamps: one was a metal clamp lamp that clung to the side and could be oriented any which way, and the other was soft and pink, and currently illuminated, in the shape of a star. There were decals placed on the surrounding wall, little floral splashes of filigree, and the curved chair felt like it matched, despite its grey stitching.</p><p>Hilda pulled the chair out, and it rolled upon a flat carpet, pink with blue spirals and gold stars. It felt childish, a little, or at least, not modern in the way that most of the rest of the apartment did. Looking over her shoulder, Hilda saw her partners, and instantly turned away from them, even though they were smiling and hopeful. The idea of taking up space that she hadn’t carved out for herself through words or actions worried her suddenly. She sat in the chair, and reflected on how she’d approached Claude a moment ago, because this felt like far more than pampering, and that she hadn’t meant to actually make her partners work beyond their usual efforts and intimacy.</p><p>She reached out to three unfamiliar plush animals on the desk, and found that they were little jewelry displays, with a place for earrings to hang from an eagle’s wings, rings to sit around a lion’s stomach, and for necklaces to stretch across a deer’s antlers. Silly little offerings, that were made with love.</p><p>She’d thought a lot about love last night, about how love or the lack of it had shaped nearly every decision in her life. She’d wondered whether it had meant she was a selfish person; and to receive a gift like this hurt, a little, with the idea that she could fail and face no consequence.</p><p>“Wow, um,” Hilda hesitated, turning her seat around. She cleared her throat, smiling and recollecting herself. “Thank you so much. This is so nice. You really didn’t have to…” She started to turn the chair aside, taking in another view of their work.</p><p>“We wanted to,” Claude said, sounding worried. “You like it?”</p><p>“I do,” she said quickly. “I—”</p><p>She looked ready to cry, and Claude pulled her into a hug.</p><p>Fae moved to sit in the middle of the bed, while Lorenz slouched in the doorway, and Hilda shut her eyes not to have to face them.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” Claude hissed, mournful.</p><p>“Why?” Hilda asked, the word coming out as a loud, squeaky sob.</p><p>“I should have asked,” he said softly.</p><p>“I shouldn’t have touched your beads,” Fae echoed.</p><p>“It’s fine. It’s beautiful. I love it,” Hilda cried, so that Claude chuckled softly.</p><p>“Really?” he pressed.</p><p>“Mmhmm.”</p><p>She opened her eyes to the sound of Lorenz stepping away, and released Claude upon his return, accepting tissues with which she could wipe her face.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” Hilda whispered. “I don’t want to…”</p><p>“Go on,” Lorenz encouraged, sitting on the bedside and wrapping an arm around Fae’s waist.</p><p>“I don’t want to let you down.” There was an outcry of noise, but Hilda held up her hands. “I don’t want you to be able to look at things you’ve done for me, and feel like it wasn’t worth it.”</p><p>Claude lowered himself to his knees, sliding a hand up over her thigh.</p><p>“I know how you feel,” he promised.</p><p>“We won’t do that,” Fae said in reassurance, but Lorenz felt how their grip squeezed upon his hand, and worried which part of this might be upsetting them so badly.</p><p>Regardless, he said for Hilda’s benefit, “This was just part of a future together. Like you said.”</p><p>Hilda needed her tissues again after that, and Lorenz turned to Fae, whispering, “Are you alright?”</p><p>Fae nodded, quick and short, and accepted a kiss from Lorenz.</p><p>The rest of the night was spent in similar comfort. They stayed up late, in the safety of their soulmate connection, as they repeated insecurities and frustrations and pain, and heard those sentiments echoed and challenged and loved. They were relieved that their next outing wouldn’t be for more than a week, and would be with friends, who wouldn’t balk if they openly held one another.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I hope this was fine. I love you for reading this. I'd love a kudos or comment. We're going to Dedue's for New Year's in the next chapter. (:</p><p>I'm sorry if the eagle, lion and deer were too cheesy, I couldn't help myself.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0033"><h2>33. A New Year Means Soft Promises</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I'm not tagging more couples, but there's background Caspar x Linhardt and background Ashe x Marianne this chapter also.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It had been months since Fae had last been to Dedue’s place. Between being overworked and weary, and then busy learning about their soulmates, they’d lost motivation to see each other outside of work. Even so, these conversations had been enough to reveal that he’d been messaging Marianne about exotic birds and flowers, brought so far from home, and that Leonie and Raphael had been let in on a running competition between he, Caspar and some other friends of theirs, tracking their weekly exercise and physical improvement.</p><p>Raphael, to his own relief, was busy with work, but Leonie and Marianne had brought Linhardt with them for Dedue's New Year's celebration, and stood with Fae and their soulmates on his doorstep. Linhardt yawned casually as Hilda pressed the doorbell.</p><p>“Lin, it’s not even eight o’clock,” Leonie chastised, a fond laugh tickling out of her.</p><p>“Mm? You think I’ll be up until midnight?” His tone was conversational, not incredulous, and this brought a smile to Fae’s lips, which he returned, merrily.</p><p>“You shouldn’t sleep in a stranger’s house,” Lorenz said, more concerned than judgmental.</p><p>“Then be interesting,” Linhardt challenged, coy, adjusting a lock of his hair. Lorenz scoffed.</p><p>The door stuck on the threshold, before swinging inwards with speed. The man who answered smiled sheepishly for a moment, endearing and relatable until his confidence flowed back into him, recovering far more quickly than some of his guests would have.  From experience, social media or description, they instantly recognized him.</p><p>“Caspar,” Fae greeted.</p><p>“Hey-ey-ey! Fae! It’s been a while!” He took their hand and clasped their elbow, a friendly, welcoming gesture that he looked to offer Linhardt next. “Is this a relative of yorrrrrrrr—?”</p><p>Caspar sounded like a skipping record, and Fae, Claude, Hilda and Lorenz all went wide-eyed in understanding, Linhardt’s grip momentarily knuckle white around Caspar’s hand.</p><p>“Oh, holy shit!” Caspar exclaimed, pulling free from Linhardt to scramble out of his shirt, which caused Hilda, Marianne and Leonie to squeal in a mix of delight, horror and amusement.</p><p>He barely spared them a glance, taking Linhardt’s hand again so that the soulmark at the base of his breastbone took on a golden hue. Giddy and incredulous, Caspar had leaned back to watch, and ran the tips of two fingers over it, holding his chest close to a top surgery scar.</p><p>His attention snapped back to Linhardt’s gaze, almost bashful now as he asked, “Can I see yours?”</p><p>Linhardt was red. His free hand drifted to his thigh and he shook his head, but his mouth betrayed him. “Not here.”</p><p>Caspar considered the rest of his guests for a moment, but decided they weren’t really his guests anyway, and pulled Linhardt inside. He shouted for his benefit, and that of the others left outside, “We gotta talk!”</p><p>Ashe approached the door, pupils blown wide in shock as his eyes trained on Caspar’s soulmark as the two men ran past him. “Well,” he sighed in surprise, waving in the crowd, “happy new year.”</p><p>“Happy new year!” Hilda agreed, skipping into the shelter of the entryway.</p><p>“Good for them,” Claude chuckled, kicking the snow from his boots.</p><p>“I wonder if we’ll see them again,” said Fae.</p><p>A blush hid some of Ashe’s freckles as a result of the implication, and he soundly closed the door behind Lorenz, turning to the next closest person as he spun around. “Ahem. Yes well, it’s good to— Oh!”</p><p>Free of her winter gloves, Marianne had taken his hand, and the soulmark on the back of her neck began glowing bright green.</p><p>Claude had seen many people find their soulmates, more than the average person, but never in succession. He squeezed a hand on Hilda’s shoulder, knowing she would understand, but called for Linhardt, because only he would be interested in talking out the statistics and societal implications. “Oh! OH! Linhardt! COME BACK!”</p><p>Blushing about Claude making a scene, Lorenz sighed, unable to suppress a smile, and hurried out of his winter things to chase after where Claude had gone to call up a staircase. He stepped behind Hilda, who had a hand over her mouth, and was bouncing excitedly on her heels as she waited for her friend’s reaction.</p><p>Marianne gasped, belatedly, and wiggled her fingers, testing the connection. “Ashe?” she confirmed.</p><p>“Ah! Yes, I’m sorry,” he raised his free hand, and then realized he didn’t really have anything to do with it, and let it drop on top of Marianne’s hand, “Ashe Ubert. You must be Marianne?”</p><p>As politely as she could, Marianne started to extract her hand, having seen Caspar’s recent reaction to finding his soulmate. She nodded, before worrying aloud, “Please don’t grab me.”</p><p>Ashe held his hands up in surrender. “No! Oh! Of course not,” he dropped them to his sides, awkwardly. “I wouldn’t. Heh.” He squared his shoulders, smiling brighter, “I guess … it’s especially good to meet you?”</p><p>Hilda leaned on the back of Marianne’s shoulders next, introducing herself and letting some of her excitement bleed through. Fae looked to the left of the entryway, to the open kitchen, where Dimitri could be heard on a cellphone, and from where Dedue was finally approaching, carrying a snack board and an empty bowl.</p><p>“Dedue!” Fae exclaimed, taking the bowl from him.</p><p>“Fae,” he answered, “I—”</p><p>“Both of your roommates just met their soulmates.”</p><p>Dedue blinked thoughtfully, and regarded Ashe and Marianne with a warm smile, “I see. Well then. Congratulations to you both?” He gestured vaguely. “Perhaps you should sit down for a while?”</p><p>Marianne peeped in a way that made plain her distress. “I-I’m not ready!” Blushing, she clasped her hands together in front of her chest, and clarified more gently, “To be alone with you. You understand?”</p><p>Ashe had gone from horrified that he was being accused of something to quietly relieved, but Hilda hooked an arm with each him and Marianne as she assured her friend, “We’ll sit with you.” She turned her head over her shoulder to Lorenz, popping a foot in his direction as she ordered, “Lorenz, grab Claude and offer Dedue help with anything.”</p><p>A brief moment of eye contact was all she needed to see that he was as pleased as he was helpless to obey, and she turned away from Lorenz as he nodded to their host, even as he answered her, “Yes, of course.” He took another long stride away from the crowd as he chased after their boyfriend. “Claude!”</p><p>Leaning away from the stairwell, Claude was still wrestling with the great improbabilities surrounding him. Elated with the strangeness of the situation, and disappointed at being unable to elaborate in a way that the others might appreciate, he gave Lorenz a pleading look as he approached.</p><p>“Let them be,” Lorenz requested.</p><p>“Do you have any idea how unlikely this is?”</p><p>“It’s going to stress out Marianne if you focus on it,” Lorenz explained, hoping his answer was implied. He could hardly support Claude through the whole of his career and have no inkling of the intricacies of soulmates.</p><p>Claude pouted, quietly cooing her name for Lorenz’s benefit as he let him lead him to the open living room, “<em> Marianne.</em>”</p><p>“I know,” he chortled. “It’s very exciting.”</p><p>Fae and Leonie sat with Dedue on one sofa, whispering quietly between bites of little finger foods that rested on the table in front of them and the others. The once-empty bowl already holding a handful of used toothpicks. There was an armchair opposite them, and four chairs scattered around, so that Claude and Lorenz had a silent exchange before pulling chairs up between the two perpendicular couches, bringing Lorenz closer to Marianne and putting Claude beside Fae.</p><p>“So what do you do?” Hilda asked Ashe, as she wrapped an arm around Marianne, who looked sidelong to Lorenz. Her suppressed amusement was so delightful, that Lorenz forced a cough into a fist to keep from snorting.</p><p>“Well, I’m in grad school,” Ashe answered, with some pride at the same time Leonie accused her friend.</p><p>“Lorenz, don’t be gross.”</p><p>“I’m about eight months into an entry level job with social services.”</p><p>“Gross?” He worried suddenly that his cough, in answer to Hilda’s inquiry, could be seen as suggestive. “I’m not so uncouth as that. My throat was dry.”</p><p>Ashe’s eyes skipped past Hilda to Marianne before drifting downwards, as if he were working through a confession, “I was just a dishwasher before that. I’m excited to … <em> well </em> ,” he hesitated, rubbing the front of his left shoulder, “I think that word’s taken on new meaning for me, just now, but, I <em> was </em> excited to be qualified for some better positions. I’d like to help change policies if I can.”</p><p>“You’re driven,” Marianne said, by way of a compliment.</p><p>“Oh. Drinks?” Dedue interrupted, processing Lorenz’s statement. Leonie and Lorenz stood to help him, while a number of the crowd nodded.</p><p>“I’m inspired,” Ashe countered. “My birth parents died when I was very young. My siblings and I were separated by the Ministry, it was … more than a miracle to be adopted by a man who agreed to go through the work to reunite us. I was already thirteen.”</p><p>Ashe couldn’t read Hilda’s surprise, or Marianne’s expression at all, and waited patiently for them to explain.</p><p>“I’m also adopted,” Marianne said finally. “Although my birth parents are still living.”</p><p>The conversation sought other similarities then, some obvious, that Claude and Hilda would have overlooked, like his shared cats and her foster animals, that she too was still in veterinary school, and their piety, while others were more subtle, and when Claude tried to explain them, this only bred more confusion, and riled his raging interest.</p><p>Dimitri apologized to those in the kitchen for being distant, and that his work should be finished soon. Lorenz and Leonie looked politely away while he and Dedue shared a casual kiss before Dimitri stepped out towards a back door. </p><p>Meanwhile Hilda moved to sit in Claude’s lap.</p><p>“Honey,” she cooed, an arm around his neck.</p><p>Claude allowed himself to be led to look to where Ashe and Marianne had shifted to face each other, their clothed knees touching, their hands so close, as they found a rhythm in their curiosity.</p><p>Silently he pouted, lamenting that his enthusiasm might have kept Marianne from having a chance to speak. Hilda tapped the tip of his nose.</p><p>Smiling again, Claude whispered his wonder. “Has this happened before? Are there pockets of soulmates? How is that some people go their whole lives without meeting theirs and we have a house practically full of people who met their soulmate before thirty?”</p><p>“Speak for yoursellllf,” Leonie exaggerated, handing Fae a drink as she leaned forward between them.</p><p>Dedue’s eyes were on Dimitri, outside the window to the backdoor, but they drifted to where Hilda was adjusting some loose strands of Claude’s hair, and he spoke loud enough to capture their attention as he reclaimed his seat.</p><p>“I wanted to let you know,” he smiled, sensing the reaction this would have, “Dimitri’s invited some of his friends also. One we know,” Dedue said, gesturing with a finger on the hand that held his drink to include Fae, Claude and Hilda in his statement. “Sylvain Gautier purchased some flowers at the Natural Order before approaching his soulmate at Claude’s instruction; and he told Dimitri of our shop.”</p><p>Hilda yelped as Claude leaned forward, half expecting him to drop her on the floor, but his arms coiled carefully around her with the motion, so that she probably hadn’t needed to claw at the back of his head as she had, her foot kicking up so that it almost caught Fae’s elbow.</p><p>“Saints above,” Lorenz cursed, chiding their display as he distributed drinks to Ashe and Marianne.</p><p>Claude hissed in pain, but still, he exclaimed, “Sylvain’s going to be here?!”</p><p>“Claude, stop thinking about it,” Lorenz begged, gently, trying to be sympathetic considering he too was starting to feel the absurdity of the situation. His subconscious joked that he should invite his father, and see whether his soulmate materialized as a result of proximity.</p><p>“But,” Claude peeped, frowning at Hilda, who tossed her head back with a groan.</p><p>Carefully, Claude set her back to her feet, and stood at the same time. Dimitri approached the group, free of his cellphone, and Claude turned his head towards Fae and Dedue, announcing, “I’m going to talk to Dimitri.”</p><p>“Alright,” Fae laughed, standing also, but to grab more of Dedue’s snacks before piling into the armchair with Hilda, as they injected themselves back into Ashe and Marianne’s conversation, now about what it felt like to move away from each their adoptive parents.</p><p>Meanwhile Lorenz shifted to the chair closest to Dedue, complimenting his home, culinary skills and patient hosting, which Dedue quickly had to get back to, when more guests knocked at the door.</p><p> </p><p>It was hours before Lin and Caspar emerged from the upper reaches of the house, four cats following them halfway down the staircase to peek at the gathered crowd. Startling a little when presented with so many unfamiliar faces, Linhardt chose to sit with Leonie’s loud teasing rather than Hilda’s quiet gossip, more ready to face embarrassment than the more personal feelings Hilda might needle at. Caspar’s energetic personality was not at all what Leonie had expected for him, her point made plain as Caspar shouted his surprise for Ashe and Marianne, before pulling his friend into a choking embrace.</p><p> </p><p>A new year’s special blared over the television so that people were either whispering side by side or shouting over the noise. Sylvain spoke at a volume that would be heard by Claude and Linhardt, the three of them standing opposite the ottoman that seated Fae, Caspar and Felix. The six of them surrounded a table supporting a misshapen jenga tower that they were all engaged in toying with. “It was a banner ad on youtube.”</p><p>Linhardt groaned and Claude swung his head in disappointment, because that opened up so many possibilities that were impossible to investigate. Sylvain chuckled.</p><p>“Not that one,” Caspar warned Fae, reaching for a tile. There were a few lines in the tower where single game pieces already supported the structure, but considering the number of tiles atop and below the row Fae had reached for, where two pieces sat side by side, Caspar’s apprehension made sense.</p><p>“Don’t <b>help</b> them,” Felix chastised. The other players looked at him critically, and Felix went red with guilt. He turned away from their attention to swallow a mouthful of his drink, as though that might help regulate his words and his competitive drive.</p><p>After smiling as best they could to reassure Caspar and Felix both, Fae said, to Claude, “I’m going to do it.”</p><p>As Claude nodded, Linhardt asked Sylvain, “Well do you remember what you were doing? What you were watching and why?”</p><p>Sylvain snorted in amusement, with himself, not the tower that wobbled precariously as Fae neatly stacked their tile. “Uh, yeah, I do.”</p><p>“You didn’t tell me this,” Felix observed, and Sylvain tilted his drink towards him, a cheersing motion that brought a squint and skeptic amusement to his soulmate’s face.</p><p>“Hey!” Fae exclaimed, confronting Caspar, choosing a far more dangerous tile in the second last row at the base of the tower. He grinned mischievously, and with four taps, dislodged the game piece. “Accusing me of—”</p><p>Felix stood up, leaving his drink on the table with a loud ‘tock’ in preparation of taking his turn, but the action vibrated the table enough that the other players’ eyes widened as they watched their game for signs of falling.</p><p>As nonchalantly as he could, Felix dropped his hand from covering his mouth.</p><p>“Move over.” He spoke to Sylvain, but Claude and Linhardt followed him, shifting towards the window.</p><p>“Don’t break anything,” Sylvain said, smiling.</p><p>“That’s why I’m coming to your side of the table,” Felix confirmed. With Fae and Caspar each taking riskier moves one after another, Felix eyed the three single middle pieces in the tower, two near the middle and one near the top, and tried to calculate the best one to knock free.</p><p>“I was watching Little Mercy,” Sylvain told Claude and Linhardt. “This woman named Mercedes reads and writes original horror stories. They’re not all good, but they’re all good fun.” He bumped an elbow against Claude, “And your ad was on the side of the page.”</p><p>It was about then that they realized what Felix intended, and the three standing men gasped as they made to object, while Fae and Caspar yelped. All reactionary, too late to stop from swinging his left arm in to strike through the fragile tower. A single tile crashed against a radiator on the opposite side of the room with a metallic clang, but to Felix’s credit, the tower remained standing. Dimitri materialized instantly with concern that flared into incredulity, that only seemed pacified since Caspar was present, the house as much his as Dedue’s. The jenga tile was retrieved with no harm done, and Claude insisted Dimitri take his turn despite his and Sylvain’s protests. Fae helped guide him by choosing a tile only three rows from the top, an easy choice for his large trembling fingers, and the game found a rhythm again.</p><p> </p><p>Most of the remaining guests were in the living room. While Leonie and Flayn found themselves talking about fish, both exotic and to be eaten, Dedue, Ingrid, Hilda and Annette were speaking of music, concerts and siblings. Ingrid held Caspar’s brown tabby, Meatball, after the lazy monster had been found creeping between the couches, investigating the commotion. Ashe and Marianne were seated away on the stairwell so that she could meet the other cats, while they spoke of literature and video games, fantasy and romance with Lorenz, who might have thought he were intruding, if Marianne hadn’t led him by the hand herself to their little spot of seclusion. Galahad, a white shorthair, and the father of their recent kittens, bumped his head against Marianne’s elbow for the nth time as she got distracted from petting him when she was able to speak lovingly of a heroine that had helped her feel more secure in herself as a teenager.</p><p>“She was so inspirational,” Marianne said softly. “Her challenges weren’t as dramatic as some of her companions, but … I felt that I could relate to her pain.” She blushed. “I may have cried when she finally got her justice against her ancestors.”</p><p>“I’ll have to read it again,” Ashe said, fond in a way that Lorenz wouldn’t have previously imagined of newly met soulmates. Elsewhere, in what should have been a dining room, but was hardly decorated as such, a loud clash and clattering of little wooden jenga pieces sounded through the house.</p><p>Galahad dashed up the stairs with his fellows, and Ashe scoffed, shrugging off the noise. He did a double take of the cats on the stairs before offering to his present company, “Would you like to see the kittens?”</p><p>“Will their mother be alright with so many people?” Marianne worried.</p><p>Lorenz looked between the two of them pointedly, and started to suggest, “I don’t need to—”</p><p>“Oh, please,” Marianne begged of him.</p><p>“Yeah,” Ashe chuckled, standing. “It’ll be fine. Paladin’s used to Caspar, she can handle you two.”</p><p>Lorenz grimaced, considerate. “You know Claude would be infinitely jealous. Let me get him to go with you instead,” he suggested to Marianne.</p><p>“Well grab him, but no one else,” Ashe suggested.</p><p>“Yes, do,” Marianne agreed. “We’ll be right here.”</p><p> </p><p>An orange splotched cat named Inferno darted into Caspar’s open doorway when they reached the second floor, but a black and white gentlemanly cat named Knives only stayed so far that he felt he might not be reached by the crowd. He sat in the middle of the upstairs hallway. Galahad skirted through their legs, meowing when he realized he could be reunited with his mate.</p><p>“You behave yourself,” Ashe warned.</p><p>“He’s been fixed since?” Marianne confirmed.</p><p>“Yeah,” Ashe sighed, “but he stood on one of the kittens the first time we let him see them. He’s seen them a few times since, but I still worry.” He closed the door behind their little gathering, keeping Galahad in the hall.</p><p>His room was neat and spoke of his work and hobbies. His bed was hastily made, the covers blue and patterned with the phases of the moon. Ashe sat on the edge of it, scaring the white and grey cat awake. She meowed at him with a yawn.</p><p>“So this is Paladin,” Ashe said, laughing a little as he introduced his cats.</p><p>“Very noble parents,” Claude observed, and Lorenz bumped his elbow against Claude’s back.</p><p>“Ingrid calls them my Gal Pals.”</p><p>Marianne giggled sweetly, and Ashe turned to watch. He waved the others in as he stood again, moving to the open door of the closet. He cooed and kissed for the babies, and Paladin jumped down to join him, sniffing the tiny creatures that waddled into the light on skinny little legs. They were met with gasps and coos, and Marianne moved to join Ashe on the floor.</p><p>“They’re so little,” Claude whined. He hesitated a moment, until Marianne looked back at him, before joining them on his knees.</p><p>Lorenz sat on the bed, craning to watch as Ashe carefully reached out to scoop up a white kitten with a pink nose to drop in Marianne’s lap.</p><p>“Aren’t you darling?” she praised, met with meeps and sniffles. Paladin came to bump Marianne’s hands with her paw, and she did her best to orient the kitten on her thighs, to cradle the young creature while keeping her hands free.</p><p>Ashe placed a white kitten with a tri colored nose in Claude’s lap next, but the kitten was squirming, so Claude let her back to the floor, wiggling a fingertip for the kitten’s attention.</p><p>The third kitten, grey and white, was brought onto the bed by Lorenz’s side to his surprise.</p><p>“Careful,” Ashe requested.</p><p>“Of course,” Lorenz confirmed. “What a baby.” He ran his thumb over the top of the kitten’s head, pulling away when curious teeth came as a surprise.</p><p>“So that’s Justice,” Ashe said, about the kitten in Marianne’s lap, and she was struck with a delighted laugh. “Honor,” Ashe pointed to the kitten falling over as she raised her hindquarters, trying to intimidate Claude’s fingers. “And that one’s Chivalry,” he said about the kitten on the bed, “but Caspar calls him Tapeworm.”</p><p>All three of his guests looked at him with concern, Lorenz pulling his hand once again away from the gnawing kitten. “What?”</p><p>Ashe rolled his eyes and clicked his tongue. “He’s attached. We can’t have more than five cats in the household, so these guys need to be adopted out, but Caspar seems to think Dedue’s going to move out soon, and we definitely can’t afford this place just the two of us, so if he’s moving out, he could technically keep Tapeworm if no one else adopts him. But he’s healthy, no tapeworms to worry about.”</p><p>Claude did his best to laugh politely as Lorenz groaned, spooking Tapeworm by placing the whole of his hand around his back. “You had better hope you’re adopted,” he told the kitten. “Chivalry is a much finer name than Tapeworm.”</p><p>“Do the others have homes?” Claude asked, rolling his fingers on the floor so that his nails made a clattering noise.</p><p>“Not yet,” Ashe confirmed. Realization hit him. “Would you like one?”</p><p>“Claude, you don’t need a kitten,” Lorenz said quickly, so that Claude frowned in his direction. “There are older, wiser pets in need of adoption.”</p><p>“Yeah, but these guys need a home too,” Ashe said desperately. “I swear I’m not breeding them. It was just bad luck and timing for when we were able to get some of these cats inside. It’s not like you’d be supporting a shady practice.”</p><p>Claude raised his eyebrows as if to consider Ashe’s plea, but then tried to reassure Lorenz. “I wouldn’t want to put everyone out. I know kittens are a lot of work.” He wrapped his hand around Honor’s side, sliding her towards him to rub two fingers on her belly. “But you’re so cute, aren’t you? Someone’s lifelong friend, if not mine.”</p><p>She rolled around, and within a few minutes was climbing up the back of Claude’s sweater, with Marianne’s supervision, as he leaned forward and allowed it to happen.</p><p>When they washed their hands to return to the main floor, Lorenz whispered to Claude more seriously in the hallway, and then asked Ashe about placing a hold on the kitten for at least five days for them to consider.</p><p> </p><p>Hilda loved being with her friends and meeting new people, but it felt like she was relearning how to do both of those things tonight. So often for her meeting new people had meant a more flirtatious introduction, and specific expectations, and being with her friends too, had meant shying away from discussions of work and soulmates.</p><p>It was freeing, to be able to talk about celebrity gossip with Dimitri and not feel like their interaction was a performance, or like she couldn’t express her thoughts about soulmates and how they related to the layperson versus the elite without hurting herself. It was funny, to be interrupted mid discussion because midnight was approaching, and Dedue wanted to be sure everyone had something to toast with and to watch them exchange a quickly held hand for their soulmarks to activate. It was lovely, to be wrapped in Claude’s embrace as the countdown tolled, holding Fae’s hand as they were spun around to lean into her, Lorenz’s arm around Claude’s neck, securing their connection.</p><p>Midnight was met with cheers and drinking and kisses, until Ingrid stuck her arm out wide, snapping her fingers as she declared, “Okay, okay! Too many couples here!”</p><p>“I think it’s romantic,” Flayn countered.</p><p>“You need a kiss, sweetheart?” Sylvain offered Ingrid, so that she groaned and he choked as Felix tapped the center of his chest with the side of his fist.</p><p>Fae accepted Lorenz’s empty glass in the hand that held their own as he extended his arms around the others, squeezing his grip on Hilda’s bare shoulder.</p><p>“I love you,” Claude whispered, deep and warm, so that Hilda felt his words in her chest.</p><p>“Happy new year,” Lorenz answered.</p><p>Fae shifted so that Lorenz had to pull away, breaking their connection for a moment so Fae could face their partners.</p><p>“It’s going to be a good year,” they said, and Hilda kissed them in relief, and excitement.</p><p>Then she also moved in a way that forced the four of them to break apart, squealing, first to them, and then to their friends, “Happy new year!”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Pairing up extra soulmates was partially me making fun of everyone pairing off at the end of fe3h and partially fun because I love fluff.</p><p>The soulmates are not reflective of my "end-all" ships / "otp's" for this game. It's just fun.</p><p>Claude can't have a wyvern, but he can have a cat. I didn't expect to be getting him one so soon (it'll be another like 3 months in-fic anyway), but then I was like ... wait. I already have kittens lined up for the story.</p><p>Please tell me what you think Caspar and Dedue supports would look like. :3c</p><p>I hope you're still having fun! Next chapter's a smut chapter. I'd love a kudos or comment. I appreciate you for reading!</p>
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